What it Means to Be a Man & Kids in Competitive Sports with Joby Martin

Hey, crew, it's Adam. I'm a husband, a father, a pastor, a follower of Jesus who just like you is trying to learn what it looks like to fully live and follow Jesus in the middle of real life. It is one thing to be someone on Sundays, but what about Monday through Saturday? And so here, we're gonna talk about faith and making a difference in the messy, ordinary moments where it's often the hardest to live out. Some weeks, I'll share what God is teaching me. Other weeks, I'll sit down with leaders, pastors, athletes, friends, there's no fluff, just encouragement and truth for your life between Sundays. I'm so glad you're here. Well, hey, you guys. Let's go. This is Annie, not Emily, love Emily. Emily, God rest her soul. She's actually still alive. Yeah, she's actually just not with us for today. She's in Boston as we speak, right? Yeah, yeah. How about that? Annie and we've been talking about somehow getting you on the podcast for a while. And you basically said since day one, you will never be on the podcast. And look at this, it's happening right now. Yeah, I was actually very adamant.

I was like, I love my job, love these working conditions, except one thing, we'll not be in front of the mic. And here we are. Do we have two fun facts about yourself, two fun facts about you? Let's hear it. Gosh, okay. First fun fact, I am a mother to, I think my dog is one of the best in the world, so we can have differing opinions on that. I have a dog named Keith. Everyone loves Keith. Everyone that I know loves Keith. I love you're talking about your dog before your child. Oh, and I am. That was my second favorite. And that's my second, not my runner up, just happens to be that way. I'm a first time mom to a beautiful little boy named Cohen. How about that? I'll drop in the fun fact that you're also a Die Hard Bengals fan. Yeah, yeah. There's actually two other people, really only one other person in our church that I'm aware of is a Die Hard Bengals fan. That's how I knew that we came to the right places. You were from Clark, South Dakota, and you were a Bengals fan. Yeah, I was like, this is meant to be.

So I'm excited to have you as a co-partner on the podcast. Emily, we miss you so much. We really do. But I love that we're breaking the ice on this, because this will not be the last time. Nope. High Low Buffalo. Okay, hi from me. I got to watch one of my friend and coworkers puppy, a Golden Retriever. So I had a Golden Retriever in my house this past weekend. And even though I love my dog and he may not be a Golden Retriever, I think there's something so cute about a Golden Retriever puppy. It's a puppy? Yeah, so it's nine weeks old. Oh my gosh. I think they are very cute. I would not want a puppy of any kind spending the night at my house. Yeah, it was a little brutal. 355 came really early in the morning. Oh my gosh. English Setter puppies are the cutest things on the planet. I never want one of them ever to spend the night at my house ever again. So there we go. What was the name? His name is Charlie.

Charlie, that's a good name. Yeah, good little pup. So I got some highs in Buffalos for me. The highs has been the South Dakota weather lately has been awesome. Minus the severe warnings, but nothing happened. I literally didn't know anything was happening until we have one of the siren poles right next to our house. So here comes eight o'clock, sirens are going off. We went from never hearing tornado sirens ever in Sioux Falls and now we're hearing them all the time. So South Dakota weather though. And also there's no more water in my basement. We mentioned last week my basement had three feet of water. And so that's gone. My Buffalo, this is a very specific thing. But I think this applies to anywhere though. My Buffalo is my favorite grocery store. It's called Maynard's in Clear Lake, South Dakota. Shout out, I go there every time on my way to my little cabin. But I think this is why I wanted to mention this because what you might be from Tennessee or you might be from California, listen to this. Find those like tiny little hidden gems. What I love about it is I swear my parents own the place. They clearly don't. But I just love being in that grocery store. That's what we always say though. Like whenever you're traveling, you don't want to go to the mainstream tourist place.

It's a hole in the wall, little like Indian food or whatever. It's awesome. It's so good. Literally at this place, there's no public bathroom, but you can go through their back room, like where the staff is at and use that restroom. So you must really know them well if they're letting you in. I asked one time the first time I was there because I need to use the bathroom. Now I don't even ask. I just go back there. They're probably like, who is this random guy who clearly is not a local because look how he dresses, just break it in. So that's the high low Buffalo for today. I like it. Very cool. Okay, so on today's podcast, we had Joby Martin. Yes. Joby is the pastor of 1122 based in Florida. We talk about he is connecting with men in a way that very- a few people, specifically pastors are right now in the world. So we, we just talk about what does it mean to be a man? And the two, what I love about this is the two, uh, places that we can go in the ditch, uh, around manhood. Um, so I, I think, I think people are really going to like that part of different ways we can get in the ditch. And then we talk about, I think this is really helpful. And specifically, cause I have so many guy friends who are wrestling through this. If you're a dad or if you're a mom, like what to do with competitive sports or maybe it's dance for you. Just like specifically like faith

