Why Jesus Rejects "Good People" (The Scary Truth) | #049 | Unlearned Wisdom
00:00 Intro
02:36 How do you draw empathy boundaries?
06:53 How do you handle judgment as a pastor?
14:05 Johnny shares a personal weakness story
18:50 What would sleeping in church teach you?
22:58 What did you do differently afterward?
32:11 Weakness versus avoiding accountability
38:04 Is it good to be weak?
45:39 Should you publicly share your weaknesses?
47:43 How do you approach hard truths in dating?
49:48 Should you confess struggles like porn addiction?
51:51 Should you tell your pastor everything?
55:40 How do you actually go to God in prayer?
01:03:48 Should you try to overcome your weaknesses?
01:09:29 Can you reach peace without struggle?
01:21:43 How do trauma and weakness shape healing?
01:26:30 How do you know if guilt is from God?
01:30:02 What weaknesses ruin relationships?
Welcome to another episode of the Unlearned Wisdom Podcast with yours truly, Johnny Chang, where each episode is a gospel-centered lesson that you could apply to your life today. In this episode, we're going to talk about how to overcome your personal weaknesses and that guilt that you feel, whether or not that's from God or from the enemy. And towards the end, we're actually going to also help you guys overcome your past traumas and everything from your past that's affecting you. Let's go. Let's get started. And it's episode 49, so let's do this. 49. Hey, actually. Wow, we're close to 50. Hey, guess what? You're not Johnny Chang anymore. You're Pastor Chang. Wow. Are we allowed to talk about that? Pastor, yes, we are allowed to. Oh, we can talk about it? Pastor, pastor. Nice. So tell them what's up. So I was always a minister at my church, and I did prison ministry there. And Pastor one day was like, you know what, Johnny? You're kind of getting really big. I think you should actually go and start your own church. And I was like, no, because it's so fun to be behind the pastor and be like, I didn't mess up. Like, here's the pastor, right? So I think he was challenging me to kind of walk out in faith and walk by faith. And so, yeah, we ended up doing it. It was a difficult legal process. Basically, we had to go through like so many like hoops and stuff. But in the end, God willing, we became a COTH church. Basically, we're under COTH ministries, bro. We're a ministry now, guys. Let's go full on. So I'm a pastor. That's a janitor Jeremy. Deacon Kim. I'm Lord Kim. Master of the broom closet. Dude, Aaron got the fryer. He looks like a monk. This looks like a tunic. Do we get cool names at the church? Yeah, sure. What roles did you give me in Aaron? Head of custodial. Leader of custodial operations. Oh, yes. The environmental specialist. Your CEO. Custodial executive officer. What's Aaron? I don't know. Aaron is, he's the viral, I don't know. I was going to give him a real title. Viral specialist. I'll be parking attendant. Yeah, he'll do parking. He'd be bad at that. Okay, guys, the first topic is a little more serious, though. I sent you guys each a video. Please pull it up on your phones. Editor will cut this in. They'll put it on the screen so you guys can watch. Watch the video. Dude, I don't care. I don't care about ICE. I don't care about the protests. I don't care about Venezuela. I literally don't care about any of it anymore. I mean, we're told that we have to care about everything and that caring about
everything makes us a good person. But the truth is, is that if you are emotionally invested in things that you have zero power to change, that's not empathy. That's ego. And we actually know better too. Like our minds aren't wired to care deeply for more than 150 people. But we forget that when we scroll and then we get hit with empathy fatigue. So we stay anxious, feel guilty and feel exhausted all the time. And the thing is, is that rational psychology says this clearly. Caring beyond your ability to act is an irrational belief. Like you're allowed to say, I don't tear as a boundary. This isn't apathy. It's humility. So my question is, how do you draw the line to be empathetic towards someone versus they're a mental burden and you push them away? Or you can say like, I don't want any part of this. Yeah. I think again, we're called to like be empathetic and point people towards God. But like when people start to absorb the traumas and the problems and the guilt and the anxiety, that's what bro was talking about. He was like, we can only care about 150 people. And like on one scroll, it dictates basically our whole like identity, our whole feelings. And like, that's not empathy. That's ego. It's like feeding this heart of like, oh, I'm so good. And look at I'm connected to these people. And I care about them. When really you're just feeding the heart of like, I want to be a good person. Why is that necessarily a bad thing, for example? It's not a bad thing unless you start judging people for it. It seems like he was saying like, they're utilizing that and going, no one's like following me. And that they're not doing it my way. So like, I, you know, and if you say you don't care, that's a bad thing, right? That's like his whole thing. He's like, I don't care is actually a good thing. It's a boundary. It's humility to be like, I don't necessarily care. And I'm just being honest here. Whereas most people will be forced to care because they're scared that if they say that for real, other people would ridicule them. So that's not empathy. That's pride. That's ego. I agree. I, I guess there's two parts for me sometimes because I'm definitely very privileged. Like I've never, uh, had to, like, I've never had my family members deported or anything like that. And like, I've never been without food or shelter over my head for the most part. So how does it feel though, when people are like, well, because you've had it so good, maybe it's time you open your mind a little bit and see what other people are going to try to put yourself in someone else's shoes for once. Cause it's easy when everything's fine to be like, eh, it doesn't bother me. I don't really need to care. I think like
again, it's, it's difficult to answer that because everybody's moral intuition is different and everyone's moral standard is different. It's all subjective, right? So do I care more like to you if I care, if I pick a side, then I'll placate only to one side, right? Like the other side, I'll piss a couple of people off. So for me, it's like, everything has to be as crazy as this is gospel centered and Christ centered. It's like, how did Jesus choose? He drew boundaries and he was like, look, here are the Pharisees and here are the people who are like the woman caught in the act of adultery. I need to choose obviously. Yes. But I'm not choosing to like bend and like break for people. I'm choosing what's true. Right? And so again, if it's anything aside from the good news is all bad news. That's how I see it. Right? So anything that's not the truth is a lie. Anything that's not, and God says, I am the way, the life, the truth. So anything aside from Jesus and gospel centered stuff again is, uh, it's kind of pointless to kind of like think about, right? That's why he was saying, I don't care. It's like, bro, I'm so, I have things that I have to do and it's like, I can't just sit there and waste all my energy on other things because somebody else feels like I should be wasting my energy on this one thing. Do you ever feel as a pastor though? Right? I'm taking, take political or global events just like as a pastor, people judge you of like how you need to care for your congregation or whatever it is. And so how do you deal with that? I mean, I just realized that there's a lot of people who are just side busting, right? In the, in the, in it's a prison term, but basically like they don't, they're not doing anything themselves. So of course they're going to sit there and ridicule people. And I'm not saying not be teachable. I think it's okay to listen to people, take it as information and then compare it with the truth. Are my fruits showing what they're saying, right? Are people leaving the congregation massively because they don't like my tonality or is it just one out of a thousand people that's saying, I don't like your tone. Well then I don't think I would change it if it's, if the majority of people are listening to the truth and actually are, are loving the tonality, right? Those things are subjective. More importantly, I think it's what are you focused on? Uh, if the main message is about the gospel, you can't expect a mango to taste like a pineapple, right? You can't expect a hardened criminal to be like, you need to be nice. And I genuinely think like, you know, that's the issue is I feel like you're good if I like, you're
good if I feel like you're good, right? You're, you're a good person if I think you're good. But that's, again, that can change as paper thin because what happens when they don't think that you're good? We've seen this, like all pastors get toppled over this. We've seen artists, celebrities get toppled over this diehard fans and they do something wrong. They flip on them overnight to the point where people are even like unaliving themselves or like, you know, just disappear completely for years. Like the, the squid game guy, he was gone for like years. And in Korea, they're very cancel culture, right? And so it's like, yo, you messed up and bro had to go away for like 11 years to then finally be like, Hey guys, I'm still here. Okay. We forgive you after 11 years. It's like crazy. So yeah. The turning on celebrities is so interesting because for the first time ever, I'm seeing on tick tock, like people turning on Taylor Swift because of some, if you ever followed the Justin about basically Blake Lively, her husband maliciously went after, uh, one of her co-stars and he collected all the evidence and they tried to ruin his career. And it's like this crazy case and they're releasing the jet. The court is releasing all these text messages and it's Taylor Swift and this, these three people trying to go after this guy when he was completely innocent. And now for the first time ever, like you could never say anything about bad about Taylor Swift. And now the evidence is all out there and everyone's turning. Yeah. And I'm just like, everyone's it's fickle, right? It's and what's crazy is like, I don't even know about that. So like, yeah, I don't only care about that, Johnny. No, no, no. I'm just, I'm Taylor Swift, but I'm saying that's only in that like, like mill you, right? It's like, that's, that's only in their space. Like, I'm sure if somebody was like, cancel Johnny Chang, LeBron wouldn't be like, cancel me. It'd be like, what, who is this guy? Yeah, it looks like cancellable. Like, you know, let me shoot my shots, right? So at the end of the day, it's just like it doesn't even really matter I think people waste a lot of time and that is What the enemy does is he focuses on weaknesses as we're talking about today and going look they have more of a weakness than me and so I have to vilify these people and That way I can hide behind that without having to expose myself and deal with all the traumas and the things that's inside of my heart Too and my own weaknesses if you guys realize that everyone's just weak at the end of the day
Like it doesn't even become an issue Jeremy. You're a child. I didn't see but did he point it? Yeah What's your take on the whole thing well, I really like what Johnny said about like don't plagiarize him say your own take well, I'm just like when you said that like I'm if you're just posting something out of fear of like To say that you like when you really don't care and you fear to say that you don't care So you just post something to appease everyone. It's like is that really activism or is that just a what is that? We're both Asian. You didn't post a yellow square during stop a API. Hey No, I was posting the other content that no Yeah, my page got banned it was a weird time But but yeah, just like how can you possibly care about everything like you're saying it's like you could never care about everything I remember seeing like you're not meant to care about more than 150 people or whatever it is I saw a meme it was like there's some idiot under a waterfall right now with no phone who has no idea What's wrong with the world? It must be so dumb and happy and it's just like it's so true, man Yeah, so just like you can't possibly care about everything There's something horrible going on in every corner of the world in every corner of your own country in every corner of your own town There's horrible horrible things going on and people are mad that if you don't tweet about it from your child slave labor iPhone device It's like yeah you people what they pick and choose to care about it's just so interesting because you could never Actually care about everything. It's yeah, it's like that even in spirituality, right? Like when they go you need to repent You're only repenting for the things you feel bad about like are you actually Repenting for the things like let's say like if you're under the old like Levitical laws Like if you're wearing mixed cottons, you're gonna burn in hell But they're not like God forgive me for wearing Adidas and Nike to get like it's like no one does that again? It's all Forgive me for this polyester blend. Yeah, literally, right? It's like it feels so good But I know it's demonic like it's no one does that but at the same time they want to go and be like This is what I care about. And again, it's all subjective. It's all like humanistic standards. So true, you know So for me, it's it's you got to focus more on that one common ground Which is the gospel that ties into everything even people who don't believe like I mean, that's why it's so difficult to navigate, right? I see a lot of unbelievers and I'm not trying to be mean but they're like really
They struggle a lot with things because well not necessarily but I'm like, where is your like? Where do you find like, you know, I guess the center line right because what's good to you is Different than what's good to me. And so and and it's different than what's good to somebody else So is it just a popularity thing? I'll tell you where yeah, just their feelings everyone's feelings true it's the same with everything we're talking about with what to care about and what because people are always like, um They care so much about these specific parts of the Bible But they'll ignore the parts that make them feel upset that they're not happy with and it's the same with what they choose to Put squares online about it's what makes them feel like they're doing some justice or whatever But they're not gonna acknowledge the thing that would make them unhappy the fact that they would have to get rid of their iPhones They would have to get rid of their car. It's like no, I'm not gonna acknowledge carbon emissions I'd rather acknowledge this because it doesn't actually affect me. It's not actually a part of my feelings Sheesh so Johnny share us a story about a true moment of personal weakness. I personally have none I was I tried to come up with a story of personal weakness couldn't think of anything for myself Yeah, I'm sure you and Aaron have a bunch. I think for me. It was difficult when when pastor was There's a time where I would just fall asleep on every single sermon and Then I just don't know why I just would knock out I would purse purposely sleep better like sleep longer like sleep earlier even and As soon as I heard the word, I would just like super like get sleepy. I could have full energy Doesn't matter and so I remember one of the pastors was like you shouldn't fall asleep, but then pastor Kim was like I don't care if you fall asleep. So I was kind of like who do I listen to you know, and And I guess around that pastor, I was like trying to stay awake. And then around Pastor Kim, I was a little bit more free. And this was difficult because pastor wasn't mad that I was falling asleep, but he was more like, why do you think you're like good? Like, and I'm like, what do you mean? Why do I think I'm good? I'm trying to follow inside of the church.
