Holy Disruption With Heather Schott | From LGBTQ to FREE — Our Stories

And while I was on the fast, I heard the Lord say, you're delivered from homosexuality. How can you say that I'm delivered, but I'm still struggling with this? And then it was this process of the Lord showing me that the deliverance is not the absence of temptation, it's the ability to steward freedom on the other side. I'll never forget, I was driving in Dallas since college. I was on the side of the road, and I was like, I'm about to walk into this traffic because I've cried out to you so many times, Lord, and you have not delivered me of this. I'm 20 plus years now, and you're not doing anything about it. What's going on? I remember the voice of the enemy speaking to me and telling me, you are always gonna struggle with this, and no man will ever find you desirable. I literally remember saying as a child, I wish that I just struggled with pornography that was like opposite sex, because at least then it would be normal, and there's a group I can go to where people will help me. But because we never talk about homosexuality in the church, it's like there's nowhere for me to go. So many pastors think, if I bring this up, if I teach about it, if I talk about everybody's leaving, I'm like, no, they all come because they all want freedom. It's the only one that the blood isn't powerful enough to set you free from.

When we don't talk about it, when we don't testify about it, and when we act like we don't want to touch somebody with a 10 foot pole if they ever struggle with it, we're saying the blood does not work. I was afraid to share my testimony. I'm like, they're gonna come after me. I did not live a very safe life. I was out here wiling in these streets, multiple encounters with multiple people, and I was afraid that they was gonna show up in the comments, and they're like, no, I remember when you did, or I remember and all this stuff. I'm like, yes, and right now, I felt the Lord. I just want to say. Welcome back to the Holy Disruption Podcast. I'm Jasmine Wheeler, joined by Heather Schott, and today's conversation is deeply personal for me and a big one in today's culture. We're talking about homosexuality and the LGBTQ plus agenda. This is an important conversation because we're watching an entire generation be discipled by culture on identity, sexuality, and truth. The culture is having the conversations with the next generation that the church is refusing to have. What scripture calls sacred, our identity, our bodies, our sexuality, is literally being redefined in real time,

right in front of our eyes, and we're still trying to decide if we should be talking about it from our pulpits. We're seeing it in entertainment. We're seeing it in education. We're seeing it on social media. We're seeing it in corporate campaigns, and yes, we're seeing the church become increasingly silent because many leaders are afraid of being misunderstood, labeled a bigot, or canceled, but silence has never set anyone free. While wolves in sheep's clothing are trying to enslave a generation by spreading false doctrine and false teachings about what the word of God says about homosexuality, it has become more important than ever that we have this conversation. I once heard someone say that a man with an argument is always at the mercy of a man with an experience, and so today's conversation is not about condemning people who identify as LGBTQ+, but it's about real people who have experienced the power of the blood of Jesus. It's about people who've encountered Jesus and discovered that their deepest identity was never meant to be found in sexuality, in feelings, or labels, or cultural affirmation. It was meant to be found in Christ, so today you're going to hear testimonies from individuals who once identified

within the LGBTQ community and entered the radical, transforming deliverance and love of Jesus Christ. Their stories are proof that Jesus still heals, he still restores, he still delivers, and he still makes all things new. For the parent listening who feels overwhelmed, for the pastor who feels intimidated to address this topic, for the person secretly wrestling with identity confusion right now, or for the believer who's trying to learn how to walk in truth and in love, this conversation is for you. So let's jump into today's conversation. I have my friends with me, Jalen, Mark, and Cheyenne. Jalen is the worship director of Mercy Culture East Fort Worth, and a presence-driven creative. He's a bold spiritual leader who's unafraid to testify of the goodness of God in his life and to see others walk in that same freedom that he walks in. Mark and Cheyenne are leaders in Mercy Culture that just recently moved to San Antonio to be a part of the Mercy Culture San Antonio campus. Mark attended our spiritual leadership school and produced Holy Disruption for the majority of the show's duration. Cheyenne was one of the event coordinators here at Mercy Culture for years,

and she just recently authored her book, The M Word. I've also been walking with Cheyenne for years. She's like one of my little sisters, one of my daughters in the spirit. They're hard workers, worshipers, and they just got married last November, which is super exciting. But myself and each one of our guests have a testimony of same-sex attraction. We've been delivered out of homosexuality, and we're here to tell the story about what God has done today. So let's start off with Jayla. Let's go! Hey! Let's go! Y'all ready to testify about the goodness of God? Let's go. Jalen, will you just start us off, will you tell us about your story where this all began for you? Yes. My avatar would be the little black boy who grew up in church. I was raised in church. My mother was an amazing mother. She was a single mother of two boys. I was the youngest. And my grandparents were the pastors, so I was always in church. I experienced the Lord at a young age. And I think the moment where things started to shift, I would say the enemy was after me, was at an early age of three or four years old. I'll never forget the moment. I was in school. My grandmother was an educator. And I had a sexual encounter happened to me in a Jack and Jill bathroom from another little kid. And from that moment, it was like every year something like that would happen to me. And as a little boy, I didn't know what to do or what to say because I just never experienced this before in my life. And as I got older, growing up in the church, I was raised by amazing women. And so when you're around a lot of women, there's traits that you pick up. And I remember

uncles and cousins being like, that little boy, he's a little feminine. You got to get around some men. And it wasn't anything in my sphere as a young man, but they would say things over me like, hey, you better watch out. He's going to be gay. Or, oh, you little fruit loop, or all these different things that in hindsight, 2020, words being spoke over me to a young boy who never knew what was actually happening. And so as I got older, navigating the teenage years of like, how do I do life? Like, how do I navigate this? Knowing that I love the Lord, still pursuing God, but I'm having this thing that I'm struggling with. And so I'll never forget, there was a season of my life heading in my teen years into my early twenties where I had to wrestle with God because I felt like he predestined me in this position. And I know a lot of people kind of feel like that, like, Lord, why would you let this happen to me? Why did this have to be my struggle? And so I had to navigate this hate that I had towards God, because one, my father wasn't present. He wasn't as present as I would like for him to be. So that just added to the fuel of like, I hate fathers. I hate male figures. I only trust women, and I don't trust anyone else. And so the attack started happening. I'll never forget. My grandfather was a great leader, but I'll never forget the moment I got caught watching porn. I think I was a teenager. And my grandmother walked in and saw it, and it was gay porn. And I remember just like being stuck and like shook. I'm like, oh, snap. I just got caught. Like, what's going to happen? She didn't say anything. She's like, come here, sit down. And my grandfather comes home, doesn't say anything to me. And I was like, okay, what's going to happen? I'm going to tell my mom. My mom comes. And that was like a whole nightmare afterwards, just like a shame and all the things that came along with like, okay, well, I finally got a sliver of me being seen right now that I just learned how to just keep into myself. Like I had this internal world. My brother was the one who would like say everything. And I was the one who was like, no. I know the consequences of that, so I'm just not going to say anything. And so I'll never forget that following Sunday, my grandfather gets up and preaches about it, homosexuality and against it. And it was just like another thing. But they didn't talk with you about it? They didn't talk to me about it. And I just saw moments in my life where I just wanted someone to just sit with me and say, hey, you were a son. This is what God is calling you to be. And I just want to restore identity in you. But at the time, I don't remember many of those things happening. Or even to try to process with you of what was happening in you. What's going on?

Especially I would say in the black community, there's this thing like sweeping things under the rug. Like out of sight, out of mind. We're not going to talk about it. It's a thing that's kind of been there, especially on the sexuality in the black church is prevalent. You just don't talk about it. They sing, they dance, they create, they do all the things. But you just don't want to. They don't want to touch on it because they do talk about it. And then they leave or they don't want to talk about it at all. And we just kind of just let it be. And so that's kind of environment that I feel like I grew up in. And so as I got older, I'll never forget the pursuit. The pursuit of God really started with me. I had a moment with the Lord and I was like, you know, I tried to, I tried to to commit suicide. And I'll never forget, I was driving in Dallas, it was in college, and I got off, I was on 75, I was on the side of the road, and I was like, I'm about to walk into this traffic, because I've cried out to you so many times, Lord, and you have not delivered me of this, and I'm 20 plus years now, and you're not doing anything about it. And I'm hearing the scriptures, I'm reading the word, and I know this is not true, and it's something in me to know this is not who I am, and you're still not rescuing me, what's going on? And I remember about to open the door, and the presence of God comes and fills the car, and I couldn't move, I couldn't even get out of the car, I'm just weeping to the Lord, and I'm like, okay, you're real? And I remember at that moment, I remember telling the Lord, I said, all right, if you never deliver me, you're still good, you're still a good God,

you're still a good Father, because you carried me this far, you're still speaking to me. I remember around that time, I received my prayer language, I received like, I saw miracle signs and wonders, and I saw these things, and the Lord was like, I felt like he was drawing me into more of him. But the full deliverance wasn't yet, and so I'm like, what is happening? Like, okay, a lot of things are happening, God is real, like I'm seeing him in everything, and so I got to that place, I was like, okay, Lord, I believe that you are a deliverer, but if you don't, you're still good. And that was the moment I started to see this difference. And so I'll never forget, I was worshiping at a previous church, still kind of living this like, double life, and it was just killing me all, like, I was like, I don't want to do this anymore, like, I'm tired, like, I just want to go to a place where I can just heal, you know, be free. And it wasn't, I would see many people operating like that, and whether it's same sex attraction, or whatever else, fill in the blank, I just saw a lot of people doing both things at the same time. And it was- Living in sin. Living in sin. And still being in ministry.

And still being in ministry. And it was the atmosphere of it. And when you create an atmosphere of it, it will grow. And little did the leaders know, what they were allowing was allowing more in my life. Wow. And so they didn't know what was happening. And so as the Lord finally transitioned me from that place, and he was still keeping me close, and I'll never forget those moments, like, all right, Lord, like, I love you, like, I trust you in whatever you want to do. And so I started, I got this job, and it was trying to bring me back home. So from Fort Worth, I was like, I don't want to go back home, I don't want to do this. And God's like, you're going to do this. And somebody gets hired on my job, they was like, hey, my CFO was like, hey, there's somebody I want you to meet, because I just met with these pastors, and they're coming here to move, and they're planting a church in Fort Worth, and I really think you would like, I think you would like them. And I was like, okay, sure, whatever. They didn't tell me where it was. And I met the person that moved, and it was like, hey, I've got to obey the Lord, and I need you, like, I got to invite you to a team night.

And I was like, what is the name of this place? It's like, it's called Mercy Culture. I was like, where is it located? It's in Fort Worth. I said, I'm not going to that thing, I'm not coming. And the Lord was like, the Lord started dealing with me. He was like, I need you to go. And I was like, okay, I'm going to go. We were walking in, and it was a place where I felt the presence of God. I walked in, I was like, whoa, what is this? Like, I've never felt anything like this. I still remember this day. Yes, Pastor Jazza, you was up, and you were worshiping, and Laura answered a prayer of mine. And so I remember leaving that place and being like, I'm never coming back here again. They just revealed my heart and heart. When you just blurted those in, never to God. The Z, inner vows, I'm telling you. That was on my inner vows, never go back home. And because it was a place of hurt, it was a place of pain. And I didn't realize the things in my heart that was kind of stopping healing, coming back for me. I was trying to escape. I was trying to flee. I was trying to get away from what I knew. And so in God's kindness, he was bringing me back home to heal things in my heart and my mind and my soul.

