Stop Blaming. Starting Owning It. | I Declare

Anybody ever play the blame game? You know that game where you blame others for the things you had a part in? You ever do that? One of the classic examples of that, we were hanging out at my sister's house one time with their kids. They have two awesome kids, my nephew and niece, Everly and Whitaker. They were little. Whitaker's about three years older than his younger sister, Everly, and they each had candy canes and they were teasing each other. It was Christmas time and they were starting to hit each other with the candy canes and Everly hit Whit pretty good with her candy cane right over his head and it caused the candy cane to break. At which time she yelled to her mom, mom, Whit broke my candy cane. Now that's a true statement, right? He did, but what she neglected to mention was her hitting him over the head with the particular candy cane. Now it's easy to smile at kids being kids, right? Because as adults we would never blame other people for actions that we actually had a part in. I'll give you some examples in my life where I've done that. I said this one time, hey I was late for work because my alarm didn't go off. What I neglected to mention was I didn't set the alarm, okay? So that's kind of how that was going, right? How about this one? The teacher's poor teaching was a result of my child's bad grade. That's never true by the way, okay? It didn't mention that he didn't study or she didn't study at all. How about this? I'm so busy I just didn't get my taxes done on time, Mr IRS person. I apologize, but I had two hours each night to scroll on my phone and look at like stupid things, right? Sometimes we blame other people or other circumstances for things that are our responsibilities. So we're in this series called I Declare and we're going to make a declaration today about responsibilities. Let's say the declaration today and then hopefully at the end of the day as we conclude our teaching we can really mean it. Here we go. One, two, three. This year with God's help and the power of the Holy Spirit, I declare I will take responsibility for my life, for my life. I'm not going to blame someone else or something else for things that I have done. The buck stops with me. I'm going to take the responsibility. You know the blame game is something that we all struggle with and actually we don't even get hardly a couple pages into the Bible and we see the same struggle in Adam and Eve. If you have your Bibles, would you turn to Genesis chapter one? We're going to look at Genesis chapter one, an amazing scripture. Genesis chapter one verses 27 and 28. We see God creating people and then pretty close thereafter the blame starts to happen, okay? So here we go. Verse 27 it says, so God created human beings in his own image. In the image of God he created them male and female he created them. Verse 28, then God blessed them and said,

be fruitful and multiply. Fill the earth and govern it. Reign over the fish in the sea, the birds in the sky, and all the animals that scurry along the ground. So from the very beginning they had responsibilities. We're talking about responsibilities. As I read the scripture it was just two things. Multiply. Have babies. That sounds like fun, right? That's great. Govern the earth. Just take care of it. God and man together in paradise with only one rule. I didn't get to the rule but do you know what the rule was? What was the rule that was given in the Garden of Eden that you're not supposed to do? Just say it out loud. Don't eat from the tree. That's good. Everybody was like, I was like, hopefully you know that, right? Don't eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Now a lot of people are like, well that seems like an easy thing. Let me give you like the theological basis of that. What God was saying was simply this. Trust me and my plans for you in paradise that I've created or trust yourself and your plans for you by going to this tree of good and evil. We deal with that a lot in our world today, right? It's the same thing. God's like, trust me and my plans for you with what I have what's at best at your heart or reject God's plans and do it the way we want to do it. Sometimes we reject God's plans. I think one reason is we want to be in control. I don't want him to tell me what to do. Well, there's a decision to be made. When it comes to marriage relationship, am I going to do it God's way in the way that he's outlined in the scripture? Or am I going to do it my way because I want to be in control? When it comes to my sexuality, am I going to live within God's pattern for that, boundaries for that, but also joy in that? Or am I going to do it my way, which is whatever I want to do, irregardless of what anybody else has to say. I think I know what's best. When it comes to our finances, are we going to do it God's way, what He has in store for us, or are we going to do it my way, I just want, want, want? When it comes to any relationship with any person, am I going to do it God's way, loving, forgiving, bearing with one another, or am I going to do it my way, it's got to be my way all the time. Parenting, am I going to do it God's way, or am I going to do it my way? In all of these areas, the knowledge of good and evil is pretty tempting, isn't it? Another way of saying it is, we can look to God, or we can look to Satan. That's really the two options that we have. Speaking of Satan, let's go to Genesis chapter 3.

Are you ready? Let's flip over just a couple of pages to Genesis chapter 3, verse 1. It says, the serpent was the shrewdest of all the wild animals the Lord God had made. One day he asked the woman, did God really say you must not eat the fruit from any of the trees in the garden? Like, is that really true? How can that be possible? Verse 2, of course, we may eat fruit from the trees in the garden, the woman replied. It's only the fruit from the tree in the middle of garden, in the middle of garden that we are not allowed to eat. God said, you must not eat it or even touch it. If you do, you will, what's the Bible saying? You will die. Actually, we're pretty good here, Eve was trying to say to Satan. It's like an all-inclusive resort, right? We got all the food we can eat. We got all the animals we can just hang out with and we actually get to walk around naked and it's no big deal. Now, I jokingly say that, but I want you to put a pin in it because we're going to talk about their nakedness in just a moment. Verse 4, the serpent replied to the woman, you won't die. That's not going to happen. God knows, verse 5, that your eyes will be opened as soon as you eat it and you will be like God, knowing both good and evil. The woman was convinced. She saw that the tree was beautiful, it looked really good, and its fruit looked delicious and she wanted the wisdom, quote unquote, the wisdom that it would give her. So she took some of the fruit and ate it. Then she gave some to her husband. These are very important words.

