Love Done Right

Well, good morning, Calvary Church. Everyone doing okay? It is so, so, so good to see you. I am so, so glad that you're here. I want to say welcome as well to all of our first-time guests and all of those watching online. And Daniel just talked about it this month. This is our project, World Changers, for the month of April. But can we give our best welcome now to the men and women watching from our correctional facility via Pando. I love you guys. Pray for you often. You're not a project to us. You are family. And I am so, so, so glad that you're here. We are starting a brand new series through the book of Song of Solomon called The Naked Truth. It's going to be a good four weeks, and you don't want to miss church over these next four weeks. It's going to get a little spicy in here, right? It's going to be great. So, so glad that you're here. Before we jump right in, let me just remind you of this. Directly after service today, we do have Chick-fil-A for you. Come on. I have brought Delran Chick-fil-A to you. It's the only place where you can get Chick-fil-A on a Sunday. Someone say amen to that, right? And I'm so, so glad that you're here. A special thank you to Delran Chick-fil-A. Their owner and operator is here, and they brought some of their team. They sponsored this to make this happen. Can we thank them for doing that? Really, really appreciate them. So support Delran Chick-fil-A, and you'll get your ticket after service. So do that. And then next week, Daniel said it, 40 people taking the next step in faith and water baptism. So don't miss next Sunday. It's going to be awesome. I want to let you know, actually, this Friday, myself and 10 others, we will be leaving on our first missions trip of the year. I'm leading the trip. We've got 10 going to Uruguay. We're going to build church number 35. We're going to literally construct it, the church that we gave the money for. And I'm so, so excited. We're going to be there for a week doing construction. So pray for us. Pray for the team. Can't wait to hear what the Lord is going to do in that experience. All right. All right. Then finally, who wants to hear what happened last week at Easter? Anyone excited about what God did at Easter at Calvary Church? Oh, come on. It was an amazing weekend. Two Good Friday services and then seven total Easter services, three on Saturday, four on Sunday. We had 800 plus slots filled by Dream Team members. Some people serve multiple services to make that happen. I want to say thank you to the Dream Team for that. We had 3,142 people in attendance. And here's my favorite number. Come on, get ready to cheer loud and proud for this. 253 people marked Box B. They marked salvation. Come on, let's give Jesus all the praise.

Come on, every number has a name. Every name has a story. And every story matters to God. Come on, all of heaven is counting, and so we count too. Is that right? And so that's good, good stuff. And so my encouragement to all of those that came last week for Easter, and I already got to meet some of you in the previous services that have come back. Come on, just keep coming back. This Jesus thing is real, and he really will change your life. But you do need a community to be planted in, and we hope Calvary Church is the place for you. All right, here we are in the book of Song of Solomon. It is a powerful book. It's a hard one to understand, so I'm going to do the hard work for you, but I really think you're going to enjoy this. And again, I want to just encourage you, don't miss a single week of this series because it does stack on each other. And so if you're traveling or if you're away, make sure that you watch it online or make sure that you catch up on the podcast after. But before we do that, I want to give just a couple ground rules anytime I preach a message on dating or relationships that I just want to lay before you today. Okay, number one is this listen for yourself. So no elbows to your husband. No, write that down, my man. Don't do that. And when we talk about sex, when we talk about intimacy, I don't need all the guys shouting me down. Preach it, brother. Preach it, Pastor Dan. She knows. Okay, we'll make it clear. All right. You're going to also have this tendency to think, man, I know who really needs to hear this message. I'm going to send them to live stream today. I'm going to share on Instagram. Tell them that they need to check this message out. Can I encourage you? That's a great time to do that. Any other series, but don't do that this one. Make this about yourself. The biggest room in the house is the room for improvement in ourselves, right? It's an important one. Second ground rule is this. Don't look back because God makes all things new. And honestly, you're going to hear the truth of Scripture in this series. You're going to hear what God's standard is. And listen to me. All of us have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. All of us have already missed the mark. We've missed the standard. And so if you're not careful, you're going to hear some of the truth of the Bible in this series, and you might have messed up in some of these areas, and you're going to go into condemnation. And listen, I want to encourage you not to do that. If you've repented, it's covered under the blood of Jesus Christ, and we serve a God who makes all things new. So that's my favorite thing about our God is that he's in the business of do-owers, and he'll always give you a fresh start. In fact, my favorite line whenever

