You Are Loved | Joshua's Honest Testament of God's Faithfulness

Welcome to the series, You Are Loved. My goal is to share people's incredible stories in the hopes of encouraging you to keep going, no matter how hard it is, and to show you how loved you are by your heavenly father. This week, I have the honor of sharing with you Joshua's story. Joshua was only eight years old when he was introduced to drugs and only 15 years old when he became a father. He was a child trying to raise a child while dealing with a drug problem. When he shared what his life looked like over the next several years, he used words like death, FBI, cartel, federal prison, attempted suicide, and overdose. He had no hope and no identity. That is, until a man serving a life sentence told Joshua about his heavenly father, a prison officer saved him from dying and a stranger gave him the opportunity to change his ways. Watch to see how Joshua found hope as he discovered his true identity. Tell me a little bit about yourself. My name is Joshua Seal. My old therapist would say, you stand up and say, I am Joshua Seal, because that is your identity and you're not any of the nicknames we know you by. I come from Morristown, Tennessee, and I come from two goodly parents that tried with me. I was exposed at a young age to a lot of drugs. I became addicted to drugs at a very young age. It was disturbing. I was smoking marijuana and cigarettes at about eight years old. I had a very clear knowledge of things that girls and guys in my grade did not. I had a different perspective, and it didn't serve me well. My family became dysfunctional, even worse, whenever I got a woman pregnant when I was 15 years old and had a child with her, and I was a teenage father. She left us directly after about six months after my daughter was born, and it was a hardship. It was a hardship because at a young age like that, I was still a child, and I was a father of a child myself, and to be a kid trying to raise a kid was very hard, especially when I had a drug problem.

At a young age, I didn't have the ability to go out and earn a living properly because I was too young to even be hired. I turned right back to the street, to drugs, and I began to sell a lot of marijuana. I used to bring it into my parents' house, and they would facilitate, thinking that the rationale for me selling these drugs is I was going to end up dead in the street, so let's watch over him while he does it, which was just damaging as well. As time grew forward, I began to catch charges as I became older. My father died when I was 18. It was a blow. I felt like I'd lost my best friend, and I felt like I'd lost my direction. Threw me down a downward spiral, and I began to use even worse. I began to use intravenously, and it led down a terrible path. My friends began to die that were close. I lost a friend to his heart being broken and him murdering another man over a woman. Being lost, indulging in a curse of death, felt like I had no hope and didn't know who I was. I caught a felony, my first felony, for trafficking pills from Florida. I was doctor shopping down in Florida, involved with Roxycodone, and that got me a three-year sentence. That still didn't wake me up. I continued to use. I got involved with some Gulf cartel members and started to sell a lot of crystal meth. When that happened, things were really out of control. I got a 66-month federal sentence from the FBI after I was indicted and placed in prison in Talladega, Alabama. I just couldn't stop getting high. Even on the yard in prison, I would constantly stay high, chasing a feeling, trying to fill a hole in my heart. Lots of Christmases would go by, and I was far from home, and I didn't get visits. It was a lonely place in my heart.

Even still, once I got out of Talladega... I violated my parole and I got out and I went back to Montgomery Air Force Base and did time there and got out again and I violated again and went to McDowell in West Virginia and the federal prison there and right before I had violated that third time, my girlfriend died in prison from COVID and it hurt so bad that it was the first time in my life that I didn't want to live and that it felt so unfair that I was able to get out multiple times that she never had the opportunity to even try to make things right and I tried to take my life quite a few times while waking up in ICUs in Hamlin County in the back of ambulances in Knoxville. I violated my parole again and went to Laurel County, Kentucky and I had smuggled in about a gram of fentanyl with me and I overdosed there and ended up in Corbin, Kentucky handcuffed to a gurney and in Laurel County, Kentucky, I watched a man in my cell after I was put back in the population. I watched him all night. He'd stay up while the rest of us slept and I would hear him. He was praising God. It was a 16-year-old man named George Messer who was convicted of kidnapping when he was probably going to die in prison. I remember I would ask him whenever he would get up in the mornings, George, why are you awake all night? I can't stand to be around all this. I praise the Lord at night while you guys are making a racket. One morning, George woke up early and he came over to me and slid me a piece of paper and I said, what's happened? And he said, you know, Heavenly Father wanted me to give this to you, Joshua. And I said, George, are you off your meds? Well I opened it up to read it. I knew that it was God talking to me because it said in that piece of paper, out of your heart and disappointments I will bring great joy. I knew it was God because I could feel it in my heart.

