Remember Who You Are | 1 Samuel 25

Now, Samuel died. That's not a throwaway. - No. - Yeah. - Because Samuel, up to that point, was David's spiritual guide. - He was a compass. He was David's compass. - He was David's compass, right? - Oh, wow. - So Samuel leaving is a big deal. - That's right. - And then who's the next person that's introduced? Abigail. - Abigail. - Wow. - So God was using Abigail to become the compass that David needed. - Wow. - I never noticed that before. - Yeah, and she does that by telling David who he is. - This is the Crossroads Daily. No experts, no perfect people, just honest conversations about what happens when the Bible shows up in real life. - Hey, I'm Deebo. - And I'm Chuck. - I'm Alex. - And I'm Josh. - Thanks for joining us for the conversation today. The daily scripture was 1 Samuel 25. And it's so funny, we've been talking about David, who's this king on the run. And honestly, we've been kind of celebrating the fact that like, for the most part, he's kind of been trusting God in the midst of a really hard situation. - Mm-hmm. - Until today. - Mm-hmm. - Yeah, we were hyping him up yesterday. - Yeah. - Such good choices.

- Yeah. - I didn't do the bad things. - Right, yeah. - Yeah. - Today, Guy offends him, and David's like, "Let's kill them all," right? - Yeah. - And Abigail, who actually is the wife of the man he was gonna kill, helps David see it from a different perspective. I'm wondering, I'm guessing, I should say, we've all had situations where maybe it wasn't "Let's kill them all," but we were ready to do scorched earth on something. - Yeah, or maybe it was. (all laughing) - That's true. (all laughing) - Right, Alex, let's not assume. And I wonder, can you think of a time when someone helps you see the situation differently and helps you make a better choice? - Yeah. - Yeah. What comes to mind? - I don't feel like it's like this anymore for me, but there was a time when I first got married when I feel like any situation that came up at work. I would tell Cameron, "I think I should just quit." (all laughing) Like, I don't know. I don't know. I had just started my job when we were first married, and so I was like, I don't know if this is the job for me. This is really hard. I don't know if this person sees it the same way as I do,

so whatever. And Cameron was always the one to be like, "I'm so sorry you feel that way." And let's like, acquitting was never gonna be the answer. - Right. - I just always, I don't know why. - That's your default. - I jumped to, I should just quit. And he was always like, "Okay, great." And maybe let's look at this a little bit differently. And I'm sure it was just like a lot of emotions in the way that I was responding to conflict and wanting to avoid things at the time that was just like my defense mechanism. But he did have to step in and help me process through that. Thankfully, I'm not in that unhealth. You have a place anymore, everyone. I don't try to quit my job. - That's good. - It's like yesterday, no? - That actually tries to quit like three times a year. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Only once last week. - That's right, only once last week. - Nah, that's good, that's good. I think about, I used to run, I still do with some friends. And you know, when you're running multiple miles, you get into lots of conversations. And this was one of those days where the conversation was around a frustration I was having with someone and it was in a work context too.

And for me, it was like, I'm ready to, like I'm ready to ask this person. Like I'm ready to ask them. And my friend listened for miles. I mean, literally for miles, as I talked about, all the reasons why I was right and why I should do this. And at the end of all that we're running, and I just remember him like saying, yeah, I think you're wrong. (laughing) I don't think you see this right. - Yeah, yeah. - What a good friend. - I think you're trying to avoid, like, I was just like, wait, you're supposed to be on my side. But it's like, no, but I needed that. And that, I mean, that decision, that decision would have changed the trajectory of an organization that I was leading in a way that would have been incredibly hurtful and harmful. And man, I just am so thankful for him having the courage and love to tell me like, dude, this is not a wise decision, you know? And that's what Abigail does for David. I think it's not lost on me. And sometimes the clues are in the transition statements in the Bible. So interestingly, this chapter starts with these words. Now, Samuel died. That's not a throwaway.

- No. - Because Samuel, up to that point, was David's spiritual guy. - You got it, let's go. - Oh, wow. - So Samuel leaving is a big deal. - That's right. - And then who's the next person that's introduced? Abigail. - Abigail. - Wow. - So God was using Abigail to become the compass that David needed. - Wow, I never never stopped before. - Yeah, and she does that by telling David who he is. I love the story. What strikes you guys just in the story, how's your approach? - That's what I was thinking about when you're asking us like what is where's the anger thing for me? And I immediately thought of Abigail didn't just say, don't do that. She said, remember who you are. - Remember who you are. - And so for me, like my life could be split into two, scorched earth, nothing but it. - Yeah. - And trying not to be that. - Yeah. - And the dividing line for me, I mean, first and foremost as the Lord, but then also inviting in trusted people like an Abigail,

