What About Me?

So we're in the middle of a series called What About? And Pastor Nate has talked about what about doubt? What about truth? What about suffering? And I thought I'm gonna make a play on this series and the title of the message that the Lord has laid on my heart is What About Me? Now, I'm gonna talk about a couple stories, some of my own personal stories, and then gonna go through a lot of scripture today. But if you're anything like me, sometimes life can become about me. Maybe dealing with some comparison and a little bit of insecurity, and maybe you understand that as well. But through the years, I've learned a couple things. One, life is a lot better when it's not about me and it's about Jesus. And the second thing is I can trust that God has a long-term plan and he sees me. Let's pray. Lord, I just thank you for every person here today. God, I pray, Lord, that your words would be spoken. Lord, that I would decrease and you would increase. I pray that you would speak to every single heart the things that you wanna say. In Jesus' name, amen. So early on in ministry, Pastor Nate was doing quite a few weddings. And he had this great idea.

Jodi, why don't you come with me and do a pre-marriage counseling appointment? So I'm like, okay. And if you've heard our story, like I joke about it, Nate and I, I had all these unrealistic expectations when I rolled into marriage and I came crashing down. So I said, yeah, you know, after being married 10 years, these were seven of the best years of my life. And so you think about, you think about life, you know, like I wish it was funny, but it's kinda serious. When you think about life as a railroad tracks, on one side, you've got blessing, and on the other side, you have struggle. And that's what happened in the Garden of Eden, started there. So we had this opportunity. I kinda reluctantly went and, you know, I thought, you got the blessing, the struggle, I'm gonna let this young, blissful bride know about the struggle. Because, you know, I'm feeling a little bit negative at the time, feeling a little bit, you know, whatever. So we go into this appointment. Nate is telling them this couple, all these things. He goes, Jodi, what would you like to say? And I'm like. Well, you know, when I got married, I just, you know, thought it was gonna be all these things, and I proceeded to tell her,

like, all the hard things in marriage. Like, you know, you got all these expectations that are not met, and then, you know, just going on and on. And she looks at me, and she stops me. She's like, what are you doing? I can't believe you're saying this to me. What on earth, what's in it for you? And I said, well, you know, I'm married, and Nate lets me stay home with the kids, and I'm like, I don't know, I guess I didn't get married for what's in it for me. And she's like, she stopped, and she looked at me, she goes, well, I deserve to be happy. And that's kind of where the conversation ended. Her statement has stayed with me a lot, because the world teaches us that it's about us. The world teaches us to live that way. What about my happiness? What about my needs? What about my career? What about my calling? What about what I want? A foundation of a marriage built on focus on self is a shaky foundation. So what about me? Does God really care about my personal happiness? Does he have a plan? What happens if his plan doesn't work out the way I think it should?

Do I jump in and help him? Did he forget me? So if we're not careful, we can strive, control, manipulate, and try to make everything and everyone about us for what we think we deserve or what we need. And a lot of times, we can see narcissistic behaviors in other people, but we seldom see it in ourselves. So today, I'm gonna talk about Jacob and his wives, Rachel and Leah, but first, I wanna talk about Jacob's mom, Rebecca. Now, Rebecca was married to Isaac, and they're some of the foundations of our faith, Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. So she's married to Isaac, and she wants to have kids. So they go to the Lord, and they pray about it. She gets pregnant with twins. So the babies are jostling in her stomach and her womb, and she just begins to pray about it. You know when you have questions, you should pray about it? That's a really good idea. So she prays, and she asks the Lord, what is going on? Why are these babies moving so much? And this is what the Lord said. You can turn with me in your Bibles to Genesis 25-23. You can see it on the Minnesota MN, or I say Minnesota, the Emmanuel MN app. You can just watch on the screen. But I'm gonna go through a lot of scriptures today, and so just follow along. We'll jump around a little bit.