And he's like, if you do this, you will end up leaving the church. And I couldn't understand that, right? And so it actually happened one day where I felt like mixed, too much mixed information. One pastor would say this, and then pastor would say that, and then I would get chastised by this pastor. And then when I would follow this pastor, then I would get chastised by Pastor Kim. And I couldn't like understand why, like it was very confusing. So at the end of it, I just was like, F it, I'm gonna dip out, you know? And so the one thing that Pastor Kim said was like, he kind of baited me, right? And he goes, oh, are you angry? He just, one day I was in the restroom, we were like, I was washing my hands, he's washing his hands. He's like, oh, are you mad? Are you mad at me, Johnny? And I was, but you know, I didn't want him to know that. So I was like, no. And he's like, yeah, yeah. You're so, how you get mad all the time, huh? Over the smallest things, huh? And I'm just like, ah, like I was getting mad, like legit hot. And he's like, yeah, I mean, it's just, it's crazy, right? Like you're like 20 something years old
and you're still mad about those little things. Like, isn't it kind of like pathetic? Like, that's how he said it. And I just looked at him and I was like, gonna rip his head off. Like literally I was like, okay, that's just how I am. He's like, exactly. That's what he said. And I was like, what do you mean? And he's like, exactly. That's how you are. He's like, your heart, you know, it's like so closed and callous, but like if you just learn to acknowledge who you are, what's the problem? Okay, so let's say you got mad that I chastised you and then you got mad that that pastor chastised you. Remember when I told you that you're a good person? And I was like, yeah. He's like, you're trying to like please both people. Just be you. Like, that's all you have to do. Like you don't, you're not understanding. Like you think you can follow directions so well. Johnny, I'm sorry to say, but when have you followed directions well? And I was like, dang. And so he was like teaching me these little lessons that I felt like pricked me and like moved me out of like my comfort zone,
but it was only to just acknowledge who I was and acknowledge my weakness, which is I don't like authority and I do think I'm a good person. I can't grow with God if I think I'm a good person. And then he explained that concept that time of when you're good, you cannot listen. Because why? He used analogy of like a barber shop, right? He's like, let's say Johnny, you're trying to be a barber. If you think you're pretty good at barbering, when you go in, even as an apprentice, you're not gonna be able to listen to the person giving you gems because you're like, oh, I already know how to do a fade. Like, you're not gonna actually pick up on that. You're gonna always have this kind of filter of like, I know what I know. Let me see what I think is good. Let me see what, where I can learn and improve. Like, you're not gonna like take everything in versus somebody who's like, I don't know anything. Number one, you have to be humble because of that. You don't know anything. So you're like thankful in this environment that people are pouring into you. And so when he said that, it clicked to me. Because I didn't understand when he was like, you think you're good. I was like, I don't think I'm good though.
I don't actually, but then underneath it, there was a heart of like, if I don't think I'm good, then how come I can't listen to him who's better than me? Like, and how come I'm trying to listen as well to like everybody else to show that I'm submitted and I'm listening? Like, I'm not a person who ever listened. Why can't I accept that? By him telling you just sleep, what would that teach you? Like, let's say you're just, all right, I'll just sleep. Yeah. What would that have taught you? So it's teaching me, because it's not about the sleep. That's what he was saying. He's basically saying like, if you sleep, if you don't wanna sleep, that's not the issue. It's your thought that like you think if someone tells you something, you could just follow them. You're not understanding that you need grace though. Right, and he's like, you need grace to be able to sit there and be like, all right, I'm gonna try to follow, but I will knock out. And then when someone chastises you, you just accept that. Cause I didn't wanna get chastised. That was the issue. I didn't want that pastor who I didn't really know to tell me that I was lazy and I didn't care about the word. Like, I didn't wanna feel bad about myself. And what he was saying was, what's the issue with that? Just feel bad if you have to and move forward or don't.
And just be like, yeah, I fell asleep. We're hiring guys. Core of the Heart is hiring, but listen carefully. We're not just building a company. We're building one of the fastest growing Christian communities in the world. In just a year and a half, this community has grown to over 3 million strong and we're nowhere near done. Our mission is simple, but massive to build. The best tools and resources to help anyone in the world get closer to God. Our first immediate goal is to get a hundred million people into heaven. So when we say we're hiring, understand this. We're not looking for employees. We're looking for mission driven A players that want to change the world. Our criteria is simple. Don't show us what you could do. Show us what you've already mastered. Like if you want to be the short form editor, show me the millions of views you've gotten on short form. If you want to be the podcast producer, show me the shows that you've successfully produced. We've learned the hard way not to hire off potential. We just want to hire off of peer experience, people who have already proven that they can perform at their skillset at the highest level. We have jobs available in many different departments, media and content, live events, and marketing. We also have remote jobs and LA based jobs available. If you're an A player that has mastered their craft and wants to do something that glorifies God, then please head to the link in our
description and check out the job board. And lastly, if you're an absolute beast at something and you don't see it on the job board, please reach out. I mean, you know, you might be able to do it for us. It might work out. So if you're amazing at something, you don't see the perfect job description, just reach out, tell us what you're good at. Maybe it'll work. Genuinely. I can't do this without a team. So I'm very thankful for anyone who supports the mission. I look forward to hearing from you guys. Right. Why would you expect to be good? Yeah. You've never listened to, you've never been good at doing this in your life or whatever, why would you expect it now? It's like, you think you're good. And it was even a deeper lesson where it's like, he, he would say like the sermon and it finally clicked to me. A lot of people, they fail in life, but then when they get to church, they somehow feel like they have a clean slate and they can do really good. But underneath that is pride, right? It's like, oh, now I have a new life. I can be a better Christian when I couldn't even be like a, a, a good evil person, right, basically. Like I just sucked at everything. So it's like, he's like, those people don't realize that that's kind of rooted in pride. It's not wrong to want to do good.
He's not saying that it's bad to like do good. He's saying like, if you try your best to do good, then what happens is you become self-dependent and self-reliant. And the whole point of Christianity is to rely on Jesus. So like in this way, it's a point, it poisons the well, because you're sitting there and you're like, okay, I know I'm saved by Jesus, but now I have to like act like him. I have to pray like him. I have to do everything like him. And then you're actually assuming his role, basically. Like, then what do you have to do with him essentially? And so from that little bit, he was showing me such a deep lesson here, which is kind of difficult to grasp, especially for new, new believers. But as you walk it, you're like, dude, that's so true. So many times I depended on myself and I just put like Jesus into it. Oh, Jesus will let me do this. But like in my heart, it was like, I wanted to go that way. I wanted to like, take care of myself. I wanted to control the outcomes, but I would slap the label of holy spirit led me, or God said this, or the Bible said this, but in my heart underneath was like, nah, I want that though. So what would you have done in that situation? Like, let's say you're sleepy again, just keep sleeping. Yeah. Yeah. So it was weird after that happened, I stopped getting sleepy at church. Right. I was like, I mean, unless I'm extremely exhausted and I'm really, really tired. Like yesterday I was, I had like seven dreams, eight dreams back to back to back. And today in the meeting, I was just yawning.
And then Jeremy was like, oh, am I boring? It's like, no, I'm actually tired. But yeah. So other than that though, I wouldn't, I wouldn't, I'd stopped falling asleep because I realized I'm not a good person. And that's how the word enters. It says when people were ungodly, Christ died for the ungodly. The woman who's sitting there caught in the act of adultery is not looking for Jesus. But then when Jesus like gives her the antidote, like, Hey, this is who I am. She like perked her heart and perked her ears. It was like, oh shoot. No one condemned me. Like you don't either. Whoa. Like it was different versus someone who's like, I need to find Jesus everywhere. I need to download him. I need to download him. That then it turns like almost into like, you're chasing dopamine in a way, you know? So yeah. Not a treasure hunt. Yeah. Seriously. It's such a strange balance. Cause it's like, it's like, you don't try, you try and just accept, but fall asleep at church, just go to sleep. But then the pastor be like, Hey, why are you sleeping? You should pay attention. You know what I'm saying?