like a Samuel and being able to have this open forum, much like you're running from where they're not going to, they're not going to just tell me, no, I think that's wrong. They're going to remind me who I am now. So what was scorched earth? And let's fix everything with anger and violence or whatever, or whatever. - Whatever your reaction is to now this becoming, I was like, say, I'm becoming, I'm not there, I'm becoming this new not scorched earth thing. It's those, it's the Abigails. - It is. - It's the Samuels, it's the people you invite in and you give them permission. You know, you let them say, not just you're wrong. - Yes. - But remember who you are. - Remember who you are. - Remember who you are. - That's so powerful, man. - Yeah. - That's so good. - And it's so easy to forget when you are in grief or when you are in trial. - Or survival. - Yes. - Whatever. - Yes. - Confusion, transition.

Like you can name it. It's so easy to forget who you are, who God says you are. - That's right. - Yeah, I'm imagining David probably felt like all this restraint was like bubbling up. - That's right. - That's right. - All right, I'm just gonna call this dude. - That's right. - Yeah, like after all this time of suppressing this, like feel it, not suppressing, but just knowing that God has told me not to do this, it's all. Okay, I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna do it. And it's cool at the end of the chapter that David is like, I would have done this. - That's exactly right. - It like dawns on him. - Yes. - And I think that in the moment when our emotions can just take over, we just forget. We can forget. - We do. - Yeah, so I relate to that. - Yeah. - Yeah, I can't imagine if I actually would have quit my job, like if I would have had Cameron be like, okay. - That's right. That's right. - Like what if I actually would have let my emotions

and the situation at the time take over? I can't imagine. - Well, and the beauty of grace for us right now is that we can look back in our lives and go, that's when I did screw up, when I did do that thing, I can look at it and go, oh. - You're right. - That's what it was. - Yeah. - And the beauty of grace is I can look at those things, the mistakes I made, the times when it was anger. - Yeah, that's good. - And I can look at it right in the face and go, that's what it looked like. - That's right. - I get to learn and the grace of God, I just want to like grab myself like 20 years ago and see, the grace of God is enough for you, buddy. So just relax and yes, it sucks. Yes, you did something bad. What are you going to do about it? - That's right, that's right. - You know? - That's so good. I love David's words to Abigail. After Abigail stops him from doing the foolish thing, he says this to her, this is in verse 32, says, "And David said to Abigail, 'Blessed be the Lord, the God of Israel, who sent you this day to meet me.

And I love this line, 'Blessed be your discretion. 'Blessed be you who have kept me this day from blood guilt and from working salvation with my own hand. I think the thing that I see in David in this story that I am guilty of is trying to work salvation from my own hands through you." And that's what Abigail saved him from. 'Cause I don't know about you, but whenever I try to work salvation from my own, it never goes well. That's never the right call, but it's so easy to wanna do that. And so, yeah, I just wonder, as you think about something in your life, where is a place for maybe even now you're wanting to surrender? I don't wanna work this by my own hand. I'll go back to what you said, Alex. I feel it in my work. I feel it in my work. I feel like it's a season of a lot of transition right now. And there's a way I want to do things. There's a way that I wanna see things happen. And the temptation is to try to politic or influence to make it happen the way that I think it should happen. 'Cause, of course, I'm right. Of course, that's what you're happening. - Of course, you are. - Right?

- Right? And what I'm realizing is more and more I want you to open your hands and trust me and just be where you are. - Wow. - And just trust it. I will work all the macro out, right? And I will also work it out right for you. And it's hard to do that. I wanna bring something about it. - I want the checklist that guides me through it. I want the exact, so I did this, great check, did this. Okay, now I know I'm right. - Yeah. - It does not exist, so I'm just not. We're going on faith, we're going on courage, we're going on all those things and we're going, I don't know, Lord, please, that's right. I don't know, Lord, please. That should be our prayer forever. I don't know. - I don't know, Lord, please. That's a great one to start with the morning, right? - I don't know, Lord, please. - Good morning, I don't know, Lord, please. - That's right. - Man, I love that. And maybe there's an Abigail whispering in your ear, maybe not even whispering. God has put someone in your life to be that wise counsel,

to give you discretion if you don't have it. I just wanna encourage you, man, it might be hard to listen. You might wanna take matters into your own hands, but God has given you that voice as a protection. And I just wanna say, for some of us, we may not have a person. You know what, the only Abigail might be this, might be God's word, it might be you being in community through what we're doing here, or you just asking God, God, would you show me in your word how to lead my life? I've been amazed at the times that God has helped me to find the right passage at the right time. That's exactly what I need for the moment that I'm facing. I believe he does that, and I believe he can do that in your life as well. (upbeat music) (upbeat music) [MUSIC PLAYING]