You Don't Have to Control It | 1 Samuel 24

Like the Holy Spirit saying, "Hey, maybe you shouldn't respond that way." And then I try to talk myself out of it of like, "Well, this is an opportunity." Or, "What else does the Bible say about this?" And let me pray about this for a while, or whatever it is, those are all good things. But how many times do I let just the very quick, Holy Spirit is telling me this thing, and then responds to that? - This is the Crossroads Daily. No experts, no perfect people, just honest conversations about what happens when the Bible shows up in real life. - Hi, I'm Deebo. - Hey, I'm Chuck. - I'm Alex. - I'm Josh. - And thanks for joining us. Today, we are talking about 1 Samuel 24, which is in the midst of this story of David, the future king, he's not king yet. He's actually on the run. The current king wants to kill him. It makes for great TV. I mean-- - Can he have a lot? - Yeah. - Right? - Next week.

- Yes. - But particularly today, David has a prime opportunity to kill his enemy. It's great, I love the Bible. The Bible says like, basically, king had to go to the bathroom. Goes into the game that David's hiding in. Doesn't know David's there. It's like the perfect opportunity. I think, you know, Josh, I'll talk to you, but one of the things I've always wondered, one of my like weird closet fears is like someone's gonna attack me at the urinal. - Yes. - When I'm so incapacitated. - I don't know. - I can't really. - I'm not the only one. - That is 100% legit. - Yeah, I mean, your back is turned-- - Guys, that sounds horrible. I'm so sorry about that. - I mean, it's just like a thing. I don't know. It's never happened, but it's just one of those things. So anyway, so Saul is an in situation, perfect opportunity to kill him if he's your enemy. David doesn't do that. And I wonder, we'll get into why David didn't do that, but I wonder when you are afraid,

what are you tempted to do? Are you a run person, you're a fight person, you're an avoid person, you're try to control person? What's your natural instinct when it's like, I wanna, I'm afraid, this isn't good. I wanna, what do you do? - Check all of the above. - No, yeah. - No, that's exactly what it's gonna say. - Like, it depends on the circumstance. - Yeah. - Or say more. Or maybe give an example, like what? - I don't know. Yeah, I do think it depends on the scenario. I think a lot of the times I'll try to avoid maybe I think that I'm gonna have to think of a specific example. - I've got one for you. - Go Josh. - So to that, like, it depends, for me it definitely depends on the circumstance, but the thing that immediately came to mind is, when my ego or my identity are threatened and I'm afraid of my position, I will fight. Like, I will like, alpha mail it wherever I am and like just assert dominance somehow. So when it's, when my identity is offended or my ego is offended, I fight. - Yeah, I think I'm similar. I think when I feel fear of other people, I defend.

So I'm really, I have a tendency to get really defensive if someone, if I think someone thinks something that's wrong about me or whatever, I think I jump into defense mode. But I think when it comes to fear of, like being out of control of certain circumstances, then I just avoid and don't want to do anything. I get into decision fatigue and I just, if there's a lot of decisions and I feel like, "Oh, I don't know what to do." - Sure, yeah. - My mom watches this podcast. She's going to love that I bring this up. My wedding was a nightmare for my mom because I, this is like such a dumb example of fear, but I think I was so scared of making a choice that would affect people in the wrong way. Yes, the process, yeah. - What if I make this choice or what if I make this choice or whatever. - Sure. - And I was just, I was such a nightmare and then I just didn't want to make any choice. And so finally my mom was like, "Just let me do it." And I was like, "Okay, you can do it." And then it was great, but that's like a small example of like some probably larger things in my life where I just like go into, I just don't want to decide. I don't want to do it, so I'm just not going to. And I avoid it. - Yeah, mine is, if I feel inadequate,

if I feel like I don't measure up and it's something I'm afraid of, I will avoid it, I will delay it, I will put it off. it's starting to affect other people, but I just sometimes can't get over my fear of inaction. And so I'll just like, I'm just gonna let it, it's gonna let it happen to me, so yeah. - Yeah, I think for me, I like to control things. Like if things don't go the way that I want them to, and it's, I have a fear that's coming out of that place of like, oh, I don't like, things aren't happening the way I want them to, it's causing this fear inside of me. I want to control things. I feel like the word control has been something that God has been bringing to my mind a lot in the season of my life, like in every area, like my friendships, my marriage, my like control, like I want to control. And I think it's just a deep under, like belief, I think that I have that I have my best interest, like my own best interest, like, so I'm gonna try to control the situation. - Yeah, right, it's best in my hands, right? - Yeah. - No, that's good. That's good. David does none of that. He does none of this, which is so interesting. He does do this thing. He talks about, like, he goes up the song, like, he does a little piece.

