Stop Being a Grumbler | Adam Weber

Just like a magnet, our life produces a force that either attracts or repels the people around us. Let me just say that again. Just like a magnet, our life produces a force that either attracts or repels the people around us. I really see today as the start of a brand new year as a church. In many ways, this is our January 1st. After a long summer, people start coming back to church. We really start to feel and see momentum. And with that, I just want to say, if over summer you've been hit or miss in making it to church, there is no judgment, zero judgment whatsoever. But I do want to challenge you to get back on track for the sake of your friends. Get here for the sake of your own soul. Get here. Dads, I just want to challenge you men for the sake of your marriage, for the sake of your kids, make it a priority. Something powerful happens when the dad of the house leads the charge in getting to church. I just have this idea that I'm guessing many of the wives will find you husbands more attractive if you actually help in making that a priority. But friends, as we look into this new year, I am so excited to see all that God is going to do in and through this imperfect church called embrace. Okay, so today we are starting up a brand new series called Magnetic. And for me personally, I've always found magnets to be so cool.

I'm like, what is it about a piece of metal like this? As a kid, it's almost like magnets are our magic. Again, I can remember just being a little boy and being in awe of what they can do. But a magnet, it's an object that generates a magnetic field. But because it's invisible to the human eye, you can't see the force itself. And yet it's there and it's real. Again, it's almost like magic. Also, with every magnet, there's a North Pole and there is a South Pole. And the opposite poles attract each other, while the like poles, they repel each other. And a fun fact, the Earth itself is a giant magnet, which is why the Earth has a North Pole and a South Pole to it. With that information, some of you are like, my mind is blown right now. Today, though, for the sake of our series, I want to give us a definition of a magnet. A magnet is an object that produces a force that either attracts or repels certain materials. This is a magnet. Okay, so here's the truth, though. Just like a magnet, our life produces a force that either attracts or repels the people around us. Let me just say that again. Just like a magnet, our life produces a force that either attracts or repels the people around us. And this right here is something we've all experienced, right? Like there are certain people that everyone in the room is

just drawn to, like you just want to talk with them, even just be in their presence. And people will even say that person, they're magnetic or they have a magnetic personality. A specific example, hopefully the first time you met your spouse, you were attracted to. There's that word attracted to them. Again, there are certain people that just have this glow, or you could say there are certain people that just have a force that just kind of pulls you towards them. Unfortunately, though, the opposite is true as well. There are certain people that just repel other people. An example, your mother-in-law. To be clear, not my mother-in-law, your mother-in-law. Diane, if you're watching online right now, I love you so much. Okay, maybe it's a person that you work with, and whenever they enter the room, it's like a cloud enters the room with them. Maybe it's a family member that just has this negative force around them. Maybe it's a neighbor or a friend of yours who's just kind of hard to be around very long because they just kind of repel you and everyone else. Once again, we've all experienced this with other people. But friends, don't miss this. The same is true for you, your life and mine. It produces a force that either attracts people towards or it repels. So just getting honest with yourself for a moment. What does your life do?

What about you? Does your life attract? Or does it repel? Every so often I'll hear a person say, yeah, I used to care about what other people thought about me, and now I just don't care at all. And like, I'm just gonna be mean. If they can't handle it, they can just avoid me because I don't care what they think. Now, a part of that is good. I mean, hopefully at some point, all of us will gain the confidence to fully be and become the person that God has created us to be. But if you're a Jesus fowler, you don't get to say that anymore. You don't get to say that anymore. Yes, Jesus fowlers, you and I, and this almost feels un-American, you and I, we gave up the right. You actually gave up the right to just be rough around the edges and not care about other people or about what other people think because as Jesus fowlers, it's no longer just about attracting or repelling people towards you. Instead, the day that we started following Jesus, it's now about attracting others towards him. You see, as Jesus fowlers, whether we wanna be or not, you and I, we are called. For some of us, that's not strong enough language.

