It's not you, it's me

Welcome, welcome. Happy Sunday. How are you all doing today? So if I haven't had the privilege and the honor of meeting you yet, my name is Natalie and I get to serve here on the online host team. And I'm Melanie and I get the privilege and honor to serve today alongside Natalie as your online host. Welcome. Happy Sunday. Happy February 1st of the month. It's Pray First Sunday. And speaking of Pray First Sunday, we would love to pray with alongside you. We'd love to pray over your petition. So go ahead and scan the QR code, drop your prayer request in the comments. And we have our stage host live praying over your request as we speak. So make sure you get those prayer requests in. Yes, we want to hear from you. We want to pray alongside you today. And we want to know where you're watching from, where you are today, how you're staying warm on this chilly brick Sunday. It is 22 degrees in Florida, y'all. Absolutely. Yeah, it's unheard of this weather, right? But we are powering through it. So we're also excited because our love, sex and marriage series starts today. Yes. And it's one of the most popular ones here at Journey. So get ready because the word is coming in hot for the month of February. Absolutely. And let's talk a little bit about last week. What we got from a message from Pastor JJ last week, he spoke a profound message. Yes. And one of the takeaways that I took from it was that he used an illustration of a compass and how when we're in a certain situation where we feel like we can't see God or we don't know what God is doing in that situation that we need to reorient. We need to take out our compass and we need to find God in every situation and bring him into that situation. And whatever you need from him and whatever you need him to be in that situation, he will be. He will be your healing if that's what you need. He will be your protection if that's what you need. He will be your provision if that's what you need. How about you, Natalie? What did you get? I really love chapter John 15 5. It's my favorite verse in the Bible. So I just really loved how he spoke about dwelling in the Lord and what you fix your eyes on ultimately determines how the situation will look to you, how you'll handle the situation. So that really, really stuck with me. I'm excited just to keep getting some more of those gems from Pastor J.J. like we do every week. We're gonna go ahead and transition over to the lobby with Kyla. Kyla, what did you get from last week's message? What's up Journey Church Online family? For me, I would say that Jesus doesn't stay in the four walls of the church, right? He goes with us even after Sundays in our car, at our work, at our school, in our home. He's always with us and he wants us to be with him. Well, like they said

upstairs, my name is Kyla and I get the privilege of serving as one of your online hosts today. And y'all, I'm excited when they say in the studio that the sermon is gonna come in hot. I pray so because I'm freezing and the only thing keeping me warm right now is my excitement to get to chit-chat with you guys before we start service. I don't know if they said it upstairs but we are kicking off our love, sex, and marriage series. So get ready. It's gonna be a full month of teachings about relationships. Rather if it's platonic, romantic, lean in. I think it's gonna be super impactful. Another thing that's super exciting is that our small groups are open for business, guys. We have so many different small groups you can join based on your age. Men's groups, women's groups, interest, whatever spiritual discipline that you want to get better in this season of your life, there's different ones for that. For prayer, for journaling, anything you could think of. And the cool thing about it is you can go on the Journey Church app, click online campus, and it will filter all of the different small groups that you can join and be a part of even when you're online. Small groups have changed my life coming from Florida, from out of state. I've really gotten the opportunity to build a community here. Last thing is that it's Pray First Sunday. At Journey Church we believe that prayer is a first response and so we want you to drop your prayer requests in the chat. Our live host, Chantel, is going to be praying over them. We want you to receive the same prayer and blessing that everybody in this building is going to receive today. Let's get ready to go to the auditorium and prepare our hearts for worship and we'll see you back in the lobby after service. Enjoy! What is up Journey Church Online? I am so excited to be in the house of the Lord today but most importantly I'm excited that you made it here. If I haven't gotten the privilege of meeting you yet my name is Chantel and I get the honor to serve the Lord on this happy Sunday. So as you guys can tell I got gloves on okay and yeah we're in Orlando Florida but it's 22 degrees today so I had to bring the gloves. But one thing I want to talk about whether it's cold, whether it's hot, whether it rains, whether it shines the Lord is so good. So go ahead and drop in the chat some brick emojis because it's brick outside but most importantly some prayer hands because God is so good. So we are excited we are in the stage we are in the auditorium where everybody's getting prepared for the Word of God today and we have a new series like the other ladies have

mentioned love, sex, and marriage or in between you know that's what Pastor JJ So get excited for the Word and go ahead and write what are you expecting to get what are you looking out from this series and what are you waiting for God to confirm. Go ahead and write it in the chat so that your fellow online crew or people who are just watching in for the first time because it's too cold to go in person today have also in common with what you have in common. Another thing that I want to talk to you guys about today is that the Lord put something on my heart that I want to share with you Proverbs 18 10 it says God's name is a place of protection and people can run there and be safe so whatever you might be going through right now God will protect you through it all so let's pray and let's get our hearts prepared for worship. Father God thank you so much for allowing us to be in the house of the Lord today for this new series for this new word and prepare us to be able to hear you to be able to see you God and be able to receive we're so grateful for all that you do God in Jesus name we pray amen so let's worship together and I'll see you soon bye-bye Welcome home Journey Church! Come on who's ready to praise this morning? We thank you for freedom We thank you for freedom I'm dancing out the heaviness I'm dancing out of my regrets I'm throwing caution to the wind No I am not ashamed to praise like this Some would say it's foolishness But I say it's worth the risk See I can't forget what Jesus did No I am not ashamed to praise like this Where are those chains that once held me? I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free My sin is gone how can it be? I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free

I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free Look at what the Lord has done I'm never going back to the way I was I'll sing, I'll dance cause I believe I'm free, I'm free, thank God I'm free Come on we thank you today Jesus I found a friend that never quit No other love's as good as this And I don't care what anyone says I'll never be ashamed to praise like this Where are those chains that once held me? I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free My sin is gone how can it be? I'm free, I'm free, thank God I'm free I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free Look at what the Lord has done I'm never going back to the way I was I'll sing, I'll dance cause I believe I'm free, I'm free, thank God I'm free You took the cross and you broke your body You shed your blood now the sinner can't sing My debt is paid and my record is clean You took the cross and you broke your body You shed your blood now the sinner can't sing My debt is paid and my record is clean I couldn't do it You took the cross You shed your blood My debt is paid My debt is paid