So this is what the Lord said, told her. The sons in your womb will become two nations. From the very beginning, the two nations will be rivals. One nation will be stronger than the other, and your older son will serve your younger son. Now, if the Lord spoke to me about that, I would say, wait a minute. I didn't sign up for that. Now, I have four sons, and they actually get along pretty good. And except, except, when it was time to play board games. Now, I have friends that are like, don't you have family game night? No, because it was not fun when one was winning and the other wasn't, and then it was terrible. Between board games and basketball, it's not fun. So I cannot imagine if the Lord said, you know what, your sons, they're gonna have rivalry into the next generations, and the younger, the older will serve the younger. So the twins were born. Isa was born first, and then Jacob was second. So he was the youngest twin. Now, my twin sister is here at Spring Lake Park today. So if you see somebody that looks like me, I have an identical twin sister. So she said, Jodi, don't point me out. I'm like, I don't have to, you look just like me. So if you see someone that looks, you know, wearing a different outfit

that is not me, it's my sister. So, Jamie, I love you. All right, so she is the older twin. I am the younger twin by two minutes. And as we were growing up, she would remind me, hey, Jodi, you're supposed to respect your elders, so you need to listen to me. So I do, like, listen to you, respect you, Jamie. All right, so the twins are born, and the Bible says in Genesis 25, 28, Isaac loved Esau because he enjoyed eating the wild game that Esau brought home, but Rebekah loved Jacob. Uh-oh, the parents have favorites. Aren't you glad that God doesn't have a favorite? He loves us all. So Rebekah, she loved the youngest one, Jacob. My mom's here, too, I should ask her, Mom, am I your favorite? So Rebekah loved the youngest one, Jacob, and Isaac loved the older one, Esau. Now, eventually, Jacob buys Esau's birthright for a bowl of soup, and pretty soon, Rebekah, the mom, overhears her husband talking to the older son and just saying, hey, will you go and hunt some wild game for me, and then I'm gonna eat it, and then I'm gonna pray over you, and I'm gonna give you the blessing. And she hears that, and she's like, no. I want the favorite to have the blessing. So she works with Jacob, and she devises a plan,

and she has him pretend like he's Esau. He dresses up like Esau. She makes wild food, or like, you know, regular food tastes like wild food. Gives it in there, goes in there. Jacob goes in there and deceives his father, and his father thinks that he's Esau. He blesses him, and then Esau comes in, and he realizes, what's going on here? He kinda overhears what's going on, and he realizes that his dad just blessed the wrong son. And in Genesis 27, 33, starting in our 27, verse 33, Isaac began to tremble uncontrollably and said, then who just served me the wild game? I have already eaten it and blessed him just before you came, and yes, that blessing must stand. When Esau heard his father's words, he let out a loud and bitter cry. Oh, my father, what about me? Bless me too, he begged. But Isaac said, your brother was here, and he tricked me. He has taken your blessing. Esau exclaimed, no wonder his name is Jacob, but for now he has cheated me twice. First, he took my rights as a firstborn, and now he has stolen my blessing. Oh, haven't you saved even one blessing for me? Can you imagine the pain that Esau was feeling? He's like, I listened to your instructions. I did what you said, and I missed out on the opportunity.

Esau was so upset that he was plotting to murder his brother. Now, my sister and I, we've fought a few times, but we've never, never thought that. So Esau, he was so upset that he wanted to kill his brother, and so Rebecca finds out, and she's like, no, we can't, we gotta get Jacob out of here, we gotta give him time to cool off. So she talks to her husband and says, let's send him away to another land where he can find a wife, and that will give time. So, you know, the real story here isn't just about Jacob and Esau. It's about Rebekah. Why would a mom do that? Why would she bless the younger? Why would she trick her husband and help? Maybe it's she had a word in her heart that she wanted to help make it happen. So Genesis 28, starting in verse one. So Isaac, he calls for Jacob, blessed him, and said, you must not marry any one of these Canaanite women. Instead, go at once to Padam Aram, to the house of your grandfather, Bethuel, and marry one of your uncle Laban's daughters. Marry one. That's really good pre-marriage counseling. Now Jacob is entering a new season in his life without his parents.