I officiate a wedding, I have the great honor to do that, is in the marriage vow where you say, from this day forward. Can we all say that together? Ready? One, two, three. From this day forward. So just think about how you can apply this in light of your future from this day forward. All right? Please, please, please do not look in the past. We've all blown it, especially this one right here who's preaching to you, okay? And then finally, number three, this is a PG-13 series, okay? This is a very, very graphic book. Now, we're not gonna be more graphic than what the Bible is, but the Bible's pretty graphic in this book. It's not too graphic for kids that I believe are around the age of 12 or 13 or have gone through puberty. So anything around that age, you want them here. In fact, we have 17 students who are here. They had a sleepover last night with Sherry, and I'm so happy you're in the front row. Guys, I love you guys. I believe in you. You want your students here if they're in the age of 13 parents because we're not gonna let social media or the locker room or their friends talk to them about sexuality. It needs to come from the church and it needs to come from the word of God. But if you have children that are younger than that, I would highly recommend you take advantage of our wonderful children's ministry, okay? All right, everyone ready to get started? If you're ready, say yes.

All right, Book a Song of Solomon, written by King David's son, Solomon. Both David and Solomon, they are prolific songwriters. In fact, first King said this, that Solomon wrote 1,500 songs, and of all the songs that he wrote, this is the best of the best. This is the Song of Psalms. He's basically saying of all the things that I have written, there was none better than this book. It's an amazing book. Chapter one, it talks about attraction. Chapter two, they start dating. Chapter three is the wedding night. It's the honeymoon. And then chapter four, they're already fighting. It is a great book on the study of human relationships. And here's the big idea behind the book, Song of Psalms, is that God's way is not only right, it works. Did you hear what I just said? God's way is not only right, it actually works. See, some of you are here this morning or you're with us online, and you know that God's way is right. You know that you've said yes to Jesus. You know that you're following the Bible. You know that you're going to heaven, but you think a lifestyle of following Jesus is a boring lifestyle. No, no, no, I would actually challenge that

and would say the most fulfilling, rewarding, joyful, peaceful, actually enhancing life, even in your sex life, is found when you do things God's way. When you do things God's way. It doesn't restrict you from anything, but it does have to be done according to the standards of the word of God. Let me hear an amen right there. There's three characters in this book. Again, it is really a confusing book. It's allegory, and there's a whole bunch of poetry and metaphors. And sometimes, even in some of your Bibles, it doesn't tell you when the person speaking changes. And so you gotta know who the characters are. There's three characters. Number one, the lover, that's Solomon himself. And then there's the beloved, that's called the Shulamite maiden. That's the lady in the story. That's the one that he's pursuing in chapter one, dating in chapter two, married in chapter three, honeymoon night, and then fighting in chapter four. It's just a fun book. And then you have this third group that just chimes in from time to time, and that's the chorus of friends. That's the daughters of Jerusalem.

And these are just the onlookers to the relationship. They're the ones that are commenting along. These are the Instagram followers, so to speak. These are the ones, when you post that photo, they're like, oh my gosh, I love that relationship. You look so beautiful. You look so amazing. I'm all about that. And again, it is a really difficult book to understand because it's a lot of allegory, poetry, and there's a lot of crazy metaphors. So let's jump right into this together, all right? Song of Solomon, chapter one, first words of Song of Solomon, and look at where it just starts off. Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth. And all of the men said? Amen. Amen. Thank you, Brother Ron. That was weaker than the 8 a.m. service. They were really excited about that right there. And for your love, this is a big theme for the book, for your love is more delightful than wine. And that was to say, nobody treats people the way that you treat me, like you're different, like you're different. And the way that you love me, she's saying, the way that you love others, the way that you treat people at the office,