I couldn't do it I couldn't do it I couldn't do it I couldn't do it I couldn't do it ♪ Can we do it so You can do it for us so we can foil them all? ♪ ♪ Where are those chains that once held? ♪ Come on, we sing I'm free! ♪ I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free ♪ ♪ My sin is gone, how can I be? ♪ ♪ I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, oh oh oh oh oh ♪ ♪ Because it was the heart that said so, I'm never going back to the way I was ♪ ♪ I sing, I'll dance, cause I believe ♪ ♪ I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free, I'm free ♪ ♪ You took the cross and you broke your body, You shed your blood now the sinner can't see, My debt is paid and my record is clean, I couldn't do it so you did it for me, You took the cross and you broke your body, You shed your blood now the sinner can't see, My debt is paid and my record is clean ♪ ♪ You took the cross and you broke your body, You shed your blood now the sinner can't see, My debt is paid and my record is clean, I couldn't do it so you did it for me, You took the cross and you broke your body, You shed your blood now the sinner can't see, My debt is paid and my record, I couldn't do it so you did it for me, You took the cross and you broke your body, You shed your blood now the sinner can't see, My debt is paid and my record, I couldn't do it so you did it for me, I couldn't do it so you did it for me, I couldn't do it so you did it for me, I couldn't do it so you did it for me, I couldn't do it so you did it for me, I couldn't do it so you did it for me, I couldn't do it so you did it for me I couldn't do it so you did it for me, I couldn't do it so you did it for me, I couldn't do it so you did it for me, I couldn't do it so you did it for me Look at what the Lord has done, I'm never going back to the way I was And look at what the Lord has done, I'm never going back to the way I was And look at what the Lord has done, I'm never going back to the way I was Oh we're not going back, we're never going back Lord Come on how many are thankful that we're never going back to how it was We're moving forward, he's guiding our way God we thank you, cause we are never the same in your presence God we put you first right now in this place You've taken us, but we thank you for every story of life change that's in this room Cause you called us out, but we sing this out When I was lost and all alone, your presence was where I found home You were there and you're here right now In every high, in every high and every low

You never left me without hope You were good and you're good right now Come on we sing I've witnessed your faithfulness I've seen you bring life with you So I'll pour out my praise again You're worthy, God you're worthy of all of it Your promise is never failing I've got stories I live to tell So I'll pour out my praise again You're worthy, God you're worthy of all of it You left the throne and chose the cross You laid down your life to rescue us To save you then, to save you now Believe in death was not the end You conquered hell so I can live Resurrecting then, resurrecting now Come on we sing this out Resurrecting then, resurrecting now I've witnessed your faithfulness I've seen you bring life with you So I'll pour out my praise again You're worthy, God you're worthy of all of it Your promise is never failing I've got stories I live to tell So I'll pour out my praise again ♪ Call my praise again, you're worthy ♪ ♪ God, you're worthy of all of this ♪ ♪ Yes, you are God, call my praise ♪ ♪ I will pour it out ♪

Come on, could you pour out praises to Him this morning and declare that He's good? Come on, we sing. ♪ You're good and I will be still ♪ ♪ You're strong and I witnessed it ♪ ♪ You're constant and I witnessed it and I'm confident ♪ ♪ I see it again and again ♪ ♪ You love and I witnessed it ♪ ♪ You heal and I witnessed it ♪ ♪ You save and I witnessed it and I'm confident ♪ ♪ I'll see it again and again ♪ ♪ You're good and I witnessed it, it's who you are ♪ ♪ You're strong and I witnessed it ♪ ♪ You're constant and I witnessed it and I'm confident ♪ ♪ I'll see it again and again ♪ ♪ You love and I witnessed it ♪ ♪ You heal and I witnessed it ♪ ♪ You save and I witnessed it and I'm confident ♪ ♪ I'll see it again and again ♪ ♪ I witnessed your faithfulness ♪ ♪ I've seen you with life within ♪ ♪ So I'll pour out my praise again ♪ ♪ You're worthy, God you're worthy of all of it ♪ ♪ Your promise is never broken ♪ ♪ I've got stories I live to tell ♪ ♪ So I'll pour out my praise again ♪ ♪ You're worthy, God you're worthy of all of it ♪ ♪ To the broken I witnessed it ♪ ♪ To the hurting I witnessed it ♪ ♪ To the lost I will witness it and I'm telling this ♪

♪ I'll tell them what I witnessed to my family I witnessed it ♪ ♪ To my city I witnessed it to the nations I witnessed it ♪ ♪ And I'm telling this I'll tell them what I witnessed ♪ ♪ Cause you are a good God I will tell them ♪ ♪ And I'm telling this I will tell them what I witnessed ♪ ♪ And I will tell them what I witnessed to my family I witnessed it ♪ ♪ And I'm telling this I'll tell them what I witnessed to my family ♪ ♪ Cause you are a good God I will tell them what I witnessed it ♪ And that's how I tell you. But you're right here with us. We're super excited. We want to shout out all of our Pando App viewers. We love you. We see you guys. And we know that God has something great for you today. Absolutely. And we want to give a special shout out to a very special group, our first time guests. So, if you are new here, go ahead and drop FTG in the comments. Scan the QR code get plugged in, get connected. We'd love to get to know you Absolutely. And first time guests, we want to get to know you and we want to get to know what gifts and unique talents that you have. And if you don't know what those are, we'll help you. You can do that by scanning the QR code at the bottom of your screen.

And next step is a place where you will get to understand Journey's vision, what Pastor JJ and Pastor Liz have been working towards here in this house and how you fit in. Everyone has unique gifts and talents and there is a place for them here. And next step is a place where you can get plugged in and find that place and find community at the same time. Right. It's actually how Melanie and I got here. So, it's definitely amazing. And another exciting thing happened. So, last Sunday, we finally opened up our small groups again for the spring semester. Small groups is just a place where, in such a big church, we have the blessing of being a part of a really big church. But of course, you want to find your community, people with your same interests that you can actually do life with. And it was a blessing for me last year. Last year, I struggled to find community and just felt like I was outgrowing old relationships and they no longer reflected this walk that I'm on with the Lord. And small groups really helped me to find my people. So I encourage you to scan the QR code. We have everything. You'll be so surprised at all the different groups that you will be able to find and connect with. Exactly, so get plugged in, get connected,

find your people. Find your people, absolutely. And speaking of people, one of our own, Raven, I have an amazing testimony that I want to share with you today. She, although she attended church in 2004, she heard a message from Pastor JJ that stirred her heart. It really got her thinking about life and where she was at. She was in a season of really a lot of desperation and loneliness, but that message really touched her heart and touched her spirit. And it was the day that she decided to surrender and give God her yes. And what God did, he showed up. He showed up in her loneliness. He showed up in her weakness. And now today, Raven, she's one of our own serving on the online team. She's leading small groups and she joined Journey College. So she's a student now. Amazing transformation, amazing change. And that's what happens when you get plugged in and you find your community and you really say and surrender and you give your yes to God. And if you want to be a part of that, you can. And you can do that by scanning the QR code at the bottom of the screen and be a part of what God is doing here at Journey Church. We love you, Raven. You know, Pastor JJ always says,

especially to our first time guests, to give Jesus one year of your life. So it's so beautiful to hear that she took full advantage of that opportunity and gave Jesus her yes. And now she's serving in so many amazing areas at the church and just strengthening her own faith and leading others as well and shepherding the flock. So we love you, Raven. Well, listen, let's get ready for another time of worship, some prayer. We're gonna go ahead and send it over to Chantel. Chantel is going to give you a nice little pre-word before you get the actual whole plate. So we'll see you here soon. Enjoy service. Good morning. Welcome back, Journey Church Online. And as you guys all know, it is Pray First Sunday. And at our church, we do highly believe that praying first should be our first resort, never our last. So in this moment, we're going to come into together with corporate prayer as we pray over some of the requests from some of our online, some of our Kissimmee campus, some of our East campus, some of our Farnham Park campus, and even for some of the people that are in here today that are getting prayed over. If you feel comfortable, go ahead and pray with me. So Father God, thank you so much for even allowing us to get another breath today, God,

