Empty Chairs: When the family breaks | Tyrone D. Jones | Seat At The Table | Full Service

Hey, good morning, Church of the City. Good morning, Church of the City. Hey, come on. We're alive, we're doing good. Come on, turn to your neighbor and tell him, I'm glad you made it to church today. Come on, tell him. This is a holy service. This is the one where we got more sleep, we got some breakfast, and we're ready to roll. Amen. Man, what a great two services we had, and what a great one we'll have this third one. Man, God is doing something in our city, and in this church in particular. And if it's your first time coming to church for the city, or maybe just to a church in general, we want you to get plugged in. We want you to get connected. Amen, and there's several ways you can do that. There's a disc in front of your chair that you can tap that disc. There's also a connect table, and if you're watching this online, you can fill out that digital connect card. But whatever that is, we're just so happy that you are in God's house today. Amen. How many of you guys are happy to be in God's house today? Amen.

And before we read scripture, because it's just a custom of the house to just start off the service with reading the word of God, if you have not grabbed Pastor Tyrone's book, Gripped by Hope, there are some amazing staff out there, out in the lobby. You can purchase a book and take a copy home with you, and I guarantee you, you'll be blessed, amen? Today's verse is found in the book of Romans, chapter 10, verse 18, verse 13, sorry, Romans chapter 10, verse 13. And it says like this, for everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved, amen? I just want to encourage you this morning and for the rest of our lives, church, to just speak Jesus, amen? Speak Jesus over our situation, speak Jesus over our circumstance, speak Jesus over whatever we're going through, speak Jesus over our emotions, our feelings, over our city, over our church, over the person next to us. Let's just speak Jesus wherever we go, amen? Things happen when we mention the name of Jesus. So right there where you're at, why don't you bow your head with me and close your eyes as we pray to begin. Jesus, we are just so grateful. We're so thankful to be in your house.

Thank you so much because I could be surrounded by a family and a community that loves me, that wants the best for me, but more than that, I have a God who just pursues me every single day of my life. God, I thank you for another morning you've given me, another Sunday you've given me. God, I don't wanna go back home the same today. I wanna leave transformed, I wanna leave different. God, I put my circumstance and everything that I'm feeling or going through in your hands today. God, open my heart, open my mind to receive what you have for me this morning. And God, let me understand that it's only through you that all things are possible. In Jesus' name we pray. And all the church for the city says, amen. Come on, church, let's worship. ♪ I just wanna speak the name of Jesus ♪ ♪ Over every heart and every mind ♪ ♪ Cause I know there is peace within your presence ♪ ♪ I speak Jesus ♪ ♪ Cause I just wanna speak the name of Jesus ♪ ♪ Till every dark addiction starts to break ♪ ♪ Declaring there is hope and there is freedom ♪ ♪ I speak Jesus ♪ Your name is power, Your name is healing, Your name is love Break every stronghold, Shine through the shadows, Burn like a fire I just wanna speak the name of Jesus, Over fear and all anxiety To every soul held captive by depression, I speak Jesus

I just wanna speak the name of Jesus, Over fear and all anxiety To every soul held captive by depression, I speak Jesus Your name is power, Your name is healing, Your name is love Break every stronghold, Shine through the shadows, Burn like a fire Your name is power, Your name is healing, Your name is love Break every stronghold, Shine through the shadows, Burn like a fire Shout Jesus from the mountains, Jesus in the streets Jesus in the darkness, Lord, for every enemy Jesus for my family, I speak the holy name, Jesus Shout Jesus from the mountains, Jesus in the streets Jesus in the darkness, Lord, for every enemy Jesus for my family, I speak the holy name, Jesus Shout Jesus from the mountains, Jesus in the streets Jesus in the darkness, Lord, for every enemy Jesus for my family, I speak the holy name, Jesus Your name is power, Your name is healing, Your name is love Break every stronghold, Shine through the shadows, Burn like a fire Your name is power, Your name is healing, Your name is love Break every stronghold, Shine through the shadows, Burn like a fire I just wanna speak the name of Jesus Over every heart and every mind Cause I know there is peace within Your presence I speak Jesus Speak Your mighty name, I speak Jesus I speak Jesus I speak Jesus Oh, I speak Jesus Oh For the different ways we see you For all the ways you move

All the colors and expressions Oh, the beauty of your truth What a masterful reflection When we are unified Truly celebrate each other Echo of our pride That you would have A spotless bride Praise the Father Praise the Son Holy Spirit Make us one Every nation Tribe and tongue This is our crime Your kingdom come You surrender our agendas Our preferences, our plans Would you have us work together To be your feet and hands Our heart is just a norm To show who you are But the gospel's still the answer For every searching heart Oh, praise the Father Praise the Son Holy Spirit Make us one Every nation Tribe and tongue

This is our crime Your kingdom come Brothers and sisters Under the banner of your name Mothers and fathers Under the banner of your name All for the glory of your name Brothers and sisters Under the banner of your name Mothers and fathers Under the banner of your name All your children All for the glory of your name Brothers and sisters Under the banner of your name Mothers and fathers Under the banner of your name All your children All for the glory of your name So we praise the Father Praise the Son Holy Spirit Make us one From every nation Tribe and tongue This is our crime Your kingdom come So we praise the Father Praise the Son Holy Spirit

Come and make us one From every nation Tribe and tongue This is our crime Your kingdom come We sing brothers Brothers and sisters Under the banner of your name Brothers and fathers Under the banner of your name Under the banner of your name, we're all your children All for the glory of your name Brothers and sisters Under the banner of your name Mothers and fathers Under the banner of your name, we're all your children All for the glory of your name I am an instrument of exaltation I was born to lift the name above You hear the melody of all creation But there's a song of praise that only I can sing Who else is worthy? Who else is worthy? There is no one, only you Jesus Who else is worthy? Who else is worthy? There is no one, only you Jesus You are the instrument, God of the angels Yet you chose to make my heart your dwelling You healed my brokenness, showed me your glory

