Empty is the New Full | Kyle Idleman

this video to worship with us at Southeast Christian Church in Louisville, Kentucky today. My name is Derek. I'm our online campus pastor and again we're so glad that you specifically are here to worship with us. And as you go through out service today and over the next week, if you find yourself wanting someone to come beside you in prayer, just someone to share your story with, I wouldn't fight you to do that and share your story. Let us know how we can be praying for you. And you can do that by specifically writing us letters. We have a group of people here at Southeast that respond to those each week. And so you can find the address to our church in the description of this video so you can reach out and connect with us. And when you do that, y'all, you join over 35,000 people just like you all across the country that watch our weekend services, our Bible studies, our podcasts that we put on the Panto app every single week. And so we always just love celebrating that to let you know that you're not the only one watching our church that you're a part of a church family on Panto that is worshiping the Lord Jesus together. But today specifically, you're going to hear from our senior pastor Kyle Eidelman who's starting a brand new sermon series. It's going to be four weeks long called Flip It. And he's going to be talking about Kingdom values in an upside-down world. And you're going to hear a little bit more about that specifically today and over the next couple of weeks. But Kyle is basing this sermon series around something that we call the Beatitudes that come in the Gospel of Matthew chapter 5. And so many of these Beatitudes start with the word blessed. So like for example, one of the ones you're going to hear today are blessed are the poor in spirit, right? Or blessed are those who mourn for they will be comforted. And in so many ways in our world today, we think that actually you're probably blessed if you have a lot of money, maybe if you have a huge family, if things are going really well. But what Jesus tells us in the Beatitudes are how we should specifically be seeing life through the lens of his Kingdom. Y'all, so I think that today specifically, you're going to be impacted by what Kyle talks about when he talks about how empty is the new whole. Y'all, we love you. We're grateful that you're here with us. So let's go

worship together. ♪ ♪ ♪ And I was so grateful for you ♪ ♪ There was no way until you made one ♪ ♪ Grace upon grace, how they really are ♪ ♪ Even though I don't deserve it ♪ ♪ You did it ♪ ♪ And even though I couldn't earn it ♪ ♪ You gave it ♪ ♪ We see ♪ ♪ Who am I ♪ ♪ That you keep me on your mind ♪ ♪ God, I'm just grateful for you ♪ ♪ God, I'm just grateful for you ♪ ♪ All my life ♪ ♪ You've been right here by my side ♪ ♪ God, I'm just grateful for you ♪ ♪ God, I'm just grateful for you ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ You hold me whole day ♪ ♪ There's only one ♪ ♪ I gave you glory ♪ ♪ For all of you have done ♪ ♪ Even though I don't deserve it ♪ ♪ You did it ♪ ♪ Yes, you did Lord ♪ ♪ And even though I couldn't earn it ♪ ♪ You gave it ♪ ♪ Who am I ♪ ♪ We see ♪

♪ Who am I ♪ ♪ God, I'm just grateful for you ♪ ♪ God, I'm just grateful for you ♪ ♪ All my life, all my life ♪ ♪ You've been right here by my side ♪ ♪ God, I'm just grateful for you ♪ ♪ God, I'm just grateful for you ♪ ♪ Who am I ♪ ♪ Who am I ♪ ♪ That you keep me eye on my guide ♪ ♪ I'm just grateful for you ♪ ♪ God, I'm just grateful for you ♪ ♪ Whoa, oh my life ♪ ♪ You've been right here by my side ♪ ♪ God, I'm just grateful for you ♪ ♪ God, I'm just grateful for you ♪ ♪ Whoa ♪ ♪ We wanna give you praise ♪ ♪ All around glory ♪ ♪ Because you deserve it Lord ♪ ♪ Come on, we worship the Father ♪ I'm getting all that I am, everything cause you gave me chance after chance, after chance, and I'm lifting both of my hands, cause you gave me chance after chance, after chance, and I'm getting all that I am, cause you gave me chance after chance, after chance, you gave me chance after chance, after chance, after chance, and I'm getting all that I am, he's been here, God, we're so grateful, so we sing to you, King, we're all we, that you will sing, that you will hear, we're so grateful, all we have is a hallelujah, so we sing, God, I'm so grateful for you, God, I'm so grateful for you, oh, I said, if I'm never here to testify, I'm gonna sing how good you are, because I'm gonna test them only, if they say I'll remind my God, I'm just grateful for you, God, I'm just grateful for you.