to breathing back into our lungs so that we can wake up because you still have a plan for us. God, before I pray over these requests, Father God, I ask you to help me decrease as you increase, Lord. Let it be your voice to speak over your people. Let your children be able to hear you through my voice, Father God. Thank you, Jesus, for putting us in this position to be able to pray together, but most importantly, be able to be in your presence and dwell right here. We're coming to you, and we just wanna give you all the glory right now because gratitude is one of the biggest gifts that we could possibly have. Thank you for allowing us to be able to call on your name, to run to you for asking for protection, for asking for peace. And as we all come together right now, Jesus, as your sons and as your daughters, Father God, I just ask you to continue to be with us as we pray. Father God, we are praying today for healing. We're asking for supernatural healing as some of the people that are online are currently dealing with some diagnosis that they might not be able to understand, Father God. The diagnosis might not be exactly what they envisioned it, Lord, but everything that you do is pre-calculated, God, and that you already have at the outcome, God. Allow them to have peace in the chaos of not knowing what is to come next, God.

Allow them to, even though this diagnosis says it's going to be negative, Lord, I'm asking you to take the negative and turn it into a positive, Father God, because you are a father that turns bad into good. And even if they don't know, what's going to happen from the outcome. God, I ask right now to give them the strength to know that you will get all the glory from this situation, Father God. We're coming together today, and we're also praying for families, Lord, that might not have you at the center, Father God. We're asking for those families right now in the name of Jesus to be able to hear your voice, to hear your presence, to feel your presence, and to encounter you right now in the name of Jesus so that they can start living for you, God, so that they can start living for you and be able to proclaim your name to others and to be able to show that you are now in life, in their lives, Lord, and that they are now able to move the way that you want them to move and to say the things that you want them to say and to be a testimony, to be an example for the other people watching them, Father God. Allow them to encounter you, Father God, so that they know that you are in control and that without you, there is nothing.

Without you, God, there is nothing. And we just ask you right now in the name of Jesus to protect these families so that when they hear you and when they see you and when they're adoring you, Lord, they know that it's you, Father God, and that their answers have been prayed, that they've been answered, Lord. Lord, we're coming together today for the someone on this live stream that is looking for their partner, Lord, looking for their spouse, looking for the person that they're going to do life with, Father God. We're just asking you right now to give that person a piece of clarity and understanding that you are perfect in timing. And when the time is right, that person will come and they won't have to doubt, they won't have to question, they won't have to worry because you have ordained the relationship that is meant to be in their life, Father God. Allow this person to know that you have a hand in all of it, Lord, that your hand is better than any hand and your way is better than any way, and that you are going to bring and to deliver the person that they are looking for. In Jesus' name, we believe it to be so.

God, we are coming together and we are praying for financial circumstances, Lord, praying for provision over the families that might not be able to pay a bill right now, that might not be able to pay rent right now, that are looking and wondering how is the bank account going to turn into another situation. But God, we know that you can show up right at the end, right at the buzzer, Father God. And I'm just asking you right now for these families and for these people and for your daughters and for your sons that are going through a financial struggle right now to endure, to have an angel come right down right now to change the situation, because you are a God that changes the situation. You are a God that makes them believe that you are the only one that can get them out of the situation that they are currently in, Father God. We believe that you're able to do it all, Lord, because you made the sun, you made the moon, you made the stars, you made the ocean. And Lord, you can create a new situation and a new profound way of them to think and change their perspective in the name of Jesus. Lord, we are praying for the spirit of depression to be broken. We're praying for the spirit of addiction to be broken.

We are praying for the person that just needs a sign today, Lord. And let this sign be the sign that they've been waiting for, Lord, to encounter them wherever they are, whether they're in their gym, whether they're in their bed, whether they're right now in the room, whether they are crying watching this live stream, Lord, let them know that that is your presence. Let them know that they hear you, Lord. Let them know that you are right in the midst of it all, Father God. Lord, we are coming and praying for their children, kids that don't know you yet, but will know you, Lord. We are decreeing and declare that the kids will know your name. They will call on you, Jesus, and that way will be the ones to be able to bring the generations, to break generational curses, to get them families to a new way and to a new way of how they live their life. Father God, we are thankful for all that you're doing in our lives, God. Thank you for being able to answer our prayers immediately, God, because you are that good of a God, that you don't let us be in the bad and the storm for too long,

but even when we are going through it, God, that you allow us to look up at you and to be able to know that you will bring us and deliver us through it. Lord, I know that deliverance is coming from this live stream today, that your word is going to set somebody free today, God, and that there will be freedom at the end of this live stream, Father God, because you are the definition of freedom. Thank you, Jesus, for all that you do. We decree and declare that all these things will be so in Jesus' mighty, matchless name. We pray that all of these things will happen. Thank you, Jesus. And with that same hot posture, we are going to go back into a word of God today, and I hope you guys come expecting for the word to hit your heart today. Thank you. Come on, make some noise if you love Jesus this morning. Father, we love you. Ain't nobody like you, Laura. We thank you. And every time I come up here right before I preach, I'm always... Down in the corner and I say a prayer and it's always the same prayer every time and my first prayer is always this It's I pray for a Holy Spirit flow For your glory and the reason why I pray that is because I don't care how long you do this it's always nerve-wracking preaching to thousands of people and

What helps me is? Reminding myself that it isn't about me And the more I put my attention on God for your glory For your name not my name for your fame not my fame For you to worship you not to worship me the more I get my eyes focused on him the less I'm focused on me And the less I'm focused on me the more peace I have the more joy I have the more hope I have I just come to tell you today. Listen, the best thing you can do this morning is get your eyes off you I know you think you came to church for you. I know you think you came to church for your relationship I think you came to church for this is why you came to church I promise you for his glory because the more you live for him the less life can affect you So if you are able to this morning, I want to invite you to stretch your hands towards heaven and just tell the Lord It's about you Lord God made my life exalt your name I want to live for your glory Lord God and as I live for your glory Your joy fills my heart as I live for your glory Your peace calms my soul as I live for your glory Your strength fills in for my weakness as I live for your glory your presence overwhelms my anxiety As I live for your glory your answers outweigh my questions as I live for your glory your salvation Reminds me Lord that I'm blessed as I live for your glory your presence for you for you for you Yes, Jesus Thank you Lord Thank you Jesus Well, let's get our eyes on him this morning Oh Come on if you love the Lord Jesus, will you give him a hand clap of praise today as we exalt him make his name famous Love on him today Amen Well before we take a seat and continue on with our service Would you find three people you did not drive to church with today?