the way that you treat people as you're caught in traffic on the highway, you're a master of the human relationship. She goes on to say, they're more delightful. Pleasing is the fragrance. So in other words, when you walk into the room, we know you're there, because all of a sudden, the temperature of the room just got better. Now, don't you know people like that? When they walk into the room, you are so glad that they're there. And then there's some other people, come on, somebody, that when they walk out of the room, you are so glad that they left that room. And honestly, I was studying for this message this week, and honestly, I just even got convicted all over again. I said, Lord, let that be said of me. Yeah, that when Pastor Dan walks in the room, that people are so glad that I'm here, not glad when I leave a room, because I just bring energy, I bring joy, I bring excitement, I bring niceness, I bring the joy of the Lord, which is my strength. And I just wanna challenge you people of Calvary Church, let that be said of us, that we're a people known by valuing and treating others with respect. It goes on, says your name, and your name always means your reputation, your name, your reputation for relationships, the way you carry yourself, the respect that you show women, men,

the way you treat your subordinates, the way you treat your boss, it's like perfume, it's awesome. No wonder all the other women say, I want you, but they can't have you, because you're mine, she says. And then we jump to verse four. So let's get this party started. Take me away with you. Let us hurry and let me get into the chamber, which means his bedroom. So she's ready. She's pursuing the relationship. And so the friends, all the Instagram followers, they speak out. They go, yes, we rejoice and delight in you. We're so excited you guys are dating. We delight in you. And we praise your love more than wine. How right everybody is to adore you guys. And now here comes the context for installment number one, because she makes this comment that I wanna make sure everybody sees. I hope your heart is drawn to the lady in this text, because she says these words in verse four. She says, dark am I, yet lovely. In other words, what she's saying is of herself, she's saying, I'm not much to look at. Because you're gonna see in a minute, based upon her job, she spent a lot of time out in the fields, a lot of time out in the sun,

and now her skin is very red and very cracked. You ever been to the beach with someone and they did not put sunblock on? Come on, that's me. Couple hours in the sun, I will be looking like a lobster that day. You ever worked with somebody that spent their whole life in construction for 20 years, they've been building houses literally with their hands and their hands are cracked and withered. This is basically what she's saying. She's saying, dark am I, yet I'm still lovely. In other words, I know that I might not look good on the outside, but I've got other qualities than just my physical appearance that you need to notice. And I love this. We're gonna start this message today by talking about the order of attraction. Like what should we be attracted to? As followers of Jesus, what should we be attracted to in our potential relationships? What should we be looking for if we are dating someone? What should we be acting like and being like in our marriages? And let me just say this, this message applies to me. I'm preaching to myself just as much today as I'm preaching to you. So thank you for listening in, all right?

We can all get better in our relationships. You following me? All right, so then she goes on. She continues to say, next verse, don't stare at me. In other words, don't look at the wrong thing. And I'm encouraging you in this first installment of this message to make sure you're gonna learn the physical is important. It's important to be attracted to your spouse. It's important that you think they're pretty or that you think that they're handsome, but don't make that all that it is about. The writer's saying, don't build a relationship on bodies. Don't do it that way. And a lot of times, if we're honest, we do. She teaches us the first point of attraction. Point number one, if you're taking notes, and I sure hope you are, write this down, that if we are gonna be followers of Jesus that pursue Jesus in our relationships, the first priority in the order of attraction is this, number one, spiritual attraction. Spiritual attraction. She talks about her values first, not her body. And she says, I'm not gonna be like the other ladies. I actually have a standard. And I wanna teach all of us in this message series how to become more attractive. Singles, how to become more attractive. Spouses, how to become more attractive to your spouse.