wise. I see so many people put in their faith and their marriages and everything on the back burner. They're financial. Like, yeah, it is so expensive. Kids sports now. I'm like, I'm like, you're literally like, like financially compromising your family for your daughter's dance competition. Like this is just weird, but I really appreciated Joby's. He challenges pastors first off a little bit in this. Um, but he also talks to, um, to moms and dads. I thought that was really, really good. You're going to love this whole conversation. Specifically if you do it in your life, make sure to pass it on to him as well. Sit back, relax, and enjoy. So Joby, uh, a question I want to hop in right from the get go. Um, you have the distinct ability to connect with men. I just, I'm not fluffing your feathers. I just feel like I'm stating a fact better than maybe anyone right now in our country. Uh, what, what is specifically connecting with men right now? Like, yeah, anything, if you could try to put your finger on it, like why, why is it connecting so much right now? Man, what a question. Uh, I am a man. I think that helps. Um, and I mean like not as defined by the world, but as defined by the word. And I think, I honestly think so before I wrote Stan Furman act like men, you know, if you've ever written a book, by the time it hits the shelves, it was like, it's like two and a half years old when you were thinking, you know, I got an idea. I should probably write a men's book. And so I feel like, especially in the 2020s, right around 2020, it's like the enemy overplayed his hand, you know, cities are burning all authorities under, under question. People don't even know the difference between a boy and a girl. It's crazy. Right. And then out of that, the culture, all there's a, it could, the pendulum could over swing the other way, you know? And it was like the return of the alpha male, which is better than the alternative, but there's this old Scottish proverb for every mile of road, there's two miles of ditch. And I don't want me to fall in either the ditch of abdication or like aggression, you know? Yep. Um, and so what's great is the Bible's got a lot of good news for men. Like, first of all, it was God's idea and an attack on manhood or an attack on gender is an attack on the character and nature of God. So Paul in first Corinthians 16, uh, he just, he just lays it out. He says, all right, boys, we got to act like men. And I see that like the hub in the middle of the wheel with imperatives around it, on how to do that, be watchful. That means wake up. Like we're at war and you have responsibility that we are to be strong. And the strength that we've been given is not for us,

but it's to dress ourselves like Jesus, the servant and serve. And, and if we get taken off that wall of provision and protection, then by definition, it leaves those that are most vulnerable defenseless, um, that we are to stand firm. Those are fighting words. When the Bible says stand firm, it means like take a stand or stand your ground. It's actually a military term. Like if you stand up an operation, that means you get ready for battle. And then the last part of the verse that everybody leaves out is and let everything you do be done in love. So I just preach what the Bible says and I don't know, right place, right time. But, but yeah, I'm, I'm speaking to a lot of men. And I think two men have been neglected in the church for a long time. That's a true story. True story. Those two, can you explain really quick, the two ditches to stay out of, uh, explain those really quick. One is like the abdication of responsibility, that beta male that you just don't ever grow up. It's just, you know, the Peter Pan syndrome of, I mean, for all of human history to less than a hundred years ago, there was only two classifications of male. You were a boy or you're a man. And then we've got this new thing called an adolescent, which is, I just call it a dude. It's like a boy that can shave and that's a dangerous thing. So you just, instead of taking ground, instead of starting a career and starting a family and pushing back the kingdom of darkness and advancing the kingdom of heaven, these boys just abdicate responsibility. Don't do hard things. Sit on the couch, play video games, don't have a job, and then vote for people to allow them to do that. That's what they do. Now, part of it is they were raised in a culture where they were told, the very fact that you are a man, you are the problem. And especially in America, if you're a white Christian man, you are the epicenter of what toxicity is. So the best thing you can do is just take yourself out of the game. So that would be one ditch. Then the other side would be what I grew up with, which that manhood is defined by how big my truck is, how many guns I have, how big my muscles are, how fast my Harley is, what I can take. Like, I can drink more beer than you, consume more women than you, make more money than you. Now, I do drive a four-wheel drive truck and drive a Harley and work out and have tattoos and got more guns than I have fingers, could have one on me right now.