[Music] Blessed are those who are under, who place their open confidence in Jesus, he won't forsake them. Blessed are those who seek his face, bend their knee and fix the gaze on Jesus, they won't be shaken. Come on and praise the Lord with me, oh, sing if you love his name, come on and love your voice with me, 'cause he's worthy of all our friends, yes you were. Blessed are those who are up within, it's hard to stand on pilgrimage with Jesus, they'll see in his glory, and blessed are those who die and live, whose joy it is to get it all for Jesus, and forgive all me, oh, Jesus, it's hard for your Lord, come on and praise the Lord with me, sing if you love his name, come on and love your voice with me, he's worthy of all our friends, oh, come on and praise the Lord for him, he's worthy of all our friends, oh, he's worthy of all our friends, - That's where the Amen Church. We've all come here to the house today to bless the Lord and to bless Him only. And He is so worthy. So let's sing this like we mean, and let's lift our voices loud as we can and proclaim. Let's God in this sanctuary. Let's God in the field to play. I'll bless God in my darkest valley. Every chance we get, we bless His name. Let's God with my hands are empty. Let's God with the praise that calls me. And bless God when nobody's watching. Every chance I get, I bless your name. Let's God with the witness holy. Let's God who wants to follow me. Let's God, because He goes before me. Every chance I get, I bless your name.

Let's God who we hold your victory. Let's God who He's always with me. Let's God who He's always worthy. Every chance I get, I bless your name. Every chance I get, I bless your name. Let's go, come on and praise the Lord with me. Oh, sing if you love is me. Come on and praise your voice with me, because He's worthy of all our friends. Come on and praise your offering. Let's sing if you love is great. We lift you up. Come on and let love be all over the hands, because He's worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are. He's worthy of all our friends. God, you're worthy of all our friends. You are worthy of all our friends. You are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends.

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Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Yes, you are worthy of all our friends. Tell rich trees and heavy jobs at the name, the name of Jesus. The risen King of righteousness He's with bow and tops could miss at the name, the name of Jesus. On His rock the church will scan, Psalms of joy will rise again at the name, the name of Jesus. Christ will reign forevermore, all the saints and angels roar at the name, the name of Jesus. What a worthy name, Jesus son of God. I lift it up, all you deserve the praise, what a worthy name, Jesus son of God. I lift it up, all you deserve on your head, the victor's crown. Tell rich trees and heavy jobs at the name, the name of Jesus. The risen King of righteousness He's with bow and tops could miss at the name, the name of Jesus. On His rock the church will scan, Psalms of joy will rise again at the name, we declare His name. Christ will reign forevermore, all the saints and angels roar at the name, the name of Jesus. At the name, the holy name, at the name, the name of Jesus. What a worthy name, Jesus son of God. I lift it up, you deserve the praise, what a worthy name, Jesus son of God. I lift it up, all you deserve the praise. Jesus, we come together to do that, to lift up your name above every other name, to lift up your name, God, above anxieties or fears that we might have come in here with, to lift

your name up, God, around the uncertainties with the future, around things we can't control and our own families, like we just lift your name up above all of it, just recognizing God that one day every knee will bow and every tongue will confess, but right now, God, it is just our joy and privilege to be able to praise your name. I pray, God, in the next few minutes, as we study your word, Jesus, we're going to be looking directly at some things you said to us in the very first sermon that was recorded for us in the Gospels, and we need some humility to receive it, because some of what you're going to challenge us with just goes against what feels natural, certainly goes against what our culture holds up, so would you convict us where we need to be, convicted, would you encourage us where we need encouragement, but may we not leave here the same way we came in? It's in your name we pray, Jesus, amen, you may be seated. The words of Jesus from Matthew 5, 3 through 12, "Blessed are the poor in spirit for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled. Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy. Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God." Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you, when people insult you and persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad because great is your reward in heaven. If you've ever gone house hunting, or maybe just wandered through a model home on a Sunday afternoon, like for no reason, you've seen the work of a professional home stager. A home stager's job, like their whole job, is to stage the house, to make an empty house look full, to look lived in, to look like the kind of place that you would want to live. So you walk into the kitchen and there's a big bowl of apples on the island. And these are like perfect apples, like nobody has ever had an apple that looks this perfect

and you pick one up and it weighs like about as much as a ping pong ball. It's not real, it's just plastic. Like the whole bowl is just a bowl of plastic apples, doesn't matter, it's plastic, like and that's true of everything in the house. You walk into the living room, there's a big flat screen on the wall, but it's actually a cardboard picture of a flat screen. There's books on the shelf, but they're not actually books, they're just decorative pieces made to look like books. There's a bottle of wine on the dining room table, it's got two glasses, but the bottle is a prop, there's no actual wine in it, it's empty. In the bathroom, there's a stack of these fluffy white towels rolled up like a spa with like a little orchid next to them, finally something real, it's a towel. They're not really, because no one will ever use those towels, like those towels are not for drying, they're for display, they're decorative towels, which if you think about it, it's like a towel that's lost, it's reason to live, like it's the whole house, it's a staged house. From the doorway, it looks great, a stage house looks great from the doorway, warm and happy and put together, but really it's empty. If the fridge is empty, the TV doesn't actually turn on, the fruit won't actually feed anybody, the bed's not even a bed, it's like two folding tables pushed together with a comforter on top of it and some pillows, it's just staged, just staged to look good. And here's the parallel that I want to make as we start this new series through the Beatitudes, a lot of us have gotten really, really good at staging our lives. Like some of us have never lived in any house other than a staged house, like you've never known anything different, and it seems to work as long as people stay in the doorway, as long as people don't get too close, and as long as everyone sticks to the script and everybody does it, it seems normal, and so somebody asks, like, how are you doing? Well, staged answer. It's great, great, everything's fine. How's your marriage?