- Right, yeah, what is there some weird cultural context to that that we don't know about? - That's a quick question, I don't, I don't know, is it great? - Okay. - I've always, I don't know. - I've said it as, he wanted the king to know he could have and did it. - Yeah. - That's what he did. - That's what he did. - That makes sense. - Yeah. - That's why he did it. But yeah, I don't know if there's anything other than that. - Yeah, 'cause doesn't he, like, hold it up? - He does, he does. - Yeah. - At some point. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Oh, it's gotcha. - Yup, and I could, yeah. - What in David was working that caused him to not take advantage, and let me be honest too. Oh my gosh, we as Christian people, we can spiritualize seizing control in our heart. The Lord must have given me the opportunity to kill my enemy, I'm gonna kill my enemy. - Yeah, yeah. - We would spiritualize that thing in a heartbeat. - Like if he did it, we'd probably be like, okay, this was just a, you know? - That's right, that's right. And this is how the story was supposed to go, you know? But he didn't do that. Why do you think, well, what was working in David?

There's a lesson there for us. - It was his understanding and reverence of the kings of God's anointed. It was about maybe his fear of the Lord, maybe it was fear, I don't know, but at the end of the day-- - And you mean healthy fear of the Lord. - Yeah, like, this is God's anointed. It doesn't matter what happens. I'm going to, so it wasn't about Saul. - Yeah. - That had nothing to do with us. - That's right, it was about his commitment to the Lord. - He says that over and over again. He's like, God's anointed Saul, so I can't. - I can't. - I can't do this. - He never said, he never said God's anointed him. I really, I really want to kill him. 'Cause you know we did. - Yeah, you know we did. - Yeah, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. - And he's saying that so his friends would have been like, we wanted to kill him kings, right? - And he still refers to him and gives him that honor of King, like my Lord, my King. And you're like, you, that's really big of David, at that point. 'Cause I'd be like, you know my King? Like, you're not my, like, I'm not honoring you anymore. You're coming after me and killing me, trying to kill me. So, yeah, and that's my right to not, because you've treated me this way. - Yeah, and I do that every day

with people in authority in my life. Whether it's practically or like in my mind, in my heart, you're not doing it right, so screw you. - Yeah, yeah, that's right. - And what David's doing is going, what I'm learning from David in that is for me, like, it's not about my bad or good boss or my bad and good, whatever. - That's right. - It's about my commitment to the Lord. - That's exactly right. - And my faith in understanding what he wants. - That's exactly right. - Yeah, and I think, I mean, I think about that. It makes me think about my closest relationships. 'Cause, you know, don't tell anybody. But the people I want to control the most are my wife and my dear. - They live under you. - Don't tell Ruth. - Don't tell us. Don't tell us. - They're not listening. - They're not listening right now. - That's right. - This is this idea of, like, you know what? My wife is God's anointed. - That's right. - She's God's child. Like, I don't, I could see some stuff.

We can have a conversation, but like, and she sees a lot of stuff this way too. My kids, same thing. You know, like, God's got my kids. Like, that's a really hard one for me. I'll be honest. - Sure. - It is really hard for me to release control of the outcomes of my kids' lives. Especially as they get older. - Yeah. - Looking at Josh, 'cause then you have older kids. And their consequences have more weight. - Sure. - And it's less of my choice at that point than ever before, but it's like the stakes are so high. And so I think that David is teaching us a lesson that we can apply. You know, hopefully you'll have somebody hunting down to kill you. But no matter what the thing is that we're afraid of, I think there's a lesson here around what does it look like to trust God and to trust God for the other person and for yourself. - Yeah. - Like, okay, God, you've got, and you've got me. And I think David was able to demonstrate that. So that just hits me. That just hits me. That's a powerful lesson in this for all of us.

- Yeah. - Yeah, yeah. Anything else stirring up for you as you think about this? The story? - I think the line that sticks out to me in this, it says, David's conscience, conscience? - Yeah, you got it. - I got it. David's conscience bothered him. Like there was something in him that stopped. So yes, to all the things that have been said, but there was something in him, probably the Lord, it doesn't say that specifically. But I think, I mean, how many times have I had my conscience bothered me? Like some, you know, sort of the Holy Spirit saying, "Hey, maybe you shouldn't respond that way." And then I try to talk myself out of it, of like, "Well, this is an opportunity." Or, "What else does the Bible say about this?" And let me pray about this for a while, or whatever it is, those are all good things. But how many times do I let just the very quick, Holy Spirit is telling me this thing, and then respond to that? - And I think that's what's so powerful about this. It had to be like a split second he decided not to do the thing that he wanted to do. - Yeah, good. - I think that's a great place to land it.

- Yeah. - What's your conscience? What's bothering you in your conscience as you listen to this? Pause and let that be a conversation with God. (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music)