It's like a, but a lot of that is posture checking too. Yeah. Like I realized that a good pastor will always look at your heart and be like, you're dirt. And I'm just like, okay. You know, whereas before I'm like, what do you mean? I didn't even do anything wrong. Like, what are you talking about? Why am I, I know I'm dirt and it's, it's so different. Even though like, I know I'm dirt. If you say it with like a different heart, the words are the same, but the heart is different behind it. I know. Yeah. I know I'm dirt pastor. Thank you. Versus I know I'm dirt. Why are you telling me that? It's the same thing, but it's, we'll look at the heart posture though. Right. Right. Yeah. I guess it's, it's, I guess you feel bad. Cause it's like, I'm trying to make an effort, but then he's saying like. Don't make the effort. All right. Yeah, but then it's like true submission is like don't trip Yeah, if you're tripping about the submission or whatever part then you're not submitted. It's like yeah, look I am It's like now you're tripping you're tripping about it though. Yeah, so you were never submitted No, no, you gotta like Accepting that you can't do anything and that's when they can enter It's like because when you when you keep trying you get in your own way
I forgot I think you said it but it was like someone said it was like like a dog trying to get a Stick through a door. It's like you can't take it with you. It's like once you leave it you can get through the door It's just strange. I'm sorry. My brain goes there here, but it's like it's just strange cuz it's like That wouldn't work in a work workplace. If you're just like that I just suck But it is working in our in a workplace, I think we're proof of that Yeah, and it's like well, I don't want to name names of the people that Well, let's not go there Yeah, you shouldn't go there. You're always trying to fight people Jeremy. No, I'm not trying to fight you guys I'm just saying like there's like yeah tasks that have to get done And if they're not done, then it's like and what if they're just okay That's what I'm saying. If they were surrendered the tasks would get done Like if you sat there and was like, hey, bro, why aren't you doing it? They wouldn't go. Well, I'm trying they would go Huh? Okay. I need to realign my heart now. I need to do it do whatever I have to do It's not like what the hell I am doing it, bro. What are you talking about? And then that heart becomes like very calloused Yeah, I'm not saying it's it's wrong to tell we go through that all the time. It's like well Is it fair to say this this and this and we have dialogue, right? But it's like there are certain people who just don't work. Yeah, and they think like I deserve everything and it's like bro But why though? Well because look at me. I'm here. I showed up. It's like yeah, but that's not your heart It's not that you showed up that we're worried about it's your heart right now. You're not willing to back down We're willing to tell you and walk we handhold crazy in this company so many times and like we're walking But then people they can't get that through their head. Like they're like what you're supposed to do that It's like no, like you have to understand we're giving you grace, but you also have to see the grace and be like, oh, okay Maybe I should be thankful. Maybe I should think about other people. That's the issue. That's the issue clicked Yeah, like if someone's not getting something done at work There's the reason why it's usually not because oh, I'm cuz these guys suck. I'm gonna do this It's like there's some other not the reason that they haven't submitted to that's keeping them from being able to do it And it could be their own Issues to of like I I don't feel like I need to do this or I or I can sneak by these people dude It's literally just I'm good. Like that's the it's to dumb it down as simple. It's like I'm good So whatever I think and feel is gonna be that like that's that's what's gonna motivate me is I'm a good person
So yeah, if I slack off if I don't take notes, that's okay because I can do that Like this is this is the issue with like people who don't follow things. They're just really good We we have we know we know there's people in our company who we had to like kind of cut no disrespect to any of them but we there's hearts of just like I'm a good person and I I know what I know and I do things well, and if you guys tell me to do something, I don't agree with that Like I'm doing what I'm doing and I'm doing my best and it's like but that's that's the heart of goodness Versus dang. I'm lucky to be at this company I'm not as good as what I think I am those people work the best Because they're sitting there and they can be guided they can be like like molded and be like yo I understand like I get what you're saying, you know what I mean? So, yeah, right and you're just always a student You're never like too far like it's okay to be you can be a good person But then you just have to accept the struggles that come with it It's like you always struggle to your to your own goodness, but that's why I think we're also so hard on ourselves right is because people are they have this expectation of like I'm good and That they need a fixed thing So my example why I was so hard on myself in my life and perfectionist is I need I feel like I need to fix myself when truthfully like I need to receive grace to even receive the fixing and receive the word and like You know, there's times where pastor will say something and I just know there's like a rock in my heart where I'm like I know he's right, but I don't want to bend. There's that thing where it's like I know I'm being stubborn at that time, right? And so when I can't meet that because I'm good and I expect that of myself and I couldn't meet it That's when pain comes so it's not pastor telling me sleep or don't sleep. It's more of like bro. You're not good But that's the pain. It's like damn Because I didn't listen to you or I try to listen to him and I didn't listen to him now I can't meet my own expectation of being good. Then the pain flows out of that. Does does that make sense? Yeah, right and so it's it was painful for me to acknowledge that I was weak Because no one's gonna be like hey guys. Yeah, I'm weak I'm not qualified like nobody wants that the system of the world is you have to like be strong
You have to be motivated you have to be good, right? But what pastor was saying was Johnny God allows all weakness to you So that it strips all of the glory away from you because if I'm super weak and I can't do anything Then when I do start to do things in a Christian mindset, it all points to God basically Oh, this kid was carrying a gun. This kid was a gang member. Why is he talking about God now, dude? It's not him. It has to be God Like so the weakness is there as a like almost like a forming field in a construction site If you will that points and builds like glory for God essentially That's why he used all of these weak people in the Bible Moses was weak Abraham pimped out his wife I mean two times by the way King David, you know did some evil things Kill people Saul who turned into Paul was literally persecuting Christians. It was crazy so he always uses the The worst people and so what pastor was teaching me was Johnny You're not designed and no one here is designed to repair themselves. That's why we need a Savior we need a fixer and that fixer is God and so, you know, but again Satan also planted in my heart a lot like I would say Satan hates weakness Which is crazy right like you would think like wait what he hates people who are weak actually Because if a person is truly weak Then they have to depend on God So what he does is he boosts you up to be strong with pride with your unlocks with your like You know ego and to think that you're actually amazing so that you could never depend on God When is it someone's weakness versus them not taking simple accountability, right? like someone could be like You know imagine like a little kid like I can't tie my shoes. I can't tie my shoes it's like you could tie your shoes and the parents just kind of like tie your shoes and they eventually figure it out or an Adult being like, oh, I'm so weak. I can't like Yeah, I'm succumbing. I can't read the Bible or whatever it is It's like yeah Well, you you choose to wake up and pick up the blunt or one doom scroll or whatever it is
so I'll give you an example right like Weakness if someone is truly broken in spirit and weak they will literally Not trust themselves because they're weak. They're not they have they cannot depend on themselves So back then pastor Kim would say something crazy. He goes all of you ministers all of you pastors here we would have the early morning service and a lot of us would stumble in late and He would be like so we would have the minister service before the early morning service So we'd have to get up at 4 it would start at 4 30 to 5 30 We'd chill for 30 minutes and then it starts at 6 to Whatever for their morning service for the brothers and sisters. So we have a service before the morning service It's like the morning early early morning service and I would always be late to it and he would check me bad He would be like, you know, you know brother Johnny the reason why he's he's late. It's not because he's weak It's because he's strong and I'm just like what the heck he's like It's because he's so strong. He doesn't need the Word of God. That's what he said He's like the thing about me is that I know I have a congregation. I handle all of the West Coast pastors I'm not able to even like control my own life How can I guide 50 other pastors from the West Coast to then guide their lives in their congregation? So, what do I do? I don't trust myself to sleep in I wake up and search God and the scripture for the answers that and I was like, dang, that's so true He's like you guys. However that are coming in late. You guys are fine. You guys don't need I'll sleep in It'll be good. Like I can still run my congregation I don't need to go to the Bible and search for answers and that like clicked to me it made me realize like dude, I'm literally a person who I Cannot like I don't depend on God I depend on myself and he even says something crazy If you use your alarm clock to wake up, you're corrupted. I was like, hey, right again He's like because you don't have a sense of urgency to change it's you don't if you're truly use analogy of like like someone who's who has cancer or someone who's sick a Person who's like, you know, maybe he has the flu will rest up and it's not really life-threatening so kind of like relax, you know, and they won't really go to the doctor, but who goes to the doctor, a person who has cancer, who's like, I'm going to die.
Like, it doesn't matter what I do. Like I have to go and get this chemotherapy. I literally, if I don't, I'm going to die. Right. Normal people, not stubborn, like just regular normal people. So in the same way, he's like, you guys are all like have sin inside of you, but to you, it's not even an issue. That's why you don't go to God. You don't go to the hospital. You don't go to the Bible. You're just like, yeah, I'm tired. You know? And you, and, and he was, he was a lot of analogies. He's like, it's kind of like a person walking, right? There's, there's kids who play with the Walker, like at our church, we have like some brothers who are very old and they have walkers cause they cannot walk. And so the kids will kind of like walk and, and, and play with it. And he goes, but when things come down to it, let's say like it inconveniences them, then they just throw the Walker aside and they just walk normally. However, even under inconvenience, even under like pressure, even if they want to walk faster, if they're, if there's truly sick, they rely on that Walker. They don't just throw it away. Right. In the same way, you guys are like those kids who are using the Walker as a Bible. Oh, it's fun until it's not. And you just toss it away. And I was like, dang. So he was showing me like my heart, like you're not weak, Johnny. You're actually in your heart. You're very strong.
A weak person surrenders. A weak person gets boo-bopped and like laid out and that's it. They don't like try to fight back. Like they will be like, I can't do it. And they just give up. You guys are not giving up. You think you're weak, he says, but you're not actually weak. And I'm just like, oh my gosh, that concept was very difficult to understand. But when he used the analogies to explain it, I was like, huh? Okay. So to answer your question, a person who's truly weak, you'll see like they just give up. I see that in our congregations where they're just like, I don't date anymore. Why? Not because I don't want to, but I know like, I don't choose the right people. So then they give it up to pastor and they get married and pastor chooses for them. And then their people are like, that's a cult because they don't understand. Like they don't understand submission. They still think I can choose people. We had, I was on a podcast with you and there was a guy who was like, why would we, you know, he's one of your co-hosts. And he was like, why would we go in? You know, why would we let these random people choose and arrange our marriages? And then I literally asked one question. How's it working out for you? You choosing your partners? He's like, dang roasted. Like literally he's like, not good, bro. I was like, right. But see, there's a mindset of like, even though he's messing up, he's like, what? I still choose better. Like if you do that.
Yeah. You're not weak. You're strong. You're not surrendered. You're just going to be like, oh, that's cool. Yeah. I messed up here and there, but I don't think I'm fully messed up. So yeah, that's so true. Wait, so are you saying it's cool to be weak? Yes. Literally second Corinthians 12, nine. I know that's crazy, but it tells you, I will boast in my iniquities for when I am weak, then I am strong. God's grace is sufficient. So in order for us to receive grace, we have to be weak. If you, if you can work for something, you don't need grace. That's wages. You go, okay. I'd put in X amount of hours. You give me $4,000. Like that's a, that's a trade. Grace is I suck, but you still gave it to me. Thank you. Right. So grace is, is unmerited. It's something that you don't deserve. And yet God gives that to us. And this is how God works in everything in Christianity. It's all about grace. So I felt a little guilty when you're saying that because it's like, I don't want an arranged marriage. So what should I do if I have those feelings?
Yeah. You're not weak. That's the whole point. Like I know, I know. But so, but so, but now I feel so you should listen to the episode on receptive skin. No, no, no. But what I'm saying is, am I now a bad, I'm now, I'm now the strong to me strong in this context. Strong means you're stubborn, right? You're stubborn. You're stubborn. Just means you think you can do something. So even this question, I'll unpack it for you. Watch. You think like, why do you feel guilty? Because you think you can stop doing that. You think that if you sat there, you can somehow submit to pastor. But if you just acknowledge that you didn't, you can't submit to him and you'd be like, I like big booty Latinas. Then that's just what it is. Hey, don't forget you're projecting. I never, ever said my preference. You did many times. No, but it was, you were projecting. Continue. No, you're, you're about to click it for me. It's about to make sense. Yeah. So again, so if you sit there and you're like, I feel guilty, condemnation only comes to people who are good. So I'm a good person. I think I can do it. Dang.