Now I have songs of thanks, not even angels sing Who else is worthy? Who else is worthy? There is no one, only you Jesus Who else is worthy? There is no one, only you Jesus Who else is worthy? Who else is worthy? There is no one, only you Jesus Who else is worthy? Who else is worthy? There is no one, only you Jesus My name is Angela. Before giving my life to Jesus, I felt lost. I was a non-believer and lived life the way I pleased. I didn't give much thought to faith or belief in God. I knew I wanted to change, but I didn't have anyone to help me. My daughter was diagnosed with cerebral palsy. It has been a difficult couple of years for my family. I remember crying out to God, asking Him why did He do this to her? And was it to punish me for my sins? God spoke to me and told me that He was here, and I never turned His back on me. He said that I no longer had to endure the emotional pain I was feeling, and to have faith in Him. At that moment, I truly surrendered my life to Jesus. Since giving my life to Jesus, everything is better. I have less stress, and everything is more manageable. I have supportive friends and family members since opening up about my daughter and her health challenges. She is thriving. I see how attending church has helped my family thrive both emotionally and in faith. I have faith that I am no longer alone in this world, and I can turn to God now when life gets hard and challenging. Today, I am going public with my faith.

Angela, Jesus said every disciple should be baptized in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. And because of your confession of faith, today I baptize you in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ for the remission of your sins, and according to Scripture, you shall receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. God anointed one, who was and is and is to come, seated on the throne above, holy, holy Righteous one who shed his blood to prove to us the father's love, Jesus Christ be lifted up, holy, holy Lamb of God anointed one, who was and is and is to come, seated on the throne above, holy, holy Righteous one who shed his blood to prove to us the father's love, Jesus Christ be lifted up Who else is worthy? Who else is worthy? There is no one, only you Jesus Who else is worthy? Who else is worthy? There is no one, only you Jesus There is no one, only you Jesus There is no one, only you Jesus Who else is worthy? Who else is worthy? There is no one, only you Jesus Who else is worthy? Who else is worthy? There is no one, only you Jesus There is no one, only you Jesus There is no one, only you Jesus There is no one, only you Jesus There is no one, only you Jesus There is no one, only you Jesus There is no one, only you Jesus Are you blessed to be in church today? Have you experienced the presence of God this morning already? Both of you, that's great. Just such an honor and privilege. If we haven't met, my name is Tyrone. It's an honor and privilege to worship with you today. I've been telling the people in the earlier services what a sign of faithfulness and maturity that right here in the dead middle of the summer you're here in the house of God with San Diego being so close, but you're here worshiping, experiencing Jesus. People are listening to this on their way back from vacation like, I knew it. But it is, it's an honor. I want to, I want to share just a couple things briefly before we dive into the word today. Our pastor, our lead pastor and V are traveling. They are in Idaho doing ministry. I'm so grateful that they get to get that time together with friends and, and also get to minister. But coming up this week we have an opportunity that many of us have really enjoyed over this past year. How many of you guys have been to a first Wednesday? Raise your hand if you've been to a first Wednesday. Good. More and more people from the church are attending those. They're once a month, 6 p.m. on the first Wednesday. We always

have a guest. This, this time is going to be Pastor Doug Sherman. It really truly is just an opportunity. to pack the place in, and we just have a time in the Holy Spirit, we have powerful worship, times of prayer opportunities to respond, times of prophetic movement. It truly is just an opportunity for us to live out more of the expression of our understanding of the Holy Spirit, and just an opportunity to be revived and refreshed in the Spirit, and just to worship alongside our brothers and sisters. So if you're available, there's no sign-ups, there's no registration, there's childcare for up to third grade, please come to First Wednesday on July 1st. Also, you should have received an invite card. Today is the last day of our Seat at the Table series, which is about families, and next week, we're gonna go into a series called Building the House, and it's gonna be about the church. And so if you receive that invite card, please remember that's not just a book holder in your Bible, or a placeholder, or something that fills up your middle console in your car. Give that to somebody, invite them. If the church has been a blessing to you, let's believe it'll be a blessing to them. And so we'll invite them, and of course, as usual, we're so thankful for your generosity.

We're thankful that you're a generous church, a giving church. Here's the thing. It was said, I believe, last week or the week before, God doesn't need your money, but the church does, but I think the beautiful part of that statement is you get to see your giving in action. The Bible talks about time, talent, and treasure, and the fact that you give of those, and one of the greatest expressions that I saw was last week with our kids' summer jam. It was incredible. It was something that really was an experience. It was the best. We used to have what we call VBS, or VBX, and now we have our kids' summer jam, and it was the best I've ever experienced in all my years here at this church, and I'm really grateful for Jolene, and Eli, and Naya, and all that team for putting that on. Hundreds and hundreds, I mean, hundreds of kids gathered in this room, worshiping, giving their life to Jesus. If you don't receive the CTC emails, you're gonna wanna get those. You're gonna wanna stop at the Connect table, make sure you get those, because we're gonna be sending out the recaps and different things through the emails and putting them on our social media,

so you wanna be able to see that. Also, speaking of generosity, speaking of giving, an opportunity is coming for you to be a part of what we do, even in a tangible way. For those of you who've never heard of our Serve Day, we're gonna show you a recap of last year's Serve Day in order for you to understand what you can be a part of. Come here on June, July 11th. Let's watch that. When you come to CTC, you're gonna experience great worship, and you're gonna hear a gospel message that transforms people's life. We're gonna do our very, very best to help people that are far from God find life in Christ. Along with that, you're gonna know that what is part of our DNA, deeply rooted in our culture, is us loving our city. We love those who protect us. We love those who serve us in restaurants. We love those who teach our children. We love the various agencies that are doing things in our community that helps the welfare of people's lives. We love the city that we live in, and we want the best for our community. And when we do Serve Day, it's our opportunity to go back into the public outside of the four walls and let these people know we truly do care about them,