Ready? Can you say the next four words? Who was with her and he ate it too. Now let's just dispel one of the great myths of the scripture. All the guys sometimes will point and they'll say, it's all the woman's fault, right? If she wouldn't have eaten of the tree, we would have been just fine. But let's not forget verse 6, he was there. He was with her. And one of the things that we see in scripture is that men are called to lead. And Adam was not a leader. He was passive. Men don't be passive. Lead, lead your family well. You could have held Eve accountable. She could have held you accountable. You said, no, this isn't what God told us to do. Let's not give in to that temptation. But what did they do? They gave in and they sent. And what did they do? Does anybody remember what they did after they sent? They hid, they hid. Just like a little child when they're potty training and they have an accident and they're hiding over in the corner, pooping their pants, right? It's just kind of one of those things. They hid. That's what they did. They tried to hide from God. When we do something wrong, isn't it amazing that we do the same thing? Instead of just taking responsibility, we feel this thing called shame and we try to

hide. Verse 7, Genesis 3, verse 7, it says, at that moment, their eyes were opened and they suddenly, what's the next two words? Felt shame. Yeah. At their what? Nakedness. Before it was okay, but now all of a sudden it's not. They sewed fig leaves together to, say the last two words, to cover themselves. Why did they need to cover themselves? Well, because they felt shame. They were exposed. They tried to hide from God. Is that a good idea? No, no. You try to cover it up like you can't see it. Bad idea. Verse 8, when the cool evening breezes were blowing, the man and the wife heard the Lord God walking about in the garden, so they hid from the Lord God among the trees. Verse 9, then the Lord called to the man, where are you? This is God's like having fun, right? Like I know where you are. It's like the kid in the potty training. You know where they are, right? Verse 10, he replied, I heard you walking in the garden, so, say the next two words, so I hid. I was afraid because I was naked. All of a sudden I realized that was a problem. Verse 11, who told you that you were naked? The Lord God asked, have you eaten from the tree whose fruit I commanded you not to eat?

Now at this point, you would think both Adam and Eve would be like, okay, he's got us. We've messed up, we need to come clean with God, we need to accept responsibility. Is that what they did? The answer is K-N-O-W-P. Nope, they did not, okay, that's what my roommate would always say. Verse 12, the man replied, it was the woman you gave me who gave me the fruit and I ate it. It's not my fault, it's her fault. It was his fault. Actually, he was blaming God. You did this. Before Eve came along, I was doing just fine. I was just walking around minding my own business and all of a sudden she's shoving a mango in my face. It's not my fault. It's your fault, God. What was I supposed to do? It's ridiculous. Look at Eve, verse 13. Then the Lord God asked the woman, what have you done? And what does the woman say? The serpent deceived me. It's the devil's fault. You ever heard that? The devil made me do it? The serpent deceived me. That's why I ate it. What's amazing about this moment is it's the first two human beings who ever existed. And what did they do? They blamed everybody else.

They blamed everybody else for their problems. Actually, you can look at three different specific people that the scripture teaches that we blame. Sometimes we blame God. This is your fault, God. You created this. Sometimes we blame others. It was her fault. It was his fault. It was their fault. And sometimes we blame the devil. The devil made me do it. I want you to think about one area of your life where you might feel stuck right now. Just kind of ponder that. What's an area of your life that you might feel stuck? I'll just kind of go back through the ones, was it marriage, kids, relationships, work, family member friendships, failure in the past. Here's what I can almost guarantee. There's something hardwired inside of you that wants to blame where you are on one of those three things, God, others, or the devil. Blaming someone else and not taking responsibility ourselves is a problem. We can't and won't make peace with our past or move forward towards a better future until we take responsibility. So I'm going to keep kind of going through this idea of temptation. I mentioned like, where are you stuck? I'm going to ask it a different way. What temptation is Satan causing you or tempting you to trust your way instead of God's way? So let's say you might be married. Ephesians chapter 5 verse 21 says this, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. I preach that verse at almost every wedding that I officiate.

And a lot of people are like, submit? I don't want to give in to her or I don't want to give in to him. That sounds like a disaster. That sounds like a miserable life. That's not what the word means in the original language. It doesn't mean to give in. It means to give to. It means I'm going to put, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. I'm going to put God first. I'm going to put my spouse second, and I get to be third. So when I'm giving to God and I'm serving and giving to my spouse out of love for God, then all of a sudden things start to get better when each person is doing that. But if I'm just like, you know what? I don't care what God has to say. I don't care what my spouse has to say. I want me to be number one. That's where all the problems come on. When the priority system gets out of order, that's where all the challenges are. How about kids? Proverbs chapter 22 verse 6 says this, direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it. That's such a fascinating verse. I just want to read it again. Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it. So a lot of people are like, my kids are struggling in like college age or young adult age. As long as you raised them to know and love the Lord, they'll come back. It's what the Bible says. And ultimately, your role as a parent is to do everything you can while they are young to direct them to God, because guess what?