I should be more surrendered. That's what you're thinking. Dang. I'm not. can allow pastor. I would never allow him to do that. Oh my gosh. So right there, you start to think, am I not submitted to pastor? Bro, you were never submitted to pastor. If you just acknowledge that, then you're like, oh yeah, I'm a piece of garbage. But then I guess I I'm a piece of garbage. No, you're not. Another question. I'm a piece of garbage, but I have multiple garbage questions for the audience. Here, I'll unpack your question for you. You don't even know what I'm going to say, but go for it. Well, no, I want to unpack your previous question by asking you some more questions. Why, why, why wouldn't you want an arranged marriage? What do you think is wrong or like bad? Huh? It's crazy. Hey, can we, cause there's no baddies in the church. That's so mean. That's not what I was thinking. There are baddies. There's spiritual baddies in their heart. Shame on you. Shame on you. You're projecting again. I've never said this. You're projecting again. That's such a win. Like you're projecting. Everything is just, you're projecting. Take, it could be the marriage topic. It could be a certain things where I'm just kind of like, all right, I'm a piece of garbage. So, so then just walk around as a piece of garbage, I guess. No, that's what you walk around and you depend on God. I'm a piece of garbage. That's why I have to depend on God. Do you understand Jeremy? I understand. Does it make sense? It doesn't make sense. But are you comfortable being the piece of garbage?
I'm just, I am comfortable being the piece of garbage, but it also makes me, I'm kind of like, huh. Okay. Yeah. But because you're a piece of garbage, that's why God loves you. Right. And he saved you. We don't deserve anything. So we don't guys don't think I'm negative self-talking people to just be like, I'm a piece of garbage walking around. Like, no, I'm saying when you acknowledge that and you realize then it opens your mind to realize how much you depend on God and need to depend on God and how much that you don't do anything for God, but he does everything for you. Then it replaces the heart and you start to have a heart of gold, not garbage. You start to go, wow. Although I'm flawed, God doesn't throw me away. I'm truly weak and I think I'm strong and God doesn't check me like that. He literally supports me. And in this way, that's what nurtures you to then overcome the fact that you're strong and you acknowledge that you're weak. So it goes back and forth in this way. I a hundred percent get it. I promise. I a hundred percent. Why are you looking at me like that? You don't think I get it? You're projecting. But you're giving me that face. Be honest. What is laughing? I can't smile. Get anything. No, no, no. I understand the concept. I'm just saying it's difficult for me to apply because yeah, I think I'm a good person. So exactly. So it's, it's important to change. It's important to be a good person, guys. I'm not saying it's not, but again, like when you don't reach that expectation, you don't beat yourself up for it. You acknowledge, Oh, this is where I need help. And that's okay. Like people get to this position where they start to mask. Oh, I'm a good person. Oh, I've just got exposed. Oh, now I need to start. And then the line comes in the manipulation. Now if you just acknowledge who you are at the end of the day, you just grow.
Not everyone is perfect. Not every, everyone has some kind of shortcoming, some kind of lacking, some kind of weakness. And that's okay. Acceptance is the literal antidote to weaknesses. Cause if someone sits there and they're just like, you're a criminal and I don't think I am, I'm going to be like, no, I'm reformed. I studied the Bible, but like, it's a point, it's a position of like I'm coming from fear and I'm scared, right. Of like getting exposed. But if I'm like, yeah, you're, you're a criminal. Yeah. What happens then? Nothing, nothing happens. You're like, okay, cool. And it draws a line. And actually some people would be like, whoa, this person is actually being honest. Like, yeah, he's a person who sucks. Like I respect that. James Sexton, we just had him on our pod. I super respect the fact that he was like, there's just something that's missing for me. And I don't have that faith like that. I I'm too analytical. I'm too logical and maybe to my fault, but I, I'm not going to fake it. And we had a beautiful conversation. It wasn't like you need to stop distrusting you. You need to distrust your thoughts. I didn't even have to tell him you're too strong. I was just like, I'm going to pray for you, bro. Cause he acknowledges that about himself that he's a little too strong. He acknowledges that he chases that dragon of people validating him. What's wrong with that? Right? be wrong if we ridiculed him for that because he's being vulnerable about that. He's being honest about that. So people want honesty, but they don't want you to be that honest. And then it's like, so then it's a lose, lose. Okay.
I want to be super honest, but like, no, you can't be. Cause I'll judge you for it. Okay. But then if I don't tell you, then I'm closed minded and I'm, I'm a liar. It's like, where, where's the balance here? Right. So for me, I I'm, I'm able to see people like that and just acknowledge like, Whoa, like he acknowledged himself. I saw a lot of similarities, like, man, yeah, I struggle with this. I struggle with that. And I acknowledge that about myself. And that's why I can't depend on myself. I then go to God. Would you then say it's good for somebody to publicly talk about their weaknesses or publicly talk about their, what's strong about stubborn about them? I don't think so. I think it depends on the people, right? So like, because sometimes what you're saying can trigger other people too. And at the end of the day, like truth, it shouldn't be like, it should be for restoration. So there's a lot of people that aren't okay with certain things or are ready for the truth. And they don't even realize that, but there's kind of a dilemma because people want the truth and you only find out you're not ready for it after you find out the truth, right? Like you don't ever know I'm not ready. You, a lot of people think I can handle that truth. I'll give an example. There's people that I mentor that are in relationships and they always ask that silver, like that, that question of that magic question.
That's like, how many people did you sleep with? Who, how was your ex? Like, they think that they could take it because they're asking that. And as soon as those things come out, bro, you don't know how many people come to me and start having retroactive jealousy, you know, waking up in the middle of the night, like, was he bigger than me? And it's just like, you're just like, what the heck, bro? He's 10, like 10 years ago, 10 years ago, 10 years ago. Oh, I almost, I started cold sweating. The AC on in here, that's not even a real thing. That must be made up 10 years ago. Phew. I was like, 10, one. That was crazy. But, but you know, things like that, where it's, it's, it's. People think they want the truth, but they don't. Right. And at the end of the day, we're also taught about that too. In our churches where it's like, people are not ready. Are y'all ready to have that conversation? A lot of people aren't. Then how do you, okay. So we're dating, you're a woman, I'm a man. And it's like, you're trying to be, how do I approach, how do I approach you? If I'm like, I do kind of want to get something off my chest and I'm not sure if you're ready for it or vice versa, you're like, Hey, we should both probably talk about certain things. But is it for restoration? That's all you have to think. Are you going to wait and find out?
If you told me the 10 thing, I would literally jump out the window. But it's simple. It's simple. Like, what does that have to do with anything? Somebody's past? Let's say, what does that have to do with anything? It doesn't. Right. Rather, if you're sitting there and you look at someone and you go, you know what? Go ahead. Because I'm trying to vet, let's say it's like, do I want to take this relationship further? Is there like your past sometimes can, can help the other person determine your character in certain things. Right. If I, if it was like, let's say, let's say it was like, yeah, like honestly, like I went into severe credit card debt multiple times and I really struggled my finances. For me, I'd be like, okay, that's something I'm going to be careful about. I'm not, I'm not going to, we're not going to just spend willy nilly. I'm going to draw the boundaries sometimes if you use my credit card. That's fine. Yeah. I think again, for restoration, meaning we can sit there and we can, you know, work on something that plans a few, cause that, that is to help your future. You can't be with somebody who's bad with their money and just runs up their credit cards and has horrible credit. Right. Like you also have to be like, that's fair to be like, Hey, but let's say that person using this example is still struggling with that.
Oh man. I do struggle with like splurging. Right. And you know that they're struggling. I don't think it will be smart to be like, Hey, stop splurging. Obviously they have an issue. They've tried not to, it doesn't really help. So how would you, in this way, the question would not be tell them the truth and then stop them from that. The question is how do I restore this person without actually like hurting them? Can I sit there and have a conversation? And if you can't get past that, then it's not going to work. What about something that a lot of people hold inside of like porn addiction? It's like, okay, I'm not cheating on you. I'm not, but it like, yeah, it could make the other person super insecure. But you're trying to share with them so you could be like help me through this Yeah, but like how do you know like that could ruin that? Well, that would be up to the porn addicted person to be like got it Dang, like I don't think I think that would this would hurt her. I could take that risk Yeah, it's a risk you could but I don't I wouldn't tell them about it personally I would be like look you go to God about it more than anything guys telling others You should confess to God right like Lord. This is what it is. Give me guidance Is this going to restore us because bro? I know people who were like porn addicted had a great Great marriages even and they get divorced as soon as they open up because people are like again Wow, thank you for telling me, but I don't want someone like you that's straight-up cheating on me and they they have this callous now and When they explain to me how that person is because they don't know how to read heart posture I'm like bro. I would have never said that to that person I would have never said that to that like respectfully
I I know that you want to open up, but that's why good people do this Well, I need to tell them the truth because I'm good But you're actually ruining things versus if you're like, I'm gonna I have faith that I'll get over this myself I don't think she's gonna really have to help me. I think it would be worse Let me go to God instead of going to her But they have this heart posture of like if I don't tell her then I'm an evil person now, bro Whether you tell her or not, you're an evil person. That's what they don't understand That's why I'm saying you have to acknowledge yourself truly in the Bible not oh, I feel bad. So let me tell them It's like you're only doing that to pacify yourself though. If that's the case. Does that does that make sense? Right, right is when you say go to God, right? A lot of people will sit there and I've been this person to where you're like, I'm praying I'm praying and you don't really feel Like change is happening, right? is it Should you share everything with your pastor? I Think you should I think I think Let me rephrase that. I think you should share everything with God. Why are you laughing? But it's like pastor. I just I can't stop gooning all day all night. I'm just masturbating too much. Thank you so much pastor Socks are crunching as he's walking away. Thank you But Yeah, should you go to your pastor with all that I don't think you have to I think you should go to him when it Comes for guidance. Obviously, I was taught to do that But many times you have to go to God about these things too, you know But every time I did go to pastor, I realized my pastor who was gospel-centered never condemned me I've told him a gang of stuff bro a gang of stuff. Am I am I what did I condemn you or something? I'm just never condemned. No, no, I'm lat. No, I'm laughing at all the crazy things. You've probably told I know Tell me that you told pastor. I'm like, I don't care man You're gonna do he gonna deal with me. I'm like no sir knows what that is Yeah, so many times like he's a real one dude. Sometimes I have to explain things to him
Okay, so the pastor this is what it is. They have to do this and he's like, why do they have to do that? You just do Go into detail But I sit there and I'm like Like there's things where I don't tell pastor every single what I do actually tell them every single thing But there was a time where I didn't and I was like, you know what? I Have to go to God about this And I think that's more important than anything because look there are people out there I know who are like, but I went and I told my pastor and I got exiled. Yeah that happens. But again guys That's why it's so important to see a pastor acknowledge his weaknesses and then also acknowledge the gospel a Pat it goes hand in hand people who believe in the gospel are weak Why because the gospel is not for the perfect people. It's for the weak people so they would believe in that That's why a lot a lot of people they're legalistic, you know, and I'm not trying to be disrespectful, but it's true If you go to a pass and you talk about certain things like oh, yeah, you know, I got this girl pregnant Are you married? No. Oh like they start doing this. It's so bad. I would not go to people like that I wouldn't even go to that church. That's not skirting accountability. That's bringing you into condemnation. That is pride literally masked as Discernment and telling you, you know Conviction when it's really condemnation. So I genuinely believe like yes you should go to pastor if the pastor is gospel center number one or If they're not you should go to God either way gospel center or not go to God first That's the most important thing and I've done that where I'm like God God, if this is not what you want, please remove it. Bro, literally removes it. God will remove these things. If I'm like, man, I don't know how to deal with it, I go to, transparently, I go to God about the core of the heart all the time, whether it's brothers and sisters,
whether it's our internal team. Like, literally, I go to God 24-7 about it and things always work themselves out. Always work, I'm like, God, please, please, please make Jeremy not gay. And it worked! It worked! Hey, one day you're gonna pray for God to remove me and then I'll be gone and then you're gonna regret it. No, don't do that, don't say that. Give us an example or maybe teach people out there how to go to God. So a lot of people think going to God is, I need to be polished and have this perfect prayer and articulate every single issue that I have to God. God is omnipotent. He knows everything all the time, is everywhere all the time. He knew when you were there committing your sins. And so it's not about going to God correctly, it's going to God honestly. And when you go to God honestly, then you're able to kind of share your heart and it realigns you too. People think going to God is to have him fix certain things. No, it's to realign with him everything. Hey, Lord, I don't know if I'm walking crooked. God, can you please show me like if I'm doing that? And if I'm not, also show me that. And if you do show me and I don't see it,
then Lord, please also help me with that as well, right? It's like, there's so many intricate details, but you guys should be praying for everything. We always take the biggest burdens to God, but it starts with the little burdens too. It starts with releasing the smallest things to him. You know, Lord, I was a little frustrated today. Do you feel like that was okay? What do you think about it? Going to God is always, what do you think about it? Not what can you do for me? Do you legit, like you'll straight up like... Bro, I'll give you examples. Yeah, yeah. I do that every single day. Every single day. Man, we're giving you that much of a hard time? All the time, dude. It's a guy who's first name starts with J and first letter of his last name starts with K. And this guy, man, he's always, always stressing me out. No, I'm just kidding. I'm totally kidding. No, what I do is I pray. Like, I'll go to God and I'll pray for, you know, you guys. And I'll be like, Lord, please help me be a good leader. And if you don't allow me to be a good leader, don't let me miss the lesson in that. Like, why wouldn't you? Because you could snap your fingers
and make me a good leader. But if I mess up on certain things, I don't wanna do just good. I wanna learn the lesson that you're trying to teach me through all of this. Please don't let me miss that lesson because that's valuable. Like, I don't wanna like just gain something and be like, wow, shiny object. Like, forget you, God. In all things, don't let me like forget you, right? I go all the time about this. When I stress out about my brother still being kind of like, you know, in the hoods, in the street life and stuff. And he's changed his heart recently. In the early phases where my brother did receive salvation, but in my heart, I was like, dang, he's not living the spiritual life that we need to, or he needs to. I wouldn't go and be like, oh, hurt my brother, change him. It was more like, hey, Lord, there's a way that I see my brother. I don't know if it's aligned with you. Lord, if it is, God, can you either show me that it's aligned? And if it is misaligned, please show me that it is and then you take care of it for me. Because that's not my brother, that's your son. So please don't give me the heart to judge my brother.