As Jesus fowlers, you and I, we're commanded. Again, you follow Jesus, you've surrendered that right. You and I, we're called and we're commanded to be magnetic, which is why this series is so important. Okay, so in the weeks to come, we're gonna talk about having a magnetic faith and also talk about being a magnetic church. And in the last week of the series, we're gonna talk about the times that we should intentionally repel others. But today, our focus is this. What does it look like to have a magnetic life? What does it look like to have a magnetic life? Like what does it look like to live in such a way that attracts other people towards us, but not just towards us, instead to the Jesus that we follow? And today to answer this, I wanna look at the words of a guy named Paul. If you have a Bible with you, I wanna encourage you to open it up to the book of Philippians chapter two. You can use the Bible on your phone if you'd like. Just to note it, Paul wrote these words from prison to a group of Jesus followers in the city of Philippi. And starting in verse three of chapter two, here is what Paul says. He says, do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather in humility, value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests,

but each of you to the interests of others. In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus. In the New Living Translation, it says you must have the same attitude as Christ Jesus. Paul's basically telling us if you wanna have a magnetic life, if you wanna attract people to Christ, Paul says have the attitude of Jesus. Again, if you wanna attract other people, not just to yourself, but instead to the Jesus inside of you, have the attitude of Christ. Now, I don't know about you, but the older I get, the harder it is to have a good attitude, right? I mean, it's like one of the most challenging predicaments. I mean, one moment I'm prideful, and the very next moment I'm a martyr, and I just wish everyone knew how hard my life is compared to everyone else, and the next moment I'm something completely else. And so when I read these words from Paul out of the Bible, there's something in me that's just like, well, that's easy for you to say, Paul, because you're in the Bible. Just to remind us, Paul wrote these words from prison, and he's in prison not because he did something stupid. That's why you and I go to prison. We do stupid stuff. Not because he did something stupid, but because instead he was telling people about Jesus.

And if ever for a moment you get in a soapbox and you think your life is hard, listen to this. At one point, Paul, he says, I've faced death again and again. Three times I was beaten with rods. Once I was pelted with stones. Three times I was shipwrecked. I spent a day and a night and a day in the open sea. I've been constantly on the move. He goes on to share more. Friends, this is the guy who's telling us to have the attitude of Christ. I don't know about you. He has some street cred in my eyes. I'll just say it. Whether you're Paul and you're in prison, or you're an average Joe, and you have a sweet minivan, and life is pretty stinking great. If you're looking for reasons to have a bad attitude. attitude, you'll find it. I mean, seriously, if you're looking for a reason to be offended every single day, you'll find it. Looking for a reason to be jaded, looking for a reason to be negative, you will find it. I promise you will, but just the opposite is true as well. Inside of every single day, if you start looking for reasons to be thankful, if you start looking for reasons to smile,

inside of every day, even the hardest day, if you start looking for blessings in your life, you will find that too. Just to ask the question, have you ever met someone that has the attitude of Jesus? Before they speak, you can just feel it. They have the attitude of Christ. Specifically, is there a person that has a great attitude, not just when their life is great, but they have the attitude of Jesus, even when a day or their lives as a whole are really, really challenging? Ever met someone like that? If you've been here very long, you've heard me share about my dad, Jim. I love and respect my dad so much. For the last 15 years though, health-wise, my dad has faced one hard, brutal thing after the next. Horrible. Well, recently, he had a spot on his foot. It's like, what else? And it wouldn't heal, and so he ended up losing a toe and a part of his foot. Well, after surgery, he had to stay off his feet for several weeks, which was the worst part for him because he's antsy like me, or more accurately, I'm antsy like him. So he stays off his feet for several weeks, super careful, several weeks pass, and after all this time,

my dad's foot ended up getting another infection. This is just a couple of weeks ago. So we found out he's gonna lose more of his foot. So I went to visit him in the hospital, and when I got to his room here in town, I sat down in a chair, I was just so frustrated for him. And so I just said, dad, how are you feeling? Like, really, how are you feeling? He said, well, you know, Adam, all in all, it's been a pretty great experience so far. I'm like, dad, what part of this has been a great experience? I'm at Avera, this is not a great experience, this is a sucky experience. And he said, well, the nurses here have been awesome, and so has the food, the cod here is so good. I'm like, dad, first off, that's disgusting. They serve cod at a hospital? Gross. But seriously, though, my dad is so far from perfect, but in the most non-flashy, genuine way, my dad is magnetic. And to be clear, it's not just because he has an upbeat attitude, no, it's because Jesus is inside of my dad. It's not just because he's an upbeat person, no, it's because of Christ inside of him. Some practical advice for us, you and I have to realize our attitude, it's a choice.

