Honor Each Other | Pastor Jud

Well, come on guys, what an amazing time of worship. I am just so glad that we get to gather and worship every single weekend. I need to give a big shout out to all the men and women watching with our partnership with God Behind Bars. Can we please clap it up for them? We love you guys and you are such an important part of our church. Hey, if you wanna follow along with the teaching notes of our message today, you can find that in the Central Church app. But for now, let's give it up big for Pastor Jud as he comes out and brings us a message of hope. All right, all right, all right. Welcome everybody, great to see you today. I wanna say a big welcome and shout out to our Central family locations that are joining us. We wanna welcome Central Summerland, Central Aliante, Central Sunrise Mountain, and Central Kingman. Thank you guys for being here with us. Let's give it up for them. Well, hey, I wonder how many of you might remember about a year ago, there was a couple that went to a Coldplay concert. And they ended up on the Kiss Cam. We'll show a little picture here of that moment. And all was well, they were holding each other, looks like everything was good. And then they realized they were on the big jumbotron and suddenly they pulled away

and they all kind of tried to hide. And I had read that Chris Martin, the lead singer of Coldplay, made a comment. He said, either those two are having an affair or they're just really shy. Well, it turns out they weren't shy, right? He was the CEO, she was his HR person, and they were both married to other people. And the internet blew up and had a field day. And it kind of went all over the world. Now, she's made some public statements saying that she was separated from her husband and she thought he was separated from his wife. I don't know if he's made public statements or not, but here's the thing, both of them lost their jobs, they lost their reputation, and they lost their privacy. The consequences were severe, more than they probably could have ever imagined when they loaded up and headed to the Coldplay concert that night. And you know, the truth is, every day, virtually, in the headlines, there's somebody whose life is being imploded because of sexual impropriety, adultery, sexual scandal. I mean, it's like every day we see this. And we live in this totally sexualized culture where we're just inundated with sexual images, sexual ads. We see it all around us. OnlyFans, for instance, in the last 10 years, it's become a $7 billion business

with three times the revenue of the New York Times. I mean, you know, we live in a culture where pornographic images are just available on every mobile device, in every kid's pocket, everywhere we go, it's all around us. And yet, and yet, it still feels like we're as disconnected as ever, as confused and frustrated as ever, and maybe even as lonely as ever. And I wonder if it's time for some of us to maybe lean back in to Jesus' teaching and biblical teaching about sex and sexuality and marriage and adultery and how we manage this part of our lives. And that's what we're gonna do today because we're just continuing on in the Sermon on the Mount. And here's the thing, when you are faithful to continue on through scripture, you have to teach on some passages that are really challenging. And this one today we're gonna look at is gonna be challenging. This is an area where I feel like we all have passed our history. Some of us have had really painful experiences, difficulties, breakups, abuse, God forbid. Some of us have come from a long history of shame and discouragement related to these kinds of issues. So I just wanna tread with compassion and grace

and just realize how complicated it is. But it's important that we talk about some of these things because Jesus talked about some of these things. So we started last week in this series called Five Relationship Rules. And the first relationship rule was this, to fight for peace. Because Jesus challenged us to realize that anger is a very real thing and we need to deal with anger at the heart level. Today the relationship rule is simply this, to honor each other, to honor each other. Let's look at what Jesus says, Matthew chapter five, verse 27. When we get to the red word, if you'll say that here with me. Jesus says, you have heard the commandment that says you must not commit adultery. But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his what? in his heart. You say, like, dang, Jesus, talk about setting the bar high. Like, what's going on with this? Well, a few things. First of all, notice, just like with anger, Jesus says, you've heard that it was said, referring to the Old Testament, the commandment, and then he moves it to the issue of the heart. He did the same thing with anger before this, and we'll see him do it again and again.

In other words, Jesus doesn't want us to just reduce our morality to simply actions and not realize that those things start in the heart, right? And so he's gonna challenge us. Now, I think he's doing a couple things here. One is, I think he's intentionally trying to shock us, shock his original hearers, wake them up, get them to go like, what? Secondly, I think he's basically, like, the word, like, you could read this and think, man, if I just look at somebody and think, wow, they're attractive, does that mean I've committed adultery with them in my heart? And I don't think that's what Jesus is saying. First of all, the word look at is an interesting word. It means to cultivate. One translation talks about the word incubate. In other words, you're not just looking at somebody and noticing, oh, they're attractive, or maybe you have a lustful thought go by in your mind. You're cultivating it, you're incubating it. You're not just watching the commercial, you're watching the movie. Hello, right? So that's what the idea of looking at somebody lustfully is all about, but I think what Jesus is trying to do is to say, hey, don't just, it's easy to just think, look, I've never cheated on anybody, I've never done that, right? Just like last week, I've never murdered anybody,

