Why You Can’t Break Free From Your Past (It’s Not What You Think)

We're in a series that we title Out of Nowhere, and the title of this message is More Than Your Name. My hope and prayer today is that when you hear this message, no matter where you're from, what you've done, where you've been, that it would help you understand the mercy and grace of our Father in heaven. That too many times we allow people to label us, and today I'm praying that some of those thoughts words been spoken over you be broken today. Father, in the powerful name of Jesus, thank you for being with us, thank you for teaching us. Thank you, Holy Spirit, for moving in the hearts and minds of all those that have ears to hear what the Spirit of the Lord is saying. Father, I pray people will be set free in their thinking, be able to move forward in their lives because of your word, in Jesus' name, amen. Today we're looking at a man who only gets two verses in the whole Bible, not two chapters, not two pages, two verses, and yet God thought his story was important enough to include in the scripture forever. People say, why do you say it like that? It's because it's a sandlot, you know. You gotta quote it properly. That one and then hook, where he says, kill them, kill them all, those are my two favorite ones, you know. That's bad for a preacher, isn't it, like this? But many people do know this prayer that we'll talk about. And very few know his story. If you grew up in church, you probably heard someone

preach on the prayer of Jabez. But before there was a prayer, there was a person. And before there was a blessing, there was pain. 1 Chronicles chapter four, verses nine and 10. There was a man named Jabez who was more honorable than any of his brothers. His mother named him Jabez because his birth had been so painful. He was the one who prayed to the God of Israel. Oh, that you would bless me and expand my territory. Please be with me in all that I do. And keep me from all trouble and pain. And God granted him his request. See, sometimes your story may begin with pain. The first thing we learn about Jabez is not what he did, it is what happened to him. His mother named him Jabez because his birth had been so painful. So the name Jabez literally carries the idea or the meaning of sorrow, pain, grief, and hurt. Imagine carrying that name your entire life. Every introduction, because names meant something in the ancient world. Every introduction, pain, sorrow. Think about it. Grief, every conversation. Every time somebody called your name, you were reminded of pain. See, they often described identity, character, destiny, and reputation.

Today, we don't really know what our names mean. I hear people tell me their names all the time, and if they're unique, I say, do you know what it means? And almost, not every time, but almost every time, they say I have no idea. Well, I looked up my name, my name's Steve. I looked it up, it means crowned one. So I told my wife, you better treat me better, I'm almost like a king. But then, my middle name is Delano, and it means of the nut tree. So then my name became, yeah, you're the crowned one of the nut tree. Dang, try to live with that one. I'm not kidding. I'm trying not to laugh, but anyway. And J-Bez's name was a constant reminder of suffering. Now, I know most of us do not carry names like that, but many of us understand what it feels like to carry a label, not a name on a birth certificate, but maybe something spoken over you, something done to you, something you have done. And you started to believe that is just who you are. The names like failure, rejected, unwanted, divorced, an addict, angry, broken, or how about this one, not good enough. And here's what the enemy knows that you need to know. Labels create limits on your life. That's why some of us, we love God, but we're not really achieving,

we're not doing the things we want to do or the things we think we can do. It's because of these labels that have been embedded in our thinking through whether something was done to you, something spoken over to you, because words spoken over people that you're no good, you're not enough, whatever it might be, when you start believing them, you begin acting like them. And then we start calling ourselves failure, rejected, no good. But labels create limits. You know, years ago, my wife and I, when we moved to Roswell, a gentleman, two gentlemen, Richard Marcus and Brother Hames, who became like family to us, they hired us in Roswell. And then we were talking one day, and he was telling me about one of his sons, that he went to school, and I don't know if they tested him, and they said he's basically intellectually, you know, mentally disabled. And so they said he'd probably never learn past the third or fourth grade level, whatever that was. And I remember Brother Hames, and I looked at him, and I said, what'd you guys do? And he said, we just chose not to believe it. And I said, what'd you do? He said, we just prayed for him every day. His name is Steve also.

