Are You Marriage Material ? || Relationship-ology Part. 7 || Dr. Dharius Daniels

and we spend an extended amount of time exploring what the Bible has to say about that and then how it applies to our day to day life. Our mission as a church is really simple. We want to help as many people as possible change their life so they can change their world. Live, love, and so we believe what Jesus offers is more than just changing something in your life. You can do that with discipline. But to change your whole life and the way you need life, the way you live your life, you need more than discipline, you need more than strength, you need a Savior. And so what we are all in on here is how can we take the truth of Scripture and build a bridge to day-to-day life. We're going to be biblically faithful, but in this house we're going to be highly practical because of sermon you hear on Sunday that you can't use on Monday. To me it's not the kind of sermon that Jesus would teach. And so for us, we're in a series of messages. You're in the middle of it. It's called relationship ology. So we're exploring what the Bible has to say about all sorts of relationships. We're in the middle of it now. So we talked about friendships. We talked about dating and situationships. We talked about what we talked about. Work relationships and family relationships. And this week we're diving into marital relationships. And amen. And so we didn't change the series. I'm not pausing the series. I feel like the best way to be honest with you about what change is about is for change to do what we normally do. And so we're going to go together to the book of Ephesians chapter number. I mean Genesis chapter number two, beginning at verse number 21. And we're going to spend our time reading a few verses there. It says, "So the Lord calls the man to fall into a deep sleep. And while he was sleeping he took one of the man's ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he'd taken out of the man. He brought her to the man. The man said, "This is now bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh. She shall be called a woman for she was taken out of man." That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife and they become one flesh. Adam and his wife were both naked and they felt no shame. I'm going to stop the reading of the Scripture there. I want to talk from this subject and I'll time together today. Are you marriage material? Are you marriage material? Somebody in the back like, "Yes, Bishop." I want to start this sermon with a statement that in my estimation is thoroughly biblical. But among a certain segment of Christians it's strangely controversial. The statement is simply this, God did not intend for marriage to make you miserable. For those of you who may be wondering why it is necessary for me to argue such a stance or to communicate such a claim, it's because there's a certain stream of Christian thought that espouses the belief that is captured in the following phrase. Marriage is not designed to make you happy. Marriage is designed to make you holy.

And although I think I understand the intent of that axiom, I don't believe it's entirely accurate. And although it sounds biblical, I'm arguing it's not entirely biblically sound. Marriage is not some magical makeover that makes someone something they're not. Marriage is actually more of a mirror that exposes what you really are. Are you following me? If an individual is selfish, marriage exposes their selfishness. If an individual is prideful, marriage exposes the pride. If an individual is stubborn, marriage exposes their stubbornness. If an individual is lazy and they want to give you lazy love, no effort, no energy, no intentionality, marriage exposes their laziness. Marriage doesn't change things. Marriage shows you what needs to change. A ring don't fix a thing. I am saying that marriage should not be a life sentence to pain. I'm not saying that God doesn't use marriage as an instrument of sanctification. I am saying marriage is not your sanctifier. Jehovah Macadish, the Lord who sanctifies is your sanctifier. And your Lord can use the Scriptures to sanctify you, and the Spirit to sanctify you, and suffering to sanctify you, and the saints to sanctify you, and individuals who do not understand that the primary purpose of marriage is not sanctification or individuals who go into a marriage trying to fix people instead of serving them. Ladies and gentlemen, I'm simply just arguing that God doesn't have to use relational misery to produce spiritual maturity. Just because a marriage is hard doesn't mean it's making someone holy. Sometimes hard marriages produce hard-heartedness in people. And what I found is this Christian, I found that opposed to people raising their experience to the level of their theology, they lower their theology to the level of their experience. And this is, I think, the reason why some people have concocted a theology of misery around marriage because it makes them feel comfortable in marital mediocrity. So because their marriages are miserable, and their friends' marriages are miserable, and their families' marriages are miserable, and their pastor's marriage is miserable, they develop a theology of misery to make them feel good about a bad marriage. And they claim they are suffering in marriage for Christ's sake when the truth of the matter