And so the Lord kept dealing with me about the church. I ended up going, finally. I came to the last, it was like another team night, and the Lord was like, you're going to be here. And so that was the beginning of this process. And so I remember hearing the vision of our church and it was like, take people from corporate accounts of God to daily personal encounters of God. And I was like, okay, that's, I'm gonna be honest. I was like, that's general. I remember saying that. I was like, that's a general vision, you know? And the Lord challenged me. He was like, take it personal, take it personally. And I had amazing people. I remember just meeting Pastor Jasmine and meeting all these other people who were just walking with me. And I started to daily encounter. And one of my life verses is 2 Corinthians 3, 18, like beholding him like a mirror with unveiled face and being transformed from glory to glory. And that's what was happening with the daily encounters. Like every time I. would go before him and encounter him, because I wasn't daily encountering before. And the Lord was like, this was the key you've been praying for the whole time, of your deliverance, was daily encounters. It was a thing that you needed the most,

and you weren't having it. And every time I would go to him, every time I would seek him, he would change me. Like the things that I desired, I no longer desired. And the moments early on, when I would stop daily encountering, the things would come back. They were like, hey, I'm here. And it's like, no, no, no. Like I said, oh, this is important. Daily encountering, being before the Lord, face-to-face, transforming you, is what he did for me. And I remember some conversation we had, and he was like, hey, who knows everything about you? And I was like, uh-uh, I've never shared anything. I've always been kind of close to the chest, never really shared anything. And it was what I needed for the next step of my freedom journey. And it was to testify, to share my story with someone. And I remember every time I shared with someone, I got more freer, I got freer, and then I got freer. Because the enemy wants you to keep it. He wants you to hold it. He doesn't want you to share anything. He doesn't want you to testify of God's goodness, and he doesn't want, he doesn't at all, he wants you to shut up, and just to assume the lies that he's been telling you. To keep it hidden, to keep the shame.

To keep it hidden, to keep the shame. The hiddenness keeps the shame. Yes, and so that was the journey of what God did in me, was daily encounters, and walking with people, and having community in my life. So I could be honest, I'm like, hey, I'm struggling, I need y'all to pray for me. It's trying to come after me. I remember many times I would call you, I would call Pastor Led, I would call all my friends. I'm like, pray with me now, because I know freedom. I've experienced freedom, and the enemy's trying to take it away. He's trying to sell me something other than what the Lord has did, and what Jesus provided for me with his blood. And it's just been this beautiful journey to see other overcomers come alongside, and be like, hey, I got delivered from this too. Hey, I'm like, oh my God, it's a bunch of us. Right, yeah, it's a whole bunch of us. In a world that doesn't say that. Yeah, I literally, I pretty consistently will have people come up to me on Sunday at church, and people who that's part of their journey, things that they're believing for freedom from. And when they come to our church, it's so fun. I'll start to testify, and then I'll be like, you need to hear from somebody else.

There's hundreds of people here who've experienced the same thing. I love that there's so many of us that are testifying and getting loud about this part of our testimony. Heather Schott here, and I'm the founder of The Justice Reform, a nonprofit answering the cry for justice by bringing reformation from city to city. Human trafficking is one of the greatest injustices of our time. Right now, there are fewer than 700 long-term restoration beds nationwide, yet hundreds of thousands of slaves are trapped in sex trafficking and are in desperate need. Dallas-Fort Worth ranks among the top US cities for trafficking cases. That's why we're currently building the first justice residence in Fort Worth, Texas, a state-of-the-art, first-of-its-kind, long-term restoration home that will house up to 100 women rescued out of human trafficking. The Justice Residence is a biblically-based and presence-driven facility that will help hundreds of women find hope, healing, and full restoration. From medical to professional counseling and learning career trades, these women will get the help that they need

to succeed and to thrive in life. They will enter as survivors, but they will leave as reformers. We get to be a part of the solution in helping write these women's freedom story. Isaiah 61 says, I've anointed you to set the captives free and to bind up the brokenhearted. Now is the time to be a part of the solution. So I'm asking you, will you partner with us? Become a monthly donor and be a part of the solution to ending human trafficking. When you become a monthly partner, you are helping steward each woman's nourishment, healing, and redemption. It takes everyone to lift and to give, to care for all of these women. So to give and to receive updates on the Justice Residence, you can visit thejusticereform.com slash partner or text the word partner to 59090. Join us in this fight and give today and let's carry the torch of revival and reformation into every city. Get loud, Mark. What's your journey been like? What has God done in your life in this? Yeah, it's crazy. Listening to your story, there's so many similarities of where God met me in moments.

Even the way that you communicated phrases, Jay, I'm like, yes, that's what God did in me. But similar to what Jay was saying, I grew up in church my whole life. I jokingly say, I'm not a PK, but I was like PK. My parents would be the last people in the parking lot talking to other people in the church, and they'd be locking the church doors. You're an honorary. And then we'd be there for 30 more minutes while my family would talk, and then we'd just be playing outside. You put your time in before you were a Ted. Exactly. Honorary PK. Honorary PK. But yeah, so I grew up in church, and what I love to communicate to people is that my parents didn't just say they were Christian. They loved God. They knew the Holy Spirit. So it was not uncommon for times in my childhood when my mom would just be like, no, the Holy Spirit said you can't go over to that friend's house, or you can't do this. And we just knew that was normal, because they didn't just go on Christmas and Easter. My parents loved God. And so we grew up in a household that loved God, and we served the house of God. So I remember being 15. I went to youth summer camp and just got wrecked with the presence of God, got filled with the Holy Spirit. And I knew in that moment that I was called to ministry. I didn't hear necessarily the Lord speak to me, but I just knew that there was a call on my life to be in the church and to serve the church full time, like vocationally. And that's when I started speaking in tongues.

I got my own prayer language, and I was just so passionate about being in the house of God. And I also knew I'm just a planner. You guys know this. You guys are learning. You're meeting me first time. But when that happened, I was like, cool. This is my plan, God. You called me to ministry, so I'm going to finish high school. I'm going to finish high school. It comes and wrecks all of your plans. Exactly. That's true. But I was like, I'm going to finish high school. I'm going to go to Bible college, and then I'm going to work for my church. And that's like into the sunset, the rest of my life, that's what I'm going to do. And funny enough, I did exactly all those things. I graduated high school. I went to Bible college. I ended up getting an internship with my church and working part time. I worked there for about a year, and then through this crazy prophetic word that the Lord gave me, I ended up moving to North Carolina, and I started working for a church there. But similar to what you're saying, the whole time I was living a double life. So I just had this sin in my life that I just tried to push away. Like I thought that if I could just run away from it and like let nobody know and just lock it in a corner, like one day I'll be free. And the lie was when I get married, right, when I have my wife, then like all this stuff will go away because I'll be married and I'll be fulfilled and like my sexual desires and it'll be fine. That's such a lie.

Such a lie. It really, really is. A common lie. Any type of sexual sin or addiction or anything, the enemy says that to everybody. Like, oh, once you get married, all of that temptation will go away, and it's like double down. Yes. What happens instead? What? What happens instead? The devil really does not fix any of that. It brings all of those issues now into the marriage. And now the marriage, you're either hiding and lying from your spouse or you can become abusive to your spouse. There's so much disunity that takes place and it amplifies for sure. And so this whole time I was just living like this double life. And it's wild because I knew I was called to ministry. I was actively pursuing what I felt like and believe was the call of God in my life. I was going to church every Sunday. I was working full time in ministry. But this was just this sin that I tried to compartmentalize and pretend wasn't there. And if I look back on my life, as far as like when I was younger and maybe where this entered, I don't have a moment necessarily where I was sexually abused or anything like that. But commonly as a child, what would be spoken over me was, is you're too emotional. You're overly emotional. You need to get over your emotions. You need to toughen up. You need a thick skin. And I recognize that when that would be spoken over me, my response oftentimes, because like Jay was saying, the people that were saying that were often men.

They were speaking over me. You need to toughen up. You need a thicker skin. And so then I would look at their lives and I would say, well, I don't want to be rude. I don't want to be mean like you are. I don't want to be dogmatic like you are. I don't want to be not compassionate like you are. And so at a very young age, probably like similar, I would say I was a little bit older than you are, probably like eight, nine, 10. I began to just reject what I felt was inherently masculine. And I couldn't in the moment, I couldn't communicate that. Like I couldn't say to you that I didn't want to be manly. I just knew that the people that I saw as examples oftentimes were like, well, I don't want that in my life. And so I began to reject it and it even expressed itself like as I got older and I began to experiment with clothes and fashion. Like I loved fashion, but I would wear things I wouldn't. I never wore dresses. Like I never went that far because I still was in church. So there was a line that I was playing right of like, I had to look like I still loved God. Right. But I would paint my fingernails. I would wear things that would intentionally get a reaction out of people because I was like bucking this. Like I don't want to be masculine. I don't want to look like a man. Similar to what Jay was saying. Like that meant that most of the time in high school, I had friends that were girls. Like I was spending time doing more girly things, like more artsy things, which they're

not inherently that way. But for me, like that's where I found these groups of girls that I just felt more comfortable with. Like it wasn't this intentional. You know what? I'm rejecting masculinity. So I'm going to be friends with girls. with. I always gravitated towards them. So as I got older, when I was working for the ministry in North Carolina, 2020 hit. And I know this has hit for a lot of people, but I didn't know, having been raised in church my whole life, I didn't know how to daily encounter. So I loved the presence of God. I loved being in the house of God, but I didn't know how to encounter the presence of God myself outside of that. I didn't have any kind of discipline with the Lord of like daily reading the Bible or daily worship or anything like that. So when 2020 hit, my life basically just fell apart. And what was always just like a secret sin of pornography and masturbation before meant like in 2020, I fell so deep into it. I started downloading like apps and started chatting with people online. And it got to the point where like I was meeting up with people that I met on these apps, like strangers having sexual encounters while I was still full-time working for this church. And because I grew up in the house of God and my parents are incredible, they love God. They are incredible parents. All of my siblings still serve the Lord to this day, which is to me as a marker of their faithfulness. I knew what was right. I knew that this was wrong. I knew it was not what God had for me. And I was like, this is not the plan and the purposes. But I also knew that because I worked for a church, I was held to a higher standard. I was like, I'm in ministry, ministering to people. I'm held to a higher standard and I'm not living to that. And so really like the guilt and the shame that was on me from this hidden life became so much that I was like, I'm just going to leave. Like I'm going to get another job. I'm going to take myself out of ministry. And the thought was at least if people find out what's hidden in my like secret life and everyone around me finds out, right, I'll at least still be able to pay my bills. Because my thought was if I work for a church and people find out, I'll get fired. So then I'll be in North Carolina. I won't be able to pay anything. So I left there and got another job where I was working remote and still stayed involved with the church. But I just like was like, well, okay,