Now he's a professor at, I think, Duke University. Or Loyola, one of those. But he's moved around. But he just said, we're not gonna buy that. We're not gonna believe that. Let me tell you something. The world puts labels on us, and the school system will put labels on you. That's why you gotta be careful telling your kids, yeah, you're a little slow, you're a little slow, you're a little slow. How can they ever achieve when you put those limits on them? Yeah, they may have some struggles, some disabilities, but they can overcome them. God can do anything if we're willing to believe him. Well, my son's this, my daughter's this. The school said, the doctor said, so what? Don't let them label you. Don't let them label your kids. You look at your kids and say, with God, all things are possible. To those that believe that God can, we can overcome this. We can do better than they say you could do. But we like labels. But we need to realize that labels put limits on your life. They just do. When I grew up, you know, when I was born, I had a crossed eye. It was cross-eyed, so it just sat over in this, close to my nose.

If I looked at you straight, you would think, you'd be like, who are you looking at? Because, seriously. And then I had double vision on top of that. And when kids used to call me cross-eyed, because back in the day, they didn't have cool glasses like this. They had big black ones with Coke bottle lenses. And then kids would pop off to me and say, hey, cross-eyed, and I'd hit them in the mouth all the time. I got in so many fights, my dad said, you gotta quit hitting kids in the mouth. Some I won and some I lost. But I'd hit them anyway. But what I didn't realize over those years, what it was doing to me is giving me a label of rejected. It hindered my comprehension. I had to go through all kinds of therapy, and then finally a surgery. But for the longest time, I was known as that cross-eyed kid. And then one day, I got better because of the surgeries, and now when I look back, I don't see myself as that kid. Whatever it is, and that seems minimal to some of you, but it was a big deal to me. Whatever it is, don't allow the world, and you don't label yourself, and don't allow anybody else to label you. Well, you weren't wanted, you were an accident, you were a mistake. Do you know those words?

Cut deep, or you can't be forgiven, which is a lie. You're unforgivable, this is not true. But think about it. And if he can convince you, the enemy, that your identity is your pain, he will keep you from walking into God's purpose. Here's another name, abused. A lot of us in this room were abused, a lot of people were abused. Whether it's mentally, sexually, physically, but you were abused, and some of us wear that label to this day, we can't, we will not move forward past that label. I hear people talk about it, they'll tell you the story, and you would think it happened yesterday, and it was 20 or 30 years ago. Because they bought into the label of, you're abused, somehow you're damaged. But at some point, we gotta allow God to heal. heal us, it doesn't mean you forget it, it just means you can move forward in your life and take off the limitations. But if you want to live in your pain, you're not gonna go very far, you're just not. Your pain may explain part of your story, but it does not define your future. See, God sees more than what people call you. Look at what the text says, immediately after telling us his name meant pain, there was a man named Jabez who was more honorable than any of his brothers.

The word honorable in the Hebrew means heavy with glory, significant, a man of substance. His name said pain, God said honorable. His name pointed backward, God was looking forward. His name reminded him of what happened, God saw who he was becoming. And notice something interesting about how the text is written, it never tells us why Jabez was more honorable. We do not get his resume, we do not get his accomplishments, we do not get his ministry or his sacrifices, we simply get this, there was a man named Jabez who was more honorable than any of his brothers. And then we get God answers him. See, the spotlight is not on what Jabez achieved, the spotlight is on what, on God's favor. God has always been in the business of seeing beyond labels. You're told you're no good long enough, you're a mistake long enough, then you start acting like that. Or you're not wanted, so you start crying out in different ways. Maybe you're abandoned and abused, you can't let the label of abandoned be the thing that guides your life forever. We can stop some of these cycles today and say God with your help, I'm gonna move forward, I'm gonna take off the limitations because you're the God of the unlimited. But God has always been in the business