is they're suffering because of their unaddressed issues. They're suffering because of unhealed trauma, cynicism, selfishness, lack of sexual discipline, arrogance, stubbornness, a refusal to submit to one another, a refusal to forgive, a refusal to change, and a refusal to serve. Jesus is not the reason for that suffering. Jesse is the reason for that suffering. Your Savior didn't do that. Your spouse did. And this theology of misery, particularly in the Christian church, has undercut Christian's ability to demonstrate the evangelistic potential of marriages as they serve as a picture of Christ's relationship with his church. And so as a result of us not being able to be salt and light in this area, it is created and a version to, an apathy toward, and in some cases opposition to marriage by people and culture because of people who have God's presence, God's principles, and God's power are operating in marital misery. Here's what we have to understand, family. What we have to understand is that there are many individuals who see marriage in a way that's been impacted by what they've seen. And if you had seen what they've seen come here or experienced what some of them have experienced, you wouldn't be cuckoo for cocoa puffs over marriage either. Are you here? Who wants to sign up for something for a lifetime that seems like the person lets themselves go once they get you? Who wants to sign up for something that seems like the romance stops when they say I do? Who wants to sign up for something where it seems like I'm signing up for constant and consistent disrespect? Who wants to leave your parents, get a spouse who treats you like a child? Who wants to get into covenant and when you are outside of covenant and it was sinful, it was on the couch and the floor and the bed but now that it is holy and the bed is undefiled, it is non-existent.

[crowd cheering] Instead of raising our standards to the level of our theology, we have lowered our theology to the level of our experience. So we create a theology to anesthetize ourselves from the pain of functioning in something that is inconsistent with God's intention, in part because we're operating with the assumption that being Christians in a marriage is the same thing as a Christian marriage and is not. [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] It's not. And so let's just be honest. We got a brand problem with marriage. And we need to be intellectually honest and say based off of what people have seen and experience, why would they be overly enthusiastic about being a part of that? [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] So instead of judging them for drawing logical conclusions based off of what they see, how about we raise up a people that model and mirror something different, and model and mirror something that is more aligned with God's intent for people in marital covenant that's revealed in his scriptures. Because when I read this book, I see something different. Did you hear what I just said? I know what you're seeing in culture. I see it too. I know what you're seeing in church. I see it too.

But when I read this book, this book gives me a picture of possibility. When I see some stuff in culture, I say I don't want that. When I see some stuff in the church, I may say I don't want that. But when I see some stuff in this book, I say, Lord, I'm running, trying to make 100. 99 and a half just won't do. I want this. [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] I want this. Because when I read this, Ken, I see something completely different than what I see in culture. I see something that blesses me and benefits me and adds to me and protects me and nurtures me. I feel safety. Are you hearing what I-- I see something different in this. [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] And I want to talk to some people-- thank you, Holy Spirit-- that feel broken. I want to talk to some people who feel discouraged. I want to talk to some people who have lost your hope in the possibility of anything healthy and holy in the context of marriage. Because of what you've seen and because of what you have experienced. I want to tell you, don't you put a period where God put a comma, hallelujah. I want to tell you, don't let what happened in your past

stop you from believing what can happen in your future. My God will redeem your life from destruction. [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] There's another way. There's another way. There's another way. Oh, I feel this-- just prompting right here. I'm getting ready to pray, but I need you to be clear on what I'm getting ready to pray. I'm getting ready to pray that your next marriage would be your manasseh. OK, what's a manasseh? There's a story in the Old Testament about this man named Joseph who went through tons of pain with his family of origin. But in Egypt, he gets married. And he gives birth to a son, sons, Ephraim and Manasseh. And he calls Manasseh, Manasseh, because he said, you have made me forget all the pain of my father's house. He said, you have brought me so much joy. You have brought me so much gladness that what I get from you in the present overwhelms and overrides the pain I felt in the past. Manasseh, Manasseh, you made it worth it. Father, I pray for people that have dealt with heartbreak and heartache that this next relationship would be a covenantal relationship that functions like a manasseh. If you receive that for your life, take 15 seconds and thank him for that. [MUSIC PLAYING]

It still can happen. It still can happen. It still can happen. It still can happen after all that heartache. It's still. OK. [APPLAUSE] Let me-- let me-- I see something different here. Can I show you what I see? I said, can I show you what I see? It's in our foundational text. Our foundational text is couch within the context of a book of the Bible called Genesis. Genesis means beginning or origins. So the content contained in Genesis exposes us to beginnings and origins. We see the origin of creation. We see the origin of the human species. We see the origin of sin. But in the context of our conversation today, I want to talk about the origin of marriage. It is right here in Genesis. And the placement of this institution of marriage in Genesis anchors my argument that the primary purpose of marriage is not sanctification. Can God use marriage for sanctification? Yes, but the placement of this institution of marriage-- in scripture, anchors my argument. We're appealing to Genesis because Jesus himself appealed to Genesis when he was questioned in Matthew 19