and Jesus goes, well, go back to your heart, right? And this week, you're like, well, hey, I've never cheated on anybody or whatever. Jesus goes, well, let's take it back to the heart, right? Because all of these things start at the heart level. And so we're gonna unpack some of this, unpack what Jesus means, but part of the deal, I think, is when we look at the biblical teaching, I think Jesus wants to save us from some hurt and some pain. He wants to keep us from ending up on the Coldplay Kiss Cam, okay? And ending up in the headline, and ending up as another statistic, and ending up with a lot of difficulty and painful situations that we have to navigate and manage. And I think it's easy to hear this and to just think, man, God just wants to repress sexuality, but I don't think he wants to repress it, I think he wants to redeem it. I think he wants to redeem everything in our lives. He wants to forgive us and heal us and restore us and redeem our past and give us a future and a family and a focus and a purpose and a ministry. He wants us to walk in new life with him. That's the big goal. And so let's dive in. How do we honor each other in a way that would align with Jesus' teaching? Well, I think one challenge from his teaching is to just remember your value and their value.

Remember your value and their value. Remember, I heard a story about a guy named David, he was living with his girlfriend, Alison, but when his mom came over, he said, hey, we're just hanging out, we're just, you know, we're not really in a relationship, we're just roommates, you know, trying to save on rent. And so that's kind of how he pitched it to his mom. And a few days later, like, Alison walks in and she goes, hey, you know, I don't know where my watch is. Like, I gave it to your mom when we were eating together and she looked at it, and I don't know if she ever gave it back because I can't find it since she had it. Will you reach out to her and email her and just see if she might know where the watch is? And he goes, yeah, yeah, I'll do that. So he writes this email. He says, dear mom, I'm not saying that you did take Alison's watch by accident. I'm not saying that you didn't, but the fact remains that the watch has been missing ever since you had it over here for dinner. Love, David. So, you know, a few days later, he gets an email back from his mother and it reads this, dear son, I'm not saying that you do sleep with Alison, and I'm not saying that you don't sleep with Alison, but the fact remains that if Alison is sleeping

in her own bed, she would have found the watch by now. Love, mom. Don't mess with mom. Come on, moms, right? Don't mess with mom. Don't mess with mom. Before I became a follower of Christ, when I would kind of hear the sort of biblical teaching or Jesus words about sexuality and stuff, man, I would just get really frustrated. It just seemed kind of insane to me. It was like so restrictive. And you're just like, God, what are you doing? I can remember thinking as a young person, like, God, you created this whole thing, and then you gave us all these wild hormones, right? And then we can't do anything with it. We can only act on it within the context of a postage stamp, you know? And I think part of what I wasn't understanding is what God was actually trying to protect me and us from in our lives. So the biblical teaching is that. Sex should be reserved within the context of marriage. You see it all the way back in the book of Genesis. I mean, you know, God comes to Adam and Eve and he says, you know, be fruitful and multiply and y'all, he's not talking about gardening, you know what I mean? Sex is like God's idea.

God invented it, God created it, he dreamed it up, it's his plan, it's his thing, it's his purpose. What we do as a fallen world is we take the good thing he created and we often corrupt it and distort it, but he created it good and righteous and holy, it's a good thing. There's a whole book in the Bible dedicated to like romantic sexual loves called the Song of Songs and you know, God is not shocked by sexual desires and feelings, he created them. And so I think we just have to start there, but then why would he restrict them to this commitment and this relationship of marriage? Like what's the point of that? I think part of the dynamic is that we underestimate how powerful sexual experiences can be. For instance, let me just show you this picture. This is a Ferrari 430, look at that, amazing car. I think when that was actually sold, it sold for like $288,000. I think they only made, you know, I think 400 and something of them, amazing car. But as soon as it got driven off the lot, this is what happened an hour later, look at that. This was in the UK, I believe. And the guy actually walked away from this accident, but when they was talking to the police officer, he told the officer, I only had the car for one hour. One hour, come on, can you imagine? Like he thought he could handle it, come on somebody.