I'll get my life kind of figured out this way. And kind of in that process, I had some friends of mine that heard about mercy culture and they were like, hey, you need to hear about mercy culture. You need to like hear about this place. God's doing something. And I was like, okay, okay, whatever. Like I was interested, but at the time I was off social media. So I really didn't know much about what God was doing here. And then around the beginning of 2022 or yeah, 2022, I just felt this stirring to leave North Carolina and like move somewhere else. And I tried to, honestly, to move to Montana. I was like, I'm going to drop off the grid and be like a hiking guy out there. Like run away, just run away. Just like really truly. I was like, I'm going to get rid of social media. I'm going to get rid of my phone. That'll help me. I won't be struggling with porn anymore if I get rid of my phone. And like, truly, I was like, I'm going to escape from all of this and it just never worked. And so then finally, one of my friends was like, I think you should go to Texas. And they knew nothing about the church. Like they did not know anything about mercy culture. They knew nothing about what's happening here. They just randomly were just like, I could see you really living in Texas. And for whatever reason, something in my spirit jumped. I was like, yes, and I'm going to mercy culture. And so in the beginning of 2022, I fasted. And this is crazy to me. This just displays the mercy of God because I'm actively in bondage. Right. And I decide I'm going to fast and pray and ask if God will bless my decision to move. That is crazy. Why wouldn't I fast and pray for deliverance? But I was so concerned about like, will you bless this decision? Let me stop my whole life and fast and pray for this mercy. And you know what the crazy thing is? He spoke to me. He gave me an answer. He's so kind. And so he basically said, if you stay, I'll bless it. And if you go, I'll bless it. And I said, if you're letting me go, like if you're giving me the choice, I'm going to go. So I'd never even been here. Never visited the church. That is so funny. Never come to Texas. But I was like, I'm moving. So I ended up coming and visiting the church for the first time in March, just to like, make sure I liked Texas before I moved my whole life here. And then I was planning to move in July because that's when my lease was up and my job was remote at the time. So like, it didn't really matter. But at this point I was invested in what God was doing here. So I'm watching online and it was the Sunday after Roe v. Wade was overturned. Pastor Lynn and preached a message entitled the innocence war. And I remember I pulled it up on Monday in my lunch break, which if you know anything about mercy culture services,

they're not lunch break long. They're like three hours. But I put it on and I remember watching it in my living room in North Carolina and Pastor Lynn and got to the altar call. And I was like, more than anything else in this life, God, I want intimacy with you. I want to know you. And I realized that my lack of innocence is destroying that. So whatever you have to do, like I want you. And I remember weeping on my living room floor. And I was like, like, I just, whatever you have to do, I'm ready. Like whatever you need to do, I don't care. I want you more than anything. And I knew in that moment that I had to expose my life. Like I had finally come clean. And so the friends of mine who actually introduced me to Mercy Culture were at this time, they were living here. They had moved and they were a part of the church. They still are to this day. So I texted them and I was like, hey, I need to call you this week. Like, do you have time? We set up a phone call and I ended up calling them. And I just exposed everything in my life. It was the first time I was fully authentic. And I said, this is the fullness of who I am. Like, please help me. I think it was the first time I'd ever asked for help because always before, like I'd shared that I struggled with this, but I had always been in the past. It was like, oh yeah, I used to struggle with that while I was still actively bound. But this was the first time I said, this is everything. Please, I need your help. Like, please help me.

And then from there, it was really a journey. Like, I remember I got here, I started daily encountering and I would like slip up. Like something would happen and I'd fall back into sin. And I remember these moments where I was in my daily encounter trying to encounter the presence of God. And it was like, he would stop me and he'd be like, I'm not moving forward until you expose this. Like, you're here, you wanna move on, you keep trying to move on. And he'd be like, I'm just gonna wait right here and I'm not gonna move any further until you go expose this. So then I would be like, oh gosh. So then I would go and I would text my accountability and be like, hey, this happened. Hey, I need your help, whatever. And ultimately it was this fear of like, now that I've encountered your presence, now that I know that I can have you every single day and I can know you intimately, it was like, I don't wanna do anything that would stop me. And ultimately the way that the Lord showed me and taught me to live in the light was the fear of losing his presence. I would rather be uncomfortable, I'd rather expose myself and humble myself and tell somebody all the bad stuff that I did

than lose the access to his presence, lose his voice in my life because now that I've had it, I can't go back. And so then it was just this journey of like, step by step he would deliver me more and more and more. But I had this wild moment. So that was, that moment of deliverance that I had in North Carolina was in June of 2022. And then later that year in November, the Lord brought me into a fast. And while I was on the fast, I heard the Lord say, you're delivered from homosexuality. And I was like- Come on. Excuse me, can you say that one more time? Did I hear you correctly, God? Can you say it in a loud audible voice and send thunder and lightning? I know I'm new to this, but I don't think that makes sense. Because in my flesh, like I'm still struggling with the desire- Temptations. The temptation of same sex attraction. Like I'm still attracted to men. So I was like, I don't, how can you say that I'm delivered, but I'm still struggling with this? And then it was this process of the Lord showing me that the deliverance is not the absence of temptation. It's the ability to steward freedom on the other side.

Yes, sir. It's the ability to say no when the temptation comes. And so before when the temptation would come, I would just fall into it. And I was, I felt bound. I tried everything in the natural, right? I tried everything that I could do, practical things, getting rid of devices, locking, all of that. I tried and I couldn't get free. But now on this side, because the Lord delivered me and I partnered with it by telling on myself and telling about the sin and temptation, now I was able to walk in that freedom. And he showed me that that's what deliverance is. It's not the absence of attraction to same sex. I love how Landon, he always says this. You don't get to choose your temptation. You don't get to choose it, but everybody has one or multiple, and it's your response to that temptation. And the temptation doesn't mean that you're bound in something. It's the thing trying to get you back to where you're a slave to it. It's always like an invitation. Would you come back? Would you come back? But how you filled it is like, no, I have a new lover. His name is Jesus. And so when you fully allowed Christ to come back in as that new lover, that void didn't have to be filled

anymore that empowered you to be able to respond to say no to something that wasn't your lover anymore. And so the enemy still, like what you're saying for people that are listening, will still try to come and tempt you with things all the time, but it's like, no, I'm going to choose the one that I love. I'm going to choose freedom. And so I think it's so key for people listening right now, just because you're tempted does not mean that you're not free. It does not mean that you're not free. It means the enemy is so afraid of the freedom walk that you're on with Christ and what you're going to do to the kingdom of hell. Sometimes even after those deliverance or freedom moments, the temptation can seem more extreme because hell is afraid that you are actually spiritually growing and you have fully engaged in a walk with Christ now. And so I also think that's just important for people to understand like those deliverance moments, just be ready and you're not afraid. you just know he's gonna come knocking at your door, and he's gonna come knocking at your door right away to be like, no, no, no, don't choose freedom. Don't choose, stay slave to me, stay slave to me. And that's where it's like, no, we're not opening the door to that anymore. And then if you do, like you said,

have a slip up, repentance. It's so beautiful that you're just like, wait, I'm not gonna walk in shame and have to go fully dive into this whole realm of sin for a month or a year and lose myself. I'm gonna kneel, I'm gonna repent, and I'm gonna get up and I'm gonna serve him. I'm gonna love him. Yes. Yeah, and if I could just add, I think this house, Mercy Culture here does such a good job of modeling mercy and repentance. Like I watched leaders expose things in their lives of like struggles and then be met with mercy. And so being here, it was like, I knew that like, ultimately I trusted God that if for whatever reason I needed to be repositioned like with my leaders or whatever was going on, like serving areas that I would expose to my leaders, I trusted them, but I was always met with mercy. Like this mercy of like, you're coming in repentant. Like we're not discovering this and we're having to like sit you down. It's like, you're exposing this. And I was like, I would much rather that and trust God with the outcome. But this house meets you with mercy. And that's scripture. And I love it.

That's one of my favorite verses. And I love that I've gotten to be on the receiving end of this. And I love that I've gotten to lead people through this with this scripture, but it's in Proverbs and we'll put it on the screen. But it says, those who conceal their transgressions will not prosper, but the ones who repent and confess will find mercy. So powerful. That's the scripture. And so we're getting to live in that, you know? And at the end of the day, it's like, the Lord is the one who does that, who rewards that. I've found that in the moments where I confess and repent, it's like, I will feel his kindness. It's not about getting invited to sing on a stage or not, or being resorted to ministry, but it's like, I want to feel the pleasure of God again. That's the thing that means the most to me is that I get to find the kindness of God, his smile on me again. Whenever I live in a place where I'm exposing, bringing, revealing, bringing things into the light. So I love both of your stories are full of these moments where like, you're having to live in the light. You're choosing actively to live in the light. And that's like the breaking point, the breakthrough moment for both of you is living in the light.

I think that's major. Paul, where history is about to be made. Barack Obama is legalizing gay marriage in Minnesota. This morning, the Supreme Court recognized that the constitution guarantees marriage equality. I was a young minister, and I was seeing all of these young people struggling with homosexuality and same-sex attractions, and nobody was talking about it. It was this taboo subject. And I was grieved in my heart because I saw so many people struggling that needed help. And they were looking for spiritual leaders to help them, to teach them the Bible and to stand with them. So I began to ask the Lord, give me your heart and your mind for sexuality. I spent a multi-year journey seeking God, studying God's word. Gay awareness is a Bible study. It's a Bible study of the heart of the father and the mind of Christ. It's a story of deliverance. It's a story of righteousness. It's a story of freedom. There are so many different individuals that are following Jesus and living successful Christ-centered lives by denying their flesh and following Jesus. Gay awareness will help you learn what the Bible says and equip you to live a holy life.

Gay Awareness by Landon Schott, available now on Amazon.com. Cheyenne, I've been able to be in your story, in the mix with you over the years of you learning what it looks like to live in the light and ultimately getting to walk in freedom. You're married. You guys are living a beautiful life together, but tell us about your story. What's your journey been? Yeah, so similar. I grew up in the church. My story's a little different. My mom was really the one involved in church. My dad had a different background, so he didn't really come to church, but he does believe in God. He loves the Holy Spirit and he's on his own journey today. And they're beautiful. They're in love. They raised us so well. Our house was full of love. And ultimately, just two people figuring out how to obey God and raising kids in that process. And so I also was a really strong-willed child, if you could imagine. Oh, not at all. Wow. Surprised. No, I wouldn't have guessed that.