Rather, allow me to guide him. If that's my job, please allow me to guide him. You see the difference? It's not like, Lord, please fix my brother. Okay, he's struggling with this. Please don't let him vape anymore. Please don't, I don't do that. It's more of like, obviously, God, you're letting him do these things. I know there's free will involved, obviously, but at the same time, there's a lot of times where you didn't give me my free will, where you were literally like, you're going here, I need to change that, and you just did it. So if that's the case, Lord, please also help my brother with that. And man, has he worked on my brother. My brother's like quoting scripture now back to me, and I'm like, plagiarism. Because he literally will take what I say. Oh, you wrote the Bible? No, he'll sit there and watch our things, and he'll say the little lines and stuff like that. You know, he's like, why are people begging for forgiveness instead of trusting the one that bled for forgiveness? And I'm like, I wonder who said that? Hey, I know you ain't Googling that. If you love biblical lessons like this, then you would love my weekly Bible class. Bible class brings clarity, community, and consistency.
There are a lot of us who read the Bible, but we don't know how to apply that to our lives. Consistency also, a lot of you guys want to read the Bible, and you don't know where to start. how to start and therefore it kind of discourages you guys to read the Bible. So every week on Saturdays at 10 a.m. Pacific Standard Time we go through one chapter and we break down every single verse and apply those verses to your life. And after the Bible class we also do a group mentor session where it's you can ask me customized questions and anything about the class and anything about your own life. If this sounds interesting to you, you guys can check the link in the bio and use code WISDOM to get 50% off your first month. See you guys this Saturday at 10 a.m. Pacific Standard Time. What should someone do if the prayers aren't working at all? Dude, they're working. But what... Well, are you sure? Well, that's what... I'm like trying to add. Yeah, you're like, well, that's the thing. Well, I'm just curious like if you're going to God about someone else's weaknesses, are you praying for someone else's weaknesses or are you praying for your own alignment with just... It's both, right? So it's always a two piece meal, right? It's a two pack... Two piece. Yeah, two piece combo. Lord, I see weaknesses in them. If you want to help them, please help them. But also if that's not the case, if that's not a weakness and I'm misjudging or that's a weakness that you're allowing as a thorn to like push you back to push them back to you, God also then give me the heart too to realign with them, right? So it's both ways. It's not always just like change him. People always pray, change this person, change this person. My mom prayed like
modeled that prayer for years and then nothing changed. When she started to realize, hey, Lord, change me, change my heart and obviously like let me have faith in that whatever you're doing with Johnny is exactly what you need to be doing. I'm his mom and yes, I have this pride. She started to pray like I have this pride that I know what's best for my son. But Lord, you know what's best for my son. So like please allow me to align with that. Honestly, I think she prayed that a couple times and it just clicked. It worked. And so it's really just praying for alignment, guys. People are praying too much for like health and wealth. And yes, add that in. If you want the hack, though, it's, hey, Lord, I don't know. I don't know what to do. And there's times where I feel callous even praying like that because I know it's the enemy. Like I'll be driving and I'm like, OK, God, like I know I shouldn't do that. And I'm like, no, but wait, Lord, I don't know what my heart is. And you've told me already my heart is deceitful. So even if I'm praying for alignment, Lord, only you know what alignment actually is. So, God, can you please help me with that? And if you are helping me, please allow me to see it. And if you don't want me to see it also, then allow me to accept that. Then you have to see everything routes back to him versus like, oh, I need to do this. And I please give me a million dollars so we can build churches. It's like, sure, give me wisdom and patience. Give me wisdom. Right. Give me wisdom and patience. Give me still help me overcome this lust. Sure. Add those things into the regimen. But overall, the message has to be, God, I accept it. I accept whatever it is. And if I don't, you help me accept it. And if I I see it and if I don't, you help me see it. Lord, what do you think about this? It's literally adding him into everything and depending on him for everything. OK, so, yeah. So I have a co-worker who struggles with weakness. I mean, they're super weak, like they really struggle with weakness, like a really close co-worker of mine. And I guess I just had a question for them if they were listening. And this is really more for them. But I was in front of a mirror for sure. But no, like so are you or is it OK to want to overcome your weaknesses or are you supposed to submit to them and pray for alignment and
listen up? It is important to overcome, but not in the way that most people think. Right. So overcoming weakness is beautiful. It's amazing. It feels great. But it's also dangerous because later you literally strip away. I've seen so many people strip it away from God. Like I overcame. Yes, Lord. I was obedient. Yes, Lord. I prayed and I fasted. And all you hear is I. Of course, they're adding God. But like sometimes God allows you to overcome your weakness to show you how weak you truly are. Right. It's like you thought that this was where your weakness is. No, I use the weakness to show you a greater picture of how wicked your heart is in that when you overcome it, you think it's all you. That is the real weakness. Do you guys understand what I'm saying? So. The issue with that overcoming things is that you become self-reliant, self-sufficient, and you don't really need God after that. Me for sure. Me too. All of us are this way. Right. If you kick. Aaron, if you kick the, uh, an addiction, let's say, you're literally going to be like, it was me who did that. You're not going to sit there and go, Oh wow, God, thank you so much. Like you may, but then later it's like, Oh, that's happened before. I can just kick this addiction and this addiction, like it becomes, it puts you in the driver's seat. It, this happened so much to me early on where a pastor would literally tell me like, do you really think you overcame it? And I'm like, huh? He used the story of the man caught the man in the, uh, infirmity for 38 years is a man who was paralyzed for 38 years. And Jesus meets him and he says, wilt thou be made whole again? Do you want to be healed? Basically? And he goes, yes. But when I go to the pool, there's no one that's going to help me. And if I step in there already before me and he goes, so yes, I want to be made
whole, but no one's going to help me. And then Jesus says something really peculiar. He goes, rise, take up your bed and walk. Why didn't he just say, rise and walk? Why take up your bed? Your, that bed is filthy. It's been 38 years. He's been taking it with him. He probably peed on it. He's pooped on it. Like there's all kinds of stuff, but he's saying, take it up like over your shoulder and walk basically to be like, yo, look guys, this is where I came from and never forget that part. Because once he walks by himself, then he's going to think, well, I can run now and I can do this and wow, I got my whole life back. It's been 38 years, but I got it back now. And we start to lose sight of God. Whereas he's like, do you remember where you were? You were in the mud like this in that nasty bed, carry that with you, frame that with you in your mind and move forward. Pastor Kim says something to me that was such a bar. He said, Johnny, although you've gotten out of prison, you need to always keep one of those bars in your heart. And I'm like, huh? Like a prison bar in your heart that you're only a gang member, that you're only this prisoner, and that's, what's going to keep you humble that when you reach new heights. Now he was saying this years ago, before I was famous and all that, he was like, God's going to use you, but you don't, you cannot forget where you came from, you cannot forget that.
And so sometimes God allows people to overcome their weaknesses, to show how truly wicked and weak they are and, and in believing in themselves that they can overcome these weaknesses. So to summarize what you said, it's okay to overcome your weakness if it was through the grace of God. It's not necessarily okay to chase overcoming your weakness and constantly be fighting for that for yourself as if you could ever change that in the first place. Right. And God is more because we want to overcome weakness. Why? Because we want to feel strong, like flat out. That's what it is. And whether it's strong in our obedience, strong in our faith, we want to weakness, the opposite of weakness is strength. We want to show somehow that we were strong, whether we're, we're obedient with God and that strength and all these things, but when God is more interested in how you trust him versus your strength, right? A lot of people want to flex to God, how strong they are. God is the strongest almighty person. He wants us to see how weak we are so that he can become our pillar, become our strength, become our stronghold. The issue is people think like, no, I need to overcome these things. And then at the end of the day, they literally become self-sufficient. I've seen it so many times. Christians are like, man, I was win after win after win. And now, bro, I just feel like distant from God. I don't understand why I'm going through these things. There's a hot take here too, right? Like if you're sometimes the Bible says you have to boast in your weaknesses.