He thought, yeah, it's fast, but I got this, right? You know, like I know it's powerful, but I got this. I know that like, you know, it's gonna take corners but I can handle it, I'm in control. And he was in control until he wasn't. And can I just suggest to you that a lot of people think that about sex today. They can handle it, it's not that big a deal. You know what our culture says? Sex is just an act, just something you do physically. What's interesting is as you read through the Bible, the Bible challenges us to realize that sex is not just a physical thing, it's a spiritual thing. And that because God's spirit is within us, it matters what we do with our physical bodies. And so it challenges us to step back and realize that God is at work here. Another thing I think also happens when you jump in the sack before there's real commitment in a relationship, and that is you start to lose your mind. Have you ever noticed that people, when they start to fall in love, lose perspective? Come on somebody, you know what I mean? Like they get the butterflies, you know, how you doing? I'm doing great, man, I'm just so great. You ever been around somebody, you just wanna go vomit? You wanna go throw up? Because they're just like, oh, come on, gosh.

They don't hang around with their friends anymore. They've lost all common sense. They're just like, where do you wanna go? What do you wanna do? Where do you wanna go? Their whole life gets just, all of a sudden it's in orbit around this person. They're in love. And you know what it means when you're in love, when you're in that kind of butterfly stage of love? It means like half of your brain is dead. Right? But then if you jump in the sack, you know what happens? Another 25% of your brain is dead. Now you're 75% brain dead. And you're in a relationship that it's a lot harder to get out of. Come on somebody, I've talked to a lot of people over the years that have like, yeah, I knew we should like probably go our separate ways, but we were involved, and it was layered, and it was a lot harder to untangle, and like there's all these dynamics. And I think part of the whole deal is that God wants to spare us some of the pain that comes from all of those dynamics. So look at what 1 Corinthians 6, verse 19 says. The Apostle Paul says this. He says, don't you realize that your body is the what? The temple of the Holy Spirit who lives in you

and was given to you by God. And sometimes people will say, well yeah, my body is a temple. And this is kind of where that comes from, right? That passage in Corinthians. And I think, you know, like it's interesting, the context isn't about like eating clean. My body's a temple, I only eat carrots, right? It's not about eating clean, that's not the context. It's not about staying physically fit. I think you should eat good, yeah, that's great. I think you should hit the gym, stay physically fit, great, awesome. The context when Paul says my body is a temple is about basically managing your life sexually in such a way that honors God. That's the context when he says your body is a temple. You're a temple of the Holy Spirit. God dwells in you as a follower of Jesus. So sex isn't just a physical act. spiritual act, and when God looks at you, he sees his child, he sees you with the love and commitment that he has for you. He has forgiven you in Jesus Christ, and you can honor him then with your body. Listen, if you're a follower of Jesus today, I want you to hear this above all else. You are not damaged, you're not the sum total of all your mistakes, you are the temple of God's spirit. You're the temple of God's spirit.

You're not a number on a scale, you're not a clothing size, you're not all those harsh words others may have called you, you are not simply what you see in the mirror, what you maybe least like about yourself or your appearance, you aren't your wrinkles or your acne or your thin hair or your thick hair or your curly hair or your gray hair or your no hair at all, you are the temple of God's spirit. Right, you're not what happened to you, you're not what they did to you, you're not what they want from you, you're not like how they made you feel, you're not your breakup, your divorce, your strained relationship, your past abuse, you are the temple of God's spirit. God places a high value on you. And that should impact how we see others as well. You know, everybody that you may have a lustful thought about is somebody's daughter, somebody's son, created in the image of God, and in the end they have high value as well. And so Jesus is gonna challenge us to realize our own value but also realize their value and try not to objectify other people as if they're just there for our pleasure, but honor them as beings made in the image of God. So that's the first thought, realize your value. Here's a second thought if we wanna honor each other, and that is run from temptation, run from temptation. So if we weren't already freaked out enough, Jesus is gonna go on a little further here.

Check this out, Matthew chapter five, beginning in verse 29, Jesus says this, so if your eye, even your good eye, causes you to lust, gouge it out and throw it away. Say what? It's better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. What is happening? And if your hand, even your stronger hand, causes you to sin, cut it off and what? Throw it away, don't need that hand. It's better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. So what is Jesus doing here? Well, first of all, I think we have to realize that Jesus doesn't literally expect you to go gouge your eye out and chop your hand off. None of his followers did this. None of his immediate disciples did this. Jesus meant this literally, right? We have a whole different level of application. This is hyperbole, this is exaggeration. This is actually what Jewish teachers would do so it wouldn't have been that foreign to hear a Jewish teacher at that time use hyperbole and exaggeration and this imagery because the Jewish teachers, when they talk about the eye, that's often a connection to your thoughts. When they talk about the hand, that's a connection to your actions, right? And so here's what Jesus is saying.