Great. How are the kids? So great. And as long as nobody gets too close, then everybody says the same thing. It's fine, and that's the script for the blessed life, everything's fine and everybody's great, and yet somehow we are the most anxious, most lonely, most medicated, most addicted, most exhausted generation in history. How is that possible? How can everybody be great, and nobody be okay? Maybe, maybe because it's all staged. And so from the doorway it looks full, like our lives are full of strength and answers and options. We have full closets and full calendars, full Amazon cards, like from the doorway it looks full, but in reality it's fake. Maybe 10 or 12 years ago. We had a house full of teenagers. If you've ever raised a bunch of teenagers at the same time, you know. I mean, you're just trying to make it work. Some days you think you're doing okay? Other days? Yeah, not so much. But I've felt this pressure that as a pastor's family we should at least look like we've got it all together. Like when we walked into church, like we should look like the family on the brochure. And so there were certain Sunday mornings where the night before had been pretty rough in our home. Or even the car ride into church wasn't great. And we'd get ready to get out of the car and walk into church. And I'd turn around and say to my kids, "Hey kids, time to put a smile on." And then we'd come into church and I'd stand up and preach maybe about honesty or grace.

And then we'd get back in the car, nobody would say much. I'm looking back. I don't think the problem was. I think the problem was that I was teaching my kids something that I never would have said out loud. I was teaching them what matters most is how things look from the doorway. And when you walk into church, mixer the apples are in the bowl. Like I wasn't just teaching my kids to smile. I was teaching them church requires a costume change. And a lot of us learned that over the years. But what we were inheriting wasn't the gospel. What we were inheriting was more of like a staging plan. And so we just finished this series called The Kingdom is Real. The series was based on the words of Jesus from Matthew 4 verse 17, where he says, "Repent for the kingdom of heaven has come near. "It's here, it's now, it's present." But here's the thing about a kingdom. If it is real, then it has certain values like every kingdom does. And you can always tell what a kingdom values by who it calls blessed. Like if you wanna understand what a kingdom values, you see who it blesses. Like in our kingdom, like in our culture, in America, we've got a list of people we bless that tells you about values. You see it when you scroll, like blessed are the successful

and blessed are the beautiful and blessed are the funny and blessed are the competent and strong and blessed are people whose lives put together. But in Matthew 5, in the very next chapter, he's gonna sit down and give us his list. And this is the beginning of the Sermon on the Mount and it starts with these eight short statements that we call the Beatitudes. And each one of these begins with the word blessed. And I just wanna tell ya, like his list of who gets blessed is different than our list. They don't match. So that's why this series is called Flip It, because every single Beatitude takes something our world values or our world believes is like the good life and it flips it. Flips it upside down. So Matthew 5, we'll start in verse one. Jesus is teaching in the hills above the Sea of Galilee. And here's what we read. Now when Jesus saw the crowds, he went up on a mountain side and he sat down. His disciples came to him and he began to teach them. And he said, blessed are the poor in spirit for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. And blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Verse one says, when Jesus saw the crowds. Well, which crowds, like who's in the crowd? Well, if you go back a few verses to the end of chapter four,

it tells us like who's in the crowd. Matthew four, verse 24, says people brought to him all who were ill with various diseases, those suffering, severe pain, the demon possessed, those having seizures and the paralyzed. In other words, this isn't the crowd you would put in the ministry promo video. People on mats, people with chronic pain, people who've been told their whole lives by the religious system, you're unclean. It's parents holding a child who's seizing. It's people who if you saw them walking towards you on the road, you might cross to the other side, and Jesus is gonna call some people blessed. It's a hillside full of people whose lives have been unstaged by life. And in that culture, that meant something theologically. Like it meant that you were the opposite of being blessed by God. Like faith thought, if you were sick, it's because you sinned, if you were poor, it's because God wasn't happy with you. If you're grieving, it's because you did something to deserve it. And the religious leaders had taught this lie that, look, if life is hard, it meant God's not blessing you, God is against you. Now you'd think, like 2,000 years later, we'd be done with that lie. Like we'd be done with this lie that God's will

for your life is to always be comfortable and convenient. We'd be done with the lie that God's will for you is always health and wealth, that the house you live in and the car you drive and the vacations you go on. Well, that means you've been blessed by God. And I'm not saying those things can't be blessings. I mean, they may be blessings, but they may not be. Like they may be the very idols that keep you from the deeper blessings God has for you. And I'm not saying we shouldn't be thankful for those things, but I am saying we should be, we should be careful. 'Cause here's what can happen. If health is proof of God's blessing, now what are you telling the mom in the children's hospital? What are you telling the young widow at the graveside of her husband? Like if money is the proof of God's blessing, what are you telling the believer in the refugee camp who deeply loves Jesus but doesn't know where dinner's coming from? Like for that matter, what are you telling the carpenter turned rabbi. If the gospel that you've heard only seems to work in the suburbs with a staged house and a three-car garage, that's not the gospel. If it doesn't work in a cancer ward, it doesn't work. If it's not true at a funeral home, it isn't true. And in Matthew 5, Jesus climbs up on this hillside and he sits down and he looks at people who are hurting and struggling and just getting by in the first word