Every single day, you have a choice. And friends, the easy choice is to play the victim card. And some of us have reasons to play the victim card. It's a choice, though, my life has been so hard, my job is so stressful, my kids drive me insane, I've gone through so much, I've been dealt a bad hand at life. Seriously, are you going through something hard? Yes, so is my dad. Are you going through trials? Oh man, so is Paul. But Adam, I've been betrayed, I've been hurt, I've been screwed over, so is Jesus. Yes, so is the rest of the universe. Your attitude and mine and how we respond, it's a choice. And you're the owner of it, no one else's. And the choice you make and I make, it matters so much, why? Because every single day, when we enter a room, people can immediately feel our attitude. You could almost say it's almost like a magnet that has this force that you can't see, but you can feel it. And our attitude either attracts people, Or it repels them just to be direct. What is your family feel when you come home each day? What is your roommate feel? What is your kids feel? What is your spouse feel when you enter the house and they hear the door hit? What are your classmates feel when you get to school each day?

How do your co-workers feel when they know that you're there? Does it attract them? Does it repel them? Does it draw them? It's like this force that brings them closer to Jesus or does it push them away? Hard stuff to get honest about, isn't it? Confession for me, all week I've been convicted. For my family, my wife, my kids, the team that I work closest with, they were to answer the question. Some days they'd probably say that Adam's fun and encouraging to be around. He's great. But then other days that they were honest, they'd probably say that Adam can be intense, easily irritated. Friends, I don't want the people in my life that I love the most, people that I'd be willing to give up my own life for to have to wonder what version of me, of dad, of Adam are they going to get today? Lord, every day help us, help me to choose. It's a choice to choose your attitude, the attitude of Jesus. Going back to Paul's words again in verse 5, Paul says in your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus. It goes on to say, who being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage. Paul goes on to say, rather he, God himself, made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness, and being found in appearance as a man. Jesus, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death, even

death on a cross. Just to highlight this, Paul's saying that even though Jesus is God, that God took on the very nature of a servant. Paul's basically saying if you want to have a magnetic life, if you want to attract people in, he's telling us to take on the heart of a servant. You want to draw people closer to you more than you, you want to pull people closer to Jesus. Paul tells us take on the heart of a servant. At least for me, one of the most magnetic qualities a person can have is when it's so clear that their life is not about them. Ever met someone like that? Like in a conversation at work, you're just around, it's just so clear. It's not about, it's not about them. Typically though, when we think about being magnetic, we think about the person who's charismatic and they're outgoing and they're the life of a party. But honestly, that stuff gets old pretty quickly and a lot of times underneath all the shininess isn't much substance. With that, can I get an amen in the house of God from all the introverts that make up Embrace Church Their Home? It's the exact response I expected from a group of introverts. Okay, I see you and God sees you and now you're like, please stop seeing me. I love introverts, God does too. Okay, Jesus came for them as well. But truly, you don't need to be flashy to be magnetic. You don't need to be an extrovert to be magnetic. When you come across another person who is genuine and they

look you in the eye and you can just tell they're looking to serve, not to be seen or noticed, but simply because they care. Man, that's a powerful force. Without words, it's just magnetic. Everybody can feel it. This week as I was looking at these words from Paul in chapter two here, what struck me is that Jesus took the step down towards us. Again, we're told that God made himself nothing. He chose to make himself nothing by taking the nature of a servant. Jesus himself is God, yet he took the step down. I'll just say it, you and I, every single day, we are never looking to take the step down. Ever. Never. We're constantly looking to take the steps up at work, status wise, friend group wise, financially. We only want to take steps up, steps down, failure. Steps down, embarrassment. Steps down, why would you do such a thing? Jesus is God. Take steps down. What does this look like? What does it look like to take steps down? Well, it starts in the heart. Every day, it's realizing you and I, we're not the main character, Jesus is. And so by keeping our eyes on Jesus,