It's time for him to go and start his own family. So later, we will discover that he's gone for 20 years, and the Bible never records that he saw his mother again. Sometimes we wanna step in and try to help God out, and we can blow up our family doing it. So on the way, God speaks to Jacob in a dream, and he confirms that he's gonna be part of the covenant blessing, the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. So he has this word, and God begins to speak to him after he's out of the care of his parents. So Shirley Denius, who was the founding pastor's wife here, she used to say this to me. Jody, until your kids can get just out of your reach, then God will get them. And I love in Genesis where Jacob has encounters with God seven times. So Jacob, he ends up going to the place that his father sent him, and let's talk about his marriages here. So Jacob arrives at Paddam Aram and meets Rachel first. He was so excited when he saw Rachel because she was so beautiful. He's like, oh, this is who God has for me. He starts crying, he hugs her and kisses her, and says, bring me to your father. So he goes home with her, meets Laban, her father, and he just starts working hard, doing all these things for him. So look in your Bible in Genesis 29.

We're gonna read about 16 verses here. So Laban said to him, you shouldn't work for me without pay just because we are relatives. Tell me how much your wages should be. Now Laban had two daughters. The older daughter was named Leah, and the younger daughter was Rachel. There was no sparkle in Leah's eyes, but Rachel had a beautiful figure and a lovely face. Two daughters, sibling rivalry. I'll tell you, if you are a daughter, you do not want to be compared to your sister, right? It's not fun. I remember when we were kids, my mom would say, you know, quit comparing. One of you is gonna get married first, one of you is gonna have cuter kids, one of you is gonna have a better job, stop now. That was really good advice. That was really good advice. That was really good advice. That was really good advice. That was really good advice. Genesis going into verse 18. So since Jacob was in love with Rachel, he told her father, I'll work for you for seven years if you'll give me Rachel, your younger daughter, as my wife. Agreed, Laban replied. I'd rather give her to you than anyone else. That was kind.

Stay and work with me. So Jacob worked seven years to pay for Rachel, but his love for her was so strong that it seemed to him but just a few days. Finally, the time came for him to marry her. I have fulfilled my agreement, Jacob said to Laban. Now give me my wife so I can sleep with her. PG 13. So Laban invited everyone in the neighborhood and prepared a wedding feast. But that night when it was dark, Laban took Leah to Jacob and he slept with her. Laban had given Leah a servant, Zilpah, to be her maid. But when Jacob woke up in the morning, it was Leah. What have you done to me, Jacob raged at Laban. I worked seven years for Rachel. Why have you tricked me? Sound familiar? So he contrived with his mom to trick his dad to get Esau's blessing and now Leah contrived with her dad to rob him of the blessed Rachel. He says, it's not our custom here to marry off a younger daughter ahead of the firstborn, which he would know about birthrights. Laban replied, but wait until the bridal week is over and then we'll give you Rachel too. provided you promise to work another seven years for me. So Jacob agreed to work seven more years. A week after Jacob married Leah, Laban gave him Rachel, too. Laban gave Rachel a servant, Bilhah, to be her maid.

So Jacob slept with Rachel, too. That's a problem. And he loved her more than Leah. He then stayed and worked for Laban the additional seven years. Now everyone in this family is jockeying for what they want. Jacob, he wants the cute wife. Laban wants a great laborer. The girls, they just want to be married and want love. So Jacob was tricked just like he had tricked his dad. So Jacob, he took matters into his own hands. He wasn't going to settle for what had just happened. He paid for Rachel and he deserved her. He married both. Now at the beginning I talked about this life is better when I don't make it about me. Life would have been better for him as well. Proverbs 16, nine says, we can make our plans but the Lord determines our steps. What if he just accepted Leah as his wife, his only wife? So let's look at the next verse in Genesis 29, 31. It says, when the Lord saw that Leah was unloved, he enabled her to have children but Rachel could not conceive. Leah, unwanted, overlooked, compared, used, God saw her and he acted. So Leah ends up giving birth to four sons. The first three, every time a baby is born, she's like, maybe my husband will love me now. Perhaps he'll respect me.

By the fourth one, who she named Judah, she's like, I can praise the Lord. So there was a shifting a little bit in her heart. Genesis 30, starting in verse one, when Rachel saw that she wasn't having any children for Jacob, she became jealous of her sister. She pleaded with Jacob, give me children or I'll die. Then Jacob became furious with Rachel. Am I God? He asked, he's the one who has kept you from having children. Then Rachel told him, take my maid Bilhah and sleep with her. She will bear children for me and through her I can have a family too. So now he married Bilhah and had two more children. So now he has three wives. Can you imagine? So Leah responds the same way. She's like, I'm gonna give you my maid servant. We can build a family through her. So he marries her and has two more kids. Now there's four. Then Leah ends up having two more sons and a daughter. Rachel prays and God remembers. You know, when there's things going on in your life, you should take it to Jesus and pray. Genesis 30, 22. Then God remembered Rachel's plight and answered her prayer by enabling her to have children.