So Paul had a weakness, a thorn on his side, and he had it until he died. He went to God three times about it and God didn't fix it for him. But because of that, he was dependent on God, right? So it came from a perspective. It shifted my, my mindset when I read second Corinthians chapter 12, because I'm like, man, who would be happy about their weaknesses, but he's not happy about his weakness, he's happy that that weakness keeps him dependent on God. And so that is something that I've learned too, where I'm like, man, I do struggle with whether whatever men struggle with pride, ego, anger, lust. Most men struggle with these things, but that's the exact reason why I can't trust myself and I have to surrender daily to God to be like, Hey Lord, please help me with everything. And so this is actually almost like your door to meet God is when your weakness is the door to meet God. I guess a lot of times we tell people, um, that they're looking to live like a spiritual life of peace and happiness. If there's a version, is there a version where you don't struggle with everything, you do reach true peace and happiness, but then how do you stay connected with God? If that's the pillar is your struggle. So there is a, um, you get to a point where you're very thankful that you don't struggle and you become hypersensitive to when you did struggle. Ooh, right. So it's like. Oh, I remember I used to struggle with this and I don't. Then the happiness comes and you're pushing it back to God, right? And that's happened with all of us, I think. Where we're like, dude, I remember the airport situation. Where you sat there and you just had airport anxiety. And you're like, don't trust your thoughts.
And right there, it helped you. Literally pulled you out of it, right? I've seen Jeremy multiple times. Myself too. Where I'm just like, I overlook it. But I'm like, yo, I used to trip about this. Like if I didn't have control of this. And how come now I'm just like, yeah, that's fine. I was big on wishy-washy things. So like if people say something and we have a contract. Like we have a verbal agreement and then someone flips it for whatever reason. I'll flip. I was crazy like that. And I'll be like, what? But you said you were going to do that. Yeah, but it doesn't matter though. You said it though. And this is just prison mentality. If you say you're going to give me something. I don't care your mom didn't get it for you. You told me that. So we need to hold our word. So when Jeremy changed the contract about the floor. With like, I need this much to be able to make. We need to make this much. He led like that too, right? But I won't be able to like. And I'm just like, Mac you bloody. But I was literally like, okay. And then you were like, wow, that was really. That was so fast. I was like, yeah, that's fine. Before BC, Johnny. Oh my gosh. I'll be like, but why you say that though? How come you didn't adjust at the first time? And then it would, and then he would think I'm stupid.
Cause he's like, bro, what the hell are you talking about? This is what, and I'll be like, it doesn't matter. I wouldn't think you're stupid. My lawyer was the one that was secretly behind the scenes advising. I found out with you, honestly. This is my financial advisor. Yeah. Yeah. But my lawyer was the one that was kind of giving me counsel. He's greedy. No, he's greedy. He's greedy. What I'll say is, no, I didn't know that was going to happen, but I've never seen you trip ever. And that's why I was wondering like when you were talking about the, no, like I've seen you get upset, but I've never seen you actually like pop off. And it's like, when you were talking about with pastor, you're like, oh, he said something. And I was about to bite his head off. I'm like, have you really had a relationship? Have you ever popped off on pastor? A hundred percent. I believe that. I've known you now for two years. I've never seen it. I believe it. Early on, I would, I would threaten pastor, like not in a, in a, in a way with like physicality, but it was more of just like, all right, I'll just leave then. And then like, he would just be like, that's your go-to like you're a runner,
you know? And then I would be like, I would blow up. As soon as someone would touch that pain point of mine, you're a runner or you, you, you just skirt accountability. I would go, whoa. I would just blow up. So I remember like smashing the table, like boom. And like breaking it. And I was just like, so what? You know? And he's just like, okay, but Johnny, you can yell. But like, you're still like, you're still a runner. Double down, bro. And he, he would say things like, you know, man, I wish like I should have let Johnny hit me. Cause he probably would have felt bad after that. And like, I was just like, dang, like, and he's right. I would have, you know, but I would leave. I would leave. And I popped off then I've popped off on pastor Han before when he, you know, was just trying to help me, you know, he was telling me that I was an evil person and I'm like, bro, what the hell? Like we were all good. Why are you telling me I'm evil? And, and he shared with me that he really loved me. And he, but he had a heart of like, as much as I love Johnny, like I'm not his savior, but like, I almost feel like I'm his savior. Like he was very, he said, he said in his testimony, I'm very drawn to Johnny.
Like he's just very like cool. So when I seen him, I seen him as my son, but I had this kind of feeling of like, dang, if I do this, I'm not going to chastise Johnny. I'm not going to help him grow. And we'll both like lose like our way. And so when he was sipping coffee, I remember he looked at me. He's like bad man. That's what he said. And I was like, what the hell? Cause he has horrible magic getting grilled, but then grilled in broken English is like way worse. Right? You bad. And I'm like, okay, what the hell? Like, and I laughed and he didn't laugh. He's like, Oh, you really bad. And I was like, why is this food tripping? And his wife, she was cool. She like speaks full English, you know? And I was like, what the? And she was kind of shocked too. She just looked at him and she's like, he's kind of on one right now, you know? And so I was like, man, whatever. I just get up and I was walking out. And it was recently that one deacon or elder became an elder. And it was at his house. He's like an old man. older dude, this was years ago, obviously.
And he just like chased me out. The pastor, Pastor Ron was like, Johnny, what's wrong, you know? Like, and I was just like, I'm pissed. Like, why you do that? Everything is cool. Why are you like Buzz Killington right now? You know, like, I'm all sitting there. Like, I finally feel like I'm loved here. And you just like flip my foundation. Like, what are you doing? And then he's like, wow, I'm really glad I did that. And I'm like, you're glad you did that? Why? And he's like, because look at you. Like, you only are here for the vibes. And I was like, well, what's wrong with that? And I had a mouthpiece, you know? And he speaks Mandarin. So I was telling him in Mandarin. And I was like, whatever. And then he's like, so what do you wanna do, Johnny? Like, are you trying to run away? And I was like, yeah. But I was pissed. I got so mad that I wanted to like knock him out. Legit, I had the heart like, I'm gonna just knock this dude out, you know? Which is crazy. Knocking out a pastor is crazy.
But I was up to here because he touched a pain point of mine where he's just like, you think you're good, but you're like really evil. And I'm like, dude, do you understand that I've been told I was evil all my life and I'm trying to do good right now? I feel like you're so insensitive to my situation. Oh, you're trying to troll me. That's how I took it as. Like, oh, you're a piece of garbage. You're not a good pastor. Actually, he was fighting for me, right? So yeah, and him too, he was just like, man, he went through a lot, bro. He went through a lot with me, genuinely. Pastor Ron, shout out to him. But I learned so many lessons through him to be like, oh, I didn't know my heart was like that, but he kept showing me my heart. And he was like, you're this, you think you're this, you're not this. So every time when I see people on Discord, I see certain people, like I could see their heart posture because I literally went through that, right? And I was self-righteous to the core. And he's like, we need to break this. And our pastors are down. They're just down to be like, I'll break it for you. Like, I'll get socked in the face, but I'll break it for you.
And in the end, you're gonna see this lesson and you're gonna grow from it. And every single person's like that. Pastor John Choi went through that. All the pastors went through the way that we went through. And now, obviously, a lot of people are more softer. So, you know, they're not as like that anymore because the generation has just became softer. Honestly, I ain't even trying to disrespect all the other people, but you guys have it good. When you're sitting there and you're constantly being told, do this, and then flipped, and then testing, and, you know, trying your patience, it does build a character in people to go, all right, I understand the program, I'm gonna get with it. Versus like, if you can't sink, if you don't swim, you're gonna sink. So they threw us out there and it was like spiritual life Blitzkrieg. It was just like a thousand miles per hour, basically. And I had to learn very fast that I wasn't the center of attention, that I wasn't a good person. And like legit, I had a lot of weaknesses and I need to learn to sit in my weakness, not run from my weakness. And that was very difficult. But even till this day, right, I'll be honest, there's times where the weaknesses pop up and my habitual feelings are like, I wanna take off.
The first thing I ever wanna do is just dip. I'm just like, you know what, whatever money I got, just put it in whatever and go to a country that it stretches my money like 300 fold and just dip out. Which country? I don't know, Columbia. Starts with a C. China? No, that one, money stretches out. Cambodia? No. Rhymes with that one. Rhymes with that one. But yeah, it's hard to cut you off. No, but genuinely though, I'm like, dang, I kind of struggled with those things. And again, it comes back to acknowledging. Like, okay, I'm a person who wants to run. Just because I wanna run doesn't mean I'm doing it. And I'll kind of shock myself too because I'll sit there and then it'll be, it really is God, man. Like every time I feel like that, Pastor John calls, Pastor Kim calls. Like it's so crazy, bro. Like they don't call often, but it's when I'm going through it and I can't like share it with the team or I can't share it with anyone.
And I'm just like going in my prayer and boom, pastor will call me, yeah. So were you going through it today? No, no, no, not today. No, Jeremy. Well, you said you got a call from him this morning and it was a good call. Oh no, that was a good call. That was about the church stuff. Oh, okay. It was like, congratulations. You are sanctified. But it was like really nice. And then he said that you are justified and you are sanctified. And I was like, thank you, Moksani. But you're dirt. I'm like, okay. You ever throw your dirt back? Oh, hell no, bro. Hell no, I'm not you. No, I'm definitely not, definitely not. But yeah. Still can't wait. I can't wait to have Pastor Kim on someday. Dude, he will. Aaron, I just really want you to take everything he said at that last part, really absorb it. You know, you got it on easy mode. I know.
I think that- You got it on easy mode. But I think that about, I believe you, because it's true, I feel about like a lot of things. And they were saying that about our generation too, but I'm saying like, school is easier. These kids aren't even reading at the same reading level anymore. Tests are easier, like, and they were saying that even when I was coming up, the older people would always, oh, you guys have it so easy. And people will always just be saying that. But I believe it's true just because people are soft now. And people are just smarter. They're just smarter. So like, it's easier to trust yourself nowadays. A lot of values are kind of like gone. And this individualism is very toxic where it's like you matter and everything, you know. But I came in an era where it doesn't matter what you feel, it's all about God. And so you had to put yourself second. You had to put yourself last sometimes. And it really helps, you know, to kind of go through that. But it turned a lot of people away, you know. It reminds me of like Jesus when he's like, he had like 70 disciples at one point and then it dwindled down to 12 because he- He had 70?