of seeing beyond labels. Abram became Abraham, Sarai became Sarah, Jacob became Israel, Simon became Peter, and Saul became Paul. Throughout scripture, God repeatedly refuses to let a person's past determine their future. See, Saul was a killer of Christians. He would destroy families, he would put them in prison, he would separate them. And when God met him on the road to Damascus, he said, now your name is Paul, not Saul. God was able to forgive his past, God was able to give him a new future, and he wasn't gonna be labeled forever as the killer of Christians, the destroyer of families, attacking the kingdom. God has a way of giving us a different name. See, people see what you have been, God sees what you become or can become. People see your worst moment, God sees his redemptive plan. People see your failures, God sees his forgiveness. That is the story of the entire Bible, right there, wrapped up. That's how God works. See, Jabez took his pain to God. Now we get to the prayer. And this is where people often miss the point entirely. The prayer's not about getting rich, it's not about getting more stuff. At its core, this is a man bringing his life before God.

Listen to what he says, oh, that you would bless me, not because I deserve it, not because I have earned it, because I need you. Expand my territory. In other words, God, do not let my life stay small because of my past. Use me, give me influence for your purposes. Do more through my life than I could ever do on my own. That's the way we gotta talk to the Lord. We don't have to speak in King James to him. We don't have to get all holy and get a different voice. Like, we talk like this, and it's like, oh, God. Please, help me, oh, Lord. You don't have to do that. you just talk. God, I'm hurting. God, I don't want my past to put limitations on me. I want to break those labels. I just want to move forward. I'm not going to always be identified with what happened or what I did. I'm going to start being identified with what you did for me. That's the key. And then he says, please be with me. This may be the most important line in the whole prayer, more important than territory, more important than success, more important than a blessing. Jabez understood that the greatest blessing is not what God gives. The greatest blessing is God's presence. Now I want you to know this. I've been praying this prayer over my family for as long as I can remember. Oh God, that you would bless them a bunch, enlarge their territory, influence and favor, that your hand would be upon them, leading and guiding their lives, and that you would keep them from evil and sin, that it wouldn't harm them or anyone else. That's my prayer daily over my family, over my kids, my grandkids, my wife. I pray it all the time. Why? Because I want God's blessing on their life. And nor was I the perfect dad or my wife the perfect mom, but we still loved our kids. And now they talk about things and I'm like, I'm like my parents were like, I never did that. And they're like, yes you did. Dang. My son says I'm getting nicer as I get older and he describes that as because I'm getting closer to heaven, I just want to go there.

Moses said it this way though, Exodus 33 15, if you don't personally go with us, don't make us leave this place. The greatest blessing is not provision. The greatest blessing is God himself. Keep me from all trouble and pain. He's essentially saying, God, do not let the thing that marked my past become the thing that controls my future. The most practical thing Jabez did was pray. He did not sit around rehearsing his pain like people do today. You know, they say one of the reasons that counseling doesn't always work for people is because they don't want to come get counseled. They just want to come talk over and over and rehearsing and rehearsing and rehearsing. In fact, just some of you know, if you go to counseling, they said the worst thing that a counselor can do is keep counseling you when they've given you work to do and you refuse to do it. Actually, studies have shown it does more harm than good because we just want to be heard. And some of us rehearse our whole story over and over again. But God has a way of changing your story. There's a gentleman named Wally Enclovis that I've gotten to know, and we talk quite a bit. We text. And he was telling me a story one night when I was down there about two or three in the morning, and he was in prison for over 17 years. I don't know if it was 18, but close. And he broke out of jail once and prison once. They called him the OG. He was just a bad, bad guy. You just wouldn't want to mess with him. And then he gets born again. He gets out of prison, comes to church, and the church in Clovis. The pastor there, when he's leaving for the first time, says to him, hey, Wally, you're home. And Wally just looked at him and said he kept walking. Then he stopped and said, I never introduced myself. How does he know my name? And then before I left, he said again, he said, hey, you're home. Wally's been going there ever since. He was in jail for 17 and a half years. Today he has his own business. He's got an electrical business, and he does really well. He's one of the most generous guys in the church, of all of our church. He just, him and his wife are very generous. He meets a woman, and she marries him, and she's been good for him. He said, she takes great care of me. But God changed his life. He could have stayed in that label, I'm a convict, I'm a criminal. But oh no, God had a different name. There was a guy here one time, over here. He was with the Banditos. Go strong dude, and he was at home one night, and he was telling his wife. He's gonna go see his girlfriend So his wife says you go see whoever I'm gonna go to church