About an hour later, the nurse came by and tried to call my name. I said, ma'am, I don't need meds or anything. She said, Mr. Seal, get outside. So I came outside and she said, you know, I saved your life. She said, I could have let you die in that cell, but I decided to put you in an ambulance and take you to the hospital. They worked on you for about an hour to get you back to life. And I felt so ashamed. I felt so terrible because this lady did not know me at all, but she saw fit to try to save me when I didn't feel worth saving. I had an interview through Skype with Carlos Garcia because for some reason, the three time violator, you know, who ran and ran and ran, for some reason I was going to be offered a rehabilitation, which to me at the time I thought was a joke. That was a way for me to get back out and go and rip it again. And when I got to True Purpose, I'll never forget because I looked at my mom for the first time. I was crying in front of her and I said, mom, I'm scared. And she kind of looked at me like, you're afraid? What are you afraid of? All that you've been through and you're going to sit there and tell me you're afraid now. There's nothing to fear. This place holds the one thing that you need and the one thing that you haven't had. And she said, it's Jesus Christ, you need Joshua. I had so much hurt in my heart from Jonica Quadras' death in prison. I had so much hurt in my heart that I had let everyone else around me down, that I didn't really deserve to live, that I didn't have a place in this world. Well, as I walked myself down the hill to get into the tabernacle house at the Maryville campus, I looked up. I saw Jonica's cousin, and he's far from home. I was like, what are you doing here?

And he said, I'm giving my heart over to Jesus Christ. I don't live that way anymore, Josh. No, but what are you doing here? Love needed to talk to someone from your family. I needed some sort of closure. And he prayed with me for an hour in that driveway. And that's where Angel Martinez and me walked up that hill on February the 14th of 2022. And I asked the Lord for a new heart on Valentine's Day. And it wasn't a mistake or a coincidence that I landed there on Valentine's Day, because he knew that I needed his love, and that I needed a new heart. And I learned that I needed a new heart. And I learned that in Ezekiel 36, 26, that he would take that heart of stone from me, that he would replace it with a heart of flesh and a new spirit. It's hard for me to examine myself. It is. I need feedback from others. But little did I know that I needed the feedback of good, godly men and women to direct me in a way where I can grow and I can be nourished. That's what True Purpose did for me, was to lean me on Almighty Christ Jesus. And he has healed me. He's given me a life of peace and plenty. So it's been just over two years? Yeah, two and a half years.

How does your life look different today compared to what it was, what that story you just shared with us? It's not your story today, is it? Absolutely not. Today, I walk in a blessing. Sure, I have problems every day, just like anybody else. There are trials that I encounter, hardships that I bear, but I walk in a blessing. Every day that I wake up, I don't have to pay to feel happy. I don't have to chase down joy. It's in my heart. Every morning that I prepare myself to go to the job that I've been blessed with, I love it. There is not one facet of my life that I'm not pleased with. And that is what the healing power of Jesus is. I can have joy in chaos. There's peace around me that doesn't make any sense to me in a lot of ways. People can look at me now and know, they can know that I'm not who I used to be. And who I am now is somebody that is the complete polar opposite of who I was. There's a tranquility in my life that hasn't ever been there. The Prince of Peace. Yes, I love it.

I love that. There's a lot of people still broken though. A lot of people in prison, lost, considering ending their life, searching everywhere in the world to find joy. What could you share with them that would give them some hope and encouragement? I believe it says it right here on my shirt. A righteous man will fall seven times but rise eight because we don't give up. Hold on. If you will choose to start over in your life, start from scratch. Remember that no man, even a firefighter, he will not run into a forest fire and think he won't get murdered. He wears his gear and I wear the armor of God. If you want to start over in your life and you want things to be better, if you want things to work out the way they should, all I can think of is the verse that says, pick up your cross daily and follow me because those who seek to save their lives will lose it and those who give up their life for my sake will gain it. What a prophet, the man that gained the whole world but loses his soul. Many times that we all fall and we want to give up. I know there are many, many women that have given up behind those walls in their hearts. There is a way out.