Give him a high five and tell him stay warm. Stay warm Stay warm Amen, amen, who's excited to be in the house of God today? Oh Awesome Wow, I was not expecting this many people to be at church today Cuz it's cold, but y'all don't care. I Love it. Let's go Jesus keep me warm. I think I heard somebody say amen And what if we haven't had the opportunity to me yet? My name is JJ and alongside my wife Liz We have the honor and the privilege of serving journey church as its lead pastors And if you didn't know that that means you are a first-time guest and we're so glad that you chose to be with us Today in this cold February you are looking if you're looking for a home church We think you found it because you are surrounded by some of the most amazing Honest open transparent people in all of Central, Florida. You're surrounded by the Spirit of God journey church Come on, put your hands together. Help me. Welcome all of our first-time guests and keep it going for journey church online What's up journey church online? You know, we got a lot of people watching online today keep it going for journey East Orlando meeting at University High School What's up, East Orlando and keep it going for journey Kissimmee Meeting a gateway high school. What's up? Finally, let's all keep it going for those who are currently incarcerated Watching in jails and prisons throughout the United States Through the panda web. We love y'all today quick shout out to all of our campuses It's in Kissimmee East Orlando If you ever look at Fern Park on the screen and you're like, oh man, I wish I was there I wish that I was not today Not today. You don't because our heater went down at 3 a.m Yesterday and we have been working hard to get it warm in this building and it's just a big building And so it takes a long time And so thank you for in part for being gracious and being patient and if it's cool

this next Sunday, I promise it will be warmer than it is today. But for now, just stay close to somebody, somebody warm. Exhale, you know. You're not supposed to preach with your hands in your pockets, but I'm gonna be doing a lot of that today, just trying to stay warm, man. Well, that being said, I'm really excited about this whole month. February 20th, we are bringing back our marriage night. Come on, someone. If you're married, marriage night is gonna be a lot of fun. We're gonna have some teaching, we're gonna have some live Q&A. You can bring your questions. On top of that, we're gonna have some fun games. There's gonna be some snacks. You're really gonna enjoy it. If you came last year, you know how fun it was. So you can come to this if you are married or if you are engaged with a date on the calendar.

Date on the calendar being key because some of y'all have been engaged for a long time. And at this point, I don't know if it's ever happening, and so you might not be able to come to this, okay? So if you know what's happening, then we want you here because it's gonna be really good. And then also, the reason why we're talking about relationship stuff is because today, we kick off our Love, Sex, and Marriage series. Yeah. Really pumped about it. We've been doing this series now for nine years, and it is one of my most things I look most forward to in the year calendar because I know how many people really need this. And I've been praying for you. I've been thinking about you. And you wanna come every Sunday this month or watch online if you can't make it because every week, we're gonna be trying to help you in one of the most

painful areas of your life, which we know it can be relationships. And back by popular demand, at the end of this sermon, I'm gonna go record a podcast, something called The After Talk, which we're gonna be doing. Pastor Liz and I will both be here. We'll be answering your questions, and we'll just be diving deeper into the message. And so if you wanna dive deeper into today's message, then you can do that by downloading the Journey Church app and joining us on The After Talk, which should go live probably on Monday or something like that. So it'll be good. All right, well, let's get into the message. You guys ready to hear a word from God? I'm ready to preach it. If this is your first Love, Sex, and Marriage series with us, then you will not be familiar with our tradition, but we have

a little tradition here when we kick off this series, and that is that we start every series, every sermon, with love letters from kids. Love letters from kids. Yeah, I think love letters from kids are hilarious because I think that love is a very complicated, complex thing, or at least it can be. And I think it's funny to see that process through the lens of a six-year-old just trying to gather and understand it. And so the monitor here, I think it's out, but... So yeah, so I wanna show you some. Number one, we have this letter. I always tell young people, whether you're 10, 11, 12, 8, 9, 14, I'm like, you shouldn't really be looking for someone to date at that age. And the answer is really simple because you don't have a car. And so much of your schedule and your life is out of your control when you're a child or a teenager.

So just wait. Just wait till you get older. Wait till you can actually go on a date and not have your mom drive you. Like, it's gonna make a difference. For example, like, look at this first letter right here. So much of this person's relationship is out of their control. Here's how this letter starts. Are you off punishment yet? And if not, when are you getting off? When are you gonna come over? When are we gonna go to the movies? Can I have my CD player back? Some of you don't even know what a CD player is. And when you come over, you will get your CD. And I love you. But until then, your CD is held hostage. So you get over it. Get your mom. Tell her to come over here.

All right? Second one shows you how selfish we can be in relationships, even as children. Look at this letter. Dear Kim, hi. I'm fine. And you? I'm sorry I didn't write so soon. I'm having fun here and have many friends. I hate writing to people. I just like getting letters from them. Happy Valentine's Day. Love, Jalop. P.S. Please write back. Because I don't like giving. I just like getting. Narcissist. Here's the next one that shows you just how complicated relationships are, even at a young age. So complicated. December 5th, dear Mike, hey, cutie. How are you? I'm okay.

I don't know what Steph said to you, but I'm sure I'll find out. Brian probably already told you there's already too many people in this relationship. You got Brian. You got Steph. There's too many people. Brian probably already told you this, but yes, I will go out with you. Hold up. But I don't want to go out with you right now, because then I won't get to dance with anyone else besides you at the dance. It gets better, and neither will you. Never mind, I'll let you dance with other people. I hope you understand. So I think it would be better if you just asked me out either at the end of the dance or the end of next week. That sounds stupid and concited. I think she meant conceited, but it's too many things complicated. And this last letter, this last letter is actually not as funny as it is sad. I cringe when I read it because they don't know what's coming. And so, dear Bae, dear Bae, tomorrow is one week. One week they've been dating. One week, and I can't believe it.

I'm so glad I met you. I would never have anyone as perfect as you. You're the sweetest person I've ever met. This week, it's been one week. I cannot wait till this weekend, because if this week's been good, I can't imagine this weekend. This weekend's going to blow up. It's going to be amazing to hang out with you. You're the best thing that has ever happened to me this week. Love, love. They've been dating one week, and they're already throwing out the L word. Love, your Bae. Love. And what breaks my heart about this letter is, though, I will probably never meet the person who wrote it, I can almost guarantee you this relationship did not last. But in the moment, it's so bright. It's so passionate, and that is the irony of love, right? It has this power to be passionate and painful. It has this power to be beautiful and a burden at the same time. And I think it's at this point that we can all relate. Because if I were to ask you your relationship status here today, it would be varied. We've got people in their 20s who are single. We've got people in their 50s who are single. We've got people who are married. We've got people who are engaged. We've got people who are divorced, and unfortunately, we

have some people in the room who are widowed. But where we could all relate is to that point right there, the pain and the passion of love. All of us have been hurt at some point in some season. All of us have been excited and hopeful at some point, some season. All of us have been disappointed in some season. And I'm really hoping, here's what I believe, that in this series, we're going to be helping everybody. Here's what's going to happen. You're going to get tools every week this month that are either going to help you navigate your present relationship, heal from your past relationship, or prepare you for your future relationship. That's what we believe, no matter where you are. So to do that, we're going to open up a book, open up our Bible to a book that I have never preached out of to teach relationships before. Nine years in, I've used a lot of religion. First Corinthians 13, I'm all over that. I already used that. If you know your Bible, the love chapter, I've preached that a bunch of times. But I've never preached this passage of Scripture to talk about relationships. We're going to be reading from the book of Jonah. Now, if you are unfamiliar with Jonah, Jonah was a prophet of the Lord, a messenger of God. And God told Jonah to go preach to the people who lived in Nineveh, called the Ninevites.