out of his mouth is blessed. Blessed. We think the script of a blessed life is, hey, I'm great. Everything's fine. But Jesus is going to flip the script and he's going to teach us, God's blessing comes when we finally learn to say some things that are just not easy for most of us to say. So the first thing Jesus says are, blessed are the poor in spirit. And here's what someone who is poor in spirit will say. Someone who's poor in spirit will say, I need help. I need help. So Jesus begins by saying, blessed are the poor. And some of you hear that and you're like, yes, I win. I'm broke. This is great news. Blessed are the poor. Feels like the opposites of how our world blesses or values. We equate blessing with being a rich. We use blessed and rich interchangeably. If you go to a rich person's house and you're like, this is a beautiful home, the rich person doesn't say, thanks, I'm so rich. What do they say? They say, thanks, I'm so blessed, so blessed. And it's good to give thanks to God and recognize. But you've got to be careful because we can't equate being blessed with being rich. Jesus says, blessed are the poor.

And it doesn't mean that if you're rich, you shouldn't be thankful. But you should be careful not to assume that wealth and God's blessing are synonymous. Like there are several words that Jesus could have used here for poor. But the word he uses describes a beggar. Somebody crouched on the side of the road with their hand out who not only has nothing but has no way to get anything. But Jesus doesn't just say, blessed are the poor. What do you say? Blessed are the poor in spirit. And those two words move this poverty we're talking about from a bank account to your soul. In other words, you can have a lot of money and still recognize your dependence, still recognize being poor in spirit. But being poor in spirit means you stop saying, I've got this and you start saying, I need help. There's a blessing there. I was reading this survey that asked people on the internet about their favorite Bible verse. And one of the most common verses referenced was a verse that you probably know and I don't even let you finish a form. God helps those who help themselves. Beautiful, beautiful verse that is nowhere in the Bible. Like the Bible teaches that God helps those who can't help themselves.

Those who say, I need help. That's who God blesses. Tim Keller points out that as Americans, like this poor in spirit attitude is really hard for us. Like we're much more comfortable, he says, with this idea of being middle class and spirit. And in middle class and spirit feels like we've done some stuff. Like we can handle some things. Like we don't need too much assistance. God's nice and we like him. But he's not necessary. Like we can take care of ourselves. But God's blessing is not for people who are middle class and spirit. So how do you know if you're a middle class and spirit? Well, you might be middle class and spirit if your confession sounds like a job interview where you're talking about your greatest weakness. Sometimes I work a little too hard, God. You might be middle class and spirit if when your small group asks for a prayer request and you ask them to pray for your Anthony surgery instead of the fact that your marriage is barely hanging on. Like you might be middle class and spirit if you've ever left a comment on social media piling on to somebody's public failure. You might be middle class and spirit if you take sermon notes for other people. Like you might be middle class and spirit if you want grace for your sin

but you want judgment and justice for everybody else's. Like people who are middle class and spirit almost always have a grace double standard. If it's my failure, I want God to be patient and I want people to hear the whole story. I want people to remember all the good things I've done and assume the best. But if it's somebody else's failure, well, I want details and I want a timeline and I want consequences and I want them to be exposed. So can I just say this just as a church? At some point and maybe sooner than you think you're gonna hear about it. maybe in the comment section. And in that moment, you'll be at an intersection. And the middle-class spirit, it'll forward it, speculate, want to talk about it with other people. They'll screenshot someone's worst moment to feel better about themselves, kind of build a platform on somebody else's rubble so that they can stand on it and look good. But the poor in spirit will grieve, and they'll pray, and they'll resist gossip, and they'll remember the people closest to that are hurting, maybe more than they can imagine. They'll assume that there's probably a lot more to the story that they never got to hear, a lot more hurting. Maybe they will never understand. If I'm pouring spirit, I will remember the simple truth. I am the worst sinner I know. And my only hope was, and is, the undeserved and unearned grace of Jesus. Middle class and spirit is the stage house, where we constantly say, "I'm fine," and everything's fine. And let me just tell you that I'm fine can be the most spiritually dangerous lie that you believe, because being rescued is not for people who say, "I'm fine." Last week, Desiree and I were enjoying a quiet night at home as empty nesters when we got a call from our oldest daughter. She was in Florida with her husband and kids, and her neighbor had called her to tell her that the four horses that she keeps on her property had got in the house, and they were walking down the street at night. I tell my wife and I hop in the car, and we speed over to her house. We get there. We find where the horses broke through the fence. We don't see any horses. We cross the streets, and we're