Never, I didn't know this. Yeah, he had a lot. And in the end, he had multiple actually, but it comes down to 12. And he tells them, will you guys leave me too? Because of the way that I speak and say things, because I challenge you. And I'm just like, dang, like, and they stayed. Well, 11 of them did, you know. And so at the end of the day, I think, you know, weaknesses, it's so good to have your weaknesses. Past traumas, I know this sounds crazy, is good for you. It molded me to be who I am. It molded you to be who you are. And everything really was a lesson or a blessing. But a lot of people think, you know, ah, I don't wanna acknowledge this trauma. When you acknowledge trauma, then you're able to take that trauma and then give it to God, like plug Jesus into it. And acknowledging trauma plus adding Christ into it, it's a recipe for healing. You start to heal and go, oh, I understand now why I had to go through that. Too many people are stuck on, why did I have to go through that? If God is good, why, why, why? Versus I get it now, I understand. And even if I don't understand, I'll give it up to God. Because I don't need to question God's character
because human beings who weren't under God did something to me, right? It's like, we don't have to do that. There's also another perspective where it's like, Lord, thank you. You know, I have a lot of traumas. I was essayed when I was 12 by a 17-year-old girl, which kind of twisted my mentality on women. And I used to think, why did God allow those things to happen? And then when I started doing mentoring, before I met you guys, I was having a wave of people who were getting, who were assaulted. And I was like, dang, I could never relate to them had I not been through that, you know what I mean? So, but for the, it took how many years for me to see that? From 12 all the way to 28, not even, 12 to like 30, 32? Like, it took 20 years for me to go, oh, snap, that's why you, I get it now. And everyone's like, they're like, wait, you did too? Because they'll come and they'll be like, there's something that happened and I don't want to go too in detail, but it involved a family member. It's always vague like this. And they did something in it. But then when I'm like, oh, me too,
and I speak so freely, they just connect. Wow, wait, you went through that too? And I'm like, yeah. I literally went through like, did I do something wrong? And they're like, that's how I feel. Like, was it because I did something wrong and they did that to me? And am I wrong because I liked it? And, oh yeah, I liked it too. And it was like, wait, what? That's not a normal person who doesn't have that trauma would not be able to understand that. They would be like, yeah, you just have to give it up to God. It's like, yeah, but we walked through that though. And we overcame that. And I'm kind of like a beacon of hope for those people. And I didn't even plan that. I was just more like, if you guys want me to be honest, I was like, dude, did something happen to me? Like, did she do something to me and have other people do stuff to me? Like, I was for the longest time like, dang, did I get like, in another way, right? And I'm like, did that happen to me? Because I remember I got thrown out by like four dudes. So I was like, oh my gosh, is that what it was? And again, even God cleared that up for me too. Was like, nah, bro, none of that happened. That was her cousins.
And she was like the daughter of the shot caller basically. So, you know, they just toss you to the side because she couldn't carry you. And I was like, oh shoot. And it was wild. So that received clarity. You know, I'm able to still relate to a lot of other. people now because of it, people watch that and like, bro, I've been through that too. You guys would be surprised how many people have been assaulted. Like I know a lot of people who are like, they don't say anything, but they were assaulted, whether it's by an auntie or, and especially men, because we can't talk about that. Like I was going out there, I was 12 years old and I was trying to ask like, oh, this girl, she did this to me. And the guys, they were teenagers were like, you're lucky. And I'm like, wait, I'm lucky, but it doesn't feel right though. No, but you're lucky, bro. Like, she's so fine, bro. And I'm just like, okay. And like, it was so, it messed with my innocence, bro, straight up. And it like twisted my view of like how women are. And then it made me feel like I got taken advantage of and I couldn't, and I couldn't even control that. I'm like, dang. Okay. So I can't control my house with my dad beating me up. I can't control my mom, like being an actual mom. I can't control my homies. I can't control getting jumped. And I, and I can't control this either, man. I'm going to be a control freak. Now I'm going to control everything in my life. And that, that right there turned me into a monster straight up. Daily devotions are back and they're in your email. Every single day, I start with the word of God. And I share that with you guys so that you can also have the same peace, hope, and happiness that I move forward throughout the day. Every morning, I send you a piece of scripture and an explanation to help you with your spiritual walk. There's nothing more powerful than starting your day with the word of God. This quick two minutes each morning will set you up for the rest of your day. These are a hundred percent free. So if you want to sign up for the emails, link in the description. So sometimes I feel guilty and especially early on in my walk, I would feel really guilty as a Christian. I do certain things be like, Oh, I know I shouldn't have done that. And I would have this question and it lingered for a long time. How do I know if this guilt is from God or if it's from the enemy? And the best way to
actually tell is if the guilt makes you run away from God, run from him essentially, then it's not from God, right? And this guilt feeling first and foremost is never from God. God never shames you or guilts you. He's in there in the pain and he's actually like fighting for you. And so if you look at Adam and Eve, it unlocked it for me when I saw just after they committed sin, they felt guilt and God was like, Adam, Adam, where are thou? Where are you? And the first thing they did was they ran. They ran right after covering it up. They ran. Why would you cover something up? Because you're guilty of it. You don't want it to be exposed. And secondly, you ran away. But I noticed that God never ran away from them. He walked towards them. And so that made me realize that God is not ashamed of your guilt. He's not like angry at you for being a sinner. You're born that way. You didn't have a choice to even choose the sin. You're born into it. And God wanted to show you that, hey, I accept you for your weaknesses. In fact, I walk towards you not to hurt you, but to heal you and to help you with everything, right? Different ages. So I'm very thankful that, you know, God was able to show me through Adam and Eve story that there is no condemnation. Like, I'm not condemning you. I didn't curse you. I cursed the ground. It says, curse is the ground for your sake. And that's why we die. Because our flesh is made out of the afad, which is dust and the dirt of the earth. And so if you guys have that feeling where it's like, you're stupid, you're dumb, you're too guilty. That's who you are now. That is not from God. God will never say that. God will be like, hey, of course you did wrong, but return back to me. And I'm here for you regardless of what you did. And I nailed that even to the cross. So walk in that identity. And I was able to kind of tell this way, right? And guilt will always draw you away from God, essentially. And guilt also attacks who you are, not what you did. And I know it's a little confusing, but when people feel guilty, oh, I shouldn't have cheated or I shouldn't have done this, right? And then you feel extreme guilt. Really what it is, is that guilt is attacking your identity now. Because I cheated, because I did something, I'm not a good person anymore. So it's actually attacking deeper than just the surface level of I shouldn't have done that. It's more of, wow, I did that and now I can't sit there and boast about how good I am. I can't sit there and say I'm a good person anymore because I did something evil or bad. And with that, as long as we acknowledge that, we're able to go, okay, this is not from God. Yes, I did those things, but this is exactly why God is here for me. This is exactly why God has to deliver me from these things, so. You feel guilty when eating snacks? Do you run towards God or away from God?
No, I just blame you guys. Yeah, that's true. We go to dinner and then he texts us afterwards, never again. And does it the next week? No, I'm in a perpetual losing the same five pounds over and over because. Good Lord, struggle keeps us connected. with God. So I have a question about more weakness. I have one more weakness question. So when you do a lot of one on one mentorship, what have you seen are some of the big biggest weaknesses that ruin a relationship? Poor acknowledgement of those weaknesses. So like not acknowledging because of pride or ego or just being good, that they're weak. Like, it's okay. There are people who've cheated and I've literally reconciled it back like restored that marriage because they literally just acknowledge Oh, that's who I was. Yeah, I messed up. When people like catastrophically end is when they go No, I messed up. But like you messed up too. And they don't acknowledge that point of like, I messed up. I'm sorry, there is no but like, how are we going to handle this? Right? So that number one, number two people are not aligned with God. So they trust themselves. The second thing is always trusting yourself. So if you don't trust yourself, how are you going to end up cheating or ruining your relationship? You'll sit there and you'll ask your significant other for everything. And I know certain people who even dislike that like I was mentoring a girl and she's like, my husband is not like a man. He literally asks me for everything. Hey, babe, what do you think about this? Hey, babe, what do you think she was misunderstanding his respect for her as like, bro, you're a decision maker, make some freakin decisions, you know, but then I shifted her perspective to go, but he's confirming with
you, which shows respect. He's not depending on you. Of course he can make these decisions. But he's like, I want to include you into that. And she was like, yo, I feel horrible. I didn't realize that he was actually loving on me. I was just more like, what the heck? Like, why you need me to make the smallest and simplest decisions? Like, Oh, am I going to pick up my daughter? Are you going to pick up your it's like, he was thinking that because he wants you to spend time with her and he doesn't want to like step on your toes. Like he wants to go and spend time with her, but he took her out for four days. Like he wants you to, you know, and have that kind of, and she's like, Oh, shoot. I didn't even think about it like that. I was just more like, that's your daughter pick her up. Like, what are you doing? And it wasn't, it doesn't click for certain people. So interesting. And yeah, the first one you said is super real, just like not in acknowledging the weaknesses and not never actually changing or coming to the right, the same page. Yeah, that that's in every relationship, financial business relationship, friendships, you know, intimate relationships, emotional relationships. Like, if you can't learn to acknowledge I messed up, what you're saying is fair. It's valid. You're not going to move on. You're literally going to be like, what the heck like, but I'm not wrong though. And that's where it gets stuck. It's like, I know I messed up. And let's move forward from this versus I didn't mess up, but let's move forward. But that's the whole point. You have to acknowledge that in order to move forward. It's like, but I didn't though. Let's just move on. It's like, no, you can't do that. Because it's going to keep reoccurring. If you don't acknowledge it, then you can't fix it right and got
and you don't you can't, you're going to keep falling into the same trap. And so everyone else around you is going to have to bleed for that essentially, right? Like, right. If you don't realize that you're doing it or on the other flip side of the token, if you're a significant other is like never acknowledging weaknesses or making compromises, it's just impossible. Like every conversation only ends with like you accepting it and moving on or whatever, but there's no actual middle ground found. And the last thing is, I think people love to ridicule versus helping one another restore, right? So even if a person doesn't acknowledge, they don't want to help them acknowledge, right? If a person does acknowledge, then they don't want to restore them, they ridicule them and be like, Oh, see, like, you should have listened to me. This is where you messed up and you're dumb and blah, blah, blah. Like, you can point out a person's weakness. But the whole goal of that is to restore them is to go, hey, that messed up, we both got hurt in this. Let's not do that again. Let's like move forward from this versus like, you messed up and you hurt me and now you owe me things and you need to make me feel better and like, you're stupid for that. And you need to catch up now. And it's you're basically emasculating people, right? And so at the end of the day, I think like, you know, you have to be able to tell the truth. Yes. But to tell the truth to heal people not to expose people and not to belittle people and not to make them feel less than it's more of like, this is the truth and it hurt me. And I just want you to understand that so that you know, we can we can move forward with this versus like, everyone takes things defensively. If I'm trying to
tell you something, then they get defensive about it. And if you have a heart to expose or like, not restore people, I rather you just don't even like say anything to them, like pray for them, right? So that's this. I noticed this in the Christian community. It's like people love to like make videos. videos and talk about us, it's like, but if you spent this, cause I know those videos take a long time to stitch up and like add your effects and like sit there for an hour and whatever, if you spent that time doing that, praying for me, you don't think God would help and actually answer and like fix it way better than you trying to just bring and shed light to it and like ruin people's perspectives. You know, it's like, it's kind of crazy. You kind of said it Johnny, but I'm just curious what your guys' biggest weaknesses are. Maybe we can save it for dinner, but what are y'all, what is your biggest weakness? What's everyone's biggest weaknesses? That maybe we can. My biggest weakness is that I have no weaknesses. Yeah, I don't want to see any of that. Oh, I work too hard. My biggest weakness is Latinas. What is your biggest weakness, Jerome? I'm too strong. Too smart, too funny, too cool. Yeah. What's my weakness? Probably that I'm stubborn.
Hmm. You interrupt, Johnny. I think my biggest weakness. Stab you. Is also kind of acknowledging, like acknowledging myself too, that I am weak in a lot of things and I just don't like to be weak. So I guess you could say pride, but like it's more of just acknowledging who I am. Like, I don't think it's a pride ego thing. It's more of just like, dang, I don't want to be that weak. So my weakness is that I don't want to be weak, but I am. Does that make sense? Yeah. You say yours and then I have a funny little thing I'm going to say. I don't know. You can fire off if you want. No, you need to say your weakness first as part of the exercise. My weakness, probably substance abuse in some regards, but that's a deeper, there's probably a deeper weakness there. Okay, great. Now we're going to go around and we're going to set, the other people are going to say what your weakness is. Oh, okay, okay.