Jonah didn't want to do that. So he got on a boat, and instead of going to Nineveh, went to the city of Tarshish. Now, if you don't know the Bible maps, just know this. Tarshish was in the complete opposite direction of Nineveh. So he didn't just say no to the Lord. He said, heck no. He's like, definitely not. Went the opposite direction. But on his way, running away from Nineveh, the Bible says that God caught up to Jonah and sent a storm that started rocking the boat. How many people know that God will catch up? God always catches up. I don't care how fast you were in high school. You ain't that fast. Bible says, where can I run from your presence? Where can I flee from you? If I'm going to go to heaven, you're there. If I go to hell, you're there. Everywhere I go, you're there. There's no escaping you. And so he catches up. And this is the part of the story that we jump in on when the storm hits the ship. Jonah 1, verse 4 through 5. Then the Lord sent a great wind on the sea, and such a violent storm arose that the ship threatened to break up. And all the sailors were afraid,

and each cried out to his own God. How many people know nothing will have you calling out to God like a potential breakup? When things are getting rocky, when things are on the edge, that's when we come to church, when people start throwing out the divorce word and we need God. They start calling out. Verse 5, and they threw the cargo into the sea to lighten the ship. This is a very important detail that we're going to talk about. Come back to later in the sermon. So just commit it to memory because we've got to remember that Verse 11 and the sea was getting rougher and rougher. So they asked jonah. What should we do to you to make the sea? Calm down for us Verse 12 jonah said pick me up and throw me into the sea He replied and it will become calm For I know That it is my fault I'm gonna say that part again For I know that it is my fault That this great storm has come upon you. I want to speak to you today on the title of our sermon in our series today It's not you It's me We usually get a lot of claps for the sermon titles Not today It's not you It's me. I want to speak to you today On what could be the number one blocker that is keeping you from

From being the in the best relationship that you can be What could be the number one hurdle that is hindering you from enjoying the journey with that person? well, what could be the number one obstacle or opportunity That if you were to change it could change everything about your relationship and your relationship Status and I think that that number one thing could be You Now I know that that's not uh Super encouraging to hear but I promise it it does get it does get better Um, I know this might seem like a weird bible verse to start talking about Uh relationships, but but I mean after all the word is called relationships Isn't it? And I do think that there is something significant about the fact that ship Is is found in the word we all heard that phrase before don't rock the boat Everybody could be in the right position on a boat. Everybody could be seated in the right seat on the boat But if you are up and down and up and down and up and down and up and down How many people know even if they're in the right place we're all having a terrible experience As I was studying ships As one often does In preparation for this sermon I learned something about shipping containers And shipping ships here. You see how many people have seen boats like this with the red bottom Yeah, these are these are not Christian Louboutins, okay, these are not This isn't a fascist statement here. This the red bottoms No, the reason why shipping boats have this red bottom is because of this white line right here This white line is called a plimsoll line a plimsoll line And this boat is legally allowed to carry as many packages as possible But when a new container gets on the boat The boat goes a little more down because of the weight a little more down a little more down If this boat if the water reaches the white line that boat is not legally allowed to leave harbor because it's not

Safe because it's too low And if the wave hits if a storm hits while the ship is below its plimsoll line Then the ship will capsize because it's not high enough to survive the storm This makes sense now why the people were throwing cargo Out of jonah's ship when the storm was hitting because they were trying to get the boat above the plimsoll line Because they knew that the boat could survive the storm, but if it was too low in the water This is why they were throwing out cargo because they were trying to lighten the ship But the heaviest thing on that ship was not the captain's cargo. The heaviest thing on that ship was jonah's conscience The heaviest thing on that ship was jonah's shame The heaviest thing on that ship was jonah's issues and until they got him off the ship That ship was going down because how many people know some ships don't fail because of the waves on the outside But because of the weight on the inside You don't understand this ships were designed to survive storms Ships were literally designed to withstand waves When my wife and I lost our son You want to talk about a storm you want to talk about a wave? But do you know what got us through that storm number one our relationship with jesus? Number two our relationships with people who prayed for us That intercession was powerful and number three our relationship with each other If we did not have relationships, we would have sun It was the relationships that kept us afloat now listen. It wasn't the pregnancy that almost destroyed our marriage It was my porn addiction It wasn't the wave on the outside that almost took us down. Are you tracking it was the weight on the inside? Waves don't always capsize ships, but what a wave will always do is it will always expose the ship The wave will always reveal the weight that you are carrying that you didn't even know you were carrying It'll always do it. It's when the wave hits the relationship that you start to realize. I have some unprocessed trauma It isn't until the wave hits the ship that you realize I might have some unrealistic Expectations it isn't so the wave hits that we start considering sharing like in Jonah's condition that hidden sin It always happens It always happens, and it's and it's something that we have to look at ourselves see see this goes contrary

To because the best way to save the ship listen is to lighten the load and the only way to lighten the load Is to get rid of your luggage first? Get rid of your luggage first the thing that you're carrying now this flies in the face of modern relationship advice Because we live in a culture where if you don't like it you switch it If you don't like it you change it, but if you get in the next relationship with a different person in the same you We're back at square one It's you gotta understand sometimes it's user error You know what I mean? One time for Liz's baby moon. We can't remember what kid it was but for one of our kids We went to Miami for a baby moon, and we rented a boat And we wanted to go out into the harbor a little tiny boat And and and when we got there the guy was like he asked me He was like do you know how to drive a boat? I was like absolutely never rode a boat in my life But I'm thinking how hard can it be anything that doesn't require a license I? Got it. I Can figure it out you don't need a license to ride a bike you don't need a license to go rollerblades And I could do all that I got the boat I Did not have it The moment we got out I crashed into the boat next to me Then I backed up into the harbor and now the dude is looking at me like you don't got this You said you knew how to drive a boat and everything inside of me wanted to point to something else Everything inside of me wanted to be like you know what happened I? Learned to drive boats in Europe Hey Europe we drive on a side at the ocean and This is this is a this is a 1990 model. I learned on the 80 I learned on the 80 mile But I couldn't I couldn't because I just look to do not my bad I'm the problem It's me, and I know what you're thinking you're thinking, but you don't know my husband