So she leaves and comes to church. She said she was sitting right over there and He tells his buddy he goes I think she's having an affair like dude you got all these girlfriend you're even telling your wife I'm gonna go see my girlfriend tonight So he says I know she's having an affair I'm gonna go in there and whatever guy's sitting next to her. I'm just gonna start beating the crud out of him So he walks in he sees her he has a wand, but you know you can't see it It's it and he's concealed it and he comes walking in he's ready just to beat the crud out of some guy Cuz she he just knows she's coming to meet some guy in church Big strong tough guy When he realized his wife is by himself he just has a seat Sit stand listen to the message I'm preaching that day and he said pastor by the end of the service tears are coming down my cheeks And I gave my life to Jesus that day What I'm trying to tell you is no matter what the enemies Labeled you no matter what you keep rehearsing God has a different plan for all of us For all of us if we're willing just to let him use us and and and be a part of his kingdom and do just what? He asks not that we'll be perfect, but man we try to do what's right See he did not sit around rehearsing his pain he did not spend years blaming his name How can I get out for my name pain suffering grief? He brought his life before God and that changed everything see one thing we need to learn is God is faithful the entire story ends with one simple sentence and God Granted him his request do not miss that The hero is not Jabez The hero is God himself the story is not about a greater prayer the story is about a great God and The Bible does not say and Jabez believed hard enough Jabez worked hard enough Jabez earned enough. It says God granted his request Grace is all over this story See God delights in doing for people what they could never do for themselves Grace means God is not limited by where you started

No matter what age you start Grace means your beginning does not have to determine your ending Grace means God can write a different story than the one everyone expected See the gospel is not ultimate more than your story The God I mean the gospel is the ultimate more than your story or name story This is where the story points us to Jesus because every one of us had a name before Christ Not a literal name a spiritual one The Bible says we were sinners We were guilty. We were separated from God dead in our sins enemies of God Those were not just labels. That was our condition But then Jesus stepped into our story and At the cross he took our sin. He took our shame. He took our guilt He took our punishment and through faith in him. We receive a new identity See the gospel And I want you to hear this the gospel is not self-improvement The gospel does not just make bad people better It makes dead people alive The gospel does not just change what you do it changes who you are Child of God forgiven redeemed chosen adopted made new The greatest blessing God ever gave was not a larger territory The greatest blessing God ever gave was Jesus to all of us see Again, Jabez only appears in two verses yet a story reminds us of something powerful Your pain is not your identity Your past is not your destiny. Your failures are not the final word your labels do not have the last say God does and

Maybe you've spent years carrying a name someone gave you something spoken over you something done to you Something you have done and you started to believe that is who you are folks Here's the bottom line for Someone in here, without Jesus, you're going to hell. You can accomplish certain things on this earth because of your intellect that God gave you, your abilities, you work hard, but let me tell you something, you'll never have the peace in your heart and mind. And when death knocks on your door, you will live and you will die in great fear. Because the closer you get to eternity, the more you realize whether you're going to heaven or hell. Well, I'm a good person, I could care less, and so could God. You said, that's not right, yes it is. Let me say this to you too, we're not all God's children either. People use that term, I've been reading some of the comments because we're standing up for some things, and we're all God's children, that's a lie. We're all God's creation, but you, if you're not born again, you are not his son or daughter. And the world won't distinguish between those two because they want everybody to think we're God's children. You're only God's children if you're willing to take his name. You're not his child because you were born on this earth. And you say, what does that mean, God doesn't care if you're good?

