Do Hard Things | Adam Weber

If I had to give a number, nine out of 10 men, instead of leading spiritually, what do we do? We pass it off to someone else. We will do anything and everything possible, literally, to not spiritually lead ourselves. And today, I just want to say, men, you need to stop it. Grown men in the Embrace Church, you need to stop it. You're done with that. You are done doing that. And you need to start leading spiritually. Thank you for worshiping with us here today. I hope you're doing well. I hope it's been a great day so far. My name's Adam. I'm one of the pastors here. And we are just overjoyed that you decided to come and gather with us. I mentioned it last week. This is our 20th year as a church. Embrace turns 20 years old this September. And I cannot wait to see all that God has in store, even in this year ahead. And speaking of that today, we are continuing on in our new series called Be a Man. I mentioned this last week. This is a series that I've been wrestling with and praying about for several years now. And I have to confess, one of the main reasons, if not the reason, that we haven't done this series sooner is because it's really only geared

towards half of our church, right? Men, men, even though we got a ladies' night coming up at the end of the month, I didn't want the other half of our church, women, feeling overlooked or unseen. And so last week, after several years of wrestling around with it, we started up the series. And I genuinely believe it is the most text messages, emails, conversations that I have ever had about a single message. But here's what surprised me the most. A majority of the messages, conservatively, four to one came from women. I just couldn't believe it. Women who just reached out and just said, hey, Adam, I just want to say thank you. I just want to say thank you. You're not thanking me, you're thanking the Lord. Today, again, I want to start with these words found in the book of Genesis, where we're told this. Then the Lord God formed a man from the dust of the ground, and he breathed life into his nostrils, the breath of life. And the man became a living being. OK, so try and picture this. He took some dirt from the ground. He gathered a pile of dirt, and we're told he formed a man. And then we're told that God breathed life into his nostrils. This is so powerful. The man, he came alive only after God breathed life into his lungs.

Speaking of this verse, Genesis 2, 7, you should have gotten a fake tattoo when you came in today if you didn't, make sure you get one. Men, just a pro tip, ask a woman around you to help you with these fake tattoos. I had two failures before I had a gal help me, and it was finally a victory. I think it's easier to get a real tattoo than it is a fake one. And so if you're looking for an idea, there you go. But here's this, the heart of this verse is our hope for this series. And so that's why we're highlighting it, that the heart of this verse is the hope for this series, that God would come and breathe life into you. Whether you're 20 years old, whether you're 60 years old, that he'd come and he'd breathe life through this series. He'd breathe life into your lungs. That if you're here, and as a man, you feel like a pile of dirt on the ground, that God will come and make you alive. That's our hope for this series. And so an important question to ask at the start is, well, what does it mean to be a man? Well, we mentioned it last week. Biologically, there's some basic things that make a dude a dude, right? But away from biology, because that's not the focus of this series, what does it mean to be a man?

Well, there's all the stereotypes, right? What a man is, what a man is like. But just to acknowledge it, the stereotypes don't always match. It's not always true. And I can speak personally from that, OK? Like, I'm the guy who's got a manly beard, and it's TMI, but I have hair everywhere, literally everywhere. You're like, I didn't need that this morning. But then on the flip side, I have these baby soft hands, okay, they're so baby soft, be gentle with them. And then I love football, but I also love interior design. Like genuinely, it's one of my favorite things. My wife always says, before getting married, I thought I would be the one who got to decorate the house all by myself. And then she says, and then I married you. It's like, that's a bonus, right? Like I'm the guy who likes old cars and a good cigar, but in my marriage, I'm the one who likes to talk about their feelings every single day. I like shooting guns and playing with fire, but unlike my dad, I can't fix anything. I can't fix a car engine, I can't fix a light switch, I can't fix a toilet, I honestly can't fix anything at all. One of the toilets in our house right now has been struggling for months to flush. It's the most basic thing I know it is, but I can't fix it. Once again, though, what does it mean to be a man? Well, throughout this series,