walking through people's yards in the dark. We've got feed buckets and halters, and we're calling for horses to try and act like this is, everything's fine. It's something we like to do on an evening. Everything's fine. But as we're doing it, one of the neighbors yells from their back porch, "Hey, did you lose a dog?" And I'm like, "We lost a horse. Four horses, actually." And the neighbor yells back, "Do you need some help?" And instinctively, I was about to give the answer I always give. We're good. Nothing to see here. Everything's fine. That's my default script. Keep it staged. We got it covered. Put a smile on. Before I could say it, my wife answered and said, "That would be great. We could use some help." And I was embarrassed. I pulled my ball cap down lower, hoping nobody's going to recognize it. Two minutes later, one of the neighbors says, "Are you Kyle from Southeast?" Yeah, you're going to be in a sermon illustration. And before long a search party's formed, there's like six neighbors with their flashlights or their phone lights walking through the dark with us, calling for these horses. And after we got the four horses secured, my wife and I were driving home, and she said, "I don't think we could have done this by ourselves." So there was a point in that story where we came to a poor-in-spirit intersection. We needed help. My middle-class spirit was ready to turn it down. I don't need help. My instinct was to just keep the apples in the bowl even at night, even when we're walking through people's backyard, looking for four horses. It's fine. We're fine. But my wife said, "That would be great. We need some help." And the moment she said it, we were met with a blessing. And I believe that some of you are at that intersection in your life like right now. Like God is asking you, "Hey, looks like you could use some help. Do you need some help?" And your instinct and your habit of saying, "No, I'm good. Everything's fine. I got this." But Jesus says, "Blessed are those who say, 'That would be great. I could really use some help.'" And so this blessing, it's not connected to a polished prayer or to a staged life. So my challenge to you this week is to pick one area of your life where you've been saying, "I'm good and it's fine." And instead, you say to God into one trusted person, "I need some help." Like pick one area. Maybe it's your marriage or finances or drinking. Maybe it's anxiety or loneliness or it's a child or screen habits. But just say to God in one person, "Can I be honest with you? I need some help." And the moment you do, a blessing is unlocked. The second beatitude here, Matthew chapter 5. It's verse 4. Jesus says, "Blessed are those who mourn." So this is the second thing people will say

to receive a blessing. They'll say, I'm not okay. I'm not okay. If you think blessed are the poor sound strange, I mean, this sounds even stranger, really, because the word blessed can also be translated as happy. So when Jesus says blessed are those who mourn, it sounds like he's saying happy are the sad. And Jesus uses a word here for mourn, that it's the strongest word in the Greek language for grief. He uses this word for like overwhelming sadness. It's a word that has weight to it. And it's the kind of grief that pushes you, like you have to sit down on the floor. And so when you're sad, Jesus doesn't tell you, hey, hurry up and get over it. He doesn't say, hey, if you were super spiritual, you wouldn't feel so heartbroken. And so at the very least blessed are those who mourn. It's permission to grieve that you can be spiritual and you can be sad. But when sadness knocks on the door, like our instinct is to just refuse it, like we try to numb our sadness. And so instead of mourning, we just, we manage it, we medicate it, we try to scroll past it, we stay busy so we don't have to feel it. And sometimes I just think in church, we can be the worst at it, just put the smile on. And Jesus says, actually, there's a blessing for you when you mourn.

Well, if you refuse to mourn, there's some opposite of blessings that come. Like when we refuse to mourn, one thing that happens to us is like sadness, like that isn't mourned, it leaks outside ways. And usually it comes out as anger. Sadness feels too vulnerable. And so it's just easier to be mad. About six months after COVID had died down, there was a family that I care a lot about who decided they were leaving the church. And they had been a part of this church for a long time, a part of our lives, since we first moved here. And I didn't hear from them that they were leaving. I found out from somebody else, and they were leaving because they didn't agree with the decision or some direction. And a few days later, I was venting about it to a mentor friend of mine who lives out of state. And he stopped me in the middle of my rant. He said, "You sound really mad about this." I said, "Yeah, I am mad." He said, "I don't think you are. "I don't think you're mad. "I think you're sad." And that made me so mad. (audience laughing) But he was right. Like, I wasn't mad. I was sad.

And I was sad 'cause these are our friends. And it felt like rejection. And I was sad because I knew that I could have done better. And there's things I wish I would have do over. Maybe then I would have stayed. And here's the strange thing that happened when I went from being mad to being sad. When I was sad, I was comforted. See, here's what anger does. Anger puts up walls and keeps other people out. Sadness has a way of tearing walls down and inviting people in, and inviting God in with grace, with comfort. Secondly, when we refuse to mourn, it teaches the people around you to live these staged lives. Like, one of the hard things for me to see is that for a long time, and I think I still struggle with it, I was afraid of my sadness. But I was also afraid of my wife's sadness. I afraid of my kid's sadness. Like, when someone I love is sad, I feel like weirdly responsible for it. And I immediately want to fix it, to tell them how they should feel, to reframe it for them. And I might mean it to be helpful, but what they hear is, there's something wrong with you for feeling sad. And as a result of that,