whether they attend CTC or not. When we pay for somebody's gas, when we pay for their groceries, when we send teams of people to help some of our local community agencies, when we're painting a teacher's lounge, these are things that let people know we truly do care. So when you participate in Serve Day, you're part of what Christ has given us to do in our community. We do it because we love Jesus. We love the people in our city, and we want the people in our city to know the same Jesus who has loved us. And so Serve Day is all about that, serving our city, loving our city, and those who do things in our community that Christ may be exalted. All right, so Serve Day is July 11th. I would recommend that you sign up fast. There are 400 Serve spots available for that. They will fill up, and they will fill up fast. You can sign up for that by tapping the disc in front of you. You can go to the CTC website. If you need help navigating through it, you can go to the Connect table, but that's gonna fill up. And of course, we use that as an evangelistic opportunity as well

to invite people to our Summer Fun Day, which you'll hear more about that. And so a lot of exciting things going on, a lot of things that not that you can just be a consumer of, but have an opportunity to be a part of, to be the people that are actually joining into the vision and not just receiving from the vision. And of course, we're grateful for your giving. If you don't know how to give, there's ways to give tapping the disc. There's offering boxes at every exit. And so we're grateful for that. But I wanna pray, and then we're gonna dive into the rest of this service. So Lord, we're thankful. We're thankful, Lord, that you are a God. that encounters us you're a god that actually draws us to your house you draw us to you and so that we can encounter you we're thankful god that with each thing that we do with each activity with with each endeavor with each part of the vision god we're thankful that you are the one who gives us wisdom you're the one who gives us direction so we when we celebrate what you you've done we're celebrating you when we celebrate the opportunities that we have we're celebrating you so we're thankful god also just the idea that we can we can worship you in spirit and in truth and in freedom god with all of the shootings and earthquakes and all of the different things going on in our in our world and that we see in the news the fact that we can gather here in peace gather here in spirit and in truth gather here in comfort gather here worshiping you without fear we're thankful protect those lord that are that are dealing with those different things that are under attack for all of those different reasons god we we pray your protection we pray your grace thank you lord for our pastor for lady v please continue to keep them safe help them to minister in a powerful way and enjoy each other's company enjoy the company of the friends and family that they're gathered with there in idaho lord as we move forward with our service as we prepare for

serve day and all the things we ask god that you order our steps we ask lord that you continue to be the the voice the guide the director of all the things that we do as a church body it's all for you it's all to you and we give you the glory and honor and praise in jesus name amen all right if you don't mind standing to your feet i'm going to read one verse one verse as we come to a close in this series the family series john chapter 16 john chapter 16 verse 33 i'm going to read if you've if you ever read the gospel of john god it's 21 chapters and we're getting towards the end of it and so jesus has already lived out his life here on earth he's done numerous miracles now he's talking to his disciples about what life's going to look like when he ascends to heaven what life's going to look like when the holy spirit descends what what's next he's giving them next steps and then this is the last verse before chapter 17 and if you've never read john chapter 17 it's a fun read because it's it's actually just a prayer john chapter 17 is a prayer so you get to hear jesus talking to the father which is like we have this opportunity to eavesdrop on on jesus's prayer life in the moment and so i'm going to read this final verse in john chapter 16 verse 33 and it says this i have said these things to you that in me you may have peace in the world you will have tribulation but take heart i have overcome the world lord we thank you that you are victorious we're thankful that your word is alive that your word is for us and that your word can transform us to becoming more and more like you we pray this in jesus's name amen you can have your seats and so if you haven't been there for the last for been here for the last three weeks we've been in this family series called a seat at the table and we've approached it from a number of different different perspectives infused week one was foundations talked about seven foundations of building a strong family seven foundations that you can almost use as family values to keep your family stable and strong and unwavering as you navigate through the things of life and week two it was about marriage and we had an incredible marriage panel matter of fact we had different panels for every service and we heard about the the highs and lows of marriage and the fact that if jesus isn't the center of your marriage your marriage doesn't stand a chance to be honest and and even the fact that we have to die to ourselves because a true marriage a biblical marriage is when two become one and then last week we heard about parenting and then uh really truthfully that the that the main message the main thought of that parenting sermon was about the fact that if you are a parent you have to take ownership of the discipleship of your kids um it's great to bring them to church every week

it's great to choose their schools and choose their friends and and to do your best to help them navigate relationships but there's nothing more important than a steady understanding that you carry the responsibility of not only introducing them to jesus but walking them through that journey with him teaching them how to love the word read the word and worship and we can't teach our children things that we don't know for ourselves we can't uh a lot of times you hear that phrase that you you you your kids are people who follow you they hear what what you say but they replicate who you are and so what we're doing our best to do is navigate our students our kids through these discipleship processes and now today i'm taking this last week to address a a topic that may be a bit heavier, it may be a bit of a challenge, but it affects probably more of the room than we would ever want to admit. And it starts off with some statistics. The first number I wanna share with you is that every year in the United States, there are 627,000 divorces. 627,000 divorces every single year. Remember, that's not addressing separations, that's not addressing the breakups of people who were never married. We're talking about official divorces that were filed over done with, 627,000. Another number that I think is important to recognize in the light of this message is that in the United States, based on the CDC's mortality reports, three million people die in the United States every year. Three million are being put in the grave, which means every year, three million, some people losing their father, some people losing their mother, some people losing a sibling,