Now, none of those things make me a man. It makes me awesome, but that does not make me a man. What makes me a man is to bend my knee to the God-man Jesus Christ and then walk in accordance to what He has called me to. And so, it's just straight out of the Bible. Man, I think those two ditches are so good to highlight. Because it's like, when you're talking about a man, what are you actually talking about? Because I'm not talking about this, I'm not talking about this, I'm talking about this. If you just use Bible definitions, it's provider, protector, prophet, priest, and servant, king. That's what it means to be a man. Wow. And I get provider and protector from the way, those are what the actual words mean in Ephesians 5, when it says husbands love your wife. It talks about providing for her and protecting her. Those are what the words mean. Now, when you provide for your family, that doesn't just mean a roof over your head and food to eat. Possums do that for their family, so we gotta raise the bar just a little bit there. And then the roles of Jesus were prophet, priest, and king. The prophet tells the truth, and men are responsible for setting whoever is under their stewardship, whether it's your wife, or your family, or your business, or your team, or your classroom, whatever it is, according to God's truth, setting them in the right direction, prophet. The priest's job was to connect people with God. So we've gotta shepherd people's hearts. That's what that means. And then the king, the reason I put servant in front of that is simply just to let men know the kind of king we are to be, that we are to create the kind of systems and structure where human flourishing happens best. That's what it means to be a man. And so, you can be a redneck hunter, four-wheel drive, pickup truck driving kind of guy like

me and be a man. You could also be a skinny jean, scoop neck, scarf wearing hipster, and you're sipping a latte at your coffee shop. And theoretically, you could be a man too, you know? So it's not about those external things. You know, you don't beat your chest just because you're strong. No, no, no, man. You may be creating music and loving your family and pointing them to Jesus and those kind of things. But we've all been called to be men that will be held accountable for what God has trusted us with. Joby, so I'm in the room here on this end with two different women, and several times they've just both started smiling ear to ear. So it's like... Well, see, here's the real key. So with this book, Sam Furman, Act Like Men, you know who I hear most from? Wives. Yeah. And every time, because after every service at 1122, I stay in the lobby. I'm the last one to leave. Whoever wants to talk, pray. Sometimes it's just like sign a book and take a picture and people come from out of town. Sometimes it's people's lives are falling apart. Couples come up to me and the dude will be like, man, you know, he's not using the right theological terminology, but I know what he means. He's like, man, you changed my whole life. You changed my whole life. And I look at the wife and she's just grinning and nodding. And I'm like, listen, man, when you do this right, then she flourishes. Because when men lead and love well, everybody flourishes.

Yeah. So let's talk about this. The number one problem in our, in our, the number one problem is sin and we need a savior. No doubt about it. But sociologically, if men would just do what they're supposed to, we don't have problems. The number one problem for poverty and crime and whatever, man, is because we don't have dads, fathers that are pointing their family to the father. So when men step into their role and act like men, everybody flourishes. So you want to find a real man, find a man with a worn out Bible and a smiling wife. That's perfect. Right. By the way, that's the, we use that quote. So take that starting with the sin part, man, so good. Okay. So Joe. will be something I see so many men doing, and I've been guilty of it myself, honestly, is crushing it at work, and then standing on the sidelines when it comes to their faith. You know, they're hitting every goal, maybe even workout goal, sales goals, but man on the sidelines, like they're just faith wise encouragement challenge that you would have for that specific person, specifically a guy. This is so in the book, we spent a whole chapter on it. Uh, Paul tells the church at Corinth, Watch out or be on watch. Be watchful again. That's a military term. If you were if you were a marine and you were on watch, that means you were on the wall for provision and protection, right? So, first and foremost, you have to know that we have an enemy that wants to steal, kill and destroy. It's the only thing he wants to do. And most men don't wake up every day and realize we're at war, and he's trying to take you out. And so one of the things that Peter talks to the men in his church, he's talking to the elders among you, and he talks about characteristics of

an elder in first Peter five first bunch bunch of verses. And then Peter goes through five different things that we need to do. And I think what Peter is telling the men of his church is this is like the photo negative of how men are often taken out. And one of them that he says is be sober minded, be watchful. And a bunch of dudes just get lazy, man, with the most important things. They get real busy at the things that they get rewarded for here on earth, like a job or like fitness. And they get real lazy with the things that matter most. And a lazy man is a dangerous thing. I mean, think about when David's life was completely undone. The Bible says that in the time of year when kings went to war, David's laying on the couch. And he just abdicated his responsibility as king. And then it's just one step after another, and now he's a murderous adulterer. That's not where he intended to be. He just drifted there, and we can all drift there. And so we got to wake up. We got to be on guard. We got to watch out. And a lot of guys get lazy, man. Like they'll kill it at work, and just here's the other thing that happens. Here's such a trick of the enemy, because the enemy can't create anything, so he can only corrupt, you know. He can only take what God has made, and then just twist it. And so the number of men today, they'll work where work. They'll come home tired. One of the things you got to talk to about husbands and wives, though, is what kind of environment is he coming home to. It matters. But a lot of guys abdicate their responsibility as husband, as dad, as head. And they think, well, I'm just gonna sit on the couch, have a drink, or too many, and just watch my favorite cable news network. It's not actually news anymore. There's no free press. It's just all paid for. So, whichever one says the things you like to hear. And then they have all of these. Think about this. Every dude is sitting there watching whoever their guy is. And they've got expert opinions. Have you noticed that everybody is an expert on race relations, geopolitical conflict around the world? They know exactly what should happen in Russia and Ukraine, with Israel and Gaza and Iran. They know what the oil prices should be, what the tax structure should be. They're convinced about how immigration should be. They have all these things. And here's this problem. They sit on their couch, and you feel righteous, because you think all your ideas are right.