some of the people closest to me over the years have concluded it's not okay to be sad around Kyle. And that is really hard for me to say out loud. Like, my fear of sadness taught the people I love the most, you need to set some plastic apples out. One more. When we refuse to mourn, it numbs everything else too. Bernay Brown talks about this. Like, you can't numb just one emotion. You can't just selectively numb, she says. Like, if you numb the pain, if you numb the sadness, you end up also numbing the joy, the wall you put up to keep the sadness out, keeps out everything else too. And so Jesus says, "Blessed are you, bless are you." When you stop saying everything's fine, and you start saying, "I'm sad." And so what I wanna invite you to do this week is just to finish this simple sentence. "I'm sad about." Not, "I'm frustrated." You'll be tempted to say, "I'm frustrated with," or, "I'm stressed out because." "I'm not okay." And Jesus says, "When you do that, there's a blessing. And the blessing he promises, when you're vulnerable enough to be set, the blessing he promises is that you'll be comforted." And the Greek word for comforted comes from the same root as the word that Jesus uses in John 14 for the Holy Spirit, same word, comforter, the one who draws up alongside, same root word.

And so the point would be here is that Jesus promises a blessing and it's not a greeting card and it's not a feeling, it's a person. And you say, "I'm not okay." And he comes and he stands beside you and he sits down with you and he says, "I'm here." And so don't miss this, like the blessing is his presence in sadness. Like when you're really hurting, you don't need an explanation, you don't need somebody in the funeral home coming in and leaning in and saying, "Hey, everything happens for a reason." Like you just need somebody there, you just need presence. And this is a good news of the gospel, that God doesn't send a card or a casserole. He sends himself, he sends his own presence. He comes himself to the hospital waiting room at 3 a.m. And he comes to the apartment, like when you walk in alone and the silence just feels so loud. Like he comes to the kitchen table where the bills are spread out and the math doesn't work and he comes to the empty side of the bed. Like David said in Psalm 34, 18, like the Lord is close to the brokenhearted. Not the Lord is close to the put together. Not the Lord is close to those who have it all figured out. Not the Lord is close to those who have staged houses. He doesn't like living in staged houses. And so let me tell you, like what you don't have to do to receive this blessing of God's presence is you don't have to be okay. You don't have to clean things up. You don't have to get the house organized and picked up. Like what invites his presence is this vulnerable, this humble willingness to say, "I'm not okay." And in your emptiness, here's what happens. God gives you the blessing of his presence. Or let me put it this way, your empty place becomes God's entry place. Like your empty place can become his entry place in your life. That the emptier you are, the more space there is for God's blessing in your life. So what's it look like to live this way? Well, it's not usually one big dramatic moment. It's a bunch of little intersections, like moments where you can keep the apples in the bowl or you can start to empty it. And so you're in the lobby on a Sunday morning and somebody says, "How are you?" And the script says that you should say, "Great. Everything's great." But what if this time you said, "Honestly, I'm struggling and I could use some prayer." Or a friend finds out what you've been going through and says, "Hey, can we stop by and say hi? We just want to check in on you." The script says that you should say, "No, we're good. We're fine. You don't need to do that." But what if you said this time? That would actually mean a lot to me. I could use some help. Your spouse says, "You don't seem yourself lately. You're always in a bad mood." The script tells you to act defensive to say, "I'm fine." But this time, what would happen if you got honest

enough and courageous enough and humble enough to say, "I know I've been acting mad, but honestly, I think maybe I'm sad." And then you name it. Your child comes to you, heartbroken, everything, and he wants to fix it and to reframe it, tell them how they should feel. But what if he just sat down next to them and said, "It's really hard. I'm here." And then there's that thing that you've been carrying. I don't know. You're drinking your marriage, your anxiety, your porn struggle. And the script says, "Keep telling yourself, I got it. Just keep apples in the bowl. Don't let anybody know. Keep the house staged. But what if this week you said to one person, "Can I be honest with you? I need some help with this." And you finally get rid of all the staged stuff and you're left with an empty space. And when you do, God moves in. You've got space for God's blessing in your life. And so this is my prayer for us as a church, that this wouldn't be a staged church. Like what would it look like if that were true, if this was an unstaged church? Like can you imagine? Imagine a church where nobody has to stage, where we don't pretend or perform. We're successful people. We can admit that they're struggling. We're grieving people, aren't rushed or fixed, or quoted at that they're loved and they're surrounded. rumors, we celebrate repentance, like the kind of church, an on-stage church like that. It would just look so different from the world, that I had to think too often we don't look any different, like the world looks the stage, but there may be no more stage place on earth than a church lobby on a Sunday morning. Like, we are supposed to be the one place on earth where you can say, "I need help," and you get six flashlights instead of six opinions, where you can say, "I'm not okay," and it doesn't end a conversation, but it starts one. I told you earlier about the church parking lot 10 years ago, a car full of teenagers, Sunday morning, me saying, "Kids, time to put a smile on." If I could go back to that parking lot, I'd say something different. I'd turn around in my seat, and I'd look at my kids, and I'd say, "Hey, we don't have to pretend in there. This is the one place it's okay not to be okay, and if today's hard, it's okay to say it's hard. That's what church is for.