some people losing their aunt, their uncle. Three million per year. Another interesting number, a study put on by Cornell University, they did a study that says one in four people in the United States are estranged from a family member, an immediate family member. Estranged meaning you may have their phone number, you may possibly see them on holidays, but you have no form of a covenant or strong relationship with them at all. Estranged, estranged from a parent, estranged from a sibling. One in four. The last statistic I'll share with you just to build this framework, 5% of the United States is widowed, meaning a person who's made a decision to marry someone and love them and to have and to hold and all the things has had to walk through the trauma of seeing them lose their life and eventually being put in the grave. 5%. We don't talk too much about numbers and attendance here at the church, but if we have a church of around 2,000, that means that there, give or take, are about 100 widows right here in CTC. All of that to say that when Jesus said

in John chapter 16, verse 33, in this world, you will have trials and tribulation, it's no surprise that he didn't leave that out there as a possibility and a suggestion. He said, you will have trials. You will have tribulations. He closes the thought by saying, take heart because I have overcome the world, which means even when we have challenges and when we have trouble, it doesn't mean that the world is not in the hands of Jesus. It doesn't mean he's not in complete control. It doesn't mean he's not sovereign over all situations, but just as much as he guarantees the peace that we can find in him, he guarantees the fact that because we live in a broken world, we're gonna deal with the brokenness of life. The idea of family is God's idea. The idea of marriage is God's idea. The idea of raising up godly kids is God's idea. But we have to come to an understanding that a message like today is still incredibly crucial for us to understand, and this morning, I wanna talk to you about the fact that, ah, those of us have experienced that families do break. So what I wanna navigate is what do we do, how do we live when the family breaks? People deal with the brokenness of family

due to divorce, due to estrangement, due to sometimes someone losing their life, and does that mean we turn our back on God? Does that mean we start over and try to find a different savior? Does that mean we just try to find a different source of joy, a different source or definition of love? You know what we've done in our society lately? We actually try to find a different source and definition of family. But the definition, the understanding, the beauty of the word remains the same. When the family breaks, when we deal with the brokenness of family, I like to describe it as empty chairs. See, this whole mess, this whole series has been called A Seat at the Table, and many of us in this room have dealt with empty chairs at that table. And can I tell you something? Empty chairs changes the way we see the world. Empty chairs begin to change what and who we celebrate. It changes who and what we grieve. It changes our decision-making. Empty chairs, at times, if we're not careful, can change the way we see humanity. Empty chairs can change the way we see God. Empty chairs can change the way we see relationships, can change the way we see marriage.

It's the way we can change the way we see our own kids, our own identity. attempt to be good parents. Empty chairs. But what makes it even more challenging is those empty chairs lead us to a place of brokenness and a place of pain that actually gives us some pretty tough landings. There's a list up here of some of the landing places of those that have dealt with empty chairs in their life. Some of the landings include insecurity, a life that's just completely riddled with insecurity, resentment, resentment towards the one who left, resentment towards the one who didn't raise you, who didn't come back, bitterness, bitterness towards God, bitterness towards those parents, bitterness towards people who actually do have a nuclear functioning family, a lack of trust, even covetousness. Covetousness, I wish I was in that family. I wish I had what they had. Pride, when it comes to pride of the empty chairs, you know, one of the biggest lies I've told throughout my life when it comes to dealing with the empty chairs and the brokenness of my own life, you know, one of the greatest lies I've told? I'm good. One of the greatest lies I've told over years is it doesn't affect me anymore. There was more there, they took them down, but they were important, I promise you.

The one that I do wanna settle on just for a moment here is replication. I've had an opportunity over the years at different times to be a part of our Caring Discipleship Counseling, and the truth is, as a youth pastor, you are a counselor, so doing that, leading young people, and the one thing that I've seen and heard and experienced so much in those one-on-one discipleship moments and those counseling moments, and it's really, one of the saddest statements that I hear said so often is when a young person, or regardless of age, regardless of stage of life, when they say, I became everything I hated about my parent. I told myself I would never drink like they did. I would never touch drugs like they did. I would never cheat like they did. I would never walk out like they did. I would never show the anger expressions like they did. I'll never helicopter them like they did, helicopter my kids the way that they did. I'll never be so flippant about my decisions. I'll never be so cold like they were, and here we are, replicating the patterns that we've seen and grown up with, even if we try to deny that we're replicating those things, even if we try to say, even if we try to use the fact that they did it as a crutch, I'm only doing what I saw, and so what we come to understand is that due to these empty chairs,

due to the fact that God wants us to gather at the table, meaning he wants us to enjoy family, he wants us to engage in family, but while understanding that there's empty chairs, we have to understand this. Brokenness of a family can happen in a moment. Brokenness in a family can happen from one person's decision. Brokenness in a family can happen from one person making a decision to leave, one person making a decision to allow addiction into their life, one person can make a decision that they just don't wanna be a part of their family anymore. It's weird. I've heard that statement before. I just don't want to live with my family anymore. I don't wanna raise my kids. I don't wanna love my wife anymore, so I'm just gonna go start over somewhere else, but here's the challenging part about that. One decision and one moment can bring brokenness in the family, but do we realize it actually takes the healing of individuals to be made whole? Brokenness can happen as a collective. Healing has to happen individually. There's not some one-stroke moment that everyone in the family can be healed. There can be a one-stroke moment where we all experience brokenness,