He's just saying, don't minimize the seriousness of objectifying someone and incubating lustful thoughts about them. That's what grows into adultery, right? He's like, don't minimize that. In fact, basically gouge your lustful thoughts out of your mind. Cut your lustful actions off before they actually occur. That's what Jesus is trying to get at in our lives. And it's a challenge. I mean, I remember when I was a brand new follower of Jesus, I went to work at a water park. And so I'm a night, I mean, I know that I'm supposed to be like sexually pure, but I'm 19 years old and I got hormones pumping through my veins, right? And all day long, I'm at a water park filled with girls in bikinis, right? I'm just telling you, man, it was like challenging. And I remember one day I was like in this back area where we kind of kept some of our gear before we went out. And I had a friend there who was also, we were the only two guys that were like trying to follow Jesus. And we had talked about it, you know, we were honest about it with one another. And I remember one day I watched him and he took his shoe off and he was doing something to his shoe. I said, what are you doing? He goes, oh, he goes, well, I just put a little cross

on the very end of my shoe. And that way, when I'm tempted to lust, I just look down at Jesus. and remember all that he did for me. I'm like, I need to do that too. I was like, give me that pen. So I put a little cross on my shoe. Here's the deal, like, you know, I think this is what Jesus is getting at. That might be silly, that might be extreme. I'm sure you're all above and beyond all of that. I just think his point is be intentional, right? Be intentional, be aware. Adultery doesn't just happen. It happens over time. It happens with many thoughts cultivated. It's a process that goes back to the heart level. He's like, cut it out at the heart level. You don't end up on, you know, the kiss scam at the Coldplay concert. Cut it back at the heart level. So what do we do when we're tempted sexually? And by the way, let me say this, like, I have put boundaries in my life around this area for decades, and I've been very vigilant about it. What I know is all of us are capable of anything. And so we have to, we need accountability in our lives. We need to ask people to speak into our lives. We need to get people around us

that aren't just yes people, but people that will speak the truth to us. And I've tried to do that in my life, and you know what I've seen over the years? I've had more than one friend who was a pastor commit adultery, and the impact that that had, blowing up his family, not only blowing up his family, but blowing up the church, and it's like a bomb goes off in the church. So many people lose trust and get discouraged, and then it ripples out into the community. I've seen it several times in my ministry life. So many people get impacted. I had a guy ask me once, he said, Judd, how do you stay on the straight and narrow? And I really didn't even think, just the thing that came out of my mouth is, I said, people trust me. People trust me. God's trusted me to lead this church. You've trusted me to operate with integrity and do the things I say I'm gonna do and be the person that I stand up here and am before you. And I'm not perfect, but I'm trying to live worthy of the trust others have put in me. And can I just say to you, you're the same. People trust you. Your spouse trusts you. Your kids trust you. Your friends trust you.

Your community group trusts you. We all need to try to be the people others are counting on us to be. And one of Jesus' challenges is, man, take this seriously, because this can creep up on you, and then it can cause a whole lot of hurt and pain and difficulty in your life. So what do we do when we're tempted sexually? Well, the Bible gives us one word primarily, and that is this word, run, run. And not a little jog. Run like your life depends on it, because it does. I mean, what do you do when flirting with someone starts to kind of take off and go to another level? You should run, especially if that's not someone you should be flirting with. Like, what do you do when you're tempted with images or pornography or all the things that come at us today? You should run. What do you do when your desires start to lead you down a dangerous path? Run. Like, redirect. Gouge it out. Cut it off. So that it doesn't grow and become something else in your life. Third thought I have for you is simply this, and that is to seek God's forgiveness.

This is a heavy topic. Thank you, Jesus. He goes right there, right for it. It's hard, but here's the thing, and I think if we're honest, most of us, all of us have made mistakes in this area in our lives, and we carry a lot of different weight related to it. For some of us, it's shame. For some, it's guilt. For some, it's regret. For some, it's pain. For some, it's confusion. For some, it's frustration. But here's the thing. I want you to know, whatever you may struggle with, you can bring it to God. You can confess it to him, and then you can receive his forgiveness because God loves to forgive. He's a graceful God that loves to forgive, and nothing you have ever done puts you outside of his goodness and his grace. None of the mistakes you've made have put you outside of his love. In fact, look, sexual sin is not the unforgivable sin. Thank God. And as you look through the Bible, like a lot of the people God uses in tremendous ways, if you look through their past,