about marriage. He is faced with a trap question and a trick question from a group of individuals called Pharisees regarding divorce. And instead of debating the nuances of divorce and the concessions that were in the law, he refers back to Genesis, speaking to God's original intent. Now let me prove my point to you. So we start seeing the introduction of this institution at the end of chapter 1 and into chapter 2. I just want to make sure we agree on math real quick, math, not theology arithmetic. All right, here it is. Would you agree that Genesis 1 and Genesis 2 come before Genesis 3? [CHEERING] We in agreement there? OK. So Genesis 1, the end of it, and Genesis 2 introduce us to this institution of marriage. Genesis 3 introduces us to sin. So marriage is introduced before sin. Because Jesus is the remedy to sin, not marriage. [CHEERING] Did you hear what I just said? Yeah. In Genesis chapter number 1 and 2, here's what you see. You see Adam, who is existing with no sin, no trauma, no family dysfunction, no addiction wound, no childhood wound. So you see a man who has not sinned,

has not been traumatized, has not been wounded. And God looks at that man and says it's not good. It's not good for man to be alone. Because marriage wasn't created as a response to sin. It was created as a response to solitude. [CHEERING] This means that the purpose of marriage is not remedial. [CHEERING] Although some things get fixed in the context of marriage, marriage itself isn't the fix. Come on in here. Did you hear what I just said? Yeah, although some things may get fixed in the context of marriage, marriage itself isn't the fix. And I know there are some people-- don't say amen, but there are some people in this room who agree in with the past of the day. You agree in because you've got some experience. You say, Pastor, I know you teaching this exegetically, but I got some experience because it's a bunch of people I tried to fix. And I realized, can't nobody fix them, but Jesus. [CHEERING] I tried my best to fix. I did everything I could but fix. I broke myself trying to fix them. Y'all are talking to me. I violated myself trying to help them. And when we broke up, they were still broken. [CHEERING]

So when God looks at Adam... He's looking at someone that's sub-optimal. He's not optimized. There's potential that's unrealized. So I'm going to send him an asset not to fix what's broke. I'm going to send him an asset to unlock what's in him that can't be unlocked until he comes into covenant with the right person. [CHEERING] And this is so important for the unmarried. This is so important for the unmarried, because if you think marriage is the fixer, you get married looking for someone to fix you. And here's what happens. When you see relationships as remedial, you will choose someone in your brokenness that you don't want or need when you get hold. [CHEERING] Did you hear what I just said? If you see a relationship as a fixer, you see it remedially and not relationally. And when you see it remedially, here's what ends up happening. You will choose someone in your brokenness that you don't want when you get hold. So it means you'll get to a place in the relational journey where you'll be thinking. Now, I realized something. When I liked you, I didn't like me. [CHEERING] And now that I like me, I realize I don't like you.

[CHEERING] He wasn't fixing what was broken. He never calls Adam incomplete. Suboptimal is not incomplete, so he's not sending to complete. You can't hold your wholeness hostage until a relationship. [CHEERING] So God sees his creation operating suboptimally. And he says, you know what? For me to give him what he needs, I'm in the text. Let me put him asleep. [CHEERING] I'm sure there's a reason behind that practically, but I think there's a message in that for us metaphorically. Because sleeping means I'm inactive. And when I'm inactive, I can't interrupt what he's doing. [CHEERING] I'm trying to send you who you need, Adam. But if you're awake, you might get in my way. So go to sleep. [CHEERING] And I just want you lovingly and pastorally, but very candidly, encourage somebody to at least ask God, is this the season? You need to go to sleep. [CHEERING] Maybe you need to get off the app and go to sleep. Maybe you need to stop scrolling and go to sleep. Maybe you don't date these next 60 days. Maybe you-- [CHEERING]

He's just like, when you're inactive, you can't get in my way. When you walk, you keep getting in his way. He's like, now, I pull somebody out your life. Here you go. [CHEERING] I pulled him out your life. You're running and getting him back in. Since you didn't have the spiritual sensitivity or stamina to lead them, I made them ghost you. Now, are you chasing them now? [CHEERING] Go to sleep. [CHEERING] I need to take something out of you real that I can't take out of you until you go to sleep. I need to take something out of you real, but that needs to come out of you, but it can't come out of you unless you go to sleep. [CHEERING] So God becomes the first anesthesiologist and puts him to sleep. [CHEERING] And the text says, he goes into Adam, pulls out a rear, and watch the text, God makes the woman. [CHEERING] All Adam did was This is, you gotta be 40 and over. You can't make a man. You can't make a woman.