it's centering your day and your attitude, your schedule, even your thoughts, not around you, yourself, and you, but instead around God and the people around you. Practically speaking, there's the basic ways to take steps down. Simplest ways, opening up the door for a total stranger. The simplest ways, helping your neighbor out, when you clearly see they have a need instead of trying to hide. It's intentionally stepping down and giving a younger person around you an opportunity. It's making a connection for someone not to further your career, but theirs. Honestly, a powerful way to step down is by simply being a good listener and actually listening to the person that's standing in front of you. It's being present and truly listening, not being in la-la land, not thinking about what's coming next in your day, not wishing that you could be in a different conversation with a slightly more important person. Friends, when we do this, not just one time, not just here and there, not just the acute service project. That's not the heart of a servant. No, not when we want to get seen or recognized, but when we begin to consistently take on the heart of a servant. When we begin to daily, intentionally take the steps down, there are a few things that will be more magnetic to the world around us,

much so that people will be drawn to the Jesus inside of us, the heart of a servant. So I want to go back to Paul's words again. In verse 14, Paul says this, do everything without grumbling or arguing so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation. Friends, if you want to have a magnetic life, if you want people to be drawn to you, but more than you, drawn to the Jesus inside of you, Paul tells us to use your words without grumbling. Use your words without grumbling. Another honest question, are you a person who grumbles? Just be honest, are you a grumbler? The word that Paul uses here, it can also translate to murmuring or muttering or having a secret debate. I love that picture. Ever had a secret debate with yourself about how terrible your day, life, everything is? Just to acknowledge it, we typically grumble. When we're unsatisfied about something. And it's often done quietly underneath our breath. And when we grumble, we're typically focused on the problem without looking for an actual solution. Translation, grumbling rarely changes anything. And speaking of being magnetic, few things repel people more than grumbling. No one, and I mean no one wants to be around a grumbler. Not friends, not family members, literally grandkids don't want to be around

their grandparents that grumble. No one wants to be around a grumbler except other grumblers. And what a miserable existence that is. And I say this gently, for some of us, that's our lives. For some of us, if we look around at our inner circle, we're surrounded by grumblers or even worse. We find ourselves totally alone because throughout our lives or throughout this last season, we've repelled everyone around us through grumbling. All throughout the Old Testament, the people of God constantly grumbled. They grumbled about this, they grumbled about that. And what they were telling God is that they were unsatisfied with Him. Unsatisfied with Him. Friends, when we grumble, it's the opposite of worshiping God. Even if our grumbling isn't directed at God, it's basically telling the Lord that He's not enough, that what He's provided us isn't good, that we're unhappy and unsatisfied with Him. Think about that the next time you grumble. Opposite, worship, convicting, but that's not enough. I thought this quote from C.S. Lewis was powerful and honestly outright scary. C.S. says, hell begins with a grumbling mood, always complaining, always blaming others. The grumble itself going on forever like a machine. It is not a question of God sending us to hell.

In each of us, there's something growing which will be hell unless it is nipped in the bud. He's basically saying that when we grumble, it just grows and it grows and it grows and it grows, slowly becoming hell itself inside of us. So here's the truth. Instead of using our breath to grumble, instead of using our words to grumble, there's such a better way that we can use both. In Proverbs, King Solomon, he tells us this, gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. I thought that was so powerful. Gracious words are sweet to the soul, healing to the bones. Friends, if grumbling repels people, gracious words attract them. And so instead of grumbling, it's using our words each day to give thanks. Instead of using our words to complain about others, we use our words to encourage them. It's using our words to heal others, literally. It's using our words to speak purpose into others. It's using our words to share wisdom, God's wisdom with others. Words can literally alter the course of a person's life. But Adam, I'm not good with words. I've never been really good with my words. You don't have to be. Thankfully, you don't have to be a poet.