So Rachel has a son. She names him Joseph. And she says, may the Lord add yet another son. So are you doing the math? Now Jacob has four wives, 11 sons, and one daughter. Now the Bible does not endorse polygamy. It's just recording what's going on. Remember what Isaac said? Go and marry one of Laban's daughters. So Jacob, he had needs too. So the girls were fighting and they had needs, but Jacob had needs too. So eventually he goes to his father-in-law, who's also his boss, and he talks to him and he says, I wanna build wealth for myself. And he has this conversation in Genesis 30, verse 30, the second half. But now, what about me? When can I start providing for my own family? So he ends up working for his father-in-law for another six years and God speaks to Jacob again. Isn't it awesome when the Lord speaks to our kids, our grown adult kids, if you have them? So God speaks to him and tells him, it's time to go back to your homeland with your relatives. So eventually, God's promised to Rachel she has another son. She names him Benoni, the son of my sorrows, and she dies in childbirth. She's buried on the side of the road on the way.

So God is the one who redeems our story. You know when you fast forward and you watch a movie and at the end you've got all the things, and this person did this, and now this person did this? I've got a little list here. So when Jacob left his home, again, his father told him to marry one wife. Leah, the oldest, Overlooked woman became part of the lineage of Jesus through her son Judah. So the overlooked one was in the lineage of Jesus. Rachel's son Joseph, he would eventually help mend the family and he would be a great leader and lead the people in a time of famine. God changed Jacob's name from Jacob to Israel. And he said, you have struggled with God and man and you've won. So the 12 sons became the 12 tribes of Israel. God had a plan for everybody. He can redeem all of our stories. So at the time, at the end of Jacob's life, he requested to be buried with Leah. The one who he did not want at first was the one he chose in the end. Leah was the one who is the covenant, that the covenant was fulfilled with. Wow. So what do we do with all of this? Well, all of us can find ourselves somewhere in the story. Maybe you feel like you're Jacob

and you deserve something. Maybe you're like the girls and you're fighting and finding yourself competing and comparing or being overlooked. Maybe you're the mom who wants to reach in and try to help the Holy Spirit. Each one of us can have something to relate to. So here's three takeaways from today. Three takeaways to remember. Number one, stop striving and trust God. No human can fulfill any need that any of us has. So we can think they will, but they don't. So stop trusting, stop striving and trust God. So not a spouse, not a parent, not a child, no one but the Lord. Yeah, yesterday Nate and I went on a bike ride and it ended up being like 16 miles. We biked to the church and back. And on the, when we were leaving, Nate's like, it's really windy, Jodi, do you want me just to bike home and then I'll come get you? And that was like a challenge. I'm like, no, I'll come with you. So we bike and as we're biking, it was like, this is what striving is, when we were biking uphill and into the wind. God does not want us to strive, we can trust him. Proverbs three, five and six, trust in the Lord with all your heart.

Do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do and he will show you which path to take. Number two, remember it's not about you. When we look at the dashboard of our heart, there's some things that give it away when we're making life too much about us and not about Jesus. Perhaps for me, these are the things that give it away. If I sense that I'm getting a little bit comparison, if I'm being competitive, if I'm feeling envious, if I'm feeling jealous, those are like lights on the dashboard of my heart saying, Jodi, stop, you're making life too much about you. Maybe it's insecurity or anger or feelings of entitlement, feelings of pride being overlooked. These are like all the works of the flesh. That's when we know we're making life too much about us and not enough about Jesus. Life is better when I don't make life about me. So everyone has needs. We have to remember that. We're not the only one in our story that has needs. Jesus is the center of our story, that's all we need. So the answer, like what about me, is not about like self-sacrifice, self-denial, self-deprecation. It's about trusting God instead of focusing on ourselves. So Philippians 2, verse three. Don't be selfish.