And 20 yards away, your children are being discipled by demons through TikTok. And you're not even paying attention. This is what Jordan Peterson talks about. Like, hey, man, before you change the world, how about clean up your room? So, then men will do the same thing with their faith. They just don't understand that it's the only eternal thing that they have a big impact on. So, they'll abdicate it. Now, again, much like the guy that doesn't want to go home, and a part of the reason he doesn't want to go home is because at least the people at work give him a high five and tell him, good job. And then he just goes home, and everybody tells him he doesn't have what it takes. So, there's a part of that. And that's his responsibility, by the way. Not anybody else's in the home. That's his responsibility to help set up that place where it's an engedi for everybody. But then he'll do the same thing with his faith. And then the problem is, here's the problem, is that the Spirit of God in him stirs him and says, you know what, you need to get involved in the church. And then he goes to one and realizes, oh, well, there's nothing here for me. Because a lot of modern churches are just set up for women. They just are. And listen, this is going to get me in trouble. So, let me say it twice for the guy in the back. Just make sure he hears it clearly. So, I primarily wear button-down flannel shirts. That's kind of my go-to. That's what I wear. That's my shirt, okay? spirit, I look fine. I can't look great, this is all I got, I look fine. My wife wears girl shirts, you know, we'll call them a blouse. My wife wears a blouse, and in a blouse, she looks great, okay? And if I put on one of her shirts, it doesn't look great. Something's wrong. But if she puts on my shirt, it looks great. Every single time. And so for too long, the church has been a blouse. It just has. And dudes walk in and be like, this don't fit me, man. And so I'm not just trying to disciple men at 1122. But the reality is, honestly, from the empty tomb until today, I know Jesus has been the head of the church. But godly women have been the backbone, period. They go on more mission trips, they serve more, they're in more disciple groups, all of these things, okay? And so you can make sure that you are discipling the men at your church, and the whole family will be blessed. For sure. You aim at dad, and I'm just telling you, if he leads and loves well, if he's doing his job, everybody will flourish. You aim at mom, you're just getting mom. So we don't really aim at anybody. We just try to make disciples, including men. And that's part

of the reason we're releasing a children's book. I know you don't look at me and be like, that guy is probably good with kids. But we're trying to create tools whereby moms and dads can disciple their children in the gospel. And I get it, man. Dudes, we need a tool for everything, right? No problem. So we just want to come alongside families and help put gospel-centered tools in their hands to help them take hold of that and give them a tool and let them step into that space that God has made them for. I love that. I'm going to come to the book here in a second. Okay. So before we go any further, we have a few people that we wanted to shout out about the partners. Who are they today? Yes. Our partners are amazing. The first partner is the International Justice Mission. IJM is a global nonprofit working to end slavery and violence around the world. I'm just like that. That's a cause to say the least. They focus on the most vulnerable people, people experiencing poverty. And IJM just goes into some of the deepest, darkest, cruelest places on the planet. I've been able to firsthand witness what they've been doing and what they're just amazing things they're doing in Kenya. I was blown away. They not only try to rescue people out of these places, they try to change the structure so other people don't end up in these same exact positions. If you're interested in becoming a Freedom Partner, a Freedom Partner is someone who gives on a monthly basis to the work at IJM. My wife and I, we've been Freedom Partners now for two years. Go to IJM.org and become a Freedom Partner. Our second partner is Vern Eide Mitsubishi. Vern Eide is an employee-owned faith-based company that strives to deliver dreams and transform lives in all that they do. I tell everybody, literally my family members who don't even live anywhere near Sioux Falls, I'm like, if you're looking for a vehicle, Vern Eide, no matter where you live, if you can't drive to Sioux Falls, they'll ship it to you. Whether you're looking for a car, an Acura, a Ford, a Honda, a Chevy, they're going to have it. And you might be looking for a tractor or a boat this time of the year. I should tell my dad. He's big into tractors. I should tell him to get his next one from Vern Eide. Oh my gosh, they got tractors. They got four-wheelers. They got gators. I mean, what do they not?