So just bless them for their ministry of raising me. I'm a little scared of the children. I will have to start on the other end. When you deal with yourself and your children. Your kids will be very passionate and organized. Praise God. Praise God. Yeah, so I'm grateful. for that. And so I grew up in a house that loved God. Our church was beautiful, loved the presence of God, taught us to encounter God daily and have a personal relationship with Him, and saw the gifts of the Spirit, was filled with the Holy Spirit at a young age, and loved His presence. At the same time, I remember going to a friend's house. I was around, I think, nine or ten years old, and we were left unsupervised. And she showed me pornography for the first time, and it was lesbian pornography. And it was the first, like literally my first sexual encounter at all. And so I was, like, shocked, and my world felt, like, completely upside down. I remember just feeling like trust was broken with my parents and people that, like, why does this exist and I don't know anything about it? Like I knew it felt wrong in the moment, but I didn't understand. I felt like I had to pretend like I knew to feel, like, I kind of wore that badge a lot as a kid, like, oh yeah, I know this, I know this. And I didn't. And so it just led to a spiral of shame that came in, feeling like I had to have the answers and figure it out on my own, and started to explore pornography and masturbation on my own. And that led into years of bondage for me and a struggle. Similarly, I was in the church serving, living a double life, trying, but living this beautiful life of bringing it into the light, having moments of repentance, feeling like I had deliverance and breakthrough, and truly experiencing that at times, and then struggling with temptation and not having a, I would put on this front of, like, I'll share just enough to feel like the people around me think I'm being authentic. Like, it would be enough. It would be a lot, but it would, I would reserve a portion of like, but that part, they won't, they won't accept me if I share all of it. Um, and I think as a woman, as a young girl in the church, this is a big thing to talk about because I remember

summer camps where we were separated in rooms and they would say, guys, go over here because you struggle with sexual sin and girls, you're going to come over here and we're going to look in the mirror and tell you you're beautiful and you have identity issues, which is like needed. I get it. But at the same time, as a woman, as a woman struggling, so many alter times where men are called forward for pornography addiction. And I'm like, when's the woman's altar call? We just all get in on it. And so many women struggle with pornography and masturbation, the same sexual sins. Yes. And then it creates the shame of like, Oh, well now I really can't, if this is the place to get free, I should be in the wrong room. And now I'm confused. And now I'm, Oh, I'm more of a masculine woman because I must have this drive. The other, like women don't have, and what's wrong. Like, it's just a spiral of if the one place I'm supposed to be able to be like free and unashamed is saying something's wrong with me inadvertently, then I I'm struggling internally. So I really started to hide it and just feel like, okay, I got to figure this out on my own. Um, and it led to just honestly, looking back, I would say overall, I had to struggle with sexual sin. It wasn't just homosexuality for me, but it opened a door to this codependence with women. And because I had seen lesbian pornography first, because it was a girl, a friend of mine that showed me, because then I was making girlfriends that were closer. There would just be like some relationships that were a little off and I could see the enemy's hand coming in to give me temptation and just like open doors for like, you should ask to do this. You should hang out here. You should do these things. And so, um, it created this, this codependency. And ultimately I remember a moment in high school, um, a girl moved in next, like a few houses down. And I started giving her rides to school. Um, cause I had a car and, and it was just started as innocence, friendship, just giving her rides. Um, so she didn't have to take the bus. And a friend of mine and I actually found her journal and she had written a letter to her parents saying that she was gay. And in that moment, when I read it, it was like a hook in my chest. Like I describe it as this manipulative spirit that came into my chest as this, like you're, she's gonna, this is going to be the moment. Like you guys are going to be together. And it was, it was a demonic spirit that I partnered with. And in that moment I just knew I wanted to do everything in my power to create in a moment to see if she would be interested. Um, and I remember backing up just a little bit when I was a little girl after I had struggled. Uh, I remember the voice of the enemy speaking to me

and telling me, you are always going to struggle with this. and no man will ever find you desirable. Remember, bring those words from the devil. And honestly. Hi, it's me, it's her husband. Yes, come on. And I remember that same hook in my chest, like, oh, I'm gonna prove this voice wrong. And it was a manipulative spirit, that like, yes, that voice was a lie, but I didn't have the tools of scripture and things to know how to combat the lie. And so I started to just pursue, like, I'm gonna be desired. I don't care who, I don't care how, but I'm gonna be desired. And that was the same hook that came in on that day. Like, I'm gonna see if she finds me desirable, which ultimately led to a slew of sexual sin and just a double life that was super hard to get out of. We tried to be friends after that, and it was just always this open door. It was impossible. We had crossed too many lines, too many boundaries. And so ultimately, through the mercy of God and services, I just started to feel the Lord, similar to what Mark was saying. It was like, I would get to this. I don't wanna talk about other things with the Lord. I'd be wrecked.

And he'd be like, let's talk about this. Like, I'm not gonna go anywhere until we address this. So I brought it into the light and confronted her, let her know, like, hey, this is what's happening. I can't do this. I always knew, like, we never once kept it, made it public because I always knew in my heart, like, this is not God's will. I'm not ever gonna be married to a woman. I wanna have kids. Like, there was a, I knew in my core of who I was that that was not God's will, but the temptation was so strong and so struggled. But ultimately, through encountering God, being in his house, staying planted, staying in his word, it was not one crazy moment of deliverance for me. It was those micro moments of like, I got freedom today and I can make a right decision today. And I think something that's important to talk about is like, when temptation comes, what is your plan? Like, knowing what we know about the enemy, having a plan and step. Like, okay, so I'm like, okay, pray in the spirit, call my people, get prayer going. Like, there are steps to do. And I write about it. So in my book, we- Your book? My book, I wrote a book, which is crazy. So yes, there's a lot more to the story

and I'd love for you all to read and find freedom. But ultimately, I share practical steps and guides here. Like, get around people, bring it into the light, pray in the spirit, like, surround yourself, set yourself up for success and freedom. And don't just be okay with a measure of freedom, but get all the way free. Something Mark and I say all the time is we're not just free, we're free-free. That's right. Like, we are free-free. And there is so much power in our testimony. And so I've just seen the goodness of God. Like, what I thought when the enemy said, you will never, it'll always be hard, you'll never be able to find anyone desirable. Like, they'll never find you desirable. It was a bloodline thing. Like, it was a moment of like, I can look back and see where the enemy has played his hand too far in the women in my family. And failed marriages, divorce on all sides as far as you can go back. And God told me he was gonna restore. Like, I heard the voice of the enemy, but so often in encounters through prophetic words, through time with the Lord, I had visions of my kids. I had, like, he would speak to me about marriage and family. And it was actually a message you were preaching, Pastor Jasmine,

on Caleb and Joshua going into the Promised Land. And it was, they went out as the spies in the land, and they came back, everybody else scared in their boots. They came back and they said, God said we're gonna take the land. All we gotta do is take the giants out. But everyone else's perspective was, there's giants, we can't go. So the very thing that looked like an obstacle was the provision for the land. And so when you preached that, I literally saw a vision of this book in my hands drop into my lap from the sanctuary. And the verse on the first page, it's the woman, Mary, it said, she who's been forgiven much, loves much. And the very thing that you think will be the obstacle to your promise is the giant to take down, and it's the provision. So God told me in writing this book, like, when you write this book, it will be the provision for the Promised Land, and the Promised Land is marriage and family. And on the other side of the testimony, I'm standing, God wrapped it up in a beautiful bow, brought Mark along in the process of writing this book, getting healed, getting delivered, set free. As I'm writing, just like Jay said, every time you share, there's another measure of freedom. And I kind of just want to shut up.

Oh, I'm so proud of you, I'm gonna shake you. It's crazy. It's so beautiful. Oh, God has been so. faithful. And the very thing I thought like, and had the most shame about is literally the banner over the enemy's camp. And like, we will shake hell with our children and bloodlines will be forever changed because we made choices to be free. And now like, not like that's a testament to my parents, what they raised us in, like what the enemy meant for evil in all those generations. Like we get to stand in today, start a healthy marriage and say, we're not doing it. Like we are stopping and our kids will be freer than we are. Yeah, that's right. They will never have to go through the things that you guys had to go through to acquire that freedom. They're going to be born in that place of freedom that you guys fought for. And I want to highlight something in all three of you as you're sharing. We use the term because it's biblical exposing, but the vulnerability. And this is what the enemy attacks so hardcore that all three of you said, we chose to be vulnerable. We chose to be transparent. We chose to be real and expose the temptation, expose the things, even though the enemy was like, no, hide it, hide it, hide it. And I want to highlight the other side is I can speak for mercy culture. Landon and I have lived that life. Like I wrote my book years ago and the Lord gave giving that dream of all of these stacks of books and all of these books would be written on people's testimonies and stories because that's what brings freedom. So the picture that's so beautiful here is a church and leadership and pastors, worship leaders, everything, all the departments, vulnerability and transparency creates a healthy atmosphere for then other people that are hearing the voice of the Holy Spirit to be able to say, you can do this, be transparent, be vulnerable. And that allows like this freedom that we're talking about when everybody is vulnerable from the top down, no matter what our past are, but exposing that sin and bringing it forward, let's other people actually have the freedom to be transparent, vulnerable to walk in freedom. And so like, what would you guys say to encourage people in that? I would say, because when I think about, and I have many conversations and I see it all the time, those who are in that lifestyle, they feel like they can't be vulnerable. Like they can't tell anyone, or they've told someone in the church before and leadership didn't know

how to handle it or to create a space because they weren't vulnerable. The leadership wasn't vulnerable what they went through. So then they didn't want it to, you know, it's just like a constant cycle. And I agree. Like if you, if you create the atmosphere of vulnerability and honesty and operating under the father of lights, it allows the light to be shined on those children, the sons and daughters, they can come into the fullness of the light. Cause I've seen you guys walk in the light and it, it does something and that's like, well, I want to, I want that too. I want that as well. I want to, I want to, I want to shine in the light of God as well. So I would say I had a, I had a pastor, unfortunately one time, tell me, I wish you didn't tell me. Cause I have to do something about it. No way. Oh, that hurts. So healthy, healthy church, find a healthy pastor. And I can't like, there's a, the celebrating of freedom. It's the, it is the thing you think that like we're saying, Oh, you'll bring it into the light and it's going to be hard and no one will know how to deal with it, but that creates shame. But when you celebrate freedom, it creates this step where it's easy to be free about these little things. And then it's just the culture and we celebrate it and we cut, we catch the little foxes before they get big. And if you build a, an atmosphere of shame, then it's creating literally terrible scenarios for people to hide, hide, hide, hide, hide until it explodes. And it's this domino rather than I'm going to take the little thought, the little heart motive I had that was off. And I'm going to expose that and I'm going to expose that. And then it, you live the life of sanctification because you're just getting the little, little things out. And so I'd say like, Jay, seeing this house, celebrate freedom and then actually see like, Hey, this actually works. And we all know we're not perfect. Like there's no pastor, no leader. We're all just going to pretend like nothing's happening. Like it makes no sense. It's so horrible to all be in bondage together. Like I'm not living that way. And I'm so grateful to know like y'all as leaders in this house have people, you have your, your, your accountability, your best friends. Like I am. It's the one thing that blesses me the most is I'm like, I love seeing y'all go on vacation and laugh and have fun with each other. And I know there's no way pastor less is letting you get away with. He's gonna call you out yeah, and I have people like that in my life because it's you've been modeling it from the top-down And so I just think like it's just such a skewed perspective to believe walk around like nobody's struggling with anything Yeah, it's not true. Yeah, if I could just add one more thing