but there can't be a one-stroke moment that heals us all. It's the same thing like when we talk about salvation. Your parents getting saved doesn't mean that all of a sudden you're saved. It's an individual choice. It's an individual journey. Many people may be wondering then, so I don't feel like I don't want to list like qualifications to being up here because I don't have many, but at the same time, yeah, my walls are blank. There's no degrees and stuff up there, but at the same time, I know a thing about empty chairs. So if we haven't met, my father is the lead pastor of this church. My parents started this church in 1993. I was seven years old. I thought I was gonna be an elder because there was no one else, but they didn't make me an elder at seven, but I've watched my parents build this church from 1993. I watched them pray. I've watched them gather. Every CLG was in our house. Monday, they say we have a CLG every day of the week these days at CTC. That was always a thing. It was just in one house. I've woken up at different times and found different people sleeping on couches

and sleeping in guest rooms as my family, my parents helped fight for people's marriage and raised up people off the streets and raised up leaders and truly extended from here. And they began to travel to China and travel to India and travel to Africa and watch them build an incredible, powerful ministry all while at the same time their marriage was falling apart. I sat and watched my parents counsel other couples to help their marriage come back together even though theirs failed. I've stood here year after year, week after week, having to navigate the fact that we're living in dreams, that we're living in prophetic words that were spoken when my mom was here. Prayers that she prayed, moments that she prayed in this building when no one else was there. Moments that she spoke strength when no one else was being strong and now she's way across the country and doesn't even get to experience or live this out. I've said it before, just by you sitting here right now, hearing this message, even though God has given me the opportunities to preach all over the country and to preach in multiple nations and all these different things, just by sitting here right now, you've been in more services

where I've preached than my mom. I know something about empty chairs. I know something about wondering, God, how did it get this way? How did we land here? How can I look to you and still say you're good when I'm so broken on the inside? I didn't say it in the other services, but I'll say it now. Having to navigate through hearing an incredible preacher and pastor preach week after week and having to fight through the brokenness and bitterness of my heart knowing you divorced my mom. And I'm not gonna get into the details of who chose what and how that went, it doesn't matter, but it happened. Making a decision, do I wanna work for that organization? Do I wanna be a builder of that house that broke right in front of me? I know something about empty chairs. Having a mentor in my life for 10 years, all the highest moments, all the lowest moments, and even now, when I'm experiencing things, wanting to reach in my pocket and text and call Pastor Ralph knowing he's with Jesus now and he's not coming back. I know something about empty chairs. I know how empty chairs can send me to heaven. I know how empty chairs can send me into a spiral and the truth is, I sat there in my brokenness for so long.

Every one of my siblings have dealt with some form of substance abuse, some going to rehab, all these different things. And I think to myself, when we're talking about the unity of families, when we talk about God being in this and God being the unifier and the strengthener, what about us? What does that mean for us? It means that we see this place in scripture that we see a man sitting in his brokenness. It's in John chapter five. I'm gonna read just real briefly, John chapter five, nine verses. It says this in John chapter five, verse one through nine. After this, there was a feast of the Jews and Jesus went up to Jerusalem. Now there is in Jerusalem by the sheep gate a pool, an Aramaic called Bethesda, which has five roofed colonnades. There was a multitude of invalids, blind, lame and paralyzed. One man was there who had been an invalid for 38 years. When Jesus saw him lying there and knew that he had already been there for a long time, he said to him, do you want to be healed? The sick man answered him, sir, I have no one to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up. And while I'm going another steps down before me. Jesus said to him, get up, take up your bed and walk.

And at once the man was healed and took up his bed and walked. All the different things we talk about when it comes to empty chairs and the brokenness of family, the main thing that we have to recognize is that we've got to deal with our own brokenness. And in order to deal with our own brokenness, let's find out what happened when this man in his brokenness had an interaction with Jesus. And Jesus starts off with an interesting question. The first thing he asked him is, do you want to be healed? It almost sounds like a trick question, right? Do you want to be healed? There's other versions of scripture where the question is written as, do you want to be made well? Now, truthfully. Wellness is such a hot topic these days, and I love it. I'm here for it. No, I don't do CrossFit or High Rocks or Hot Rocks or any of that stuff. Wellness is something, you don't have to wonder why people wanna be well. You don't have to wonder why people wanna be healthy. In fact, some of it may even go a little too far. We have, I don't know how many unofficial phlebotomists on our staff these days. This shot can make you skinny by next week. Get away from me.

How'd you even get that? Like, guys, people go to school to give shots. You can't just decide all of a sudden, I can do it. Other times thinking about wellness, there's people who go to become, they wanna do what they can in their journey to be well, and they start putting that on you, cross diagnosis. I'll call up my wife when it comes to this. She goes to her wellness doctor, blood work and all these different things and gets on all these supplements. Hey, babe, how was your appointment? Good, you are diabetic. What? I wasn't even there. My legs fell asleep because I sat there too long. But here's the truth. Normally, people don't have to wonder why you're pursuing wellness. People don't have to wonder why they're pursuing healing, but you know who always ask a question about your wellness despite what they know? Your physician. They have imaging, sometimes x-rays, MRIs. They have blood work. They know your medications. They know your height, your weight, your vision, whatever they do to check your ears, all that kind of stuff. Nurse does all those things.

Then they walk in and what does the doctor say? What can I do for you? I'm gonna neck brace. Why do they ask that? Because based on what they know, there's a lot they can do. They wanna know what you're looking for. They wanna know what you're here for. And it was the same with Jesus in that moment. Do you wanna be made well? Do you want to be healed? You know the other reason why he asked that question? I love this commentator named William Barclay about this passage. He said, because healing costs. Because when you become healed, you can't continue to do broken people stuff. When you are healed, you can no longer navigate with your broken decisions. When you are healed, you can no longer use the empty chairs and brokenness of your past as a crutch. When you are healed, you can't still lash out. You can't still over drink. You can't still scroll through and send that inappropriate text when you're a healed person. Broken people stuff is for broken people. Healed people navigate as a person who's been healed and restored by Jesus. You have to let go of the brokenness that you've become so familiar with

when Jesus steps in and heals. So he asked him, do you want to be healed? Do you want to be made well? And it's so interesting, the man's response. The man looks back at him and says, sir, I have no one to put me in the water when the water is stirred. When the water is stirred, someone gets in before me. There's this understanding, almost a bit of what you can call a tradition in that area at the time that an angel comes down every once in a while and stirs the water and when the water bubbles, whoever gets into it, when the water is bubbling, they become healed. Jesus is the healer. Jesus is the restorer and he's looking this man in the face and he's saying, do you want to be healed? And the man's eyes, instead of being on Jesus, his eyes are on the water. Charles Spurgeon says that we have the healer in our midst, the healer in our presence. And you know what our eyes are? On the water. And you know what the water is? Our own method of healing that we believe we need. With the empty chairs, Jesus is like, do you want to be made well? And you're saying, I need an apology. Do you want to be made well? I need reconciliation.