You don't know my girlfriend. You never met my ex-pastor JJ. I promise you It's them Don't amen that I promise you And and you're right I have never met them, but but I'm gonna assume something about them that I'm probably is true even though I've never met them. They're probably not perfect and If they're not perfect. I hope they're here I Hope they're here because I would tell them the same thing I'm telling you and what I'm telling you is the only person you can change in a relationship It's you That's how I tell him it's you It's user error, and it's the only thing you can fix you got to look at yourself first Did you know the 70% of plane crashes happen because of user error? You know the most of the time medicine doesn't work. It's because you didn't read the prescription It said two pills twice a day not one pill every three days Ask any tech support specialists what the number one problem the reason why the electronic is not working And they will all tell you nine out of ten times. It's not plugged in It's me I got I gotta work on me And you need to accept this before we can move any forward because the moment I even said the title it's not you It's me you elbowed your partner You were like aren't you glad you came today? He's talking to you this message is for you, and I'm like you must have misread the title The title is it's not you it's he And it's not it's not you it's she the title is it's not you it's me Because when Jesus wants to fix a relationship his approach isn't doesn't begin with the other person Did you know that look at Jesus's process of fixing relationships Matthew chapter 7 verse 3? Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye? And pay no attention to the plank in your own eye. How can you say to your brother,

let me take the speck out of your eye, when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? Here's what Jesus is saying. If you really want to get your relationship on track, if you want to change your relationship status, if you really want to do everything you can to have the best marriage that you can have today or tomorrow, here's the first thing you got to do. You got to take responsibility for me. Take responsibility for me. I'm a pastor and I speak to a lot of people who go through things, and I speak to a lot of divorcees. And 9 out of 10 times when I ask the divorcee, hey, so what happened? Why did you get divorced? No judgment. 9 out of 10 times, 1 out of 10 I'll get a different answer, but 9 out of 10 times, here's what the answer is. It's them, pastor. They're crazy. It's them. They're lazy. It's them. They don't know how to talk. It's them. They're selfish.

It's them. They're a narcissist. I've never heard the word narcissist so much in my life than in 2025 and 2024. Narcissist was the word of the year, which is wild, because I've never met a narcissist. I've never met anybody come up to me and be like, hi, I'm Jim. I'm a narcissist. I never met a narcissist. Only met people who date them. But I never met one. I never met one. And you know what no one ever tells me? Why did you get the divorce? It was me, pastor. I was emotionally immature. I was a flirt. I had trauma that I didn't know that I had, and it came out in the other way. I didn't know how to treat her. It was me. I was the one who couldn't keep it in the pants. It was me. I had the attitude. It was me. I didn't serve. It was me.

And here's what I want to make you clear. This is not about taking the blame. I don't want you to take the blame. This is not about blame at all, because if you take the blame, you take the shame. And I don't want any shame on you. This is not what this is. This is not about taking the shame. This is about taking the responsibility. And there's a difference. Why? Because when you take the responsibility, listen, you take back the power. And I want to empower you this morning. I want you to take responsibility because you take back the power when you take the responsibility. A lot of people don't know this. I'm going to tell you a story that, behind the scenes, BTS, right? Two years ago, when we launched, or three years ago, when we launched our East Orlando campus, shout out East Orlando, when we launched our East Orlando campus, we had two practice services before launch day. And the reason why we do that is to make sure that all the technical stuff works out. And we had no problem during any of the practice services.

And on launch day for East Orlando, three minutes before worship is over and it kicks to us here at Fern Park where we preach live, the signal goes out. Our campus pastor is about to introduce me and has a three-minute heads-up that they're going to have to preach that day, on launch day. 700 people in the room on launch day. And so that's crazy. So on Monday, I get all the staff together, and I go, guys, what happened? And I'm like, I want answers, and we gotta fix this. And they got real defensive at first. And I had to just clarify, I go, oh, no, no, you think this is about blame. I'm not trying to blame anybody. This ain't about shame. This is about taking responsibility so that it doesn't happen again. What happened? Well, when they figured out what happened, the primary encoder went down, all right? I don't know what that is. But what can we do so that doesn't happen again? They said, well, I think we need a backup encoder. I said, that's a great plan. Let's take responsibility, get a backup encoder. Fast forward, last Sunday, Kissimmee launches. Shout out, Kissimmee.

Kissimmee launches. Great experience. Everyone loved it. We had 1,293 people at launch day. Shout out. You don't know, but right before we were going to kick it, the encoder went down. But you know why you didn't know, Kissimmee? Because we had a backup. We had a backup. And because we took responsibility, we were able to ensure it didn't happen again. I don't know what happened to you in the last relationship, but if you don't take a little bit of responsibility, I can tell you what's going to happen in the next one. But it's them, Pastor J. They're crazy. You don't know. Okay, they're crazy. But there's 8.3 billion people in the world, and you picked them. Can you at least take responsibility? Can you at least take responsibility? responsibility for picking them or all the people you picked the crazy one? Because if you don't take responsibility, you're gonna pick another one that's gonna be the same one as the last one if

you don't take responsibility. You gotta take it. If you're widowed in here, it's not your fault that your spouse died. That's crazy. This isn't about blame, but what you can do, listen, is begin to take the responsibility for your healing. And you go, I am grieving, but I'm gonna get in the Word. I'm gonna get in therapy. I'm gonna get so that I don't have to grieve forever. I'm gonna take responsibility of my emotions. If you're single, let's not blame someone else for being single. I'm not blaming you for being single, but while you're single, can you take responsibility for your growth, for your own development? How about taking responsibility for your joy and your happiness and not blaming your unhappiness on being single? Take responsibility for that.

If you're married, can we start taking responsibility, stop blaming the other person for everything that's wrong with them, and start taking just a little bit of responsibility for everything that's wrong with us? Because you know there's some things wrong with us, right? You are, right? This was Jesus' next step, Matthew 7, 5. Look what he says. You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly and remove the speck from your brother's eye. Do you know what the word hypocrite means, literally, in the Greek? It's a term that was pulled from Greek theater. It literally translates into actor. It literally means actor. So, when you saw two people in a play in the Greek theater, that was the hypocrite, and that was the hypocrite.

You know what God is saying to you? He's going, how you gonna get on them? Look what he says. This is my next point. Stop acting like me is perfect. You know you ain't perfect, right? Are you acting like you are? Because your attitude is indicating that you think you got it. I don't think you do. Every once in a while, a pastor doesn't come up to me. I hate when she asks me this, and she'll go, did you brush your teeth? I'm like, excuse me? She'll be like, no, I'm just saying, like, did you brush your teeth? I'm like, say that again? What? Why are you asking me if I brush my teeth? No, it's just, you know. It's kind of smells a little bad, you know?

I'm just like, what? Are you kidding me? Here's what she's really saying, because I don't know if there's a dentist in here or a dental hygienist. You can correct me if I'm wrong, but I brush my teeth, and I floss every night. Every night, I brush my teeth good. I got the electric one. I'm in there two minutes. I floss all the gums. Every night, I go to bed, and when I wake up, there's no food in my teeth, so I take the Listerine, and I go to town on the Listerine. That's my process in the morning. Don't judge me. If you're in a dentist, if you're in a hygienist, I want to hear it. If you are, DM me, but you can help us out here, but in my mind, the food is gone, so I just need to get rid of the bad breath, so I Listerine, and then she'll be

like, but the thing that bothers me is she asked me the question at 1 p.m. I'm like, well, my 1 p.m. breath has no bearing on my 8 a.m. habits. It's just 1 p.m. I could be wrong. I don't know. But the truth is that even if my breath did smell, I wouldn't be able to know because of a scientific process called olfactory adaption, and what that means is your nose actually becomes so used to the smell molecules around you because you've been in it for so long, you literally cannot smell it. That's why you could be in the bathroom for 30 minutes reading a book, scrolling social media, just chilling, and then you leave, and someone else comes in and... What happened? Like, what happened? You're olfactory adapted. This is why all you weed smokers swear like we can't smell you.