To use that attraction to show that God is at work in your life. And you just need to trust your pastor in this message today. If you'll get these in order, God is going to bless you. See, I believe this, blessing always follows order. But you gotta do things God's way. You gotta do it according to the word of God. The first is under spiritual attraction, just a couple thoughts. If you wanna be attractive person spiritually, how do you do that? Number one, you worship God with all of your hearts and all of your soul and all of your mind and of all of your strength. And what I mean is that you're so passionately in love with God that it just exudes from you. That even in a time of worship like this, it's not only attractive to God, but the way that you're worshiping, the way that you're singing, the way that you're lifting your hands shows even your spouse that you love the Lord with all of your heart, soul, mind, and strength. In fact, one of the most beautiful things I think that you can do as a follower of Jesus is just worship God even in a time of worship like this. Now, I'm gonna step on some people's toes a little bit because I walked into worship today and I saw some of you. I saw some of you men standing like that during worship.

Maybe it was the fast song, maybe you tapped your toe a little bit. And I saw you just standing there not interjecting at all. And I would just challenge you with this. The only problem with doing that is that Jesus said these words. He said, give me your all. He said, give me your heart, give me your soul, give me your mind, give me your strength. And there's 150 chapters in the book of Psalms. The biggest book in the Bible is all on expressions of worship. Hands raised, clapping, shouting, dancing, kneeling, stringed instruments, gongs and cymbals playing. That's in the Bible, everybody. Can we do that the moment that we watch an Eagles game and they score a touchdown? Or we do that the moment that we go to a Phillies game and that person hits a home run, our favorite player, we stand up and we start cheering at a concert and when they're singing our song, woo-hoo, we'll give it to everything else but God. And we sing about it this morning, but to the one who saved me, to the one who forgave me, to the one who rescued me, I can't help but praise the Lord. And why don't we just take 10 seconds today? Come on, why don't you? Give your best praise to the King of Kings, to the Lord of Lords. Oh, come on, I know you'll cheer at a Phillies game, but could you give Jesus a high praise this morning?

He's so worthy. He's deserving of our best. And singles, single ladies, listen to me today. When you start dating him, you bring him to church. And if he's got his hands in his pocket through the whole service, find yourself another brother, all right? He ain't the guy. Here's the second thing that you can do to become spiritually attractive. This is for all of us, married, unmarried, single, dating. All of us can grow. All of us can grow spiritually. You can make excuses or you can make progress, but you cannot have both. And again, we've got growth plans at our job. We've got growth plans in our workout plans. Do you have a growth plan for how you're going to grow spiritually this year? I got it for you. It's right on the seat back in your chair. It's called the all-in challenge. I'm not saying this as this cliche phrase to say over and over. I'm saying give me a year of your life and pursue Jesus because you're going to find Him when you seek Him with all of your heart. I'm saying draw near to God and He really will come near to you. I'm saying just taste and see that the Lord really is good. What would it look like, men, if you established for your family, we're going to have a not-miss year. We're going to attend church every single Sunday. We're actually going to honor the Sabbath and keep it holy. What would it look like if you actually said, you know what, ladies, I'm going to read the Bible in a year and I'm going to be a person that hungers after the Word of God. And I'm going to hop on the website and click the next steps tab. And it takes about 20 minutes. But I'm going to read the Bible because I love the Word of God.

And what would it look like, men, if you said, you know what, honey, we're going to the next life track, April 21st. Come on with me. Let's attend one and let's serve one together. Let's find our gifts. Listen, I've created opportunities for you. We just added a fourth service. There is a place for you to serve on the dream team. And you say, you know what, as a couple, we're going to serve together. We're going to attend one. We're going to serve one. We're going to be active in the church. We're going to be planted in the house of the Lord because blessed are those who are planted in the house of the Lord, for they will flourish. And I'm telling you, when you do that, she's going to be like, ooh la la. Because listen, the example that you're setting spiritually, it's more than just physically attractive. It's also spiritually attractive as well. You need to understand that. Finally, how do we become people that are spiritually attractive? Number three, by having some standards. You think, man, if I set the standards here, it's going to turn them off. No, no, no, it's going to turn them on. And I'm encouraging you. I especially want to talk to our teenagers today, our young people today in our 20s, those early 30s. I want to challenge you to have some standards. And when you start that dating relationship very, very early on,