They will grow up. And when they grow up, that's it. They're gone. And so if you miss that moment, you've missed a pretty big moment. And we've got to make sure that we're doing everything that we can so I'd encourage everyone to prioritize that over everything, getting them to know and love the Lord, not what's easiest and best for you. How about finances? In Proverbs chapter three, verses nine and 10, it says, honor the Lord with your wealth and with the best part of everything you produce, then he will fill your barns full of grain and your vats will overflow with good wine. Are we putting God first in our finances? There's a blessing that comes along with that. Or are we putting God last in our finances and just going after all the different things that we want and he gets the leftovers? How about relationships? Ephesians chapter four, verse two, it says, always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other's faults because of your love. That's a great verse, isn't it? Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other's... faults because of your love. You know, you can just see it in people, can't you? I can just see it in myself. If I'm humble and gentle and patient and making allowances, the relationship generally works out pretty good. But if I'm arrogant and abrasive and strong and not patient and have no pay and no allowance, I might get what I want, but it usually doesn't end very well. How about failure? I love this verse. This is like maybe on the top 10 verses in all the Bible. It says, the godly may trip seven times, but they will get up again. But one disaster is enough to overthrow the wicked. The idea is we're going to fail. We're going to struggle. We're going to have challenges. But even if we get knocked down seven times, we'll get up again, and God will restore us, and we can have a relationship with Him. One disaster is enough to overthrow the wicked, and that's really a sad thing. Sometimes I think some of Satan's

greatest lies and tricks is to tell us that one mistake we made is going to haunt us the rest of our life. It's not true. It's not true. God forgives. God restores. Let me ask you a question. What temptation from Satan is causing you to trust your way instead of God's way? Let me say that again. What temptation from Satan? He's still the same guy. He's not a serpent anymore. He's just tempting us all these different ways. What temptation from Satan is causing you to trust your way instead of God's way? And once you get that figured out, what do you need to confess to God and take responsibility for instead of hiding or blaming others? You know, it's just so silly how we do that sometimes. Years ago, Rochelle's parents were in, her dad was in. He's a great guy. He's passed on to be with the Lord. Just a phenomenal man, and he loves sweets. And we had, everybody was in, and then we had left, and we left our dog, and the dog never did anything wrong. It was a really good dog, Rascal. And there was this pan of brownies that were on the counter, the kitchen counter. You know where this is going, right? So, we weren't thinking. We got back, and you know, Rascal would usually come to the door and greet us. He didn't. He was just kind of hunched over in the corner. Well, that's odd. But we didn't care. We had just gone somewhere. We were having a great time, and we were starting to eat the brownies. And Rochelle's dad, Dennis, would say, boy, these are really good. Usually, the frosting is a little too heavy, and it's pretty light, and I really, really like these. And as he was talking, we looked down and realized the dog had licked the brownie icing off of the brownies, and he was eating. Oh, man. And he felt, the dog felt so bad about it. He was hiding in the corner. He was like, I know I did something wrong. It was just too enticing. Maybe we need to repent. Maybe we need to take responsibility. I'm sure Rascal, if he could talk, would have said, well, you left it right there in front of me. What was I supposed to do? Acts chapter 3, verse 19, a beautiful scripture says this, now repent of your sins and turn to God so that your sins may be wiped away. Isn't that great? God doesn't want you to be hanging out in the corner, depressed and alone and full of shame and blame. He wants us to come to Him. Repent of your sins, turn to God so that your sins may be wiped away. God wants us to come to Him and not to hide. First John chapter 1, verse 9 says, this is a promise, if we confess our sins to Him, He is faithful and just. He's always there, and He's always right. He is faithful and just to forgive us of our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness. I think a lot of people, myself included, sometimes we can feel a little dirty. We're just, we don't measure up. And God says, don't do that. I want to cleanse you from that wickedness. He is faithful and just. So,

all of these things, to say this one thing, this one question to you, what do you need to confess to God and take responsibility for instead of hiding or blaming others? Let me just ask that question again. What do you need to confess to God and take responsibility for, come clean, instead of hiding and or blaming others? If you can answer that question and live that out, there's a lot of good things in front of you. If you ignore that question and decide not to live it out, there's going to be a lot of challenges that are going to come your way. So here we go. We're going to make our declaration as we conclude our time today, and we're going to go to our next meeting. Thank you for joining us. We're gonna make it to God. We're gonna make a promise. We're gonna live it out. Here we go, ready? One, two, three. This year, with God's help and the power of the Holy Spirit, I declare I will take responsibility for my life. Thanks for being with us today. We've got a little QR code that you can scan. And in that, you'll have an opportunity to receive prayer, communion, worship, talk to a pastor, connect in a Bible study, be baptized, whatever it is that you would need, we'd love to be able to serve you. We look forward to meeting you there.