Not the actual animal, like a gator. If they start selling alligators, I'd be like, I didn't know we were getting into pets. But no joke, go to VernEide.com. You won't regret it. Amazing partners. Really quick. Do you know Bob Merritt by chance? I know the name. So he's a longtime pastor at Eagle Brook Church in Minneapolis. I know he's a fan of yours. He's one of my closest mentors and friends, but we've been bringing him to embrace and he's got that same gift. He speaks to men so well. The two of you need to go shoot something together. Loves to hunt. Just retired several years back. Since leaving Eagle Brook, the church is just flourishing even more. But Bob has taught me so much about preaching to men specifically, just in a powerful way. One other question about men. A lot of my guy friends are starting to say this. I got my kid in every sport imaginable. And I love sports, man. I love sports. Me too. I know you love sports as well. All my kids are in all these traveling sports. I don't know if my marriage is doing well. I know I should get my kids to church. We get there maybe once a month. Any encouragement for that guy? What would be your advice to that guy? And what's interesting is is some of my close friends are starting to say and my kids actually don't even want to be in in sports But I got to get them in the traveling league and all like your words to that person that dad's yeah There's there's a lot. There's a whole lot first of all it's not all or nothing. Okay, so good My son played competitive everything till he graduated high school Was the cabinet of the team played free safety led the team and tackles and all that they I coached He was on a travel all-star baseball team and he was 12 so all the pastors That rail against little league is because their kid wasn't very good. That's just honest their kid couldn't make the team So now it's a sin to play. So that's just true However We bent our sports schedule around church. Not the other way around now. There was a few times we had to miss but that was the exception not the rule and Especially with online options now

Here's the thing kids way more is caught than taught So dad the kids whole life you have not prioritized Jesus and now you expect him to some your kid to do something different than you did and When it comes to the kid whether they want to play or not. The reality is dude the odds of them going pro is so minuscule the odds of you standing before King Jesus giving an account is 100% and the odds of your kid standing at the Great White Throne Judgment is 100% so he's got to seriously ask the question when you go to the field. Are you cheering for the first name or the last name? Because if you're cheering for the last name, bro It's a really sad thing to put kind of pressure on your kid Because you want them to live out all the hopes and dreams you had for you, but you weren't good enough I mean be honest about So dude play all the sports play different sports Don't believe the lie baseball is the worst one that if you ever get out of the stream, you're done That's only true for the kids that aren't gonna be good enough, you know And again, it's not all or nothing. I think when my son he turns 21 this year His senior year of high school, I think I baptized 16 football players and when he was like 13 we baptized 12 of the 15 all-star guys and almost all of those parents are like Deacons at our church. No, they all came to Christ through that. So Use it as a mission field Fun is not the only goal, you know winning is fun So you should win like wait like when the kids would come to me early on and be like my dad said All that matters is if it's fun. I'm like your dad's a communist we Win we're not here to you should join something else you have a coloring group or something Okay, so we play hard but and sports is a wonderful place to learn how to do hard things Especially if you got spoiled little kids that don't have to do anything and that's most of our kids It just is I don't know unless you're gonna move to a farm or move to the mission field The list of chores just aren't what they use. Yeah, but sports is a great opportunity to learn how to work with people You don't like how to when you get knocked down get back up how to handle adversity

so instead of thinking Well, this is good. The Shema is this the Shema when Jesus is asked What's the greatest of all the all the laws he quotes the Shema? Hero Israel the Lord our God the Lord is one that word mean is a hot it doesn't mean number one It's not just like G like God is number one on your list of priorities The Hebrew thought would be more like he's the page on which you would write the list Yeah, so you're gonna love him with all all of your heart soul mind strength and sports just throw that one in there So, how do you do that? How do you disciple your kid and one of the avenues of sports? How are you seeing that field that court? like a like a mission field to the loss and a place to Grow up young men and young women while you're there be involved cheer them on. I mean for sure However, following Jesus is going to be the most important thing in your life Not your batting average Because if your kid is really that good it It'll show man. It will show now. They got to put in hard work. You got to do all those things, but Really really power to really practical. How did you miss you so few? Like church, how do you get really practical? How do you do that? We joined a team that took our travel schedule like the Martins our Schedule into account and we just negotiated that up front and my boy was good. So we had that kind of negotiating power yeah, and Me and the other coaches at that point They had all become Christians and we built everything around our church schedule again Sometimes occasionally there would be some tournament but at our church, too We also have we have Thursday night church our weekend starts on Thursday Yeah And so if we were gonna have to be out of town on a Sunday then we would all be here on Thursday and if we had to be gone for a long time, no problem, we can also catch up online and that sort of thing. But these kids were doing church together, they were doing youth group together, and