Jesus is saying, do you want to be healed? I need a new job. Do you want to be healed? I need that education. Do you want to be healed? I need more success. That man putting his eyes on the water instead of putting his eyes on Jesus who's posing the question to him, it actually sounds a lot like my prayer life sometimes, if I'm able to be honest. Oftentimes my prayer life is basically asking Jesus to escort me to what I believe I need. My eyes are on the water. My eyes are on the method that I believe we can just get this, we're gonna be good to go. If I can just get this, if I can just get there, if I can just attain this, achieve this, I'm gonna be okay. Where Jesus is saying, I am that. I am him. Everything you need is in me, but you want me to try to get you to the water when I am the water. And so Jesus gives him. his instructions, and it's beautiful. Because the first thing he tells him to do is the thing that he's never been able to do for 38 years. He says, get up. What happens when we're in our brokenness

and we have an encounter with Jesus, the first thing that he gives us the opportunity to do is get up from our brokenness. What does it look like to get up from your brokenness? Getting up from your brokenness means that you're gonna start doing the things. You're gonna go to the counseling and do the homework. You're actually gonna be not just a consuming member of your church, but an active member that serves, that gives, that loves on people, that gathers with people. Getting up means you're gonna celebrate people that are in seasons that you can only wish you were in. Getting up means that you're actually gonna pursue the dream, pursue the goal. Getting up means that you're not gonna stay and settle in your brokenness anymore, and because of Jesus, he's empowered you and strengthened you to do what you thought you couldn't do anymore, to do what you thought you could never do. Jesus's first words to him is, get up. Oftentimes, we, there in our brokenness, and we're asking Jesus, there's been empty chairs in my life. I've gone through such deep level of pain, and Jesus is saying, get up, and instead, we keep telling him how broken we are, telling him how hurt we are, trying to find more people to affirm us,

trying to find people to feel sorry for us, trying to find people to rally around us and do all the things for us, when Jesus is saying, I've empowered you to get up, go do it. Get up. The next thing he tells him, he says, get up. Take up your bed. Take up your bed. I'm sorry about that. I just realized that was quite the view you guys had there. Should've bent my knees. My knees are gone. Take up your bed. It says he told him to get up and take up his bed. Why would he have him take up his bed if he was no longer broken and crippled? He had him take up his bed so that going back to that brokenness and going back to that broken place was no longer an option. When Jesus encounters us and brings us out of our brokenness, we have to close the back door. When Jesus encounters us and takes us out of the broken places, the broken thought patterns, the broken love patterns, the broken views of humanity, the broken views of society, the broken views of his world, when he brings us out of that brokenness, we have to take up our bed and just say this. We have to understand, maybe there's more things

I'm gonna learn and grow from. Yes, I'm going in that direction. Maybe it's not always perfect. Yes, I still have challenges. Yes, I still have struggles, but I'm not going to that place of brokenness that I came from before. I will not live in that space of brokenness because it's up and it's lifted. That pad of brokenness will no longer define me. That's no longer gonna be my home. That place of brokenness is no longer gonna be my familiar safe space. Familiar safe space of isolating from my spouse. That familiar safe space of just drinking myself to joy. Familiar safe space of once again having more success so I can ignore the pain in my heart and pain in my mind. I'm not going back to that broken place. The other reason why Jesus had him pick up his bed is truthfully, this pool of Bethesda area, there were thousands of people there. It's a large area. It's the size of two football fields and there's people sitting in bleachers and off to the side and all these different things. And if he's been invalid for 30 years, it doesn't say that he's been in that spot for 30 years, but he's been invalid for quite a while. Anybody who recognized him, who saw him carrying that pad, they can say, wasn't that that guy?

Isn't that the guy that we're used to sitting in his brokenness? Isn't that the guy who always lashes out? Isn't that the lady who keeps being so promiscuous? Isn't that the man who never did take care of his kids? Isn't that the one who keeps starting business after business and failing? Isn't that the broken person that we know of? Isn't that the church hurt person who pastor had the scandal and they all got spit out and went separate ways and nobody landed well? Isn't that them? But you see, this man, after having this encounter with Jesus and being an opportunity and being in a space where he can get up and take up his bed, now he can say, yeah, that was me. Yeah, I was the one stuck in my brokenness. Yeah, I was the one who couldn't get up. Yeah, I was the one begging for somebody. Yeah, I was the one looking at the water. Yeah, I was the one who ran out of solutions. Yeah, I was the one who ran out of answers. And I'm keeping this bed with me because I wanna be able to say, look what the Lord has done. There's a reason. why when we do our baptisms when people go public with their faith we never say hey just go back there and tell everybody the good news of your life and call it good they don't go back there and say like i graduated from college married my high school sweetheart and we have two beautiful