you should sit down together and you'd say, now, listen to me. Before this thing progresses, let me tell you what my standards are. And ladies, if you do that and you say to them, if you want anything more than me beyond those standards, you can put a ring on it, brother, come on. Like godliness is attractive. Godliness is attractive. I'll say it this way. This has nothing to do with relationships, but just to show you a little bit of an example of this. So some of you, what you need to do is if this is sin, way down here, way over here, then you need to draw the boundary way further from what sin is. You need to say this is the marking point. So even if you cross over that path, you are still not sinning. Here, I'll illustrate to you this way. So our founding pastor, Pastor Paul, hired me at 22 years old to be the youth pastor. I say to everybody, that was such a mistake to hire a 22-year-old to be the youth pastor. But I'm so grateful that he did. I wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for him doing that. And so we honor our founding pastor. I'm so grateful for him and his life and his heart and his leadership. He hired me at 22 years old. And I remember, I remember because I really love God and I also love the calling of God is on my life. I remember very early making some decisions. Again, if sin was way over here, moral failure, messing up, I made some really, really clear decisions

that I was drawing that boundary line way further over here. So even if I messed up, I was not in sin. You know what the Bible says? The Bible says that you should shun even from the appearance of evil. That's a word for some people right there. You need to shun even from the appearance of evil. So I had some rules as a 22-year-old, again, as a pastor to 18-year-olds and 17-year-olds, not even much older than them. I would say, you know what? If the sin is way over here, I'm drawing the boundary line so that I'm not even gonna ever text a girl past 9 p.m. That's a student. I'm not texting a youth leader past 9 p.m. at night. That's a female. I will not drive a student home, meet with them alone because God's calling on my life is too big to even compromise one moment of what could be. And I'm telling you, you guys have to draw some lines, some boundaries. If this is what sin is down here in the relationship, I've brought the boundary way over here. So even if we mess up, we're still not in sin, okay? Like godliness is attractive. From this day forward, we're gonna do it God's way. Say amen. Here's the next attraction. The next attraction we see in verse 9 through 14. He says to her, I likened you my darling. And by the way, he says that phrase darling nine times in the book.

That word darling, it basically means you're not only attractive and you're not only beautiful and I not only wanna marry you and be intimate with you, but like you're my best friend. That word darling means like you're a companion to me, like I wanna hang out with you too. I like being with you, you're my darling. And then he says these words, you are my darling, and then he calls her a horse. Now men, please don't ever do that, okay? That worked in 900 BC, that will not work today, okay? He says, you're like a mare, a girl horse, harnessed to one of the chariots of Pharaoh. And what he's saying is these were the most beautiful horses. So Pharaoh had this Arabian pure white horse and they were like prized possessions. It'd be like saying, you're my prized possession. You are so beautiful, you're my best friend. And then she chimes in in verse 13. Here's what she says, well you my lover, you're like a sachet of myrrh resting between my breasts. Now that's probably the most graphic verse we're gonna read in this installment. And I don't even know what a sachet of myrrh is, but I know that he was glad he was one. Come on somebody right there. Now I practiced that line all week. And I am so, so sorry for all of those that are watching online.

Mom, if you are watching online today, I apologize. I am just reading the Bible though. I'm just reading the Bible. And then she says, baby, you're like a cluster of henna blossoms, which is the most beautiful, delicate flower. In other words, you treat me delicately. And that's important because watch this, at the beginning, all of the words were tender that he spoke over her. The sachet of myrrh between her breasts, like she had this remembrance of him. Kind of like a dried flower. If you take a dried flower from an event, you remember that moment, you hold onto it. And so she has this memory of him. That leads us to point number two today. In the order of attraction, not only are we gonna be spiritually attractive, but number two, we've gotta have this emotional attraction. We gotta have emotional attraction. Point number two, emotional attraction. Listen, women have emotional needs, but so do men. And there's this vacuum right now of a lack of emotional needs in relationships, both on the men's part and the women's part. And so we're not feeding each other's emotional needs. And we need to do that because we all have emotional needs. How do we do that? Preaching to myself, just as I'm preaching to you today,