they were doing baseball together and football and all the things. So good. Dude, I mean, you talk to all the good people. Talk to David Pollock right now. Think he's good? Yeah. He's good. Yeah. His kid doesn't play on Sunday. Talk to Kirk Herbstreet. Think he's good? He's got two kids playing Division One football. You know what he did? He made Jesus first in their family. Man. Right. So, and honestly, you probably don't have a Pollock or a Herbstreet in your family. Let's just be honest. Gosh. Okay. Your kid's book. You already said it. You're not the face of what I would say, kid's book. There it is. Like an angry Santa Claus, I think is what I look like. Your hope with the book, Joey. This is it. So I partnered with a girl on our team, Lori Newell. She runs all the kids' ministry here at 1122, and we just wanted to take some of the chapters of previous books that I'd written, like If the Tomb is Empty and Anything is Possible

and Grace Train, and just kind of convert them like good gospel truth to be helpful for kids and parents. So that's what we did with this one. And the reason we did this one first, The Big Brave Choice, it's all about forgiveness. So it's something very practical that every parent wants to teach their children. But the problem with most kids' books is it's all just morality based. Like you should do good because it's good and you want to be good. That is not the gospel. And so this is the first one. So far it's doing really well. It hasn't even come out yet, but there's a lot of people on pre-sales and all that. We want to be, so it's all about forgiveness. You know, a brother and sister getting a spat, and then the granddad walks them through forgiveness through the scriptures. But the why is because, I mean, this is straight, Matthew 17, that we forgive because he's forgiven us. The reason I cancel your debt is because my debt has been canceled. And so that's the whole heartbeat behind the book. It's great. And, you know, I mean, it's a kid's book, so it's illustrated and it's got dogs in it because I like dogs and they look like my dogs and the granddad is my dad, you know? But again, so of course you want to teach your kids right from wrong, but the reason that we do right and don't do wrong is because we serve a righteous God, not just, we're not trying to make good citizens as much as we're trying to grow disciples. And honestly, there's just not a lot of, there's a lot of values, morality-based children's material. Yeah. And we just wanted to be a service to the greater church and offer some gospel-centered materials. The Jesus Storybook Bible is incredible, incredible.

As a supplement to something like that, we want to come alongside with a series of books that take these biblical truths, make it into a, you know, the kind of story that a, that a kid would grab onto and know the characters and all of that. That's great. And be a resource to families. That's it. Seriously, everybody listening, you got young kids, grandkids, go buy a book. My goodness. I like, there's something about a book that just connects with a kid still, like over even a tablet or whatever else. My youngest, Max Lucado wrote a book recently, a devotional. The thing is awesome, by the way. And me and him, we've been going through it 70 days long. My kid just loves, loves the thing. But seriously, it's like, go do yourself a favor, get a copy. We'll have a link in the show notes, the Big Brave Choice. Seriously, you got kids, grandkids, just go buy a copy. And parents, you gotta, you know, I mean, my kids are old now, you know, I got one that's about to be 21 and one that's 16, so, you know, we're not sitting in bed reading books with them anymore. But when they were little, I would put them to bed every night. I'd pray over them, pray scripture over them. And they were always trying to leverage. They knew if they ask a bunch of questions, you know, we'd read the Jesus Storybook Bible, and they're just trying to stay up late. So no problem, man. What they intend for evil, then God uses for good. And so what we're trying to do is have some parents be able to sit down on the bed, read some of the book together, leverage that time to pour gospel truth into your kid. And a part of the reason we started on forgiveness, too, if you don't get forgiveness, you will

not get the gospel. The core of the gospel is that God sent his son Jesus to forgive us of our sins. If you don't get that. Only are you not gonna understand the gospel. Not only will you not receive Christ as your savior, your forgiver, but all of your horizontal relationships will be busted up. Because it'll all be quid pro quo. It'll always be what can you do for me? And you'll commodify other people instead of treat people the way Jesus treated us. That we wronged him, we sinned against him, he canceled the debt. Therefore, if I have forgiveness, I should give it. And this isn't good English, but if you ain't giving it, maybe you ain't got it. Because you can't give away what you don't have. It's good. And so it's also a reminder of just our own salvation throughout the book too. So good. Get a copy of the book. Okay, so I have one question and then I have two last questions from audience. So first question, you mentioned dogs. And I don't know if you have the, do you have the greatest dog on the planet? It's an English setter. Do you have one of those? No, I do not.