You swear like we can't smell you, bro. The Axe Body Spray ain't doing it. We smell you. But you can't smell you. Journey Church, I love you. I love you. I need to preface what I'm about to say. With that, I care about you. You're in additional seating, I love you. Kissimmee, I love you. East Atlanta, I love you. Journey Church, we love you. We pray for you. We pray for you all the time. And you stink. So do I. As a matter of fact, would you do me a favor, just tell your neighbor, say, neighbor, forgive me for my smell. Because you don't know it. But you got it. And listen, before you email me and get mad at me, it's not low self-esteem. It's actually a biblical virtue called humility. To understand that you do not smell as good

as you think you smell. To enter into the relationship recognizing, I got some things going on with me. Because if you don't, you will treat people different because you forgot who you are. Matthew chapter 18, verse 23 and 25, Jesus tells a story. He says, the kingdom of God is like a king who decided to square accounts with his servants. And as he got underway, one servant was brought before him who had run up a debt of $100,000. Wow. And he couldn't pay it. So the king ordered the man, along with his wife and children and goods, to be auctioned off at the slave market. But the poor wretch threw himself at the king's feet and begged, give me a chance and I'll pay it all back. Touched by his plea, the king let him off, erasing the debt. Verse 28, but the servant was no sooner out of the room when he came across one of his fellow servants who owed him $10. And he seized him by the throat and demanded, pay up now. Verse 29, the poor wretch threw himself down and begged, give me a chance and I'll pay it all back. The same prayer that he prayed a couple minutes ago. But this man wouldn't do it. He had him arrested and put in jail until the debt was paid. And when the other servants saw this going on,

they were outraged and brought a detailed report to the king. Write this down if you're taking notes. This is to me, when you forget what you owed, you make people pay. When you forget what you owed, you make people pay. I know, Liz knows I'm not perfect. She knows that sometimes I leave the closet doors open. She don't like that. She knows that sometimes my car can be a little bit messy. And she don't like that. But what helps our relationship get through is that I know it too. I know it too, I'm aware, I've accepted it. And so that's a big part of it. You gotta know what you smell and what you smell like. And let me just help you real quick. If you married and you don't know, he knows, she knows. Ask your spouse, that could be a great question for the car ride home. Hey babe, do I smell? What do I smell like? What area of my life is bothering you that I could work? Because I know I got some stuff that I wanna know because I don't wanna walk out here just smelling up the joint. Let me know. If you're single, ask a good friend who ain't afraid to tell you the truth. Because I promise you, your friend knows.

Your friend knows. And so I work on it. And I'm good. But you know what else helps? That I know she ain't perfect. And she knows she ain't perfect. I know there are some things that she does that she goes to bed, she has a hard time getting to bed on time. And it bothers me, but I love her. And so she has a whole routine. Her bedtime routine takes 45 minutes to an hour. It includes a lot of steps. There's rogaine for the eyebrows. There's, sometimes there's shopping online. 10.30 last night, the printer was going. Something was printing. I was a part of the routine. But you know why I'm okay? Because I know I got stuff. And I know that if she loves me with my stuff, I'm gonna love her with her stuff. And I'm gonna extend the grace that the grace is being shown to me. When you understand what you've been forgiven, when you understand what you owe, when you understand what you got, there's a grace that you extend to other people. You know what else that helps me? It helps me focus on me.

Because if I was the person in that story that owed $100,000 going after the person who owed 10, I wouldn't be wasting my energy trying to get my $10. I'd be putting my energy and figuring out why I owed $100,000 to begin with. What is wrong with me? How can I grow? How can I develop? This is the next step in getting you right. Listen, you can grow to be the me you want to see. Grow to be the me you want. Once you know you got some stuff, then you can start working on that stuff. You can start growing and developing. Look at Matthew 7, three. Look at it again. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? First, take the plank out of your own eye. Then you will see. Why the eye? Why was Jesus focusing this metaphor on the eye? And here's why I think he was focusing this metaphor on the eye. Because the more you're looking at what someone else is missing, the more you're missing out on the ways you could be growing. He said, you can't see it, but there's some things in you, you can grow.

I want to do a little experiment here at Fern Park. I want to do a little experiment at East Orlando, Kissimmee, online. You can put it in the chat. What are some of the things that you want in a spouse? Now, that's either your spouse that you currently have, a spouse that you would like to have one day. If you're afraid to say it because you're sitting next to your spouse, just pretend, like, the answer is something that your spouse already has that you like. So, when they ask you on the car ride home, why did you shout that out? I was just affirming what you already had, baby. One of those things. But we're gonna do a little interaction here. So, I just need you to shout at me. I want to maybe, like, 20 things I want to get all together.

What are some things you look for in a spouse? Come on, I want to hear you out. You look for in a spouse? Discipline. Discipline. Resilience. That's good. Faithful. Huh? Honesty. That's a great one. Huh? Self-confidence. Self-control. Okay. Self-control. There's a testimony behind that. I felt that. I felt it. I felt it. What's that? What you got? Loyalty. Leadership. That's a good one. Huh? Loving. Forgiveness. That's a great one.

How about over here in the chairs, with the hard chairs? What's... What was that? Ooh, she shouted that, like, from the... from the chest. Accountability! Please God, accountability! What you got? Obedience. Obedience. What happened? Confidence. Consistency. Respectful. Humor. Ownership. Yeah, beauty. All right. Okay, we got enough. Look at me. All the things you said, are you that? Are you that? Are you that? Because I have found that sometimes I want in others what I'm lacking in me. Somebody told me, they said,

someone said, she said, I don't want to be with them unless he makes six figures. I was like, six? Six figures? She said, yeah. I was like, I was trying to understand. You know who don't care if he makes six figures? The one who's already making six figures. She good. So what we can do is start focusing on our business. Start increasing our value to the workforce. Start saving up money to buy our house and not have to look for that kind of security or provision because I can provide for myself. I'm going to work that out in me. You got to be careful. I want him to be jacked. I want her to have the teardrop quadriceps. Do you work out? The only teardrop you got is the teardrop right there on your eye. I want him to be a man of God. I want her to be a woman of God. Are you? Are you? I wish my husband could be more selfless. I wish she,

my wife, would serve me more. Do you? Do you? I think what we're often looking for in other people is to be completed. And it never works. So we're waiting for someone. That's if you're single, you're waiting for the one. And the thing is, you wouldn't ever say it, but I'm waiting for the one because there's something in me that is incomplete that will be complete for the rest of my life. And so I'm waiting for the one. And sometimes we're married and we still feel incomplete and we're like, I'm looking somewhere else for it now because she's not completing me and there's someone else out there maybe who can complete me. And do you know what the number one problem with waiting for the one or wondering if you married the wrong one is, the number one problem with waiting for the one or wondering if you married the wrong one? Here it is, ready? There is no one. Who can be secure enough to solve your insecurity because they're wrestling with their own insecurities. There is no one who can be the answer to your question because they got their own questions.