Good people don't go to heaven, nice people don't go to heaven, generous people don't go to heaven, only saved people go to heaven. And if you're not born again by the power of the blood of Jesus, and you haven't, if you've never believed in your heart and confessed to the mouth of the Lord Jesus, you're on your way to a place you don't wanna go. You don't wanna die now. And I can't tell you over the years how many people have come to service and gotten born again and died the next day or that day. Thank God they made a decision for Christ. Because eternity's real and it's forever. It never ends. You don't get paroled from hell. There's no board, you're there forever. Just think about forever. Most of us think that if we hadn't eaten in three days, that's forever. If we have a problem and it lasts a week, that's forever. But it's more than that. But you start to believe that is who you are, but the same God who saw more than the name Jabez sees more than your failures. The same God who wrote a greater story for Jabez offers a greater story through Jesus Christ. You are more than your past. You are more than your mistakes.

You are more than your wounds. You are more than your shame. Because through Jesus, you are more than your name. And that is good news. Stop introducing yourself by your wounds. Stop agreeing with labels that God has not given you. Stop answering to a name Jesus already paid to change. So what name are you still answering to? Not literally, but spiritually. How about failure, addict, abused, rejected, unwanted? No good. And here's what I know. If you belong to Jesus, you are not who you were. You are who Christ says you are today. The Christian life is learning to live out of the identity grace has already given you. Second Corinthians 517, this means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone, a new life has begun. And this is what a lot of people don't get because of their past, their sins, their failures, the things they've done that they know are bad. They don't get this, that once you come to Christ, you're a brand new person. This is the Greek word kainos. And it means that something that has never existed before now exists. In other words, God is not saying he made you a newer version of yourself. He is not saying he cleaned you up

and gave you a fresh start. He is literally saying you are a different kind of creature than you were before. You may have been this way, but now you're a whole nother way. It's not just making me better, it's making me brand new. God created something that never existed when you said yes to Jesus. That's why your sins can be forgiven. That's why you can learn to forgive yourself because God's grace is big and sufficient for all of us. And every one of us has had one of those labels at some point in our lives. Maybe the label you have is shame. But that's not the label God gives you, that's the label the world and the enemy gives you. Because shame basically means I'm worthless, I'm of no value, I have no value. And that's a lie from the pit of hell. We've all blown it. How many here have sinned? How many have done things you wish you'd never done? How many wish you'd done things you should've done? But we're all still here, why? Because God comes after us through Jesus Christ and saves our life and gives us a new name, a new way of living, a new person altogether so we can take off the limits of labels. But you have to choose. Take your future to God.

He did not bring you this far to leave you defined by where you started. Let me say that one more time. He did not bring you this far to leave you defined by where you started. He's taking you somewhere in the future. He's trying to get you to take the limits off so he can use you in a way that you never thought possible. Folks, there's no way I would've been picked by anybody to be used like this. No way to be picked that I'd be doing what I'm doing today. And I've made a lot of mistakes. I have sinned big time. I still live, sometimes I think back at my life and I have so many regrets. And I have to take the name off regret and say that's not my name. Because I have a lot of them. And if I allowed myself, I'd just live there and I wouldn't be doing this today. What is it that God wants to do in your future that you're limiting him? We blame him, but it's us. Quit rehearsing your wounds. Quit telling everybody that would be willing to listen your whole story. At some point, you have to move on from that, from where you began and start living where God has you today. Yeah, you may have been abused when you were younger,

but man, you got born again and God takes that label and says, oh no, you'll never forget it, but man, you can walk out of that. And you can start living your life and achieving and doing something that you'd look back and say, I'm proud of myself. And I'm truly thankful to God. He took this life that I didn't think was worth living and he gave me a life. That's why whoever this is for right now and you're thinking about suicide, it's a life from the pit of hell. God's trying to reach you as much as he's trying to reach anybody. Take that label off that you're not worth anything, that no one cares. God just showed you how much he cared. Let me just do this real quick. With every head bowed, please, no one looking around. Just reverent for a minute. Just a minute, just a minute. I know it seems odd to bow your head and not look around, but please. If I just spoke to you right then about what I just said about suicide, I wanna specifically pray for you and I don't wanna embarrass you so I'm gonna ask you to do this real quick. If that's you and you say, pastor, that's me, I'm just gonna ask, I'm gonna look across church real quick.