That's who Jesus blesses. That's who this church blesses. But if I'm honest, I still wouldn't say it. That still doesn't feel safe to me. I'm not there yet, but I hope we can take some steps closer to it this weekend, so here's how I want to end our time together. Take your hands, like all of you, right where you are, and just being close your eyes, everybody close your eyes, and make fists with your hands. Just make fists. Everybody make fists. I'm not going to ask you to do anything weird. It's fine. Hold them tight, and this is how most of us are walking through life. Just holding on tight to our image, to our control, to our picture of success, to our staged lives, and the thing about a close fist is it's hard for people to take anything from it, but you can't really put anything in it either. So as I pray, here's what I want to ask you to do. If you're ready to stop staging, I just want you to slowly open your hands, palms up, let them be empty. As a way to tell God with your hands, what's true in your heart, God, here's my emptiness. Would you fill it? I need help. I'm not okay. Give me your presence. Father, we confess that we've gotten good at staging. Like we know how to make things look good from the doorway. We know the right lines, "Hey, everything's good, it's fine," but we're tired, we're tired of staging and tired of performing. And so God right now, we just open our hands, and for some of us, we're saying, "I need help."

Like we've been telling people, "Everything's good for years, but it's not good." So would you give us the courage to be poor in spirit? And for some of us, as we open our hands, we're saying, "I'm not okay." Like we've been carrying something, maybe some grief that we've never let ourselves feel, maybe some regrets that we won't admit. Would you just sit on the floor with us here, Lord? Would you be our comforter? I pray that our empty place would become an entry place for you. That Lord, would you give us the humility and the courage to get rid of the fake stuff, to make room, to invite you in, you don't want to move in to a staged home? And so Lord, I pray that today we would experience your blessing, that your blessing is for those who are poor in spirit, those who say, "I need help," and your blessing is for those who mourn, those who say, "I'm not okay." God, may this please be a church where people experience your blessing because it's okay to say those things. It's in Jesus' name we pray. Amen. We're going to have a few minutes here to take communion. And as we take communion, it's a great opportunity for us just to do what we talked about, just open up our hands, and to ask God for His help to recognize that Jesus on the cross made a way for us to be rescued, but being rescued isn't for people who say, "Hey, I'm fine. It's been a great week. Nothing I need to confess, nothing I need to repent of. My way's working good." Rescue's not for you. Rescue's for the person who says, "I'm broken. I need help. Please forgive me." So we want to take some time to do that, not as a way to feel shame and guilt, but as a way to experience freedom and to experience God's presence.

So we're going to take communion together, and then we're going to worship some. And as we worship, I just want to invite you to kind of hold the posture we had during prayer, just as we worship, just to worship with your hands out, palms up. This is a way to say, God, would you please come in today? your blessing. And so as we worship, it's a great opportunity to just put these beatitudes into practice. Blessed are the poor in spirit. Blessed are those who mourn. Let's take a few minutes, take communion, and then we'll worship together. (audience applauding) (gentle piano music) (gentle piano music) (gentle piano music) (gentle piano music) (gentle piano music) (gentle piano music) (gentle piano music) This is the end I breathe. (gentle piano music) This is the end I breathe. (gentle piano music) Your holy presence, living in me. (gentle piano music) This is my daily prayer. (gentle piano music) This is my daily prayer. (gentle piano music) Your very world, spoken to me.

(gentle piano music) In love, I'm desperate for you. (gentle piano music) In love, I'm lost without you. (gentle piano music) This is the end I breathe. (gentle piano music) This is the end I breathe. (gentle piano music) Your holy presence, living in me. (gentle piano music) This is my daily prayer. (gentle piano music) This is my daily prayer. (gentle piano music) Your very world, spoken to me. (gentle piano music) In love, I'm desperate for you. (gentle piano music) In love, I'm lost without you. (gentle piano music) In love, I'm desperate for you. (gentle piano music) In love, I'm lost without you. (gentle piano music) I'm lost without you. (gentle piano music) In love, I'm lost without you. (gentle piano music)

We are desperate for you. (gentle piano music) (gentle piano music) In love. ♪ In the light ♪ ♪ I'm lost without you ♪ ♪ I'm lost without you ♪ ♪ I'm lost without you ♪ [audience applauding] ♪ I'm lost without you ♪ ♪ I'm lost without you ♪ ♪ No longer I am a man ♪ ♪ But Christ in me ♪ ♪ For I've been born again ♪ ♪ My heart is free ♪ ♪ The hope of heaven before me ♪ ♪ The grave behind ♪ ♪ Hallelujah ♪ ♪ You brought me back to life ♪ ♪ I won't forget the moment ♪ ♪ I heard you call my name ♪ ♪ And the grief of darkness ♪ ♪ Into the light of grace ♪ ♪ Just like Lazarus ♪ ♪ Oh, you brought me back to life ♪ ♪ Where there was dead religion ♪ ♪ Now there is a living faith ♪ ♪ All of my hope and freedom ♪ ♪ Are found in Jesus' name ♪ ♪ Just like Lazarus ♪