we're highlighting eight different truths that we need to pursue as men, and not just as men, but as godly men. And to be so clear, all of these eight truths apply to women as well. Women, you should, and you can pursue these as well, but specifically as guys, if we wanna become men who are filled with God's breath, if we wanna be men who are fully alive, each of these eight truths is so critically important. Okay, so today, the first truth, if you wanna be a man that is filled with the breath of God, if you wanna be a man that is fully alive, do hard things. Again, if you wanna come alive, if you wanna be the man that God created you to be, do hard things. To be clear, doing hard things is all about consistently showing up. It's doing the same hard thing day after day after day over and over again. Listen to these words from the apostle Paul. Paul says, let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time, we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Paul's saying, don't get tired of doing good. Basically, don't get tired of doing the same hard things. And hear this, for in time, you will reap a harvest. I love how the New Living Translation puts it, for in time, you will reap a harvest of blessings if you don't give up.

Okay, so just to highlight these words from Paul, I wanna, you guys actually don't know that I have a twin brother, but I do. I wanna introduce you to my twin brother. His name is Austin. He's a tenant embrace for years. Don't Austin and I look like twins? Both 6'1", give or take. Some of us are 6'3". Both jacked, both dangerously good looking. Kind of funny, the other day, Austin, a week and a half ago, not connected to this, he randomly came up in conversation with a group of men, and one of the guys just said, can you imagine looking as good as Austin Lukey? I just said back, I can't, I can't. All day long, I just wanna touch my chest. I just wanna run my fingers up and down my chest. I'd never be so excited about dirty laundry. I'd just be like, honey, let me do the laundry today, okay? I just wanna check that out. Before I get any DMs, I wanna make sure this last bit, yeah, he's married, okay? So ladies, chill out, all right? Chill, chill out. Here's the point though. Being in shape like Austin doesn't happen overnight. Reaping a harvest of being a stud, it takes time. This week, I called Austin and I asked if I could talk about his body in church.

He said back to me, he's like, Adam, that's really, really weird, but sure. I was like, I'm taking that as a yes, okay? But I just asked Austin, I'm like, how long have you been consistently working out? He's like, probably seventh grade. Okay, on average, how many days a week do you work out? Austin's like four to five times a week, sometimes three, typically around four or five. Let me just translate this for us. This is 25 years of consistently doing the same hard thing day after day after day after day. All of us wanna look good, right? All of us wanna six pack like Austin, of course we do, but very, very, very, very few of us are willing to consistently do the hard thing over and over and over again. Okay, so that's Austin and his health as an example. Man, listen up. This is true in every single area of your life. Truly, most things in life that will fill you with joy. Most things in life that will make you come alive, take doing hard things over and over and over and over. Again, I'm just saying, I see so many men who just kind of grumble or underneath the surface, they're like, I want this and I want that. And I would just wish I had this promotion. And I don't know why I've never gotten a promotion. And I just wish that I had a wife like that person does. And I just wish I had a marriage like them.

And I just wish I had this house and this car and I don't know why I'm not happy. And often what we're looking for as men, shortcuts. Men, shortcuts don't exist. At least not in life, they don't. And so similar to getting in great shape, do you wanna have a great marriage? It doesn't just magically happen. And some of us just magically got a right person. Instead, it takes daily deciding to love your wife. Daily deciding to encourage her. Daily looking for ways to serve her. Daily deciding to not look at and check out other women in person or on your phone. Daily saying, I'm sorry. Daily saying, please forgive me. Daily deciding to do the hard things. Speaking of marriage, men, if you're single, you wanna have a great marriage someday? Start honoring God today. Start honoring him in your dating life, in your private life right now. Daily deciding to have standards and who you'll date and what you will do with them. And how about work? You want the promotion? Instead of constantly thinking about how awesome you'd be at that position, instead of constantly complaining, which by the way, adds more work onto your boss, which by the way, will rarely result in a promotion.