Just put out your hand and put it down, but I wanna be able to know is who am I praying for? Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. God's gonna break that over your life because you are worth something. There were several that raised their hands. Father, in the powerful name of Jesus, we take authority over the spirit of suicide. That is harassing and causing them to think that they're no good or they can't get out of this or they can't come back from something. And I take authority over that spirit right now and command it to stop in its maneuvers and desist in its operations in their minds and their lives. And Father, I pray that scale falls off their eyes and now they can begin to see the glorious light of the gospel. That, Father, you are coming to them and saying you are worth something, you are valuable, you can overcome, you can get through it. Yeah, but preacher, my heart's broken, I know. But Psalms 34, 18, it says, God is close to the brokenhearted and he rescues those who've been crushed. Life is worth living. And so live it. In Jesus' name. With every head bowed and you say,

preacher, would you include me in your prayer? I've walked with Jesus, but I've walked away. I wanna come home and I keep walking away because of those labels that you talked about. And today I'm gonna. Break them once and for all and I'm not going to allow them to dictate to my life any longer Are you hearing you say preacher? I've never asked Jesus to be Lord of my life. I came I thought I'm cool. I'm okay I belong to this church or that church or that group or this group But unless you ask Jesus to be Lord of your life, you are not going to heaven. You don't even have a relationship with God You're not a child of God But if you want to be if you're ready to ask Jesus to be Lord of your life and change your life And give you meaning and purpose to your life like you've never experienced. This is your moment Because God's grace and mercy is big and it's big it's bigger than anything you could ever do If that's you right where you're seated you say preacher including your prayer I'm gonna ask you to do this one simple thing. I'm gonna ask you right where you're seated If you say God, that's me Pastor Stephen clue me in your prayer. Are you ready in Jesus name? I'm gonna ask you just to lift your hand up right where you're seated who would say preacher include me in your prayer God I want you in my life. God bless you. God bless you. God bless you over there. God bless you I see that hand. God bless you. God bless you. I saw those hands. God bless you It's up to you to humble yourself and say yes, God bless you No One can do it for you God bless you. God loves people I'm gonna look across the top one last time anybody else say okay preacher clue me in your prayer. I Want to be different. I want I want to become something new. I I want God in my life I'm gonna look across the bottom section one more time anybody else Father, thank you. God bless you. God bless you over here. Thank you. God bless you. Yeah Father in Jesus name you saw all the hands Thank you. God bless you and

You know their names You know what the world has labeled them, you know what people have labeled them, you know the way they think But God you're coming into their life to interrupt their life in a great way To give them meaning to their life to help them understand that you're real and that you do care And we thank you for your grace and mercy upon them in Jesus name If you lifted your hand, I want you to pray this prayer aloud with me right where you're seated But if you're right with God, you're already right with God I want you to pray with us I Want you to pray loud enough for your ears to hear your voice And if you're right with God, would you pray in support of those who lifted their hand? So no one's praying alone and listen this maybe you didn't lift your hand, but you know you should have I Want you to pray this prayer out of your own mouth with us Because I want to introduce you to Jesus Church, would you pray this prayer with me? Would you pray God? I choose to believe in your son Jesus and I believe He is real and that you raised him from the dead To give me a new life so today according to your word, I believe that in my heart and Now I willingly confess with my mouth Jesus be Lord of my life Thank you for saving me For forgiving me and for helping me in Jesus name Amen, and amen and amen. Let's thank the Lord if you would