♪ Oh, you brought me back to life ♪ ♪ No longer I am a man ♪ ♪ But Christ in me ♪ ♪ For I've been born again ♪ ♪ My heart is free ♪ ♪ The hope of heaven before me ♪ ♪ The grave behind ♪ ♪ Hallelujah ♪ ♪ You brought me back to life ♪ ♪ Some things as I can see ♪ ♪ I'll point to the price you pay ♪ ♪ Some things as I'm no worthy ♪ ♪ I'll point to that empty grave ♪ ♪ Just like Lazarus ♪ ♪ Oh, you brought me back to life ♪ ♪ No longer I am a man ♪ ♪ But Christ in me ♪ ♪ For I've been born again ♪ ♪ My heart is free ♪ ♪ The hope of heaven before me ♪ ♪ The grave behind ♪ ♪ Hallelujah ♪ ♪ You brought me back to life ♪ ♪ Can I begin to thank you ♪ ♪ For all that you've done for me ♪ ♪ Jesus to fully praise you ♪ ♪ It will take all eternity ♪ Just like Lazarus, oh, you brought me back to life. You brought me back to life. You brought me back to life.

If you brought me back to life, don't love me right. We will live, but Christ in me, for our people will love again. Our heart is free, the hope of heaven before me. The brave behind, how they knew you, you brought me back. You're no longer right to live, but Christ in me, for our people will love again. Our heart is free, the hope of heaven before me. The brave behind, how they knew you, you brought me back. - Well, Pando family, a verse that I would love for you to think about on top of this message this week is that God's power is made perfect in our weakness. God's power is made perfect in our weakness. And I know that listening to a message like this is never fun, right? Because it's not one of those messages that you kind of can just gloss over the things that you're dealing with on the inside and just treat it as any other conversation or any other message. This is one of those messages that kind of makes you peel back a couple of layers of man, like, do I actually, like, do I need help, right? Am I afraid to ask for self for help? Am I okay? And if you're not okay, what I wanna encourage you with is that you're not alone. You're not alone. I think for so many of us, we try to live our lives through this lens of like setting up a house that's being sold, right? With a bunch of, like, fake fruit and books

and all this type of stuff. And what we realize is that, man, like, if you were to walk into my house today, you wouldn't see that, right? You would see kids stuff scattered everywhere. You'd see dishes that haven't been washed. And what I mean by that is that all of us are dealing with things on the inside that we need to process through. We need to talk about, and so maybe for you this week, it's to write down that phrase that Kyle encourages us to talk about, of I am sad about whatever that is, and name it. And name it. And if you don't have Christian community around you, maybe if you don't know the person who's the chaplain in your prison that's helping with faith and walking with Jesus, then I would encourage you to write us. We talked about this before service today, but I would always encourage you to write us here at Southeast. You can talk to us about what you're sad about, right? What you're struggling with. Because when you do that, guys, if there's anything, I will promise you it's this. We will always be faithful to pray for you when you write us. And so even if you have no one else in the world who will be faithful to do that for you, I promise you that we will be that for you.

Y'all, so again, I don't know about you, but that was a message that deeply encouraged me and impacted me this weekend, and I hope it did the same for you as well. And if you're looking for a deeper dive on the things that we talk about on Sundays, whether it's Kyle or one of our other pastors that walk us through a sermon, and you have some questions about, man, what does that mean for my life? How do I apply that where I'm at right now? Well, then I would invite you to watch our Pando exclusive podcast every single Thursday that it drops on Pando. We do our best to talk about that exact thing to help you follow Jesus, exactly where you are at in your life today. Y'all, but before we head out, I wanted to just offer a prayer. Because again, I know that this is a message that can pull on those heartstrings. It can pull back a couple of those layers of ourself where we have to dive in. And so before we head out, let me pray for each of us. Father in heaven, I ask that today that you would specifically be with the person, and even the group of people that I hope is there listening and watching this, that is raising their hand saying,

"I am not okay, that I am hurting, that I need help, "and that they would feel comfortable "and have courage to reach out. "They would feel comfortable with other Christians "around them if they have them, with their chaplain, "or even if it's sending a letter, "having the courage to do that "so that we could pray over them and over their life. "God, I pray that you would be with those "who are hurting in mourning today "so that they will find the blessing and the gift "of your spirit being with them. "Lord, we love you, and it's in your name, we pray. "Hey, ma'am." Well, Pando family, we love you. We hope you have a great week, and we will see you next time. (crowd cheering) (crowd cheering) (crowd cheering) (crowd cheering) You