Why God Allows Difficulty | Isaiah 5 | Crossroads Daily

Hey, I'm Chuck. I'm Jamie. I'm Debo. I'm Chris. Thanks for spending some time in the app with us as we look at Isaiah 5. Man, there's a lot of weighty words in Isaiah 5. You know, I'm sure if you woke up today saying, I just want a positive word from the Lord, you might have found something in there, but this is probably not that scripture. But we're going to talk about why that actually is something we need to understand about the heart of God. But first, I'm curious, what's a time or where's a place where you either are or have found your identity apart from Jesus? And, man, I'll go first. I was a serial people pleaser. Like, I used to talk about my value equation was I equal, my value was my actions and what other people think about me. And that was the way that I would negotiate with you in relationships. That was the way that I would determine whether I'm doing well in life or not was what do I feel about my actions? And most importantly, what do other people think about me? And I was totally, you know, both struggling with being authentically who I was meant to be. But also, if that's your value equation, you wind up accumulating a lot of pain and resentment, and you turn a lot of that toward God. And a lot of my deepest, darkest addictions and predilections were based on the anger that never got dealt with because my value equation wasn't working. So that for me is for sure a place. Yeah. One thing that comes to mind is sometimes it feels like I get degrees off of my identity in Jesus. Like, OK, God made me this way. And then I'm like, but you know what I can shine at on my own is how I plan and organize things for people. And then I can get so consumed on, like, providing that service. Like, maybe it ties into what you were saying, Chuck, of that's the value I get back from other people of, like, what I can do for them. And so, like, knowing my role in the family as the planner of vacations and every detail is, like, coordinated. And then people get annoyed with that because then I'm like, we're late or we're doing this kind of thing. But then when I don't plan, then they're like, but it was so much better when you had a plan. And so then I can get caught in this, like, how do I perform in that space? And I lose sight of, like, the gifts that God has, like, blessed me with and who he's called me to be. That's good. That's good. Yeah. I mean, I've shared before I've really struggled with the idea of forgiveness and grace.

And I think for me, knowing who God is, that he is somebody who's forgiving and loving. I've struggled with even doing that for other people. I struggle with forgiving other people, showing grace to other people. And then in turn, I think I also have a hard time forgiving myself. So I live in this space of, like, oh, I need to do all of these things. And if I mess up, then I get mad at myself and God's mad at me and other people are mad at me. And I kind of live in this place of shame. And I feel this weight, like, on me. I think I've grown out of that as I've grown in my relationship with God. But I still feel that even now. Like, I'm working through this, like, okay, just living in shame of doing things wrong or making mistakes. And so, yeah, that's me living outside of my identity, I think. I can totally relate to that. You all can weigh on this. To the degree that you're experiencing more freedom in that area, what was that process like for you? Because I'll tell you what the process was like for me. It was like Isaiah 5. It was like what we read today. I had to learn that in love, God is willing to—there's a line in this scripture today that hits me. He says, I'm going to remove the hedges. What that means is I'm going to allow you to be exposed. I'm going to bring difficulty into your life, trouble into your life, so that your foundation or lack thereof will be exposed. And I think we can buy into the lie, honestly, that, well, God loves me. So because he loves me, he's never going to bring anything hard into my life. No, he actually, because he loves you, will allow difficulty to come your way, especially if it's going to refine you. Especially if it's going to expose the place, Chuck, where your performance is taking the place of my approval. I'm definitely going to let that hardship go in your life so that you can reestab—so that God can reestablish a firmer foundation for me. So I'm wondering, would you guys agree with that? Or has it been easy-peasy, you just woke up one morning, God pointed out to you and said, oh, no, I don't do that anymore. Now I'm fine. I don't struggle with planning my vacations anymore.

I woke up and it was— Yeah, it was wonderful. You guys can check me on this. I like to think of it as God's passive wrath in my life. There was a season—I mean, a lot of my life that was like the scripture that said, woe to those who call evil good and good evil. That was like—my whole story was like that. I did not want God to exist. I was doing all the right things, but I was like, this sucks. Like following God is not fun. It's not life-giving. And my heart was in so many other things. And so there was just like a bitterness and God was like, sure, you go ahead and see if the world is going to satisfy you. And it did not. And to your point, like a lot of shame and a lot of, uh, moments where it was like, it was hurtful, like I was hurting myself in so many ways and God was allowing it to happen, I would say through his grace, because he's like, you're going to see that there's nothing that can compete and that like, you are safe here and I have life for you. And so, um, but so many times he could have just been like, you're not getting this. Like I'm done with you. But just a lot of patience through, um, me clearly finding my identity and literally anywhere else outside of him. I love that. Passive rat. I don't know if that's a real thing or you guys agree with it, but that's what I thought. Yeah.

I think that resonates just from the, like the expression, like the grass is always greener. Like, I think God spends a lot of time being like, Hey, I, I in fact know what's best, but I'm not going to stop you from going and experience what's least or what's worse out there. And then in that space of like, um, I think something God is like refined in me over time is that shame isn't from him, but conviction definitely is. And then he's just expectant and open-handed with like, how are you going to respond to that conviction? Um, and you know, will I turn and like go after the thing that he's saying or like believe in the thing that he's putting before me or just even like making better decisions in line with who he is. Um, I could pretend like I always get it right, but even in the midst of that, there's, I bargain where God doesn't, or I test where God is like, you know, try it out, find it, go buy that thing or go do that thing. And then, you know, reconcile with it. But then that becomes the like refining in me. Um, and not just to be like, Oh, then I tried something really terrible. And I was like, okay, God, you were right. But more of a, like, I sometimes feel like I know best or I know better and God doesn't just strike me down in that space. But I do feel like things like I experienced things where I'm, where I feel like, I don't think I had to experience this, that pain and that hurt. I chose that. So like, even how at the beginning of Isaiah, where it talks about like everything was designed so incredibly well, like stones removed and a wine, whatever that created in this space and still wild grapes grew. And I feel like that's my nature is to be the wild grapes. And God's like, okay, you can let me tend to you or be sour. What's your choice?

So that's so good. You know, I think we get a clue at the beginning of Isaiah five, because it says, this is a love song. Right. Well, I mean, there's probably some love songs that sound like that on the radio today, but like, it's a love song. So whatever comes next, the hardship, the removal of the hedges is for love. So question for you guys, as we kind of wrap up today, what do you know now about the love and care of God that you didn't know before he removed hedges and let you go through something difficult? For me, the difference is, is just that what I know about him is just that I know him. And I think before it was like, I didn't, I did not see and taste and really just feel how good he was and what he had for me and what life with him meant. And therefore I was like, I'm going to do everything else because God clearly isn't that good. But then when I began to know him through, through his word, through prayer, through surrounding myself with other believers, I was like, oh, like, yeah, this, I just didn't, I didn't know him. And of course I wouldn't want to follow someone I didn't know. And yeah, that's so good. My, my learning has been, I could lose it all. I could fail at everything and I can still be loved by God and I can still be loved by people. That's the, sometimes that's the harder one. That's the harder one sometimes, right? Um, but that's, that's the invitation when we allow God to love us through allowing us to go through hardship. And so for today, I hope there's something in Isaiah five that maybe on the other side of talking about this does feel like an encouragement.

Maybe you are in a place where it feels like some hedges have been removed. Just know that that too is from the loving heart of a good father who ultimately wants you to be a vine. that bears much fruit.