I have two worthless dogs, but we love them like they're our children now. We got them for our kids when they were, we have Schnauzers. They're a good, we just put a Schnauzer down about a year ago. One of the worst days of the Weber family's life. It's rough and it's, well, so yeah, we got them. We got one, one's named Dooley. He is the boy named after Vince Dooley, the greatest coach of the Georgia Bulldogs. And the girl's name's Georgia. We didn't let our kids name them because it would have been like, I don't know what it would have been. It would have been something terrible. Some UFC fighter and a twinkle star or something. All joking aside though, best dog I've ever been around. I have an English setter named Senator. He turns three here pretty soon. And my wife has one named Iris. If you ever need best dog on the planet. Okay. Well, my wife wanted dogs that didn't shed. So of all of the hypoallergenic dogs, the Schnauzer with the big beard and the tough, it was the least sissy looking dog. And so if I had to get a little one, I wanted something. Nothing with an oodle in it. I'm not going for that.

You and me both. You and me both. Yeah. Okay, so two last questions I posted on Instagram. I got a whole bunch of responses. So you're well known in South Dakota. I don't know if people are hunting with you or just reading your books. I love South Dakota. The first question I got, so I'm just gonna give you two of them. This is from Andrew. He says, as a 27 year old man pursuing Christ, I've realized I need strong mat carriers in my life. By the way, that message hit a nerve because I feel like I've been seeing that phrase. And I know it's, yes, it's in the Bible, but I also know that you talked about it. So his question, how do I identify the right men to trust? I need men who will sharpen me, challenge me and carry me closer to Jesus instead of telling me what I want to hear. How do I identify the right men to carry my mat? All right, the best place to fish for that is in the local church, be involved in your local church, serve, be in a group, whatever, however your church does it. Somewhere there's some kind of men's group that you can sign up for in your church. And I would highly encourage you

to try to be around some guys older than you. Like don't get in a group with all 20 somethings because the concentration of that much ignorance in one place is terrifying. You know, a bunch of 25 year olds telling each other what life's all about, don't do that. And then you just gotta be that kind of man. So if he's using the term mat carrier, then he's heard me teach on this. Share that teaching with three guys, four guys and say, I want you to be this for me and I promise to be that with you. Now the trust word. First Corinthians 13 says love always trusts. So we gotta, the only way to know if you can trust somebody is trust somebody. That's the only way. There's not like, there's not a try out for trust. There's really not. You know, you need decades of life together to know if somebody's trustworthy or not. You're just gonna have to take the risk and just step out and do some life together. Now there's some things you can do. You know, if they've got a good godly family, if they walk with the Lord, then they're probably gonna be more trustworthy with a guy that's trained to reckon his life all the time. But you just gotta step into it because one of the problems with men is,

especially that 20s generation, is they're trying to get everything perfect before they ever step out. That's right. And you know, man, life is like a sailboat. Like, you just can't sail at the dock. You just got to go. You just gotta step out, do something. Because a prayer that God wants to answer is God, would you surround me with some godly men? And the best way to find them is be one. Just be that kind of man for some other people. And the moment you find some guys, you need to deputize them. Again, what makes it easy is you just grab that sermon clip, show them, say this is what I'm talking about. You know, there was a paralyzed guy in Mark 2. He had four friends. They each picked up a corner of the mat and they carried him to Jesus. So I need you to be one of my mat carriers. I need you to care more about me than what I think about you. And when I find myself on the mat, and one day we're all gonna be on the mat, financially, relationally, somehow, we're gonna be on the mat. I need you to be the kind of friend that carries me to Jesus.

Man, that's good, that's good. Okay, last question. This is from Reed. This is a little bit more of a church question. Can you talk about generosity in your church? He said he makes it nearly a competition, like their church should outlive any other church for a worthy cause. I don't know what that means, but I just read it verbatim. Yeah, I think I know what he's talking about. So we're kind of talking about two different things. So the way we talk about generosity at our church is actually, you can't really be generous to God. I mean, if you're honest, what can you give him? So we talk about bringing our first to best and best to him as a response to the character and nature of God. God is first. He's just preeminent. See Colossians chapter one, that Jesus is before all things. And he loves first, and he went first. That's just who God is. So he doesn't do seconds. And a lot of people bring God their leftovers. That's not what we're supposed to do. We're supposed to seek first the kingdom of righteousness. So in South Dakota, tithe is not a well-known word or anything like that.