Only God, only Macadish can do that. He makes it, 'cause you don't know what you need, Adam. (congregation chattering) So let me make what you need, 'cause you don't know. (congregation cheering) And I think many of us are in a season of our life where we're able to be honest enough with God. Lord, I don't know either. (congregation laughing) Help me, help me. (congregation cheering) So he makes the woman, and then he brings. He brings, for us practically, he orchestrates circumstances where paths cross. It's that easy, it's that easy. It's a public's run easy. Y'all not talking to me. It's a workout easy. It's a meat, it's that easy. It's as he brings, brings her. So God, God brings, he recognizes what God has brought. God sins, but he sees. Sometimes the problem's not with the cinder. Sometimes the problem is with the seer, 'cause the seer don't wanna see who he sent. (congregation cheering) Oh, I don't have time. Oh, I don't have time. (congregation cheering) And first Samuel 15, first Samuel 15.

God tells Samuel, take your horn of all. I need you to go down to Jesse's house. Here's what he says to you, James, he says, how long are you going to mourn over that which I rejected? (congregation cheering) He let Samuel pout. He let Samuel, come on here, lay in the bed. He just, he let Samuel have some bad days. And then he said, okay, Samuel. How long are you gonna keep nurturing an emotional attachment with something I'm through with? (congregation cheering) Take your oil and go to Jesse's house 'cause your oil don't belong there anymore. (congregation cheering) You won't be able to see who he's sent if you're chasing who went. (congregation cheering) (congregation cheering) And when Adam sees her, Adam says this. He's the first words the Bible records a human speaking. The first words the Bible records a human speaking are these words. This is bone in my bone. (congregation laughing) And flesh in my flesh. This is someone from me and they like me. This is an embodied being. This is embodied being. And then he says, that is why a man leaves his father

and mother. (congregation laughing) See next week is husbandology. So we're gonna talk about that. 'Cause he's not saying abandoned family. He's not saying disfamily. He's saying rearrange relational priority. (congregation cheering) See y'all not ready y'all not ready y'all not. He says, so it's not like literally disfamily. It is saying your relational priority now has to be rearranged. (congregation cheering) Now Eve and Adam become the covenantal priority and clean to his wife. And they become one flesh and Adam and his wife were both naked and they felt no shame. Now does anything I just read sound like misery to you? and incarceration to relational misery, and then to pseudo-sanitize it or pseudo-sanctify it by sanitizing it with spiritual language. I see a vision here that is beautiful. I see a worthy cause. I see something in here that I don't see a lot out there. He's painting a picture of what this is like when you do it God's way, not two Christians in a marriage, but a Christian marriage. So really quick, I don't want to just use these very vague terms. I want to be as specific as possible. Can I have five minutes and just share with you what I see in Genesis 1 and 2 are traits that describe a marriage like this. Number one, first thing I see is in Genesis 1, 28, it's a marriage like this is fruitful.

Look at Genesis 1, 28, be fruitful and increase in number. Now if I had time, I would deal with that verse 28 that God blessed them and then said be fruitful and multiply, bless them. So the divine command comes after the divine empowerment. So he only instructs them to do what he's given them capability to. And sometimes the instruction is what reveals capability. You don't know you could love your enemies till he told you. Here it is, here it is. Being fruitful here in part means procreation, having children. That's not all it means. It is not just a command to procreation because everyone won't have children. Everyone isn't called to have children. Everyone isn't physically able to have children. So it is not just procreation, it is procreation but it's not just procreation, it is productivity. He is saying, hey, when this is done my way, something gets birthed that would not have gotten birthed unless y'all got together. Mindfulness speaks to what I am able to produce because I am married to you. Are you hearing that? It means that we're together not just for us, that he uses our union to bless the world, that there is something that now exists in the earth that doesn't exist in the earth unless you and me come together. He bless them. Now this manifests itself two ways in marriages. One, it manifests itself in marriages what people are called to build together, to build together. They work together. They build together. They build together. Now you need to be called to that and you need to be graced for that and everybody isn't called to that or graced for that.