kids hey you know what they talk about they talk about the brokenness of their life before they encounter jesus they talk about the brokenness of life before they understood the the truth of his word and they understand that that the power that is available to them because of the holy spirit the wisdom and the goodness that's available to them because of the holy spirit you know why they they say that because that's them still with their mat in hand saying this is who i was and this is who i am and it's all because of jesus that's why we show those every week that's why we want to pick up our mat and then and he says get up take up your bed and walk why did he tell him to walk why did he feel the need to give him instructions to walk because sometimes when we're dealing with empty chairs and we're dealing the brokenness of losing people in our life when jesus starts to recover us when he starts to restore us we're only looking to try to break even if i can just get back to how i was if i can get back get back to the level of joy that i had before if i can get back to the level of feeling that that inner fulfillment that i had before you know what jesus is saying by walk i want you to go beyond what you thought you could do i actually want you to begin to do things that you never even envisioned yourself doing before how many of us understand that even though we have empty chairs in our life or maybe you're like me and you you have a a whole complete table but you're still you're still living in the personal effects of empty chairs that you were raised with i don't know if that's your story but that's as you can hear that's mine but how many of you have come to a point where you start to think that i i have to live within these limitations i have to live with it with an understanding that yeah i have divorced parents yeah my parents went to prison yeah my parents were on drugs so at least i can everybody in town knows that this person cheated and so and so if i can just make it through life with with with people not looking at me with those sympathetic eyes i think i'm gonna be all right can i tell you something jesus says get up take up your bed and walk because he wants you to understand that the circumstances that you've lived through and the empty chairs that you've had to endure and the empty chairs that have been at your table and the empty chairs that you grew up with at your table that does not eliminate you from the master powerful plan of god for your life listen scripture says it very clear we serve a god that does exceedingly and abundantly above all we can ask think or imagine that means you the bible says that that the enemy comes to steal kill and destroy but i've come to give you life from life more abundantly

abundant life is for people who grew up with empty chairs there's abundant life for people who've had to endure years decades of brokenness brokenness is not the end of your story brokenness is not the end of your journey people are going to come and go but what does the bible say jesus is the same yesterday today and forever which means that you can get up you can pick up your bed and you can walk you can do things that you never thought you would do you can do things that statistics said you would never do you know one statistic i never read what they say about young people with divorced parents what they say about the the generational leading up if this parent gets divorced hey not i and not my kids why because we're walking we're living out wholeness we're living out freedom we're living out what it looks like after you encounter with jesus and understand i would live in no fear of that but here's the good thing though it doesn't mean that there's not going to be highs and lows of life it doesn't mean that they're not going to be highs and lows of family it's you know what i love that we have families like this like the family of god that we can actually even spend time with when we need to come up for air that's actually a good part of getting up my dad and my mom one thing i saw them do in their healing process they started showing up to things by themselves some of you guys have been there where you circle circle the event and then just go home you don't you don't go into the event because they know you've been through a divorce they know you've been through broken things they know you've been through those challenges so everything inside of you wants to go to that event but you don't go because you don't want to walk into you in that yourself an example of getting up is actually going in and doing the things you know what else my parents did they allowed us through all that brokenness to go to other families houses so we can come up for air my dad even did the same thing my mom even did the same thing my dad these days you could probably just call him tyrone p jones stalwart because he does all of his holidays with them and he put himself in place when there's tension in the home and i'm not saying you're replacing your family but you have to go to fair that are safe so you can just come up for air. That's why I'm so thankful for families like, for us, for my girls. My life's not always gonna be perfect. I firmly believe that my marriage is gonna stay intact until the day that I die.

But you know what I do? I make sure that there's families that my kids know that they can go to when they need to come up for air, when they need to be loved on, when they need to be celebrated. So I'm so thankful that I had that for me. Joe and Debbie Hovenal, my Tia Emily, I love so much. People that took me in, Linda Lujan, and we've established that for our kids. Guys, don't wait until tragedy to find out who your village is. Something goes on with my family, the Ops are on the way, the Crouches are on the way, the Villalobos family is on the way. You gotta know that for yourself. Why, because what does God do? Psalm 68, six says, God puts the lonely in families. So even though that there's empty chairs at your natural table, it doesn't mean that you won't have a loving and beautiful and thriving family here in the kingdom of God. He puts the lonely in families. We've gotta walk, we've gotta move. We've gotta make a decision that we're not gonna stay in that brokenness. And here's why we are able to make that decision, because that decision was made for us to begin with. When Jesus made a decision to go to the cross,

when he took our pain, shame, and brokenness on himself, and sacrificed his life with his death, burial, and resurrection, it was a understanding to us that he took it so we don't have to live in it. And a yes to him, a yes to him, allows us to live in a place of wholeness, to live in a place of freedom, to live in a place of goodness. And here's the best part of it all. You see, there's gonna be times where we face empty chairs in our life. There's gonna be times, I wish it didn't happen, where we're gonna face the brokenness, whether it's a family or just the brokenness of life in general. But here's the best part. There's one chair that I know, that I know, that I know, that will never be empty. It's not a folding chair. It's not a soccer chair. It's not even a church chair. It's a throne. And Jesus Christ will forever be on the throne. He will never, ever, ever be lifted. That's an unshakable kingdom. It says in Revelation 19 that he's the King of kings and the Lord of lords. So no matter what empty chairs you face at your table, no matter what empty chairs you face in your life,

no matter what brokenness you face in your life, no matter what pain you face in your life, I want you to understand that because that chair is filled, you can dream again. Because that chair is filled, you can live again. Because that chair is filled, you can find love again. Because that chair is filled, you can go and do things that the world says you can never do. Why? Because we serve a God that says, his goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life. And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. And he says that you can be made whole. You're not defined by your mom. You're not defined by your dad. You're not defined by drugs. You're not defined by alcohol. You're not defined by cheating. You're not defined by the pursuit of success. You are defined by the one who designed you. And that's the King of all the earth. You're defined by the one who saves you. And that's Jesus. And he did it on the cross. And because he did it, no one can ever undo it. And because he promised you, no one can break that promise. Jesus is the one who makes it possible for you to live, for you to love, for you to pursue.