I think it's why this exact thing is why I'm so passionate about testifying is because I distinctly remember I was I think 20 22 years old was the first time I ever heard anybody share a testimony of same-sex attraction and that they had victory Within the church and I grew up in church my whole life Never once has I heard anybody say this was what I struggled with and I've been delivered Yeah, and so I'm so passionate and that's actually why we say we're free free It's because there's one thing to be set free in the Lord deliver you But what we're noticing is is it's different thing to be able to testify Boldly about it and say hey, this was my past, but I've been free literally a new creation So I would even just say like people in the church I believe there may even be people in the church that this was your struggle, but you've never testified about it And it's leaving a gap for people that are struggling to say I don't see anybody that I can look up to and be like I can be like them because the Lord set them free Yeah, my favorite things like pastor Jasmine was saying is coming to this house You could throw a rock and hit somebody with this testimony There's hundreds of people here and it's like when a free free that are free free and one time I heard I'm again, so excited like This is such an encouragement to pastors. Yes, so many pastors think if I bring this up if I teach Everybody's leaving. I'm like, no, they all come because they all want freedom Was one of my favorite things about mercy culture I was like my whole life I've known this is wrong And this is the first church that I've been in while I was there that they have told me that it was wrong from stage And I'm like finally finally you're willing to say the thing that I knew that this is wrong and you're like you're waiting for it Like you're waiting that they're waiting for the truth waiting for that key to freedom I remember like I remember those moments where we look at each other in the eyes. We're like, wow, we're here. Yeah And it's like and it's not it's not a conversion therapy this is not anything This is literally them preaching the Word of God Creating an atmosphere the Holy Spirit to be in the midst and for him to do the work This is not it's thing of like and I was like, wow This is amazing. Like we're in a place where you can host the presence of God. You can bring it home You can have encounters at your house, right and all these things and I'm just like I what I would encounter

I would I would even test it. I would even encourage the pastors testify Testify more share it. Yes as you as you operating your freedom It will create atmospheres of freedom around those that are like that are around you and underneath you Yeah and the last thing that I'll just say on this is that pastor Lennon does such a good job but this is the first house That I've ever been a part of then that says that homosexual sin is just like heterosexual sin Yeah, so anytime pastor Lennon would be like, yep Homosexuality is wrong. He'll then followed up by being like and if you're sleeping with your girlfriend I Literally remember saying as a child, I wish that I just struggled with pornography Yeah, it was same set like opposite sex because at least then it would be normal and there's a group I can go to But because we never talk about homosexuality in the church, it's like there's nowhere for me to go and it makes Because this is the worst It's the only one that the blood isn't powerful enough to set you free from That's what that's what we're essentially saying When we don't talk about it when we don't testify about it And when we act like you don't want to touch somebody with a 10-foot pole, right we struggle, right? Correct like we're saying the blood does not work and I remember we did a podcast about this with pastor Landon and I said something about That and people literally got so angry in the comments I got DMS people mad at me for saying that the blood of Jesus is enough So I'm gonna double down Set you free to deliver you to restore you to Whatever from homosexuality from same-sex attraction Yeah, it's a lie that this is the one thing that for some reason Jesus can't just he can't do nothing about it Yeah, where he's just like stopped. It's a lie. It's a religious spirit Because then I experienced literally the same spirit you're talking about in the anti-human trafficking area Like what are you talking about? You didn't go through this so you don't have a voice You were personally trafficked and you keep preaching Jesus over here and you have no idea what these girls have been through Like this is the one thing that Jesus can't heal and restore

And so what you're really tapping into it is a demonic Spirit that comes to it's like you people just step out in faith like man I can get free from this and then that religious spirit tries but like not you though not from what you've done. You're too dirty or your thing is normal, actually, to try to normalize the sin. And this is accepted in culture. And those lies come that there's specific things that God can't set us free from. And I'm so glad you doubled down on that. That is an absolute lie. It's a lie. It's an absolute lie. I'm also, let me tell you another thing I'm sick of. I'm sick of, another thing I'm sick of is this thing that's happening right now in the body of Christ. It's largely being led by progressive Christians. And they're gonna find me in the comments and I might have time for them. But this whole thing where we are saying that the word of God doesn't actually condemn homosexuality. No. It's a whole thing right now where it's like, no, no, no, no. You're a Christian and you struggle with this. It's okay. This is the only, the word of God isn't what they told you. This thing from back in the day,

it's actually different. We're not reading the right Bible. You can't read the Queen James Bible. You can't take the scriptures out. Then all the curses fall on you. Yeah, and so I just want to say, again, I think I said it in the intro, but a man with an argument is always at the mercy of a man with an experience. I remember the conviction that I felt living in a homosexual lifestyle. You can't tell me. I remember the way I wanted to hide. What happened with Adam and Eve, the moment that they sinned against God. They went to go hide. They went to go hide in shame. I remembered that feeling. You can't tell me that the thing that led me to the same feeling is not sin. Jaz, you want to know what's crazy? I was not raised in the church like all of you, okay? Every once in a while, my mom, my stepdad later would take us to a totally dead church. God did not move, did not know God could speak to you, okay? Okay? So like, I didn't know Jesus like all of you. And I'm in my heterosexual sin and I feel conviction and I know it's wrong.

That's where God knows, like he's given us our own spirit that knows between right and wrong. And like every single human being that is going to go and be attacked through rebellion, which is so interesting, you brought up, there was like different key things that were brought up of like, what were the open doors? But like my rebellion brought me into different sin and yours was like hearing these strong masculine men say these things that you don't like, which whatever like could have been wrong and how they said it in the wrong tone and just like not wise, right? But ultimately there was a rebellion in you that said, if you're gonna say it to me like this, then I'm gonna go do what I wanna do. And in the same way that my mom would say things to me of like, don't do this, don't do this, well, don't tell me what to do, I'm gonna go do what I wanna do anyways. And that rebellion is that open door so often in any type of form of sin, like I'm going to go and partner with this demon that's speaking to me because it's gonna feel better when I give into this. And so Jaz, why did I just go off on that? What were you just saying that made me go off on it? I know I interrupted you.

But like, oh yeah, you're convicted and you were raised in the house of God. You were raised in the church encountering the Lord. And so I want to encourage people, when you hear or sense that conviction, this is wrong, like listen to it. Don't let somebody, some wolf in sheep clothing try to rebuild the Bible to make you able to justify the conviction that you are authentically feeling from the Lord. That is deception and it's a wicked thing that's happening right now. Yeah, and I think with this specific thing, it's so interesting to me because we don't have people walking around that are like, I'm a liar, that's just who I am. They don't put it in their profile. They don't say, I'm a gambler. I spend all my money, it's who I am, it's my sexual orientation. But yet, this specific sin, people claim it as their identity. They say this sin is actually now who I am. And it's the way that the enemy gets you trapped. And even in this area on the flip side, like the Lord delivered me, I have to be careful because what I've seen with social media and in my own life is there's a temptation now to still identify with my sin, my previous sin, but on this side, to always bring it back

and say, I've been, hey, this is Mark, but guess what? I was delivered from homosexuality, still tying my identity to what I've been delivered from. Hi, Heather Schott here, the founder of Citizens for Life, where the mission is this, we the people under God are reforming culture to a pro-life culture through awareness, action, and adoption. Citizens for Life, we are not just against abortion, but we are for solutions. One of the greatest solutions we believe for abortion is adoption. Did you know that one of the fastest growing groups that is adopting right now is the LGBTQ community? whenever the body of Christ gives their no, Satan gives his yes. But this is the hour for the body of Christ to arise in the same spirit that Christ adopted us as his sons and daughters. I believe that this is the hour that the body of Christ and Christians rise up in the spirit of adoption and give their yes. Can you imagine thousands and tens of thousands of children being adopted into Christian homes where prayer and the word of God is taught. This would be a revival in our homes, revival in America. So Citizens for Life wants to disciple you in this process. We're partnered with Lifeline Children's Services which is an international adoption organization and we want to assist you. So here's your three call to actions. Pray and ask God for his heart for Number two, give your yes to adopting a child today. And number three, we are asking that you would share your adoption story. Whether you have personally been adopted or you adopted another child, we would love to hear your story and share it with the body of Christ to start an adoption movement in America. To answer any of these three calls to action, you can text LIFE to 59090. I want to break open this part of this conversation real quick because all of you when you were sharing your story, Jaz, I know yours was a little bit more into your teenage years

or was it in your childhood? Yeah, college, yeah. But you guys, it all started in your childhood. Yeah. And you brought up experimentation and there's a curiosity that is in children and I And there's a curiosity that is in children and I believe this is why it's so demonic that the enemy comes to try to attack with whether it's another child that's doing something perverse or whether it's rebellion or whether it's pornography. But like the enemy brings it as we are a child because most parents don't think to talk to their six, seven, eight, nine-year-old about lesbian pornography yet. They're thinking like, oh, when you're 12, 13 and you're a teenager and you're getting, you're not. This is why the enemy comes younger when you don't know, you're curious, you don't understand what you're seeing. Now think about the LGBTQ movement. Now, there's those that are victims of it and of a movement of like, oh my gosh, is this my identity? And they're having these curses spoke over them. And then there's the wicked agenda of the movement and even some of those that are leading in it. And it's, isn't it interesting that they're in libraries with children for reading hour. They're in schools. They're trying to get it into sex ed when they're in third grade. What? Because I can literally try to rewrite your brain and I can insert desires in you. God never did in you as a child, but Satan, what does he want to do? He wants to take your identity. So I'm going to insert things in you to rework your identity in Satan instead of Christ. So hopefully you can never rework them out. And this is why the enemy specifically is coming for children. And, you know, you said we were left unattended and I just wanted to like pause moment for parents and uncles. You have to more than ever with media, social media, everything that's in front of our children's faces can literally mark them and shift their entire life because of what they're viewing and seeing and not understanding that that changes their hunger. It, the enemy comes to attack awe and wonder of God and children. And so if he could taint and like make it perverse, the awe and wonder that God has given children, the simple pleasures of you hugging your friend. If I'm a boy, I'm hugging my friend. That's, that's pure. But if I see, if I'm, if I'm watching a commercial and I see two men kissing and they are in a relationship, I could be like, oh, I hug my friend. Maybe this is what I'm actually, but no, it's actually pure. You and your, your friend, your friendship with your, with your, with your other, with the boy, that's pure. But what you're seeing on media, what they're showing you, it's actually perverse. So it'll make children think like, oh, actually, this is what I'm supposed to be doing. Or maybe this is me. It's like, actually, no, no, no,

that's not you. It's just the ways of the world right now. As parents, you just have to be okay with asking those questions. Hey, when you met, when you said this about your friend, what did you mean by that? I can ask the questions. Yeah. And I'll stand on this, but the church has abdicated their authority because they won't talk about it because the church won't say anything or even parents won't talk about it. Then the enemy gets to put whatever lie they want in there and insert into the blank, whatever he wants to say. It's like, we have to communicate to our children. learn about this so that they can hear what God says first. So they can hear what he says, or if the lie comes up so that they can correct it. But because we won't talk about it, the enemy just gets to have a field day on whatever he wants to say about the area. And people, you know, parents or people may be like, you know, it just feels like it's too early or it's too soon or whatever. And I think the lies that we're still living in the 1990s, like that we're still in the same time where people just go outside and play outside. They're right, they're right. But like, we're not there anymore. That like the enemy, he has, his target has shifted. And so if our target has not shifted, we are officially behind. The last thing I'll just say is I know parents in this house that steward these conversations so well. Like it doesn't look like you have to break down what gay sex is, but ultimately like some of our friends, they just communicate that people are not honoring God with their bodies.