There is a way out. He is the way, the truth and the life. The only way that I ever made things better in my life was to surrender. I had to give up what I wanted. I had to serve Him. I'd never done that before because to me it wasn't tangible enough. I couldn't reach out and call Jesus. I couldn't talk to Him and hear His voice. And until I grew in the Spirit, until I became a disciple, I could hear the Word of God. I could hear His voice. I could see Him manifesting in my life. I could reach out and touch the creation that He made for me. But it's a process to be able to be healed by Jesus Christ. It is a process. I cannot go outside today and plant a seed and pick apples tomorrow. The growth that is involved is important. And as we grow, we are pruned so that we can produce more fruit. Patience and perseverance throughout trials are developed. These aren't things that we pray for that are gifts. The Lord expects us to go through these processes so that we can be strengthened and lack for nothing. Be strong and very courageous, say it the Lord. I love the Word of God because it changes things. I've become a person who is very strong in prayer. And I never thought I would say this coming from my background, but I'm a man who is proud to give good counsel. I'm proud to teach that true purpose once a month. I'm proud to be a part of my community. There are things that I would never give up now that I've gained, and that's to be dependable, counted on, and trusted. My integrity is not up for sale anymore. These are things that I value. And if I can bring hope to one person in my life, it will be through Jesus Christ, never by my own hand. Amen. I want to talk for a minute about love because I think that the world has a twisted understanding of what love looks like, what it feels like, how they would describe it. I know it's hard to put it into words, but what did you think love looked like when you were out living in the world, and how is it different today? Oh, man. When I was out in the world, love looked like somebody giving me a really good deal on a pound of ice or, you know, somebody coming up and getting me high,

you know. I was like, yeah, let me show you some love, Josh. Let me show you some love, right? Or maybe some sort of illicit sexual encounter with someone. It was distorted. Now in the world, in my world, what I think love looks like to me is sacrifice. I've watched as the Holy Spirit has moved in my life and the lives of those around me, and when I watch someone sacrifice for another to simply serve them, to simply see them to move forward or to gain, I am all about that. Now, this is something I want to be a part of daily. The Lord says to be a cheerful giver, and that doesn't just mean of your finance. It means of your heart. It means of your time, your presence, simply your presence in someone's life. These things are imperative, especially when it comes to love, because genuine love does not boast. It's not grainy. I love Corinthians because of that. It will describe what love truly is. Love for me is the fruit of the Spirit. I've come to be accustomed to being responsible and honest, willing, open-minded, caring, objective, a humble man who's gracious. These things are so important to have, these postures of your heart. They exude love and positivity. The enemy can have a foothold in all of our lives if you begin to blame others, if you operate in a power of orientation or feel entitled to things. Things can fall apart very quickly in our lives if we let the enemy take one foothold, but love conquers all. Yeah, that's great. I appreciate that very much. I think I love hearing stories like yours because it shows us what the enemy meant for evil, right? God can turn it around and do amazing things with it. He can take your story and work all things together for your good, but for his glory. And I know he's going to be glorified through this, through you being vulnerable and opening up and sharing what you went through. But this beautiful, beautiful new story that he's writing for you. And I just really appreciate your willingness to share that because I really believe, especially to the correctional facilities that this goes into, but not just that. To anyone who hears this story, I believe that it's going to touch their heart and bring them that hope and that encouragement and that peace. So thank you for sharing. I really, really appreciate you. I'm honored that you would do something such as this. There's so much need for people to

understand their value and that they have worth. You're not lost. You're not worthless. There is a special, precious place in our Father's heart for every man and woman. Absolutely. Yes. They're so loved. Thank you. You're welcome. Wasn't that incredible? Wow. Joshua shared such a heart-wrenching story of brokenness, but the outcome is amazing. He found peace, joy, and healing, and you can too. I love how he compared healing to an apple tree. You plant the seed, but it takes time to see the fruit. If you meet Jesus today and surrender your life to Him, He will begin the process of healing everything you ever went through. It's just going to take some time. Join us next week to hear another encouraging story and be sure to subscribe or follow so you never miss an episode. Most importantly, I pray that you know, no matter how far you or someone you love have run from God, it is never too late. There is always hope because you are loved. Amen.