it's a pretty colorful past, right? I mean, you got all kinds of things in there. You got people with multiple wives. You got concubines. You got affairs. You got sexual immorality. You got sex workers. It's all. in the Bible, and God uses these people and more when they come to him and surrender to him and they follow him in their life. He wants to redeem our entire lives and this is just a part of it. This is a part of it. And if we'll bring it to him, he can move and work powerfully in our lives. You know, we have an amazing community here that just focuses on all areas of life, trying to get accountability, trying to heal, trying to grow, and that's our Celebrate Recovery community. And I just want to say, if you need to heal from something in your life, abuse, a difficult situation, a tough breakup, that community could be a powerful resource for you across our locations. If you need accountability in your life for a struggle, that community could be a great resource for you in your life. If you just need hope and encouragement and somebody to pray for you,

that community could be a great encouragement for you in your life. And we as a church want to be a place where we honestly care and love about each other, love each other, where we honor each other, and where we don't walk around judging each other. So this is what I see Christians often do. They'll take a passage like this and then they just go out and start hitting everybody over the head with it, right? You know, you need to be this way. And, you know, are you guys, are you guys married? What are you guys doing? You know, like God didn't call us to be the police. That's the Holy Spirit's job. God called us to love and walk with people and encourage people. And you gotta know, across our locations, not everybody walking into our church is even a believer yet. Not everybody walking into our church is in the same place we are. We're not the high priest and the judge. That's God's job. Our job is to love people and encourage them and cheerlead them and help them grow in their faith. So this is just an area where I would say, don't get too caught up looking around at everybody else. Look in your own heart. Because that's what Jesus is challenging us to do, right?

Look in your own heart and say, God, let me be, I wanna grow and be the kind of person you want me to be in my own heart. Here's what Paul says in 1 Corinthians 6, beginning in verse 19. He says, you do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a what? With a high price. So you must honor God with your body. God bought you with a high price. He sent his one and only son to die on the cross to pay the price for our sins. That means you have high value. You don't belong to your failures. You don't belong to your past. Look, you're more than your pain. You're more than your regrets. You're more than your shame. Your self-worth isn't set by what others say or don't say. You don't, look, you haven't been cast into the discount bin of life. God bought you with a high price. Your sins are forgiven in Jesus Christ. Your future is secure. Your salvation is set and your reward is waiting. He bought you with a high price. So honor him with your body. Remember your value. Run from temptation and seek God's forgiveness. God wants to redeem everything in our lives, including this.

And as we come to him and surrender to him, he can do that. He can save us from a lot of pain and hurt, and he can point us to more fulfillment in him. So honor each other. Maybe you're here today and you've never crossed that line of faith. I just want to remind you, God paid a high price for you. He loves you. And through faith and through trust, you can come to God. You can believe in him. You can begin that spiritual journey. You can follow him. You can be forgiven. You can find a purpose. You can find a greater sense of joy in your life. God can move and work. I've seen him do it a thousand times. He can do it in your life if you'll just surrender to him. So I want to ask all of you to bow your heads and close your eyes across our locations. If you'd like to become a follower of Jesus today, you could begin that journey by just repeating this prayer after me. You could say this either out loud or in your own heart and mind. You say, dear God, I thank you for loving me. Thank you for sending Jesus into the world. I believe he died on the cross for my sins. I believe he rose again. Forgive me for my sins.

Give me the gift of eternal life. Help me face the challenges I'm up against. God, I surrender my life to you in Christ's name. And friends, with every head bowed and every eye closed, if that's your prayer, if it's your commitment today, I want to ask you to just slip your hand in the air. Wherever you're at today, if you're watching online, if you're in one of our partnership locations with God Behind Bars, just slip your hand in the air. If you're at one of our central family locations, slip your hand in the air. Just acknowledge you're gonna trust him. He paid a high price for you so you could live for him. God, we thank you for your love. We thank you for each person just reaching out to you, trusting you today. And God, we pray that you'll forgive and heal and restore, do a supernatural work in their life as they follow you. God, we thank you. We praise you in Christ's name, amen. Amen, let's put our hands together for those who made spiritual commitments. Listen, if you made a spiritual commitment, we'd love to see you right after our experience out in our lobby area. Just go up to our next step, new to central area, let them know you made a spiritual commitment. We'd love to put some resources in your hands that'll be helpful to you as you grow in your faith. Well, let's put our hands together now

for our different locations. If you would stand together with me.