When Church Lets You Down | Ezekiel 34 | Crossroads Daily

Hey, I'm Chuck. I'm Jordan. I'm Dani. I'm Mish. And Ezekiel 34 is, it's sobering to me when I read that. It's intense. It's sobering. Yeah. You know, like there are broken shepherds. Yep. I am a broken shepherd, you know, like I'm not perfect in the shepherding of my family and even in ministry, like I've hurt people, like there's a lot of stuff here that just is sobering. And yet the beauty of it is God is saying, you won't find a perfect shepherd except for me. And I will be that shepherd to you. So maybe start in kind of a honest place. Have you ever been hurt at the hands of a broken shepherd? And if so, how did you process that experience with God? Probably a few times. The first one that comes to mind, I'm not going to name any names, but someone who did and said something very dumb. You just shouldn't have said that, but he was a very, just like wise man, had a spiritual depth to them and this knack for just teaching people in a way that would influence their spiritual introspection, their ability to look inwards and see how God is speaking to them. And he did, and he said something very, very dumb. And I remember wrestling with everything I learned from him. Does all that just go away? And I know the answer was like, no, but I was still just carried a little bit of shame of just believing, caring, listening to him. I think the reality here again is there's broken shepherds. Yeah. Thanks for sharing that. That's a very honest and real example. And I think you're right. That whole examining of like, does that mean I have to throw everything that I learned from this person? And I think you're right. The answer is no. The answer is no. God only has broken shepherds to work with. It doesn't mean that we shouldn't long for and desire healing. And certainly when I'm in that situation of being the broken shepherd, I need to repent and make repair and all of that. It's true. But it doesn't negate. Yeah, that's really good. I bet you there's probably somebody listening who has a similar experience. I think you spoke to that person. Yeah. Some of my hardest moments in my life and some of the best, most healing moments in my life have both happened within the context of the church. And I think back to a few really difficult moments where again, not naming names, but just like where church leadership that I looked up to greatly and trusted greatly just made mistakes. And I think like wielded the responsibility and the authority in really damaging and wild, chaotic, out of control ways. And I don't think that they were realizing how many people were caught in the shrapnel of those decisions and those explosive comments and decisions. And so I would say I did not process

a lot of those things well, because it just messes with you when you look at people who are there to be spiritual guides and you're confused by their words and their actions and their beliefs, and they feel like they're not working together. And so, yeah, I think about times where I really did not handle those things well and was very confused. And yeah, times where I didn't feel like I quite had people to ask about how to handle it. Yeah. And God's naming that his people have had that experience, right? They've had shepherds that have done all those things, wielded power unfairly and not been the kind of shepherds that he asked them to be. And God makes this promise. He says, I will myself be your shepherd. I think there's a gospel message in this for all of us, which is like, if we're looking ultimately to any human being to be our salvation, they are going to fail us because they were never meant to, nor are they equipped. They need to be saved. They need a rescuer. They can't be the rescuer for us. Doesn't mean that God doesn't give us friends and community and people to support us, but there's a gospel reality here that I think is so powerful, which is that ultimately, ultimately, God sent Jesus. He came himself to be the shepherd that we truly need. The shepherd that will hold our heart with integrity and never let us down. The shepherd who will be the perfect balance of grace and truth. That is the gospel reality that we're seeing even in this Old Testament, with what is a challenge to his people, but also there's a promise there, right? So, how has Jesus fulfilled that longing for you. How has Jesus been the shepherd who doesn't let you down? The shepherd who isn't broken and therefore out of his wholeness is able to bring you to a place of wholeness. I think for me, one experience that I've had recently is I was on sabbatical and gently, the Lord's good like that, gently, because he knows I'm stubborn and I probably wouldn't respond the same way, I just kind of heard this nudge or felt this nudge and I was journaling or whatever, and God said, you stopped looking for me. And I was like, what do you mean? And he was like, you stopped looking for me outside of the things that you're doing. I'm actually doing a whole bunch of other things that I want you to be a part of, but you are only looking for me in your thing.

Pick your head up, pick your head up and look for me. And I did. And then I ended up with a new job. So careful, careful. But yeah, it's just, but it was gentle and it was that guiding and it was, it wasn't like, pull me out of one thing and put me in another and I'm confused and my head's spinning. It was this gentle guiding that was just beautiful and exactly what I needed. He met me exactly where I was. You've said that in conversations before, Dani, I think it's so important to emphasize that the voice of the Lord and his guidance is gentle. It's firm. It's clear. Like, and he had, he had a challenge for you, right? It wasn't like, Oh, you're fine. You're fine. Just be you. Do you? No, but it's gentle. And, you know, oftentimes, and I may have said this before in other contexts, but like, there's always two voices in my head, at least two, but there's at least two and one is this critical, get your stuff together, Chuck, you are failing. And it may sound weird, but like, I had to learn and recognize that's never the voice of God. That's right. Cause sometimes that can sound like the good religious thing to hear. Right. And it's like, no, God never comes with that accusation. Here's all the ways you're failing. Get yourself together.

He will come to your point and say, Hey, I have something different for you and it is better. And you're going to have to lift your head up to see it. But always in a gentle voice, you said that a couple of times. I just think that's so important to, to kind of emphasize. So we understand what it sounds like to hear the voice of God and what it doesn't sound like to hear the voice of God. Thank you for just naming that. Sure. Yeah. I feel like, as I mentioned, my greatest wounding and healing has been within the church. And so where I can look at times where it's been really rough and difficult, I would say Jesus has spoken to me and really brought healing in my life through giving me experiences with leaders and with other people that are beautiful, amazing reflections of the type of leader and shepherd that Jesus is. Now they're not perfect by any means, but I think in the bitterness and in the confusion of bad experiences with leaders or, you know, people, you can be tempted to just like, ah, it's all bad. That's right. And instead of running and trying to find the healing and like some other thing, it was just like, no, just over time, choosing to have confidence and trust to re-engage, like truly believing like, no, this is like back in community and back in relationship and back in, um, the church is where I found a great healing as well. So it's like kind of both. It is both. And, um, yeah, that's a, that's a cool thing. Yeah. Yeah. I've heard somebody call it the beautifully broken bride of Christ, you know, and

there are aspects that are broken because it's made up of broken people, but there are aspects that are so beautiful. Right. To your point, the deepest healing, the truest healing has also come at the hands of the body of Christ for me. Yeah. Yeah. I love that. I love that. Here's something, here's something to think about. I do think you said something that really resonates with me. When we are hurt in our own brokenness is easy to say I'm done with not just this person, but I'm done with the church. And, you know, if you're listening to this, you probably aren't done with the church, or maybe you are, maybe you're on the outskirts. And this is a way that you're staying spiritually connected, but you're not active in a relationship with a local church. And I just want to encourage you, listen, no one's perfect. You're never going to have a perfect shepherd. There is power in allowing God to heal you deeply of a wound to the point that you could actually forgive the person who hurt you and once again, open yourself up to community. And so maybe that's the step. Maybe you're somewhere in that process. If you are, that's pinging. I just want to tell you, I do believe that is a gentle nudge from a good shepherd who loves you and wants you to be both blessed by the body of Christ, the church, but also wants you to be a blessing with the ways that he's wired. in church.