And so when they see that, they're like, hey, you're not honoring God with their, they're not honoring God with their bodies. And it gives them a framework to know that what they're doing is wrong without diving into the details of like all of these different things. You have to teach your kids safe touch with themselves too. Like you brought up masturbation earlier. So if the world is constantly teaching sexuality everywhere, you take a little being that's curious and they think like this is normal, that arouses them, that arouses an anger or a hunger for perverse things. And you're starting in a little tiny being. Can you imagine what they're gonna be in their 20s if that healing or that truth or those conversations from mom and dad, it's like you guys were talking about how the enemy attacked you guys with being silent. But it's just silence, period. It's an attack on parents to be silent. Oh, don't talk about that, that's embarrassing. And they're not there yet. They're so innocent and they don't understand. And pastors, don't bring that up in your church. People are, it's silence on everybody. It's like no godly conversations centered around holiness and teaching your child what is right and what is wrong, even in relationships as a child

and that boys would never do this with boys or boys should never look to a girl like this. You're friends, you're six years old and one day God has the perfect person in marriage. But those are conversations we've had with our kids since they were little, five and six year old. They're already, when they go to school, having these flirtatious feelings and stuff. Okay, well let's talk about that right now. Normal family conversation. If you don't, that curiosity turns somewhere else and it's not gonna be good because like what you said, you weren't taught in those things. So now with video, porn is teaching you what your response should be to other women instead of godliness. And I felt like, oh I shouldn't, my parents didn't tell me on purpose. So they don't want me to go to them because they never brought it up. And so now it's my responsibility to figure it out on your own. So now I gotta go to somebody else to find out more. Yes, and there's a scripture that talks about, blessed are the pure in heart for they'll see God. And I think that's the number one reason that children are targeted because the purity over them leads to revelation. And I think like Jalen was saying, it's that awe and wonder that if it can be robbed

at an early age and even just in family, modeling it in family, the purity of a mom and dad and seeing that in the household, just a normal family conversation, we find God in those pure moments and in the beauty of it all. And I think the enemy knows exactly. I'm gonna tell a story because I just feel like this is like, this is a powerful moment of ministering to families right now. Because if your guys' stories can stop the next generation of children and not just your children but other people's children, you're talking about thousands of lives that are transformed. And so I remember we were on a vacation and we were in Florida on a family vacation and I have the boys, they're real little. Porter was a baby baby. So Preston, I think, you know, must have been like four or five years old or something like that. And there's these Spring Breaker girls that are down the road with like thong bathing suits on. And I see Preston and his face is like, like this, that direction, like in shock. And I'm like trying to realize and then Pepe comes, she's like, Mom, I think you need to have a talk with Preston.

And as she's saying this, it's hitting me what's happening. And so I pull, you know, first of all, Mom, just like rage. And I was like, Lord, help me with love for your daughters down this way that aren't properly dressed right now, you know? And so I, of course, like a good mom that I am, I go down there and I'm like, look, we're on spring break too and we're having a family moment on the beach and I have little boys. Can you go somewhere else with your, with, you know, they're doing the whole whatever, TikTok thing. So I said, go down there, go away. So my boys aren't looking this way. And they're like, oh. Okay, but like a good convo that apparently nobody's had with them of what they are causing for other people. You know what I'm saying? Awareness. And then we had a talk with Preston at four or five years old and he was confused because he just saw it was like stuck of her. He's like a lady. She didn't know because he was so little. She's got a wedgie, a massive wedgie. Somebody help her, she's in pain. I don't know.

He's concerned. He's just too concerned. But we talked about our eyes being for Christ at four or five years old. We gotta teach him that whatever you put your eyes to has to be holy and then your mind is holy and then your being and your actions will be holy and so you guard and you protect your eyes and even if you're concerned about something or it doesn't look right, you come and you tell mom and dad, we'll handle that scenario that you feel like is off or not right. You always come talk to us but we always set our things that are holy and pleasing to the Lord and we've had those conversations with our boys consistently since they've been four years old. You know, because that's the world that we're living in. I remember another time, we're on a walk in Dallas and there's a boy with a guy which was interesting because he wasn't, his face didn't look like a girl. He had a guy's haircut, no makeup on but was fully dressed like a girl. He had like the fuzzy sandals, the booty shorts, a crop top, a pink, hot pink backpack and Porter's like, you know, like saying his moment of like, Preston and in the same way, we paused and we literally stopped our family walk, we had a conversation and we're like, this is how God made men, this is how God made women and this is inappropriate dress but we need to pray for him right now because he's confused

and the enemy is attacking his identity but that's not right, boys don't dress like this, let's pray for him right now and at five years old, he's praying for him but it's bringing clarity where he has a heart for somebody but there's no confusion in him between what's right and wrong and so I would love to just bring this conversation up for you guys right now because I've all got to be a part of your process, you know, and Jay, like I'm so proud of you. It was like a year and a half, it was a year of Reformation and the Lord speaks at MC Conference that we're coming into a year of consecration, Papa Lou Engel is there, it's like releasing this prophetic word and it was a massive year for our house, I don't even think we understood at the time how massive but now what we're walking into, that year of consecration that we all set ourselves apart and just like went after personal Reformation, what are the crooked ways in me, God, straighten them out so that Lord, you can use us for Reformation out there and you came and you're like, God spoke to me, I'm stepping down from the worship team and I'm gonna consecrate myself unto the Lord. I was so proud of you because I feel like people, when they're put on platforms or influential places, would never do that and you were like, no, like I wanna be holy like my king is holy, I wanna set myself apart, I wanna be made ready for anything and everything he's calling me to do and. And to be clear, I just wanna say this for people listening that's like, gotcha, it wasn't because Jalen

got exposed and said, it wasn't like, wasn't any sexual morality, major issue, nothing crazy came up, just wanna be sure people understand that, this was Jalen and the Lord saying like, I'm convicted to just set myself apart for the Lord and not be on a platform. He's like, I'm doubling down on this and I'm consecrating myself, consecration is the process where you set yourself apart to be made holy like he is holy and this was the year that we introduced the value of holiness and our house just pursued holiness. When the world is saying like, holiness is religious, you know, and we're like, no, it's not, it's literally pursuing Christ to live like him. What did this process of pursuing holiness look like for you guys? He led the flock to the far side of the wilderness and came to Horeb, the mountain of God. There the angel of the Lord appeared to him in a blazing fire from within a bush. God called out to him from within the bush, Moses, Moses, here I am, he answered. Do not come any closer, God said. Take off your sandals for the place where you are standing is holy ground. Come encounter God with us at Mercy Culture Conference, October 2nd through October 4th, 2026. It was wild because I remember that moment, it was in an encounter with the Lord and it was the encounter,

I connect with God through conversation. as well. And so, I'm always talking to him throughout the day. And it was this one moment, I was at the office and the Lord told me to go into one of his conference rooms. I'm like, be aware of the Lord. He's always nudging you to do things, follow him, it's fun. But he led me to this conference room and I'm praying. And I remember him saying, will you give me this time? And he gave me, I think it was like three months or something. I don't know, it was nine months. Will you give me nine months? And I'm like, huh? It was just not even on my radar. And he said, yeah, will you step off the platform and minister from singing for nine months to consecrate yourself? I was like, yes. My spirit said yes before I could even say yes. And little did I know, we're literally stepping into the season of consecration and the Lord was lifting me beautifully to strength. It was just this beautiful things of what I once thought, oh, I was good. And he's like, no, there's more layers to this. This is a generational thing, baby. There's things that I want to work out in you for your bloodline, for your family, for you, for your mindset, for your heart. And I had a father problem because of my father. And in this season, the Lord, I gained the perspective of him being a good father. God is a good father when he brings up things that stands in a way between you and him. Before I wouldn't have said that, I'm like, oh, he's punishing, he's condemning, he's all these different things because I had this skewed perception of fatherhood. And I don't know why I'm saying this, but I really feel like for those who are still struggling, he's a good father when he's bringing this up. When you're in their relationship or when you're on that app and you want to go connect and have sexual encounters with somebody and something just inside of you that's like wrestling and that's the father is like, hey, daughter, hey, son, I have more for you. There's something in here that I want to connect with you. And that's the inclination of the father's love for you. It's not this condemning thing. It's him drawing you closer to him. He's not saying come out, he's saying come in, into the home with him. And so that's what I felt even more in that season of him bringing me. And that's when I got the revelation of come in. I had this moment where I saw this vision. There's a prophetic word going out about the 100,000. We know about it and we kind of stewarded as well. So there's a prophetic word that I forgot who was the person. I think it was Lou Engle. I think Papa Lou said it. Yeah.

He said it at conference. He said at conference. Yes. He saw a hundred, someone saw a hundred thousand LGBTQ coming back. A hundred thousand sons and daughters from the LGBTQ community coming to the Lord. And in that season, I'll never forget. I was like, Whoa, it hit me. It hit me in my gut. Like I was like, Lord, this is real. Like I believe this. And I, in that season, I was in a, I was in a moment with the Lord and he encountered me and he brought that back up. And he's like, who would contend for 10 times more? Who would contend for 10 times more, which is a million to come home. And I was just, just thinking about like, Lord, you desire sons and daughters. I'm feeling the desire of the Lord more and more of his sons and daughters coming back to him. And in that season, it was just really of like stripping me of fear of man. I was afraid, like, you know, I was afraid to share my testimony. I'm like, they're going to come after me. Like I, I did not live a very safe life. I was out here whiling in these streets, multiple encounters with multiple people. And I was afraid, um, that they were going to show up in the comments and they're like, no, I remember when you did, or I remember and all this stuff. I'm like, yes. And right now I just want to thank the Lord. I just want to say, I repent, um, for not valuing your bodies, honoring who you are as sons, as daughters. Um, that was not okay with me and the Lord revealed it to me. And there is mercy. There is grace that he's given me for you to encounter God, um, because he loves you. He created you. He, he needed you in your mother's womb. Um, um, and so I'm sorry for, I didn't value as a son of God, I didn't value you, um, like the father valued you. Um, and so I just really thought to do that right now. Beautiful. Powerful. Powerful. Yes. Powerful. Um, I think this is a beautiful vein just to lean into if that's okay. Um, that's such a powerful moment, Jalen. Um, I feel the spirit of the Lord in this room right now. Um, let's pray. Let's pray because I think one, there are so many people watching right now that I feel like Jalen, that moment that you just shared, um, the people

who you have moments with in the past, they may watch that, but I feel like it was for even so much more than just them. That there are many of you watching right now that you needed to hear that from a brother. Maybe you've been stuck in that lifestyle, you're listening, you're like, what in the world is this? And the moment Jalen said that, you felt something shift in your heart. And I feel like it's like Jalen's standing proxy for people who have lived in that lifestyle with you. And you have an opportunity right now to forgive. And I believe in forgiveness as you release forgiveness, that there is even deliverance and freedom coming to you right now. Something that I found a lot in these stories, and we've heard it today, Pastor Heather, you mentioned it earlier, is for some of us who have this testimony, the starting point of it was you were exposed to something, your innocence was taken from you early. For others of you, your innocence was taken from you, you were sinned against, you experienced trauma, sexual abuse, things like that that happened to you at an early age. For me, I experienced sexual trauma and abuse, but it was also just friendships that turned distorted, friendships that started pure that ended up distorted. And I ended up in a homosexual relationship because of that.