What, explain what your first means. So the old covenant, the Hebrew word tithe, everybody always says it just means a 10th, and that's not true. It means in the old covenant, in the Old Testament, everybody that was a follower of Yahweh, that was God's covenant name, you were to bring the first 10th of all that you have, okay? Because what you're declaring is that he is first in my life and Jesus says where your treasure is there, your heart will be also. Then over and above the first 10th, there were offerings and gifts. That's like supporting other ministries, helping your brother out when he needs, you know, fill up a tank of gas or something. But we are to bring, Jesus says the number one competitor for the human heart is money. He says no one can serve two masters. Nobody can serve but God and money. So when we bring our first and our best, what we're saying is, God, you are first in my life and I'm gonna orient my life where the first day of the week I'm gonna worship you, the first few minutes of every day, I'm gonna spend time with you, and the first of what you have trusted me, I'm gonna bring back to you. I'm not giving you anything. Like Adam, if I let you borrow my truck and then you came back to me a week later and said,

boy, look how generous I am, I have a gift for you. Here are the keys to a GMC truck. I'd be like, fool, that's my truck. You are bringing back to me what I let you use. So we're actually bringing to God what is actually his. All right, now, in regards to the competition thing, our church over and above outside of bringing the first and best to the local church, because you bring it to Jesus and Jesus is head of the church. That's why you bring it to the church. You're not just supporting an organization, but Jesus is the head of the church, so that's the only way to clearly bring it to him. And then the church makes disciples, and disciples feed poor people and visit prisoners and do all those things. Okay, and in the feeding of the poor, we have partnered with Compassion International as a church. And our church folks, our church members, not just members, but all the people that attend church, we sponsor Compassion Kids. That's not money that comes to 1122, that's directly to Compassion International. Right now, we sponsor about 30,000 children. Holy cow. To release them from poverty in Jesus' name. So that's $17.2 million every year that goes from the people in our church. Now, so what I'll say is, so we sponsor more kids

than any other church in the world. And I'll often say, it's not a competition, but we're winning. And the reason I do that is I've, all the famous Christian people right now, they're all my buddies. And so I'm like, please try to beat us, please, because that would mean they would have to sponsor more than 30,000 kids. I would be happy to be in 10th place. No problem. I wish 100 churches sponsored over 30,000 kids. And let us try to catch up to them. Why? Because that would just mean more image bearers of God would be rescued from poverty in Jesus' name. And so I'm always putting that competition out there, and currently nobody's close. J.D. Greer at the Summit did a good job. At one point, they held the single highest sponsorship weekend, and then we beat them the next weekend, but whatever. That's it. Because, you know, the Bible says we're supposed to outdo one another with honor. It's good. And so I would love for us to try to, churches, to get into a competition to see who could sponsor the most children. I think that is, and a part of it, honestly, Adam,

remember that book, Strength Finders? Yes. So I did that thing. My number one strength was competition. C.S. Lewis says that's the chief of all sin because it's rooted in pride. That's what he said. And I'm like, sweet, I'm winning at sinning. That's my gift. So. What I've tried to do is shift that competitive nature to things that bring God glory. That's what I've tried to do. Joby, thanks for not sugarcoating things. Honestly, thanks for not sugarcoating things. Thanks for being the real deal. I just know there's so many men that are following you. And just thanks for impacting a bunch of, even the people at Muncher. So I'm so grateful. Go and get a copy, The Big Brave Choice by Joby. Joby, thanks so much. Well, thank you guys. Thanks for listening in. Oh, yes. I know I shared this. If you have a dude in your life, specifically a dad, I think this applies to all guys, but specifically a dad, I wanna challenge you to share this episode right now.

In your group chat, if you're in a men's group, share this episode. I think it's so helpful. I think guys will just connect with it big time. So I wanna encourage you to do that. Thanks to our partners, IJM. Go to IJM.org and become a freedom partner. And also Vern Eide. Go get yourself a new vehicle at verneide.com. I think that's all that we know. I think it is. Annie, you crushed it. Thanks. You're welcome back anytime. Well, next time Emily decides to take a trip, here I am. I couldn't even remember her name anymore. I'm just joking. Emily, I'm just joking. No, please, Emily. Emily's become, what's so funny is I have people like who will stop me and ask me about Emily. Yeah. And they're like, she's great, so awesome. No, we're really switching it up on these people. She'll be back. Don't worry. She will be back. She will be back. Have an awesome rest of your day, friends. Bye.

Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.