I would just ask at work, are you crushing it right now? Are you crushing every single opportunity? Well, that's so insignificant and that's above me. Really, it is? Are you crushing it right now? Are you willing to do the same, the hard things, the same hard things every single day that no one else at work is willing to do? You see, the truth is, whether it's your finance, getting more playing time on the team, raising kids, pursuing a goal, having more joy and peace in your life, once again, there are no shortcuts, men. And it's so counterintuitive. These daily hard decisions, they feel like constraints and they feel restricting and they feel boring. But as men, they're often the key for coming alive. And so for all of us men, every single day, daily, consistently, you wanna come alive, do the hard things. Okay, so the second truth today, if you wanna be a man that is fully alive, filled with God's breath, own your stuff. Own your stuff. Again, if you wanna come alive, if you wanna be filled with the breath of God, if you wanna be the man that God has called you to be, own your stuff. For the record, I wanted to use a different word instead of stuff,

but Travis Waltner wouldn't let me, okay? Own your stuff. To talk about this point, I wanna mention something that I, it's kind of funny, kind of not, that I know is a super, super touchy subject for some of us men, going bald, all right? I'm willing to go there, okay? Losing your hair. The other day, I was with a group of women, I was trying to explain to them for the fact that for guys who are going bald, very few things are more sensitive. I know that's hard to relate to. Like, if you're going bald as a duty, it's super, super sensitive. And that's why guys will do anything to try and hide it, right? We'll try the shag look. Well, even worse, we'll try the comb over look. Sometimes it's like a dead raccoon on the side of the road and we just kind of hope to strap it to the top of our head. I'll never forget though. Years ago, one day, I was, we came home from church. It was in my first year of marriage. I was going to seminary in Kentucky. After church that day, my wife said, it's time. I was like, time for what? That sounded, that sounded awesome.

I was like, what's, it's time, it is time. And she's like, no, it's time to buzz it. I'm like, we don't have a dog, what are we buzzing? She's like, your head. I'm tired of you constantly worrying about your hair and you're trying to shaggy look and you're not fooling anybody, just own it. And so I buzzed it, it was a moment of weakness. I buzzed it. For the next two days, and I'm not joking, I wore a hat. I was so insecure. And then finally it was just like, screw it. Nowadays, whenever I see a guy try and shag you or comb it over, it's like, dude, you're not fooling anyone. Everyone can see it. As a man, it is time to own it. It is time to buzz it. Seriously, Bruce Willis, Andre Agassi, The Rock, it will be the best decision you ever make in life. Bald men, I'm just saying, are hot. Okay? It's rad. It's awesome. Okay? By the way, this is just a note for all of you men with hair still. If you have a full head of hair and you try to have this conversation with a balding friend, just to let you know, this is just free information, we don't like you.

And you can shove it. Okay? Oh, you think I should buzz my head? I think I should drive over you with my pickup truck. Oh, is that the Holy Spirit talking? I think it might be. Okay? It's not sensitive at all. All joking aside, I genuinely believe that every single one of us, gals, this applies to you as well, specifically as men, every single one of us has something in our lives, a comb over, you could say, that everyone else can see and everyone else wants you to address, and you need to own it. You need to own it. I promise you it's there. If you don't think it's there, it's probably blowing in the wind even more. And everybody's like, oh, dear Lord, will somebody have that conversation with him? It's there. You need to own it. Seriously, for some of you men, maybe it's your attitude. And you're always so quick to get defensive. And so no one in your life, hear this, no one in your life, not your wife, not your kid, not your dad, no one can ever have a hard conversation with you because you're so defensive. I don't want to be mean.