And then there's some of you that may be watching that you're like, no, I really was born this way, none of that ever happened to me. And I will say, regardless of who you are, whatever place you land in that list of things, through the blood of Jesus, we still all must be born again. That's still the pathway to the Father for all of us, it's the blood of Jesus, it's the finished work of the cross. And so what I wanna do right now is for all the people watching, I want us to pray for them, with whatever they are, wherever they are in their journey. Mark, will you pray for the people watching who feel bound by homosexuality, the people who feel stuck that were like you, that they're in ministry, they're in the church, and nobody knows that this is their life, but they're convicted and they want freedom. Will you pray for those people? Cheyenne, will you pray for the little Cheyennes who maybe have felt bound and stuck in sexual sin that just need freedom? Will you pray for the next generation, the little Cheyennes, the little Jaylens that need freedom, pray for them. Jaylen, you led us so beautifully in that moment, but will you just pray for that movement of a million people coming out of the lifestyle,

the revival that the Lord has spoken about that he wants to do? Will you pray, and can we just agree for that? And then Pastor Heather, will you just close us out, just as a mama, will you just pray for us in this space? Yeah, start us off, Mark. Cool, let's pray. Well, Holy Spirit, we love you. We thank you for this time that we've just got to testify, Lord. I thank you that your word says that we overcome by the blood of the lamb and are word of our testimony. So Lord, I just pray that as we've testified today that freedom would meet the people on the other side of this screen. Lord, that you'd meet them wherever they are. Lord, you'd meet them in their room, in their cars, in hotel rooms, maybe even while they're traveling. Lord, you'd meet them with freedom in the same way that I encountered deliverance through a TV screen. Lord, I pray that you would do the same for them. Lord, I pray for those who are right now, even just in ministry, they're doing the work of the Lord, but they are bound. Lord, I thank you that your word says that you are faithful to provide us a way out when temptation comes.

So would you provide them a way out? Would you provide them a way out? Would you open a door for them to expose the sin in their lives and to find freedom? And Lord, just like you did in me, would you create a desire for your presence, a desire for intimacy that outweighs the fear of exposing what's in them, Lord? And I pray that they would be met with mercy. Lord, I pray that they would be met with mercy, that even as they expose these things to those around them, that the leaders, that the pastors, that the brothers, the sisters, the family members that are on the other side of these conversations would be met with mercy, that the Spirit of God would fall in those conversations and they would encounter your tangible mercy and your kindness, Jesus. Pray that they would be drawn unto you. Lord, I pray that they would be drawn unto you, that you would fill that space, the lover and the desire of their hearts, that you would be the one to fill it, Lord. And I pray that you would break the chains of bondage. Break the chains of bondage. We say the Lord rebuke you to the bondage of homosexuality. Lord, I pray that like I was met in a moment with deliverance and homosexuality was broken off of me, pornography was broken off of me, the spirit of perversion was broken off of me,

I prophesy right now to the people on the other side of this screen and say perversion go right now, homosexuality go right now in the name of Jesus. Thank you, Lord. And Lord, we just lift up your children, your next generation, Lord, the babies, the toddlers, the children, the teenagers, God. And I pray a divine hedge of protection around them, Lord. I pray you would send them and their parents, you would wake them up. You would wake their parents up, Lord, with a holy conviction and fear of the Lord to steward the gift that you've placed in them, God. I pray distracted parents would be awakened up, that they would see, they would be woken up in the screens they're placing in front of the kids, they would feel a conviction. in the fear of the Lord. The people's houses they let them go to, Lord, they would feel a conviction in the fear of the Lord, that they would begin to ask questions that lead to freedom and deliverance, that they begin to create safe environments for their children, their teenagers to share with them and to be met with mercy, God. I pray, Lord, that the demonic voices would be silenced as they raise up a hedge of protection around their house in prayer and in family conversations, Lord. I even pray for the parents right now, Lord, that feel like they are silenced, God. I pray that they would have boldness and power of the Holy Spirit, Lord, that you would fill their mouths and it wouldn't be intimidating, Lord, but they would know you've chosen them to raise these beautiful babies, God. You've entrusted them and you have given them everything they need as they lean upon you, Lord. I pray, Lord, that every child would be protected, that their eyes would be fixed on you, Jesus, that you would restore innocence in this next generation, God. Throughout our schools, I pray for teachers, I pray for bus drivers, I pray, Lord, for crosswalk people and

all the people entrusted around these kids, I pray a holy conviction in fear of the Lord, that you would remove the unrighteous, Lord, and you would give mercy to those that come to you and are entrusted with the most vulnerable, God. I pray they would have a weight and a fear of the Lord, yes, Lord, protect your children, Jesus. Yes, yes. And Father, we just come right now, just partnering with the prophetic word of a hundred thousand sons and daughters coming back to you. And Lord, even in my encounter, you said, who will contend for 10 times more? So Father, I just pray for a million plus, let there be no cap, let there be no cap to you bringing your sons and daughters, Lord, the way the desire of your heart as a father, penetrate this world, this globe, no matter, not just for America, but for the nations, not just for America, but for the nations. Lord, I pray that your sons and daughters are awakening themselves to the love of the father, the mercy of the father, the grace of the father, and they'll come home. I pray, Holy Spirit, may you come and you saturate and you penetrate every area of the place. Those who are in relationships right now, Lord, I pray, Holy Spirit, that you come and you flood their minds and their hearts to return back to the father. Even right now, Lord, I just pray those who are listening, those who are struggling right now, this is your hour. This is your moment. This is the window where the father is saying, come, come in, come into him, come into his home, come into his love, come find rest, come find identity there. So we just call forth the sons and daughters right now in the name of Jesus to come home. It's now the time. Now the time. Lord, I just pray for all the pastors, the spiritual leaders. I hope that they hear this and they are encouraged in the importance of their voice in the congregants' lives, that they are made aware today and right now the importance and the power of holy communication that breaks silence and breaks demonic forces and powers that has people so just trapped in bondage from sexual sin. Lord, I pray that your church would be a safe place again to talk about anything and everything that the enemy is coming against your people with, that it would be a place of war once again where we spiritually war and engage against spiritual forces in darkness and that we engage together in unity, not in judgment, but in heaven's restorative justice, in heaven's divine healing. Lord, we know that your word says over and over and over again that you healed and you delivered and also says that you're the same yesterday, today, and forever. So we know that you heal and deliver today. So Lord, I pray that your house would be a place of healing and deliverance once again, where signs, miracles, and wonders would take place and people would be set free,

living in freedom, Lord, to set others free. So Lord, I just pray that you would break the bondage off of pastors' mouths, that you would remove the fear and anxiety that they're attacked with, Lord, to not speak out truth. Lord, I pray for parents in this hour to be protectors in their home, to be the gatekeepers of their children, that, Lord, you would put a ferociousness in fathers and mothers to protect once again, Lord, and to have wisdom and discernment. We ask for the gift of discernment and wisdom in parents once again, that that would return to our homes, that we would discern the difference between good and evil and demonic atmospheres and that we would be the protectors of our children so that our children don't have to endure these types of unholy encounters. And Lord, I pray even as Cheyenne was just praying over children, that, Lord, I know that children are so sensitive to the spiritual realm. So I just pray for children in this hour. They're your sons and daughters. They're not ours. They're yours. I pray for discernment in children once again, and that they would run for from scenarios. They would run from scenarios that are unholy, that Lord, you would come and just your grace and power to protect children in this hour with such a wicked agenda that is coming for the next generation. Lord, I pray not only would you anoint pastors, anoint parents and older siblings, but that your presence would be so powerful. Lord, I pray for a vengeance, a holy vengeance around children in this hour that they would even know and discern when their parents don't. And so Lord, we just thank you for this, that this is the hour for the gifts of the spirit. Just feel that the gifts of the spirit to return to our churches and to return to our homes. Lord, come in every way that you do. Lord, we want all of you, King Jesus. Yeah. And father, we pray for every person listening who this is their testimony that they have been set free. Lord, I pray for that free, free anointing that Cheyenne and Mark talked about to fall on them.

I pray for supernatural boldness, supernatural courage to come on them to testify. Lord, your word says in the book of Revelation that we overcome by the blood of the lamb and the word of our testimony and we love not our lives unto death. And so father, I thank you that our testimonies don't belong to us, that they are yours. It says it's the testimony of Jesus. What you have done in us is your testimony. It's what you did on the cross for us to set us free. And so father, I pray you give them the revelation that the story doesn't belong to them anyway, that it's just yours, that it's your testimony, father. And so I just pray that let there be a movement of testimonies being shared. Let it go viral on TikTok and Facebook, but I just pray for a movement of people sharing the story of how you've delivered them, how you set them free. I'm reminded of this moment, I think it was in the early 2000s, Jalen, you might remember this, but there's a guy who was on this video, he's like a black dude, he testified about being set free of deliverance or being delivered of homosexuality. And it turned into a funny meme. People roasted him and made fun of him and it turned into something that people would spread all the time. Like it was funny. And the Holy Spirit just reminded me of it and I felt like that was a moment in our generation where people decided not to testify. We mocked someone testifying. And so father, we repent for mocking that as a generation. And I pray, Lord, would you restore us? Would you bring us back to a place, father, where we testify with boldness, father? I pray that a generation would receive the testimony. We pray for breakthrough in that, in our generation, Lord. And so Lord, we love you. I thank you for this podcast. I thank you for every one of these crazy testimonies, Lord.

We thank you that the blood is still enough, that the blood still works. We glorify you, we magnify you, we thank you for your blood, we thank you for freedom, we thank you for deliverance, Lord. And we just say, come get your glory on this podcast. I pray just for your glory. Come get the glory that's due to you through this podcast, Lord. We love you. In Jesus name we pray. Amen. Amen. I know we're supposed to close out, but we're way over. But I just, I just feel so strong. I love the practicals. And I want to give you each one minute, one minute to give a practical of what did your pursuit of holiness or freedom, like holiness and freedom, look like? What would you practically tell somebody that's listening right now and they say, I want what they have, what would you practically tell them to do? Yes. I would tell them, find someone. Find someone that you could trust to tell all of your story to, everything that you, I mean, do not let a detail out. I know it may be gruesome. It may be a lot to you, but tell them everything. Bring people around you, you know, in a, in a faith body, in the church, like be planted in a good church. Go find brothers and sisters of Christ that you can tell your full story to and share it like be, and be, be just as much as the temptation is coming at you. Be that aggressive against it. So like, like share when the moment's going to come, like those brothers or sisters, you come around like, Hey, I give you, you might seem like a nuisance.