All because of Jesus. All because of Jesus, we can get up, pick up our bed, and walk. There's generational changers in this house. Micah, you're a generational changer. The chains that have been on you, the chains that have been on your lineage are broken. They're broken because you've said yes to Jesus. You've said yes to his ways. You've sat in this church by yourself many times, not a family member near you, but you say, Jesus, I trust you. That's what generational change is. Nathan, you're leading generational change for your family. You're leading generational change. The ought name will be seen forever differently through you because you made a decision to raise your family in the house of the Lord, to live a life that's no longer in brokenness, not standing down on that pad, but picking up the pad and saying, look what the Lord has done. We have elders many times who could have just accepted defeat, but they continue to fight and push and live and breathe, trusting the Lord. Why? Because they understand that what he has for them is greater than anything the world can offer. I wanna give an opportunity.

I wanna give an opportunity. I actually wanna pray for some people just right here. I just wanna steward a moment. We're not gonna have the altar workers come. For those of you who can say, I have empty chairs in my life, or I grew up with empty chairs and it's affected my view of God, my view of life, I'm still in my brokenness. For those of you today who say, I want to get up and maybe you're saved, but you're down in your brokenness and you're stuck in your brokenness, I just wanna pray for you, but I'm not gonna invite you to altar workers. I'm gonna invite you to a moment here at the altar. we're gonna worship you're gonna worship here at the altar for some of you it may be some confession I remember it took me years to confess for the first time Lord that hurt it hurt to face people if hurt to face people in this building it hurt to encourage people to keep enduring the things of their family when I know mine didn't work out confession but then also confessing but Lord I believe you I believe in you as a restorer I believe in you as a healer and I'm gonna count to three and there's some of you today who for the first time or maybe again you're gonna come to the altar and you're gonna say Lord I receive your healing those empty chairs aren't gonna define me the brokenness isn't gonna define me I want to get up I want to take up my bed and I want to walk before you come forward I want you to let you know this it's not by your design that you're here and it's not by your design that you'll be healed it's by the design of Jesus Christ it's by the design and sovereign hand of your Lord that loves you and second sometimes healing is in a moment and sometimes healing is in a

process but it all starts with an encounter with Jesus similar to the story of Zacchaeus there were there were thousands of people there at Bethesda that day and you'll see later in the chapter that guy didn't even know who Jesus was but Jesus chose in that moment that I'm gonna go to you you don't have to know me you don't have to believe in me but I'm coming to you in the moment because I want to bring change to you so if that's you today I'm gonna pray and I'm gonna invite you to just come forward so Lord I thank you for each and every person as they respond for each and every person that's making a decision that they're gonna get up they're gonna take up their bed but they're gonna walk Lord we're thankful that you love families that you're in the center of families we're thankful God that you've made a decision that you can heal us from our brokenness you can heal us in the moments that hurt but Lord more than anything your presence is enough your goodness in our life is enough Lord we're releasing to you the hurt of the empty chairs the hurt of divorce the hurt of lying the hurt of cheating the hurt of losing people in our life and we're trusting God that what we need and what we believe and what we long for is a Savior that's seated on the throne a Savior that we can trust and we can look to that won't let us down I thank you Lord that you have brought us to a place of restoration a place of being replenished no more lost hope no more lost love Lord because you are a lover of our soul because you are the hope for our soul because you are the source of peace and joy so we ask today that each and every one of these people Lord that you minister through their moment of worship through their moment of surrender through their moment of confession that you minister in Jesus name in Jesus name come on let's worship together let's worship together she's Jesus even I see for those who are here responding to the altar I'm just gonna invite you to

keep your eyes closed keep your arms open for those that are left in the sanctuary I'm gonna ask you to stretch your hand forward stretch your hand forward we're gonna go through this as a family as a body Lord I thank you so much for being a healer I thank you Lord for being a restore a restore of hearts a restorer of the broken I thank you Lord that you've made a choice to draw each one of these to you draw them to your presence draw them to an understanding that you know every hurt you know every bit of the pain you know every bit of the lack you know every bit of the doubt we're thankful God that you are a healer in this moment what I thank you that you can reverse the images you can reverse the memories and that you can begin to restore the joy of their salvation the intrigue of the idea of knowing that they can live a healed life that they can live a life that's that's limited of them of all of the the brokenness that they thought they were consumed with what I pray that in this moment each and every one of these these people that are gathered here at your altar Lord that they release and they give and they lay it down never to pick it up again. Lord, I pray that you surround them with church family members that love them, that will encourage them, that will build them up. Lord, I pray by the power of your Holy Spirit that you begin to restore their joy and understanding of your peace that's made available. Lord, we thank you that you are a God that truly understands everything about our life, but you're still guiding and leading beyond and beyond and beyond what we can think and imagine. I thank you for your healing. I thank you for your restoration. I thank you for generational chains being broken. I thank you for changing stories. I thank you for changing directions. We thank you for purpose. We thank you for destiny. We lift you up. We worship you. We look to you. We glorify your name. We pray all this in Jesus' name. Amen, amen, amen. Come on, let's worship together. Over every enemy Jesus, for my family I speak the holy name, Jesus Your name is power Your name is healing Your name is love Break every stronghold Shine through the shadows

Burn like a fire Your name is power Your name is healing Your name is love Break every stronghold Shine through the shadows Burn like a fire Your name is power Your name is healing Your name is love Break every stronghold Shine through the shadows Burn like a fire Love you so much, church. Be blessed and we'll see you this Wednesday for First Wednesday. God bless you.