Does that make sense? Yeah. You have to be called for that and when I say grace for that, I mean capable of it, not just in terms of your competence but you got to be capable of it in terms of how God is wired your character because building together requires something called mutual submission. Even if you don't have the character to handle mutual submission, you can't build together. Are we talking about submission too? We're not today but yeah, we're talking about talking about, here's the point, see Ephesians 521, before Paul starts talking about husbands and loving lives and respect and submission, he says in verse 21, submit to one another. He's talking to the Christian community saying even if you sit in a leadership seat, good leaders recognize the expertise of those around them and when they recognize the expertise of those around them, they submit themselves to that expertise. So even though I'm in authority as the spiritual leader of this spiritual family, if somebody from production says, bring the mic closer to your mouth, I'm not going to respond by saying, I'm the bishop, I'm going to say God sent you with that expertise so I'm going to submit, I'm going to get under the mission of being heard, sub-mission. We'll do it together. where you allow ability and where they are asset. But that's not the only way to build together. Sometimes, I build something with you, and sometimes I'm able to build something because I'm with you. We don't build it together, but I couldn't build it without you. The fact that I'm with you, I can build it. You give me so much peace, I can build it. You give me so much safety, I can build it. You give me so much support, I can build it. Everything else is unstable in my life,

but you bring such stability in my life, I can build it. You praying for me, don't you, you praying for me? You support me, you lifting me up. And both of them are equally important, but IG and TikTok have some of us thinking one is more important than the other. Just find your lane, but it should be fruit. Number two, it should not wanna be fruitful, it should be flourishing. God looks at a sinless man and says, "It's not good for men to be alone." Somebody say, "Flourish." He says, "It's not good for men to be alone." So he's not fixing Adam, he's adding to Adam. And the flourish means to thrive and to succeed, to grow. Notice the context of this statement is the context of a garden where things grow and flourish. And I'm speaking of human flourishing here. It means 'cause I intend for the covenant of marriage to be a place where the soil of your soul flourishes like a garden. Question we need to be asking is how's your soul? Who am I becoming? Not that I'm with you. Am I becoming more healthy or less healthy? Am I becoming more aligned or less aligned? Am I more secure? Am I identity or am I less? You're supposed to be an instrument God uses to help reintroduce me to who I am.

You're making me forget. I found you and lost me. My soul should be flourishing. And some of you know what it's like to be in situations where you're not flourishing, you're dying. It's not my father's heart. It's not his heart. What's that number two? What's wrong, no, no, okay. Number three, yes it has. Eight to the man. Here it is, number three, fulfilling. He says this is boning my bone flesh and my flesh. This is interesting now. When God says it's not good for me to be alone, God is there where Adam? God's there, but it says not good. Like how you alone have God there? He says, but you are a being with a body and I'm not. God's like you're being with a body, I'm not. So there are some needs that need to be met through an embodied being. You need some bones and some flesh. So yes, I'm gonna meet your needs, but there are some needs I am going to make provision for by giving you a person that is suitable to meet them. And this person isn't supposed to bring you total fulfillment, but they are supposed to bring you relational fulfillment. I'm standing on it. No, yes, I get my fulfillment from God.

But there are some needs that we have relationally that God himself says, I will only meet those through an embodied being. You need a person. So there's relational fulfillment. When the person I'm in marital covenant with is relationally responsible. It is when they take their marital responsibilities seriously. And what I found is people are saying vows based on romance and not responsibility. Because there are some places, some needs they have, and God's like the only place they can get that need met is you. And the question is, are you gonna be responsible enough to make sure those needs are met? Let me tell you what Christians do. Now, this my fourth time preaching this live, and every time I say at this point, it was solace of the lambs, but I'm gonna say it again anyway. (congregation applauding) Here's what Christians do. Christians unconscious, not all Christians, but I've seen this in Christian relationships, they unconsciously abuse the integrity of the person they win. (congregation applauding) Let's stop playing, stop playing, stop playing. (congregation applauding) That person's got integrity.

You know they got integrity. So you don't take your responsibilities as seriously, 'cause you know their integrity is gonna keep them faithful. (congregation applauding) But when you was with a cheater, you would, (congregation applauding) you doing everything for the cheater. (congregation applauding) Let me make sure she good. Let me make sure he good. But when you got somebody, they love God, and love you. (congregation applauding) He'll be all right. Okay. You know it's God's son, right? (congregation applauding) He'll be all right. You know it's God's daughter. She'll be all right. You know it's God's daughter. You promise them and God. This is the only story you can shop at, and I'm gonna put what you need on the shelf, and you break in your word. (congregation applauding) You told God, besides you, this person will be my highest relational priority.