You may seem like a challenge, but I'm like, Hey, this is what I'm dealing with. I have to tell people like literally the details. I'm like, Hey, this is what is happening. And then you worked all the way up to like on platform moments, I'm like grabbing you Jay this weekend. I'm like, Jay testify, but it was never a nuisance. It was never a nuisance. It was never a nuisance because you got people around you that were fighting for you too. Literally. It wasn't a nuisance. Like everyone was with me and it was this beautiful, like we're here. And so I would say that, um, and staying is like literally daily encounters, daily encounters. I really want to read this message of hope to, to you guys. Um, second, uh, first Corinthians six and 11, I'm sorry, nine. Um, or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived, neither sexually immoral, nor idolatrous, nor adulterous, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor the drunkards, nor the revilers, nor the swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God, but here's hope. And such were some of you." So that means back in the day there were people who dealt with these things that you are dealing with right now that were free because what? But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Christ Jesus and by the Spirit of our God. So there is hope that people that there's people who have been through it before that have been set free who was washing who would justify and it's just for you as well, just as much as it was for me. It's good. Yeah. Mark, what's yours? My practical, I love it because Che, you didn't use it as a practical, but you did it.

And that is to fight with the word of God. So when I was walking through this journey, I had scripture everywhere. Like before I would go to bed, it was on my bed, on my pillow. I'd read it every single night. Like resist, humble yourself before God, resist devil and he will flee from you. Like find scripture that you can fight with when the lies of the enemy come, when the temptations come, respond with the word. Don't respond with your own words. Jesus didn't even do that. Jesus responded with the written word. So that's the model that he showed us. That's what we have to show. It's good. And I did just want to submit as we were praying and I'll keep it quick. I know we're short on time, but I believe I had a word of knowledge just for somebody who was watching for whatever reason, a hotel room really just stuck out to me. And I believe that if you, um, either you're on your way to a hotel room, maybe to meet with somebody or you're in a hotel room and you found this, you stumbled upon this. I really felt like God was saying, this is your way out. This is your mercy. And the word that I heard yell in my spirit was run, run, run. There is mercy waiting on the other side of you. If you will run, if you will leave that hotel room right now, he will meet you with your mercy in the same story of deliverance that I have can be your story of deliverance. Come on. Amen. Um, I would say the scripture that really brought me back to the Lord, it's in second Peter and it says, humble yourself under the mighty hand of God now so that at the proper time he can exalt you and whoever you are, whoever you are, there is no better time than right now to humble yourself because at God's proper time, he will exalt you and you never

want to be exalted before God's proper time. And I would secondly just say, obedience is what leads to deliverance. So you don't have to think your way out right now, how it seems far away now, but one step of obedience is what you need to do. And the obedience day in, day out, moment to moment will lead you into your deliverance. It's just obeying God. Don't focus on being delivered of homosexuality. Focus on what makes God smile. What makes God smile? What makes God smile? And from that daily choice, you'll watch your life begin to be washed with the water of the word. You'll be purified and you'll look back a year and say, I don't even hunger for these things anymore because God is still, he has been just telling me one small step every day. And that's how you get free. That's great. Mine would be, uh, I don't know the address, but there's a scripture as Paul speaking, I think it's in Romans and he says, uh, don't make provision for your flesh. Um, and so mine would be, um, you know, the things that lead you into that place, you know, the things that lead you into temptation, you know, the things that, uh, the, the movies, the songs, the places, all of that. Um, I would just say, don't make provision for your flesh. Don't go to those places. Don't watch those movies. Don't listen to those songs. Don't read those books, uh, uh, feed your spirit and build your spirit and pursue pleasing God. And then don't open yourself up to the things that, you know, lead you back into that place. Do not make provision for your flesh.

That's what I would say. Awesome. Yeah. That's the songs and stuff I cannot listen to, to this day and it's okay, I'm good. I'm good without it. I think that's all of us. Yeah. There's songs, there's movies, there's places, TV shows. Uh, I was ministering to a little girl on Sunday. Outfits. Yeah. Yeah. Outfits. Oh yeah. I was ministering to a little girl on Sunday and she was like, struggling with the same sex attraction. We're talking and she was like, I just feel like I can't watch any shows or movies because she's Gen Z. And she's like, and my generation is just everywhere. I was like, great. Don't. Yep. Okay. She just brought up something I just got. She said outfits. Okay. We're going to close this out. But this is so important because what you're putting on is part of your identity. So you can't say I want a life change and then go and keep putting on the old identity because a lot of people get attacked and like, well, if I change the outward and the inward

isn't changed yet, no deliverance can happen a moment, but freedom is a walk with Christ. And so you have to be willing to do the practical things while you're doing the spiritual things that they're telling you to do. So don't go put on those outfits or jewelry or the nails, the pain, like those things were a hook and part of that old identity that you're in freedom out of. Like go get rid of it. That was one of the main things when I started, when I got free out of my homosexual relationship, the whole thing, I didn't even tell you the testimony, I have to watch it on a different episode or something. But when I got set free, one of the main things the Lord told me was my outfits. There were certain outfits that he said, do not wear them. Do not put that on anymore. The Lord was showing me in scripture, we actually were talking about this in our school of worship a few weeks ago, that in every, any outfit change moment that happens in scripture is connected to a season change. So Adam and Eve, they fall into sin, they make an outfit for themselves. And when things shift, when God finds them, he does what? He changes their outfit. Joseph, season change for Joseph, gives him a coat. Like biblically over and over again, outfit changes are connected to a season change. So if you believe you're in a season change and you're walking in deliverance and God is setting you free, then change your outfit.

Yeah, yep. Yes. 100%. It's prophetic. It will help you. It will. Put it on. Scripture talks about putting off the old self, put on the new self. So put on the person, like you're not faking it. You are prophetically saying, I will be free and I'm going to walk in holiness and righteousness. I'm not gonna put on the old stuff that keeps me bound. I'm gonna put on the new self. The other thing is the things that you put on are attraction to old demons and old things. Yes, I was literally about to say, get rid of those undergarments. Go ahead. There's certain undergarments that you have to get rid of. There are certain things that you're putting on, certain perfumes and colognes that you were, what you used to do, you can no longer do. And it's okay to give those up. I'm sorry. Yeah. I just want to add this too. I loved fashion before and that was part of how I expressed the rebellion in my heart. But when I got delivered, I like laid it down

because I was like, oh, I can't be into fashion. But it's like, I just received a prophetic word about the Lord calling me into that space. And so it's not to say that like, if you love fashion and part of how you express that fashion was in a way that's not honoring to God, that might be a gift that God has on your life, but it's in submission to the will and the pleasing purposes of God. So I get to take this desire to fashion and be like, God, what pleases you in my fashion? And then get to express that in a way that honors him. He created it. Right. He created it. Right. I'm sorry. Yeah. It belongs to him, y'all. Inquiring him. Like he has a desire to see how you're dressed. Like he has a desire to put on himself on you. He speaks to me all the time on what things to wear, what jewelry to wear, what things to wear. It's legit. It's real. It's crazy all the time. And you never know, it sparks up conversation with someone. Yes. It's so true.

That then you lead to share the gospel. Let me tell you something. There's this guy. Oh my God, I'm sorry. I love it. We're here. We're in it. We're in it. It's her fault. We're in it. I had them prayed and closed down. Literally? The Lord got me to a place during my journey where he started to change the way I dressed, right? And I was like, well, why are you having me wearing these things? And so I had this testimony. I literally walked with this guy. He's amazing. He came up to me. He was like, when I met you, I was offended with how you dress. This was during the season when the Lord started to have me wear certain things. And he was like, I've never seen a man wear what you wore, like cared about fashion. And it convicted me. And I was like, what is that? But I felt the Lord every time you would worship or you walk around.

And I'm like, what is this in him that is confronting things in me? And I didn't even know. I'm just being God. And he's like, every time you wear this, he literally described what I was wearing. I was like, that's crazy. And it caused him to draw closer to the Lord to see, oh, there was things and structures that he set up, like these false manhood things in regards to the scripture that was never really meant for him. And now this man is walking around. He's dressed a little better. He's asking me what's going on. He's worshiping his crazy God. No, seriously. It's crazy. Okay, seriously, if you would've just been like, oh, I've just got to go to sweat outfits like everywhere I go and like drop that gift of fashion that is on your life. Now you help my husband. I was about to say, except for when he's in rebellion. Cause he sometimes sees you in rebellion. The shorts? We're gonna talk about the shorts? That you tried to pretend that that was approved. You and I did not approve that. That's the last thing. We need clarity.

It's the last thing. You took a picture and you cut off those shorts. Did you approve the shorts? I did not approve those shorts. It was shocking to me. Listen, I was on that Sunday. With the boat shoes that stuck out? Cause he was on a boat. You cut your ankles. If you know, you know. Some of you don't know what we're talking about. We'll put pictures. We'll make sure you have context. Put the pictures on the screen for it. But what I was trying to say is thank God you did not lay down a gift of fashion that God has placed on your life. And with the new fit outfit he gave you, it was beautiful because people in the church see like, oh, he has style. This is awesome. this can be used in other ways for the kingdom of God. Yeah, it doesn't belong to a sexuality. It doesn't belong to any of these things. It belongs to our creator, the one who created it. So it's more identifying what is chained to your old past that you know it's gonna attract things. And this is where people still love their sin. Yes, ma'am. And so they keep the same fit on,

and I'm gonna do the religious thing to look like I'm free, but I'm still in love with my sin, so I don't look any different because I'm still attracting things that I love. And that's why it's so important that the outer part is like, no, it lets the world know. I mean, priests did this. They had specific attire that told the world, I am in consecration. I'm living a life of holiness. And what we put on is a message to people. Yes, it is. It is a message. So if you want freedom, make sure what you're wearing says I'm living in freedom, and not I'm still living in bondage playing. Yeah, something you said one time in a sermon was people are displaying their inward bondage on the exterior of what they're wearing. And I remember wearing like heavy chains, like heavy chains around my neck. And I remember looking back and I was like, I was outwardly displaying the bondage that was happening in my life because I was like painting my nails. I was wearing black and I was wearing these chains that were just like sit around my neck. All right, there's everybody's practicals. There's all your practicals right there. Well, listen, this podcast is wild.

I can't wait for you as you're closing out to just hear everybody's looking at you guys. This podcast was crazy. These two, you got people to go get those two. For hanging out. Thank you for watching. You need to check out these two books. You can get them both on Amazon. This is Gay Awareness by my pastor Landon Schott. And this is The M Word by Cheyenne Berry. Pastor Landon is talking about discovering the heart of the Father in the mind of Christ on sexuality. You want to read this book. If you are a parent believing for a child to come out of homosexuality, if you're a pastor learning how to walk people through breakthrough, or if you're bound in the lifestyle and you want freedom, this book is for you. And then if you want to overcome sexual sin and walk in purity and live in lasting freedom, then you need to read this book by our very own Cheyenne Berry or Cheyenne Bowler, because she married now. Get these two books on Amazon. Thank you guys for hanging out with us. It's been fun. I pray you got breakthrough. I pray you were encouraged in this conversation. This has been an episode of Holy Disruption. We'll see you next time. Thank you for joining me on this episode

of Holy Disruption, where we are awakening the bride of Christ and calling the church back to holiness. You'd like to continue with me on this journey, follow me on social, at Heather Schott, and make sure to subscribe to Heather underscore Schott on YouTube and all podcast platforms.