Don't try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. The third takeaway is take it to Jesus. So throughout this story, when they sought the Lord, he answered, he showed up, he intervened. And when we're tempted to try to take things in or be disillusioned, we need to take it to Jesus and process our pain with him. When we have questions or things that we need, he's the only one that can help us. He can fulfill all of our hearts. Now Jesus modeled this in the garden when he said in Luke 22, 42. Father, if you are willing, please take the cup of suffering away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine. That's a good word for all of us. Not my will, but thine. So as I close, I wanna share a story. When I was a young kid, maybe five years old, my sister, my twin sister, she said something so profound. Like, she just came up with something and so it was like the whole family was like, wow, I cannot believe how smart this kid is. Like, did you hear what she said? So every time relatives would come over, it'd be like, come on Jamie, quick, come here, come here. Tell them what you just said. Can you believe what Jamie just said? And I just sat there and I'm like, what about me?

Like, will I ever come up with something profound? And I just kind of tucked it in my heart. Will I ever say anything that will get recognized? And then fast forward into my life, you know, I marry Nate and Nate's pretty awesome. But we're in all these revival meetings and they kept like pointing out Nate and they're like, you, Nate, come here. And they would pray over him and have prophetic words. And back then I was like pushing a double stroller in the lobby and I'm like, what about me? Like, God, do you see me? Do you have any words for me? And pretty soon I'm like, okay, someone was watching the kids, so I'm in the altar area service and they're like praying for people and they literally reach around me to pray for the person behind me. And I'm like, okay, Lord. And I felt like the Lord was like, you know what? I want you to experience what other people experience. Most of the world feels overlooked and unseen. And shortly later, you know, like maybe a decade later, I was at a conference and there was just such a strong presence of the Lord in worship and I just felt the Holy Spirit. And all of a sudden I had a vision in the middle of this worship time. And the Lord showed me a picture of my life.

And it was like, kind of like a slideshow. And so it would be like from when I was a little kid, I saw a picture of when I was a little kid and then another picture, another picture like growing up. And then there would be times in this vision there would be like a slow moving movie, you know, and then it would go back to like flashing pictures. And at the very end, I saw the Lord. He turned to me and looked at me. He said, Jodi, I've seen you the whole time. And God sees you and he's seen you the whole time. So does God care about our happiness? Yes, but true happiness only comes from him. Jesus cares about our soul for eternity, not worldly pleasures that we think will fulfill us. So some of you today have never surrendered your hearts to the Lord, or maybe you walked away. And today, I just want to encourage you to surrender to Jesus. Life is so much better when it's about him. The location pastors will give you an opportunity to do that. And I want to pray for everybody in this room and then we're going to take a time to reflect. But there are some here that you've been feeling unseen, you've been feeling unloved, you're feeling forgotten, but I'm here to tell you that God sees you. You don't have to spend your life striving for worth, love, attention, or validation. I want to pray for you. Some of you today, you realize that you have made life

too much about you. And maybe you've jumped in at a few points and kind of blew up some relationships, and I want to pray for you. Others of you today come with disappointments and disillusionments, and you need to take it and process it with Jesus and say, Lord, are you here? He is. So after I pray, the worship team's going to sing a song, Take It to Jesus. And my hope and my prayer for you is for you to take a time and say, Lord, is there ways that I need to trust you more? Is there ways that I need to let go? And maybe he'll give you a picture of your life that he sees you. Let's pray. Lord, I just thank you for each and every person in this room. Lord, I thank you for those who have yet to come to find you. Lord, I pray that they would know you by the end of this service. And Lord, some who are feeling unloved or unseen, I pray, God, that you would look their direction today. Lord, that they would sense you and know that they don't have to strive, Lord, but that you've got them. And for others here today, Lord, that they realize, oh, I've made life too much about me. I pray, Lord, that there would be times of sweet communion

with you where they could laugh and reflect and go, you know what, I don't need to do this anymore. I pray that they would surrender. Lord, and some who are just worrying and needing just answers, Lord, I pray, God, that you would speak to each and every heart, Lord. Lord, we wanna see you. Let's take it to Jesus, in Jesus' name, amen.