number one, we've gotta value people. We gotta value people. Write this in your notes if you're a note taker. We've gotta find the value in them. And they may not be valuable in every single area. So don't emphasize what they're not, emphasize who they are. My wife and I, when we got married, so, so grateful for my beautiful wife, Carla. Aren't you so grateful for her? She's absolutely amazing. No, I said Kyla, I said Kyla, not Carla, Kyla. And we've been married for almost eight years. And I remember when we first got married, the first time that she ever turned the dishwasher on, she didn't know that you put dish detergent in it and she put Dawn soap and it just exploded all out of the dishwasher. How many know that was a good moment for me to say, baby, you are such an amazing, amazing cook. That was an awesome dinner. I'll take care of the dishes. And listen, there's so many other things that she could say about me, right? But listen, we're gonna find our affirmation somewhere. Let's not major on the minors. Let's not major on what they're not. Let's find value in what we see in them. What we see in them. Number two, number two, we're gonna speak life into them.

We're gonna speak life. We're gonna speak life into them. Have you noticed that people have a way of becoming who you encourage them to be? And the power to life and death is literally found in the tongue. So from this day forward, we have to be a people that say, we're gonna speak life. And then number three, we're gonna think good thoughts. We're gonna think good thoughts. I've actually started doing this over the last couple of weeks on my phone. I have a picture of my wife and family on there. And every time I open up that phone before I even unlock the lock screen, I just take a look at that picture and I just in my heart say, God, I thank you so much for, and I find something to be thankful for my wife or something to be thankful for my son or my daughter about, listen to me, listen to me. If you don't think good thoughts, the devil will sow lies in your head. And you gotta be very, very careful. The enemy prowls around like a lion looking to steal, kill, and destroy. So the order of attraction, number one, spiritual. Number two, emotional. Here's the last part of the story, verse 15 to 17. So now it advances.

They've got the spiritual attraction. They've got this emotional attraction. And then he says, you're beautiful. You're so beautiful, my darling. There it is again, how beautiful. He said, your eyes are like the dove. She responds, baby, you're fine too. You handsome, my darling, my charming man. And then she says, our bed is verdant. Verdant means lush and green. She's basically saying like, I'm ready. Like, let's go. And he responds, he says, I want to too, but he shuts it down. He says, I'm ready for you. He says, but we have a house and that means a foundation. We have this structure of beams. I've already pre-made some decisions. My cedars are like rafters. In other words, I've already constructed something that's important. He's basically saying the physical is important, but it's gotta be built on some standards. And listen, God's word wants us to go there, but it has to be built on some standards. And that's the third distraction. Not only spiritual attraction and not only emotional attraction, but number three, physical attraction. Now we're not gonna talk about that much

in this message today, but you can't get the attractions out of order. The physical is important, but if you do it outside of God's word, his perfect will, listen, it can be one of the most destructive parts of our lives. And I know some of you, you've walked in with guilt. Some of you walked in with shame. Some of you walked in with regret today based on some things that have happened in some past relationships. And I think if we're being honest, it will be because we colored outside of the lines of what God has for us. And so we can't get it out of order. What the Bible says concerning sex and sexuality, that it's one man and one woman in the confines of marriage. And if you're doing it in any other way outside of that, it's not according to the word of God. Matthew 6, 33, seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness and all things will be added to you. You want the blessing of God on your life? You want the blessing of God on your marriage and your relationship? Blessing always follows order. Place Jesus first. So remember at the beginning of the text, she thinks she's ugly, chapter one.

Now we're in chapter two, verse one. And he says these words, she says these words, I'm a rose. I'm gonna tell you, she did not think of herself that way early on. He produced that in her. And listen guys, we can do the same. She says, I'm the rose of Sharon. I'm a lily of the valley. And he goes, no, no, you're better than that. You're a lily amongst the thorns. You're not only beautiful. There ain't nobody like you. You're my darling amongst the maidens. She says back to him in chapter two, verse five, strengthen me now with raisins. Raisins were considered an aphrodisiac. In other words, I need you now. I need you right now. Refresh me with apples for I am faint with love. His left arm is under my head. His right arm is around my waist. They're basically in the make out position. She'll still be talking about multiple times in this book. In other words, he's saying I'm ready, but we're not. And he speaks to the chorus of friends watching chapter two, verse seven, daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you by the gazelles and by the does of the field. Do not arouse or awaken love before it's time. He says, I'm going to keep things in order.