You're a grown man, and yet you're a precious piece of china. Don't touch. Be careful. I'm not a, you're just like this dainty little piece of china. It's time to own it. Maybe for you it's an addiction. Everyone else can see that it's a problem except you. And they've tried to tell you, and you haven't listened. You're over there with your comb over. That's how dumb it looks, by the way. It's not a problem. Really? Maybe for you it's a relationship. Everyone is telling you to break up with your girlfriend. Everybody. Everyone is telling you that friendship doesn't make you a better person. Every time you go with that person, it's not good. And it's time, I'm going to speak to you as a man, it's time for you to own it. Adam, I'm a little boy. You wouldn't say that, but that's what you're acting like. It's time. It's time. Listen to these words from Solomon in the book of Proverbs. Men, by the way, if you're looking for something to read in scripture, go through Proverbs.

It's written right at us. Solomon says, whoever conceals their sins does not prosper, but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy. Solomon's telling us, whoever tries to conceal, whoever tries to cover up, whoever tries to gloss over, whoever tries to comb over sin or anything negative in your life will not prosper. Friends, hear this. That thing, whatever it is, it's keeping you from coming alive. That thing, whatever that comb over is, it's keeping you from being the man, from being the husband, from being the father, from being the leader, from being the difference maker that God has created us to be. It's time to own it. Once again, King Solomon says, you need to confess it. He says, you need to acknowledge it at all costs. You need to track it down. You need to own it. And men, just to let you know, if you do this, if you try to address this thing in your life, it can, and it most likely will be brutal to do so. And yet it's so worth it. Seriously, it is so much easier just to blame others. Well, I'm just angry because of my job. I'm angry because of my wife. Have you met her? I'm angry because my upbringing, my childhood wasn't as good as yours. It is so much easier to blame others

than it is to take responsibility. But just to highlight this, a defining characteristic of a man, you don't blame others. Let me say that again. If you're slow like me, and you need to hear it again, a main characteristic of what it means to be a man of God, you don't blame others. Instead, what you say is, this is on me. This is my problem. I need to deal with this. I need to chase this. this down. I need to own it truly. It is so much easier just to come up with excuses or to brush it off. Well, this is just the way that I am and this is just the man that I am and my father was the exact same way that might be true until you start following Jesus. That might be true until you start following Jesus. When you follow Jesus, that guy is dead. That old man, he no longer exists. So stop talking about him because if you follow Jesus, he makes you a new creation and you and I we need to own it. Just to acknowledge that some of us we can't see our Combover. And so we're sitting here. It's like somebody else must have a Combover. No, you do. You do. Again, if we want to become the men. That God has created us. He's wired us to be. We need to confess it. We need to acknowledge it.

We need to go see a Christian therapist. Maybe we need to ask our wives, our parents, our kids, our co-worker. What is our Combover? Can you see it? Can you help me see it? And then we need to own it. You need to own it. Okay. So today the third and final truth is this. If we want to be a man that is fully alive. Lead spiritually. Lead spiritually. If we want to be a man made. The man God made us to be. Lead spiritually. I mentioned him last week, a longtime friend of mine and mentor. His name is Brad Lamanick. Brad is 50 some years old. Just as a side note to mention. Brad's single, never been married, no kids. He's really just seen his life as a way to serve others. And so Brad loves Jesus. But what he's specifically known for is leadership. He's a leadership guy. He's written leadership books. He's got a leadership podcast and Brad is just an amazing man. No one outside the state of South Dakota has had a greater

impact on my life. Than Brad. So he's this amazing guy. He's constantly gathering leaders all over the country. In the first 10 years that I knew Brad, he'd pour in the leaders. He'd care for pastors, CEOs, athletes, all these different things. But when it came to anything spiritual, Brad would always pass it off to someone else. Like when it clearly came time to pray, he'd look around the room for a pastor. When it came to talking about Jesus, he'd physically turn his body and just be looking for someone to talk to do the talking. Seriously, anytime it involved anything spiritual, Brad would always pass it off to someone else. Well, a few years back, a mutual friend of Brad and I's confronted Brad about this. He just said, Brad, people are flying all over the country to be in this room because of you. Because of you. And that they are longing for you to spiritually lead. But every time an opportunity comes up, you pass it off to someone else. Like anytime there's an opportunity, you look around the room and you give it to somebody else. And then he just said this, and Brad, you need to stop it. You need to stop it.