(congregation applauding) Making sure they, I'm not gonna give them what they can get from you. But my job is to give them what you want them to get from me. That's my responsibility. (congregation applauding) I'll be feeling like all that affection. Be feeling like all that talking. It's responsibility. (congregation applauding) Do you feel like going to the cross? (congregation applauding) I promise God that the things He could not give you directly, I would. (congregation applauding) And so many people feel stuck. 'Cause they're honoring or covenant they made with God, with a person who isn't struggling with infidelity, but they struggle with irresponsibility. (congregation applauding) You just letting them struggle. But you love 'em. Some of us need to repent. You stood before God. You told God. And now all the stuff He's blessed you with has distracted you from the covenant you made. Now you're too busy to keep a covenant. (congregation applauding) You got vacations, but no covenant.

More square footage, but you not keeping covenant. (congregation applauding) (congregation applauding) And number four, free, free. Adam and his wife were naked and not ashamed. This has nothing to do with physical intimacy. Now I'm not saying physical intimacy is not important. The Bible talks about it, but we just live in the heat in this, the culture, and people be, especially when you sing, it's just like, it's gonna be 24, seven, four times a week, seven days, okay. You'd be drinking water, taking naps, that's what you're gonna be doing. (congregation applauding) What'd you do, man? We put on a movie. That's what we got there. What we're doing and I watching a movie tonight is what we're doing. (congregation applauding) (congregation applauding) Oh, my God today. (congregation laughing) Oh God. So I'm not saying it's not important. I'm just saying that's what not, this naked and unshamed is not about that at all. It's about being fully seen, fully known, and completely loved.

[BLANK_AUDIO] be fully seen, fully known, and fully loved. Not fully agree with all the time, but I'm safe here. With all my flaws, I'm safe here. With my brokenness, I'm safe here. With the stuff I'm trying to fix, I'm safe here. With the stuff I'm working through, I'm safe. And when this doesn't exist, Christian couples will end up feeling more safe with a best friend than they spouse. Because best friends are the place where you fully know, fully seen, and completely loved. You know, they gonna correct you, but they're not gonna judge you. They're gonna tell you now, you know you're wrong. But I love you. Free. That one place. Now I don't know any person on the planet. I'm not saying they don't exist. I don't know any person on the planet that's got all four of these things perfectly. But I do know people, including myself, whose testimony is like Paul, I don't count myself to have apprehended. But this one thing I do, forgetting those things that are behind and reaching for what's ahead, I press. I'm pressing toward fruitful. I'm pressing toward flourishing. I'm pressing toward fulfillment. I'm pressing toward free. May the Lord give us a heart to press. Why would I ask you to use my life and not actually to use my marriage? If you can use anything, Lord, you can use me. I don't want just a blessed marriage. I want a useful one. I want people to believe in love again. I want men to know that you really like that. Not when you one man with 30 women, but you with one woman for 30 years. We're getting ready to go. I'm tired. My feet hurt. I promise you, it's about two or three times. If I didn't think it would look ghetto, I would have been took these shoes off. I've been up here barefooted like an evangelist. I've been a barefoot prophetess up here. I promised. To the unmarried listener pastor, you may you no longer bring your theology down to the level of your experience. May your new standard align with your theology. It's got to be fruitful. It's got to be flourishing. It's got to be fulfilling and I got to feel free. And to the married who's tired of fighting and you're tired of pressing, not fighting each other, but tired of fighting and tired of having conversations and tired of going through issues. May your heart be reignited to fight, not just to build

something that makes you happy, but to build a marriage that brings God's God glory. May you recommit yourself. May you recommit yourself to that worthy cause. I'm talking to the brothers next week, but I'm telling you something. Let me get off my feet. Let me tell you. When you are really pursuing Christ's likeness in the context of marriage, God will bring you to degrees of death of ego that it will reorient your idea of cultural masculinity. You will fight with your own It's the only way you can be Christ to the church to say what you've been to me. You calling me to be to her? The patience you've given me. Culture says, you don't have to take that. The patience you've extended to me. Like, oh, that's death. (congregation cheering) But unless a seed falls to the ground and dies, it abides alone. If you were gonna let some things die, there are some things that can live. We gotta go. May the Lord bless and keep you. May he cause his face of favor to shine upon you. May he be gracious to you. May he protect you. May he provide for you. And may he grant you peace. This is my prayer for your life in Jesus' name, amen. Thank you for being with us today. See you next week.