We're going to see how, what's it called? When you can self reflect on yourself, how honest you are with yourself. All right. So Johnny, what's his real weakness? That's it for the episode. I could talk, I could, I have weaknesses for you guys. Oh no. But you guys are going to have to tell me my weakness. Okay, okay, okay. So wait, wait, wait, wait. Let's take a little moment to pause. Or I'll go first for you guys. A weakness doesn't just mean what you don't like about someone. It's what you're identifying as their weakness. It's not your weakness is my pain. It doesn't necessarily mean that you're weak because they say that. You annoy me because. No, I know that. I know that. I like to say something hella mean. You're ugly, you're ugly. I'll start and maybe it'll help you guys think more. I think one of your main weaknesses, Jeremy, is that you, to a fault, and you could be like, oh, it's a superpower, blah, blah, blah.
But you'll get obsessed with the details to the point where it'll almost hold you back. It'll be things like every single bite of food needs to be exactly the same. You're gonna ask ChadGBT what to get from Portillo's before we show up. It's just like sometimes you, even the level of obsession or tripping over it, it's like you're not submitted to the, it's like sometimes the details will lose you. Yeah. The devil's in the details. No rebuttal. No rebuttal. Hey, but listen. My, me, me, my turn, my turn. Okay, fine, fine, fine. What about if I'm keep gaining five pounds, which is why I had to hook up Portillo's? That's fine. You guys are bad influences. But it's like if you're obsessing so much to the point where you're like, guys, I worked so hard. I worked out. Now I'm gonna go have this cheat meal. It's gonna be canned. It's like you're tripping. You're not submitted to the issue that you have with the food. It's like if you, it's on your mind all the,
you're obsessing over it. If you weren't thinking about it so much. I mean, I'm just saying, normal people don't do that. So I'm just saying like if you, it's clearly has taken you over to the point where you're like, oh, I'm working all these days out so I can go eat this. It's like something else needs to be readjusted. It's not the, in the details of what to order at Portillo's, it's further back. It's like, what else can be readjusted? The food thing, I understand was the example, but I get, no rebuttals, I understand. Yeah. My turn. I would identify one of your weaknesses. I think whether it's because you want to stay on everyone's good side, or maybe it's that you want to constantly be heart gaining, but I feel like you have an issue being fully honest all the time. You'll walk on glass, you're like, I think maybe we should do this. Oh, just kidding. Probably not actually. It's like, Johnny, just say what you wanted. And I think it's because you don't want people to look at you differently or you don't want to be disagreeable, but it's like, sometimes I think you struggle
to at least the first time be, like say your feelings. True. I agree. It is hard gaining, but also partially that too. He got no problem telling me. So yeah, maybe you're good at it with us, obviously. Gaining, but it's just like yeah, or even like you'll like one of we'll back you down really quickly Like we'll say something like oh, never mind. Never mind. It's like but you can stand on ten toes and you can walk Walk Jeremy down two to one though. Yeah, I'm just a nice guy We should just have a two-to-one vote like a vote next time. Yeah. Yeah true I mean, I mean, that's what I do not just in my head if I'm like, I want it and then you say no And you say no, I just fold. Mm-hmm. Cuz I'm a nice guy See you skinny you think you're too nice, that's your weakness. Mmm True and I blow up crazy Now you don't blow up crazy legit. You don't blow up crazy. I hear the stories and I'm like, oh my gosh What did we get ourselves into? What if that's what if he hits his head one day too hard? Like the light falls down it hits his head and it snaps him back into that like a sleeper agent. Yeah Okay your turn then I'll go last. Okay. Okay. Okay. What do I think is Aaron's weakness? I think Aaron's weakness and it can't be the one I said, obviously. No, I know. I know I think yours is It it was you've changed but it was like lack of accountability Like you would just say you were gonna do things not do them then apologize and be okay Well, he apologized but then not do it and then it would is that accountability or is that action? lack of just action Well that but it's like you'd be like you would know why you you could take accountability And then you just wouldn't do it, right? Okay, but then but then you know what I think the deeper weaknesses It's like you're like, ah, nah, this is better. This is above me, right? Okay, right. That's sure I'll take your chat. It was not caring more than anything. It's just like Right, cuz you could take accountability, but if nothing changes, yeah Yeah, there were certain things that I certainly just for sure just didn't care. That's for sure. Yeah, I'll take that
Johnny what's Johnny's I would say Johnny yours was good that that kind of verbalized it better I would say that Johnny's is I Mean he's said it before it's like the perfectionist thing Like he gets really he gets really frustrated and then when he and then he gets frustrated that he's frustrated Hmm, I'd say that's probably a weakness. That's facts. And then and then and then when he gets frustrated that he's frustrated He takes it out on me Partially true. Yeah I think what Jeremy's is more I Think I think with Jeremy it's more of Understanding and he's getting getting better at this understanding the grace aspect where it's just like yeah, but if I did this then Where where where then like do I need to give him grace if I created ten notions and I spent like it's like it It's true, but grace aspect Aaron I think also got better at this. I Think you would feel like you would judge too quickly Mm-hmm, like you would be like Dude, it's not gonna work and then you're like, okay my bad So, yeah, he doesn't really do that that much. Yeah, that's true though. Yeah before it would be like Dude, I should if I just waited like a little bit longer Then I'd be able to and and I was gonna say the accountability thing. It's not accountability. It's more of like, yeah It's beneath me. Yeah, we could sense that where it's like, I don't I Don't want to do this. Yeah, sure. Yeah, but even that has gotten a lot better, too Notice I told you guys you guys got better and you didn't tell me that I got better That was my weakness for you is that you sugarcoat things you can't be fully on it like there's certain things that still haven't gotten better for sure, but yeah, yeah Jesus I'll take that. I'll take that. I'll take those weaknesses those weaknesses like I'm not taking those weaknesses We're running the fate after this
I'm just kidding. No, that was good though. That was good guys beyond. No, no, don't not comment what our weaknesses are Comment our weaknesses ain't you? No, they don't know me. They don't people that don't know me gonna say my weaknesses. That's true. True They're like, oh, yeah Well, like comment and subscribe and we should have said this at the very beginning of the episode, but we're dropping an app It's been announced and if you want the first sneak peek, all you got to do is hit the link in the bio It just says right there join the waitlist. This is crazy everything you want. This app can help you Gain biblical clarity and will help you with daily guidance everything Everything everything you guys got the joke can everything that Johnny teaches here at core of the heart Art is packaged in this app to make spiritual life, little bite-sized morsels, cause you've got a little tiny mouth and you give full quickly. I have one more thing to promote while we're here. We are going back on the road for Johnny Chang live events, Johnny Chang live events are back. All of his neighbors just heard that by the way. And I just wanted to say, we're going to a lot of different places. I won't really announce them all right now, but we're going back all across the country again. And we are looking for a live events coordinator to work at core of the heart. So if you saw the past live events, it's thousands of people coming to churches around the country, bringing donations, live Q and A's, meet and greets, it's amazing opportunities for the local communities, food trucks come out, there's fellowship. Um, it's just a really, really awesome event all the time. And if you're the type of person who has thrown events like this, if you have experienced coordinating events like this, we are looking for someone to literally book one to two events. Every month for the rest of the year and potentially the rest of all time. You got to be good at talking to churches, cold, reaching out.
We're also doing prison ministry. So coordinating with, uh, the prison wardens, things like that, attention to detail, setting up volunteers, setting up the live stream, setting up the cameraman, I don't want to make it seem overwhelming. You know, we have all the checklists. It's a pretty, it's a mean Aaron. Do it. We figured it out. We do it. We want someone. And so if you, if you can look at us and be like, they did it and I do this for a living, I can do it. Yes. And, and I'll just be really honest. We're not really looking for people who will come try this. Oh, maybe I can be good at that. Or, oh, I could probably do that. I really, we want someone who has done this before who can look at our events and say, oh, I can level that up. I can make that better. Oh, why would they do that? Like that? We usually do it like this. That's what we're looking for. If you've done live events, please call us. We pay super competitively. Leave your job. If you want it to do something spiritual and throw live Christian live events around the country. The other thing too, is you just got to love people because, you know, with these
events, when you're dealing with all kinds of people from different churches and prisons and walks of life, it just requires you to be loved people. So yeah. Certain servant mindset guys, uh, pastors, we all are servants at the end of the day. So we just have to serve people. And if you have that hard to serve people and make sure they have a good, uh, you know, if our, our podcast or the way I serve has touched your guys's heart to then replicate that for the millions and hundreds of thousands of other people to also experience that that's, that's important, you know, more than anything. So service. If you would like to apply, the link is in the description. You click on it and follow every single instruction. If you don't, we'll know that you don't have intention to detail and we just skip right over you. It's very, you'd be like, well, what does that mean? You know, you'll just see it's very, very clear. So true. Yeah. And by the way, we have been hiring amazing people from the community. Yeah. We're finding good, amazing editors. So thank you to everybody that is also taking the time to apply and start to be a part of this. And again, if it's, if you know someone like this, who, you know, does events, it doesn't have to be you. Right. Like spread the word for us too. That also helps too. So. Yes.
Yes. All right, guys. And the last thing is the sooner we get that person, the more live events. Yeah, true. You'd help us tremendously. All right. With that being said, this wraps up the episode as we always end in unlearned wisdom fashion. We end it with the prayer. So let us bow our heads, everybody. Father God, thank you so much, Lord, for giving us this podcast and just giving us the breath in our lungs to acknowledge ourselves. And I ask God that there's a lot of brothers and sisters here listening who struggle with acknowledgement, acknowledging that they're weak at times and truly struggling with self-sufficiency, but Lord, I ask that you crush that in them and allow them to go towards you, Lord, because self-sufficiency is truly from the enemy. It allows us to not depend on you, Lord, but you counterbalance that with our weaknesses so that we can depend on you, Lord. You said in Proverbs three, not to lean on our own understanding in all our ways, trust and acknowledge you. Lord, you want dependency. And you want us to only depend on your begotten son, which is Jesus Christ. And for that, Lord, we're so thankful because you want a relationship. You don't want us to stand on our own because we would then never, ever have a relationship with you and we would never, ever come to the kingdom or even seek you, Lord, so you give us trials and tribulations to show us, Lord, that we struggle daily, but not because we're weak, but because we struggle with surrendering. So I ask God that you also give the heart of surrender to everyone listening and
their family members and allow people to serve other people as well, because we are truly, truly weak, but when we are weak, then we are strong. As Paul says in second Corinthians chapter 12, Father God, we thank you for everything that you've given us from the. trials and the tribulations to the setbacks to the weaknesses, because you told us to boast in that and to be happy through those things, you've molded our character, you've shaped our wisdom. And ultimately you've built that, that trust inside of us to have faith in the most faithful person, which is you Lord. So thank you for that. And we leave everything in your hands and in Jesus name we pray. Amen. Amen. Like, comment, and subscribe.
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