You need to stop passing it off and you need to start leading spiritually. You're ready. Instead of passing it off, start leading. Well, man, I can't tell you how often I see men do this. I see it all the time. If I had to give a number 9 out of 10 men, instead of leading spiritually, what do we do? We pass it off to someone else. Instead of leading spiritually, what do we do? We pass it off to our wives. We pass it off to grandpa and grandma. If there's a pastor within a hundred miles of us, we wait for the pastor. With our kids, we pass it off to our youth leader. We pass it off to our e-kids pastor. Seriously, instead of leading spiritually, we'll give a book to somebody, we'll recommend a podcast to a friend. We will do anything and everything possible, literally, to not spiritually lead ourselves. And today, I just want to say, men, you need to stop it. Grown men in the Embrace Church, you need to stop it. You're done with that. You are done doing that and you need to start leading spiritually. I can't say this strong enough. Some of you have led companies and you've done all these things. I can't do this. Are you a little boy? I don't want to be mean, but are you a little boy?

You're a grown man. Yeah, you can do it. I don't know. I don't know. You're done with it. You're done. Well, my wife, no, no, no. I love that. your wife is going spiritually, you need to stop it and you need to start leading spiritually. I love these words from Joshua. Joshua's near the end of his life and he's speaking to all the people of God gathered there and he's challenging them to decide who they're going to serve. Will they serve God? Will they lead their families towards God or won't they? And then Joshua says this, if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. Again, Joshua's challenging all the people of God to decide will you serve God? Will you lead your families towards God or not? And then he just declares regardless of what all of you decide as for me in my house, as for me and my family, we are going to serve the Lord. He's like regardless of what all of you do. Great, me and my house. We're serving Jesus. I'm deciding to spiritually lead. Now men, to be so clear, you don't have to be Billy Graham

to spiritually lead. And you don't have to be a pastor to spiritually lead. Honestly, you might be better because you're not a pastor at spiritually leading. Pastors can be really, really weird. You don't need to know the Bible cover to cover. All you have to do is start. All you need to do is go first. All you need to do is start right where you are and start leading spiritually. Men, some level one basic ways that you can lead spiritually starting with the basics of the basics. You're looking for something basic, get to church. Every single week, get to church. Like just make the decision literally as the dad of this house. If you live with a group of dudes, just announce later today. Hey, every week we are going to church. We're just doing it like end of story. We don't need to talk about it. We're going to church and because we're not visiting this church, we're not going to watch online first. No, we're going in person every single week. Level one stuff, pray for your wife. Pray for your kids. Are you in college? Pray for your roommates, pray for your classmates, pray for your co-workers. Level one, if you haven't done so before, decide to follow Jesus and then tell your family and your friends. Seriously guys, your wife and kids shouldn't ever have to

wonder where you are spiritually. Well, I'm kind of a quieter man and I'm kind of a private person. I don't really care. As men, again, when you think about that, you're not a little boy. As grown men, you're going to tell your wife and kids, I follow Jesus. You follow Jesus, tell them. If you got classmates, friends, they shouldn't have to wonder, tell them. I'll never forget the day, talking about a quiet man. My dad is a quieter man. I'll never forget the day. It would have been probably 12, 15 years ago. My dad texted me, totally out of the blue. And he just said, Adam, I want you to know that I have a relationship with Jesus and I talk with him every single day. I'll never forget it. And since then, I'm so proud of my dad. He has taken step after step after step when it comes to spiritually leading. Are you wanting a little bit more than the basics? Level 2 and there's not levels to this, but if you're looking for a little bit more, level 2, pray with your wife. And don't wait for her to initiate it. And again, you're leading the charge. You're not waiting for her. Can we pray? No.