There is no one who can be the strength for your weakness because they got their own weaknesses. And there is no one who can complete your incompleteness because they got their own incompleteness. There is no one. There is no one. And if you don't know that, that there is no one, you'll start to think that something's wrong with you. You'll start to look at the void, look at the emptiness and think, what's wrong with me? You'll be single for five years, and you'll be like, oh my gosh, what's wrong with me? Why am I single? I know I should be feeling more fulfilled. I know I should be happy. What's wrong with me? You'll be divorced or widowed. It's been five years since my last relationship, and what's wrong with me? Why do I still feel this void? Why do I still feel this incompleteness? Why do I still feel this emptiness? You'll be married, and you'll be married to somebody great. You'll be married to a wife that cares for you, a husband that provides for you, that comes home every night and with the perfect spouse or the seemingly perfect spouse, you'll still ask yourself, what's wrong with me? Because I feel, even though they're doing good, I feel like it's not, I'm not happy anymore. What's wrong with me?

And if that's you today, I want to let you know, God is speaking to you and going, what's wrong with you? Here's what God says, it's not you, it's me. The thing you've been missing in your life, it's not a fault in you, it's the evidence of my existence. You need me, it's not you, it's me. Here's what happens at the end of Jonah's story when he gets thrown off the boat. Jonah chapter two, verse six through seven, my head, he's going down in the ocean right now. My head was all tangled in seaweed at the bottom of the sea where the mountains take root. I was as far down as a body can go and the gates were slamming shut behind me forever. Yet, you pulled me up from that grave alive. Oh God, my God, when my life was slipping away, I remembered God. I wrote it like this, listen, there's something about hitting the bottom that makes you look up. Single people, single people, you're not supposed to go looking for love, you're supposed to look up. Married people, you're not supposed to look elsewhere for love or even look at that person for love, you're supposed to look up. If you're widowed or divorced here today, you're not supposed to look back for love. You're supposed to look up. Here's what Jesus says in Revelations 3.20,

look at me, I stand at the door and knock. If you hear me call, open the door, I'll come right in and I'll sit down to supper with you. Jesus says, if you hear me knock, open the door to your heart, let me come in. And here's what I love about Jesus, and when I come in, I don't need a second guest. When I come in, I don't bring a plus one because when I come into your heart, I am more than enough to fill it. When I come into your heart, I'm more than enough. Can I ask you a question, single person? And even married person, but really, I want a single person. Why do you want someone? And really think about it, why do you want someone? I think there are a lot of answers to that question, but I narrow them down to three. I'll say the first is companionship. I just don't wanna be alone, Pastor JJ. Just want somebody who's gonna be with me through the thick and the thin, amen. But who's gonna be with you more than Jesus? Not even the perfect spouse can prevent cancer. Not even the perfect spouse can prevent a car crash or a plane crash, no matter how loving a person be. Not even that person can promise to be with you forever, but there is one person who will be with you every breath of your life. They will be with you through the last breath of your life and they will be with you on the other side

of the last breath of your life. That's Jesus. What are you looking for in a relationship? Understanding? I get that, but who's gonna understand you better than Jesus? The Bible says that the heart is so deceitfully wicked that not even the person who owns the heart can understand it, but the spirit that is inside the person that can understand it. In other words, God understands you better than you understand you. Why do you want another person? You wanna be real? Sexual needs? Come on, somebody. That used to be my answer. Every time I was a teenager and my pastor was like, Jesus was all you need. He could fulfill all your needs. I was like, not all of them. How many people glad that we talk about the real things at this church? That sounds real good, Pastor. All my needs, not all of them. Well, let's talk about that for a second. First off, sex isn't a need. I know that's a shocker, man, but a need is something that you can't live without. Oxygen, shelter, water.

Last I checked, I ain't never heard nobody die. You hear about Tim? What happened? They didn't get any. It's a goner. And then, when you get older, see when you're a teenager and your hormones are raging, that's all you think about. But when you get older, you start to realize that there's a difference between an orgasm and sex. Because they're not the same, because you can have an orgasm by yourself, hello. But still long for sex. How come that? Because what we really want is more than an orgasm. What we want is intimacy. And do you know what intimacy is? Intimacy is someone loving the naked you. I'm not just talking about the you without clothes, I'm talking about the you that doesn't have to pretend. The you that doesn't have to act. The you that doesn't have to be strong. The you that doesn't have to fit into a certain size dress. The you that doesn't have to have the six pack. The you that doesn't have to always be funny. The you that can be corny. The you that is a fairy. The you that can make mistakes. The you that is broken. And who loves that you more than Jesus? You ain't never gonna find somebody to love the you, you, like Jesus. You know what else intimacy is?

Intimacy is someone else laying down their naked body for you. And who laid down their naked body better than Jesus who laid naked on a cross for you so you can have hope, so you can have peace, so you can have forgiveness, so you can have joy, so you can have life, so you can have healing, so you can be whole, so you wouldn't need another man, you wouldn't need another woman, you wouldn't need another person to complete you. He said, here I am. Take my body. It's the bread that is eternal life. Take my blood. It is yours so that you can live in eternity. Who else do you need to love you aside from Jesus? Listen to me when I tell you this, church. Jesus is all you need. And He fills every need in your heart. Please stand. If you are all over this room, stand as we close. If you can't stand, you can stay seated. But I need to get this in your soul. He is all you need and all you ever need. Is it nice to have a spouse? Absolutely. It's great. But it's in addition to an already blessed life. It's in addition to an already blessed life. I told Liz the other day, it's okay if you're not in the mood to kiss me. Except kiss wasn't the thing we were talking about. I just needed her to know, because I felt like there was a pressure on her to be a wife to me. And I told her, I said, babe, if we never again, Jesus is all I ever need.

And I meant it. I know you think He's frying, He's capping, He's lying. That man's a liar. Pastor's lying right now. If you think I'm lying, you have never experienced intimacy with Christ. It's the best part of my day. Being alone with Him. And it can be the best part of yours. I promise. Every head down, every eye closed in this room. That ease, that kissing me. God, we got a lot of empty hearts this morning. A lot of single people who swear that that person is going to be the answer to their problems. And they're not. Start to a series. And if you made that decision to follow Christ today, we are so excited for you. We're so glad that you made that decision. 10 out of 10, best recommended for you to make that decision to follow Christ. And we're so excited for you. Now, for those next steps, after you made this decision, you can go ahead and scan that QR code below. Or go to www.forwardslashdecision so you can get more connected now on this walk that you have gone down. So, Journey Church, what an amazing, amazing start to our series, our love, sex, and marriage. And what you can also do, if you want to recap on the message, you can go download our Journey Church app. So you can keep in contact with what we have going on all journey. And also prayer requests. And last but not least, you can also go ahead and scan the QR code for generosity. If you would like to give and be a part of what we're doing at Journey and making Jesus accessible to anyone. We're so glad that you came in today. We're so glad that you were able to hear the word today. And I hope that it pierced your heart like it did mine.

And we're so excited to see you next week. So you guys have a good one, okay? Bye. Bye.