Honestly, a few simple words from a genuine heart at the right time has so much power. My wife, Beck, is not a huge talker. Far from being a chatty Kathy. But when she uses her words to encourage me, to say I love you, or to thank me for something, I feel like I can run through a brick wall. I feel unstoppable. I also think about a friend who recently, I don't even think he realized how much it meant to me. He said, Adam, one of your strengths is that you can see things that other people can't. You have the gift of vision. With a gift of vision, I felt deeply encouraged. I've shared this before, but back in high school, one Sunday after sharing in church for a few minutes, I'll never forget my pastor telling me, Adam, I think you have a gift. I didn't even know what he meant. It changed everything about me. Friends, how are you using your words? You wanna be magnetic? You wanna pull people closer to Jesus? Use your words without grumbling. And added side note, I just wanna ask, how are you using your words online? How are you using your words online? I don't say this lightly. I'm often embarrassed by what some people will type in the comments section.

They'll write something horrible, and then you go to their profile, very top of it. I had several friends tell me this exact thing. You go to the very top of their profile, and there's a Bible verse. Again, I say this gently, but for the sake of my friends who don't know Christ, for the sake of my family members who don't know the Lord that I'm praying for every single day, friend, if you have no intent or desire to change how you use your words in person or online, please stop. I beg you with the Bible verses. Once again, friends, for all of us, use your words without grumbling. Okay, so this is sum things up. Paul, he tells us all throughout chapter two, have the attitude of Jesus. Take on the heart of a servant. Use your words without grumbling. And then my favorite part of this chapter, just listen to what Paul tells us will happen when we do this. Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky. How rad is that? I don't know about you, but one of my favorite things is taking in stars that night. If you need to be reminded, the darker the night is, the brighter the stars shine. Paul's saying when we live these things. things out in our dark world, you'll stick out. People will see you. They'll be drawn to you. If

you live these things out just like a star, you will shine. You will catch people's attention. You'll catch their eyes, and they'll be attracted not only to your life, but to Christ inside of you. Paul's basically saying, if you live these things out, you'll be magnetic. You'll be magnetic. Live this way. Have the attitude of Jesus. The heart of a servant. Use your words without grumbling. Instead of being repelled by you, you'll be drawn to the Jesus that you follow. And so friends, let's pray across all campuses. Before we do that question, I just want to highlight it. Are you a grumbler? I said it earlier. For me, I don't want to do the song and dance of church anymore. I got no time for it. I have no desire to come in, kind of take my seat, look all Christian-y and whatever else. No, I want Jesus to change me. I want to be changed by him. And so if you're here and you're like, I'm a grumbler, but this is just who I am. No, it's not. The same power that raised Christ from the dead dwells inside you. That's the old you. That's the person that you used to be. I'm 60 years old. It's too late. No, actually, it's never too late. We have a God who on the third day rose his son back from the grave. And so no longer can you say, it's just me. It's just kind of my temperament. No, no, no, no. Same power that raised Christ from the dead dwells inside of you. And so if you're here, if you're hearing my voice right now and you're a grumbler and you long to be transformed, let's pray. Gracious Father, we come before you thankful for who you are. Thankful that when we feel messy and broken and jaded and hurting, that you don't give up on us. Thankful that when we don't want to be with ourselves, we're just so annoyed with ourselves. We're so thankful in those moments you get closer. I'm also so grateful that you speak in a way that we can understand. And yet you also speak in a way out of love that you challenge us. And so I pray for that person hearing my voice right now who's a grumbler. In Christ, that is no longer who they are. And so I ask that you would rewire the way we think. You would rewire our attitude. You would rewire our souls. And God, we cannot change ourselves. Some of us have tried to change. We can't change ourselves, but it's by your strength within us that we can change. And so I pray that you would fill us, that you would overflow us with your Holy Spirit, because we want to become more like you. And God, I pray in the moment that we fall short, it's going to happen, where we start complaining. The moment we see it, we would just stop and just confess it. God, I'm not worshiping you. I'm complaining about you. So would you forgive me? Would you get me back on track? Lord, we love you. We thank you. We praise you.

We pray all these things in the name of Jesus. Amen.