As a man, you're saying, hey, I'd love to pray with you. And if you don't feel comfortable, that's totally okay. But I just love to pray with you. Pray with your roommates. Pray with your kids. Ask a co-worker, hey, once a week, can you and I over lunch pray for our business? It's been so cool over the last seven days. I've had three different men tell me that they prayed out loud for the very first time, which is awesome. Can we just put it up and honor those guys? Awesome. Level 2, start tithing. Level 2, see a need around you and fill it. Level 2, like we talked about last week, start building up other men. Level 2, get baptized. Specifically, if you're 30, if you're 50, if you're 70 years old and God is moving in your life, get baptized, reaffirm your baptism. I'm just saying, when a grown man leans in, like if any of you decide to get baptized at our next Baptism Sunday in a way I can't explain, it will impact everyone around you, starting with your wife and your kids and your friends and your co-workers. This one act, you deciding to get baptized, can literally alter the course of your entire family. And so men, if you wanna come alive, if you wanna become the men that God has created you to be, start leading spiritually, lead, it's time. Okay, so today, these are the three truths that we're gonna cover. If you wanna come alive, if you want the breath of God in your lungs,

do hard things, own your stuff, lead spiritually. Next week, we're gonna cover the remaining three truths. If you didn't last week, get one of these signs. I wanna encourage you, young and old, to grab one of these as you go and put it somewhere that you'll see it often. Put it next to where you work out, put it next to where you pray, put it in your vehicle, put it on your bathroom mirror. If there's a bag or whatever, like a brief, whatever you have, just put it somewhere. I just encourage you to get that in your hands. And so there's that. And then to close our time today, right now at every campus, I'm gonna ask every guy, every man in your 30s and 40s right now across campuses to stand up. If that's you, if you're in your 30s and your 40s, don't be shy, I'm gonna invite you to stand. Man, I just love this. And then I'm gonna ask everyone just to put it up and honor them. I love this. I love this. Man, at this stage in life, I know that you're struggling so much. And most weeks, it's like you're just trying to survive the week, and yet on a Sunday morning, you could have slept in and you showed up. Well done, well done.

If you're not doing so already, specifically to this age group, again, we're no longer young men, we're men. And so if you haven't started, I wanna charge you and challenge you to start leading spiritually, to lean in. It's time, it is time for the sake of your wife, for the sake of your kids, for the sake of your coworkers, for the sake of your own soul, it is time to start leading spiritually, okay? It's time, it's time. You're ready, I promise you, you're ready, it's time. And then lastly, I just want you to, like each of us to make this decision. Again, Joshua, in front of the people of God, he asked them, who are you gonna serve? For all of us men, are you gonna serve your career? Are you gonna serve money? You got a lot of choices. My hope and prayer would be the words of Joshua, but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. And maybe you haven't done this in the past, and maybe you feel inadequate to do so. I'm just telling you again, it's time, you're ready. I pray you would make the decision in your soul. As for me and my house, as for me and my kids, as for me and my business, as for me in this field, this whatever, we will serve the Lord. Let's pray. God, we thank you for every single man who is standing.

I thank you, God. We need them in our church. We need them off the sidelines. And I know that this season in life is exhausting. You're running from one thing to the next, just trying to keep the plate spinning. And yet God, it's time for all of us to lean in. It is time for us to lean in. It is time for us to do hard things. It is time to own our crap. God, would you use us? Would you breathe life into us? Would you breathe the breath of life into our souls? And would we come alive? Lord, we love you. We thank you. We pray all these things in the name of Jesus. All God's people said, amen. Hey friends, it's Adam from Embrace. If today's message encouraged you, be sure to hit the subscribe button to our YouTube channel to see all new messages as they drop. Also feel free to click here and check out more of our videos. Thanks so much for watching.