Why? Because God's way is the best way and blessing always follows order. For some of you here today and you're thinking Pastor Dan, Pastor Dan, I don't know that I can do this. Good message, 10 years too late. You're single today and you're saying, there ain't a man out there that's gonna do this for me. And you know what? I would challenge you with this thought today. You're wrong. You know why? Because you're not thinking about it the right way. So when Jesus found you, think about when Jesus found you, you weren't attractive at all. You were actually very messed up. When he found me, when he found Dan McCarthy, I could see Jesus saying, don't want to be married to that dude. Don't want to be in relationship with that guy. That guy has messed up way too much. And he took this incredibly imperfect person and he loved the imperfect. And the love that I received from God, he gave this imperfect person now the power to change. Oh, I know that I'm not where I need to be, but I'm so thankful that God has saved me and he's redeemed me and he's changing me. And now his spirit is inside of me.

The love of Jesus has changed me. And while I'm not all the way yet, the love of God that he's shown me has changed me. And relationships, when done right, do the same thing. Your husband's lady, he's imperfect. Men in the room, she's imperfect. So we show them godly love and the love that they receive in that love, there's a power that's going to change that person, not you and me on our own, but the love of God changes people. I'll close by saying this way. We find love not by finding the perfect person, but by loving the imperfect person perfectly. And that's my prayer for every single one of us. In Jesus' name, everyone sit. So let's pray. Father, we thank you, Lord, in the middle of our pain, in the middle of our brokenness and guilt and shame, God, in the middle of unforgiveness, whatever people have walked in with today, God, we break its power right off of these relationships right now. God, as we step into this study, Lord, would you put things back in order? God, let us begin, Lord, the beautiful attraction of spiritual first. Lord, may we seek you first. God, may we be a people that serve the emotional needs of each other.

And God, that we'll get to that healthy part. physical part later. So Father, in everything that's been in the past, God, we break that power right now in the name of Jesus. And from this day forward, God, I speak life, I speak grace, I speak faithfulness, I speak peace and joy, Lord, over my relationship and over every relationship right now. God, to the singles in this place today, guide them, direct them. Lord, you know what they need. God, I pray that you would be their source first. God, I pray that they wouldn't just be so hungry to look that they don't seek you first. But God, you know exactly what they need. May they trust you in Jesus' name. Every head bowed, every eye closed, just continuing in this moment today. If you're here today, you can't have healthy relationships with others if you don't have a relationship with God first. You honestly, maybe you've shown up today and you said, I don't know how I can even love people. You cannot love people with the love of the Father without first knowing him. And that's why God says, apart from me, you can do nothing. The beauty of the gospel is this, we celebrated this last week in Eastern, is that God sent his son, Jesus, to die on a cross for you and me.

Bible says that all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. But the beauty of the gospel is this, that Romans 10 says, if you declare with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, you believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. Simple moment, just like this, just between you and the Lord. So every head is bowed, every eye is closed. Nobody's looking around, it's just between you and God. I'm gonna count to three. And if that's you today, I wanna invite you to make this decision to be Jesus, Lord of your life. Or maybe you're here today and you realize, you know what, I know the truth of the gospel, but I haven't really been living. I have not been following, I've not been walking with him. Today's a beautiful day to recommit from this day forward to make him Lord of your life. Ready, one, two, three. Come on, is that you? Lift your hand right now. Come on, all across this place. One hand's going up, fantastic. He sees you, he loves you. He's got a great plan for your life. You can throw that hand right back down. Come on, repeat after me.

Say, Jesus, say I come to you today just as I am. Say, God, I know that I've sinned. I've missed the mark, I've fallen short, but I ask you to forgive me. I ask you to change me. I ask you to be the Lord of my life and to make this commitment from this day forward. I'll follow you. Say, my life is not my own. I exist for your glory. Come on, all of God's people said.